Suzy: up the ass
Suzy: with their cows
Me: do you think we could make a living as condom professionals?
Suzy: YES
Suzy: Let's rule the world
Suzy: sharing our knowlege
Suzy: because yes...we read the instructions
Me: we could be like personal condom assistants
Me: as ppl begin to have sex, we could slip the condom on for them, so they dont need to
Me: this way it will be done correctly, everytime
Suzy: HAHAHHA
Suzy: i love you
Me: then in order for ppl to be prepared for sex, ppl will not only have to buy condoms, but they will have to hire an assistant as well...cand pay them hourly
Suzy: ERICA YOU WIN
Me: it will change people's perspectives, it will become standard...we would have begun a new era...WE WOULD RULE THE WORLD
Me: WOLRD DOMINATION AT LAST!!! MUAHAHAHAHA
Erika: oh as soon as i can eat again we are going to go eat everywhere! i miss food- and i look like shyt...i lost 7 pounds which makes me look like a holocaust victim
Suzy: mmmm...yes it is ass season
Justine: and u kno- i'll prob just turn into a nun or something
Justine: i cant take this shit
Me: HAHAHa...lets become nuns
Justine: ok!!!!!!!!!!
Justine: but i don't do the praying thing hahahah
Justine: or that whole black and white outfit...lol
Justine: OK SOLUTION!!!!!!!!!!
Justine: erica
Me: what??????
Justine: me and u will just have to become lesbians
Justine: idk...the whole lesbian thing scares me
Justine: ahhahaahhah
Me: hey.....i have an even better plan
Justine: there isnt a solution
Me: we play the whole lesbian thing for a while, but dont take it seriously...so that guys will look at us and be like...those girls are lesbians, how much hotter does it get?...then they will be like...damn, i want a piece of that...and the fact that they cant cuz we are lesbians will intensify our hotness
Me: and we could get any guy we want
Justin: omg!!!!!!!!
Justine: thats amazing
Me: we will be like 'untouchables' to them
Justine: simply amazing
Justine: i shud call u, ""dr. erica" from now on
Justine: that was beautiful
Justine: ::TEAR::
Webber: what if i gave u the most rememberal time in bed? ot if i took u out on a realy nice dinner?
Webber: your choice
Me: omg...do you think with just your penis??
Me: or does your brain function as well?
Webber: nah i used my brain on the dinner part
Me (to Jim): Suzy is just like Laura
Jim (to everyone): I have a backache, does anyone have Tylenol?
Suzy: No, but I have Tums!
Jim (turns to me): You were right, she is like Laura.
Justine: How do you spell out Rush Room 116 in Greek?
Krista: R-U-S-H R-O-O-M 1-16
Justine opens Steph's passenger car door, and attepts to catapult/squeeze herself into the backseat
Steph: umm, my car has four doors, sweetie.
Steph (to Jim): my mom asked how my computer broke, and I couldn't tell her it was because Erica was humping my bedpost
Me: haha...I thought you said you couldn't tell her how your "cooter" broke
Liz: we should backtrack and hit soem worthy ktown guys
Liz: though they're all mostly on so many drugs they couldn't tell the diff btwn doing us and their own moms
Liz: but still
Liz: whatever
Liz: they can call me mama
Liz: i just want to bangbangbang
Me: There is a list of things men with women knew about, and one of them was, "Don't rub the lamp if you don't want the genie to come out"
Sara (enthusiastically, misunderstanding the innuendo): THAT IS SO TRUE!
Ker: ummm, Sara...Please tell me when has rubbing a lamp actually resulted in a genie popping out for you?
Auto Response from Kerensa:
Sara: (in an I'm so clever" voice) So, uh, guys, would you rather be with a guy who has four balls or... (dramatic pause) ...two?
Kerensa: would you rather be with a guy who had one huge monster ball or a guy who had 20 small balls?
Liz: Then it would be like one big boob
Me: OK, so what if balls had nipples?
Sara: would the 20 balls be in one blob or...
Liz: or would they be like a string of balls?
Me: Like a string of Christmas lights?
Liz: Yeah! Except balls.
Me: thatwould be the worst christmas of my life