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| June 3rd, 2001 ~ 12:13am Astounded - Bran Van 3000 I realise that it's been awhile, but it doesn't seem as though anyone's been visiting anyway. I've been feeling pretty rotten as of late, and i thought i'd take the opportunity to update this heap of shit. Let me start off with a very basic breakdown of a super May long weekend in Muskoka! A couple of friends and i drove up north, and i enjoyed (a lot of) tequila. When i get the pics back, i'll consider getting some of them onto the site - if anyone's interested. The cottage belonged to a friend's friend...and it was on an island! It was a little tense at first, since i didn't actually know the people that were there already, but it turned out okay. Only one problem surfaced. (there had to be one!) A little background info: The friends that i went up with, were previously engaged (yes, to be married), and aren't really together anymore. Needless to say, they still act like a couple. Even though they aren't. Sickening really. Anyway, the guy and i have become reasonably good friends, and i can honestly say that i have never been attracted to him. Plus the fact that i would never betray my gal-pal of 5 years. This is why it was very disgusting to be hit on by this fellow when my friend wasn't around. It was a few weeks ago, and it hasn't been on my mind, so i'd rather not get into the how and why of it... I haven't really been in contact with either of them since that weekend though, for no other reason than being busy and tired, of course. Bleh. I wasn't impressed. What else? I had an amazing dinner last night at East Side Mario's bar 'n restaurant! For anyone that knows of it, i highly recommend: Their specialty: Hell's Kitchen Chicken on angel hair pasta, and the Brownie Decadance... oh and of course, the lime margarita. Yum! Later on in the eve, i saw a bad movie called "Nurse Betty". It starred Renee Zellwegger, Chris Rock, Morgan Freeman and Greg Kinnear. Despite the all-star cast, i thought the main premise was a load of crap. The writing wasn't particularly funny, and it lacked... substance? I just thought that it was a waste of 110 minutes. It was too long, for the amount of bad dialogue that was delivered. The main idea is that this small town waitress that's addicted to watching a hospital drama/ soap opera, witnesses her husband's murder after watching an episode. Soon after this, she becomes "delerious", believing that she is a character from the tv show, and flees town in search of her "ex-financee", which happens to be a character from that soap opera. She meets with him (yeah right!)... all the while, being chased across the country by the killers (Rock, Freeman). Blah blah... then at the end, she snaps out of it, and ends up getting a small part on the show. OH MY GOD. yep! I've been keeping in touch with Hotstuff, as much as i can. Blah. Nothing new to say about that. Apparently, he saw Pearl Harbour, and got all depressed (and not because of the BOMBS...just the love story i think). Oh dear, i feel like smacking that child. The Cute American's been keeping me at arm's length, and we aren't really keeping in touch aside from the infrequent online chats.... We had our first Frosh Leedur Orientation meeting last week. It was a waste of time - we had to sign waivers, agreeing that we wouldn't engage in any sexual activity, or deviant behaviour with the first year students during those 3 days. I signed it, reluctantly. : ) bahaha. I saw The Cute American there, and pretended that i didn't. Wow, i'm smooth. Not really. He came over and tapped my shoulder as he was leaving ...i got a smile 'n wave, but there wasn't any convo. Hum, i should really stop resorting to him as a Plan B. It's desparation! On another note, I've been sensing an ensuing involvement with that guy from work (again). Yes, the older one. I know it's a bad idea, but he's just fun to flirt with...when we went out last year, i had a lot of fun! I just couldnt handle it then. I don't want a relationship, obviously; but it's not like i want to fool around with him either. That is, i'm not a whore. I'm just lonely right now, and i'm craving the attention. I feel really alone. Not to mention, a friend of mine that works at Tim Horton's, spotted an ex-friend of mine with her boyfriend a few days ago. We haven't really been friends since we went to Cuba 2 years ago, and she discovered "guys", and "boyfriends"...she hasn't been without one ever since. I admitted to this friend of mine, last night, that i was really envious. It made me sick - it overwhelmed me. Then it all passed, of course. Although, i couldn't help thinking....what's wrong with me?! I think that having all of this free time, is getting the better of me. I know that i wouldnt be thinking about it as much if i was in school... there wouldnt be time for thinking this nonsense, let alone actually having any relationships... and that's the truth. I just miss the "companionship" ahhaa... it makes me think of last summer with Outback Jack. Then i have to force myself to remember all of the reasons that it IS in fact over. I'm making myself really sick now. I'm feeling rather desperate, at the moment. Other than all of that, i'm enjoying driving the Honda around, and listening to what the radio tells me is on the "charts". I like that new Sugar Ray song though...i discovered that, via the music video, not over the radio. : ) I think i'm gunna head to the gym tomorrow, since i'm not working. This weekend was just a couple of days to wallow in my own crapulence and take it out on my parents, and blame it on my mom's nagging.... rather than actual relaxation. No more stupidity! Now that i've gone thru it all, it seems so insignificant. Or that's what i'm trying to make myself believe. There are more important things in life to worry about...right? "and are you lonely...looking for yourself out there?" Drops of Jupiter, by Train....it's a great song. : ) |
| June 10th, 2001 - 3:47pm Semi-Charmed Life - Third Eye Blind Sunday afternoon, and i'm bored. I was really busy yesterday, so i think i'm still recovering. After being at work all morning, my friend 'n I headed downtown T.O. to do some shopping. We took a 25 minute streetcar ride to The Beaches, and spent a lot of the day wandering around there. It wasn't particularly fascinating. It WAS crowded though - annoyingly so. Damn people. We stumbled into a candy store, which was full of little brats and their moronic mothers - AND strollers filling the aisles with screaming babies. One "family" that we saw, was quite savage. Each of the 4 (or more!) kids had their own candy bags, and they were shovelling candy into them...when they weren't busy shoving licorice into their mouths, of course. Anyway, when they went back to the "mother" who'd given them this task to obviously shut the whining squirts up, she told them that they had too much, and would have to put some back. This is when i noticed the slimey handed children handling their gumballs and chewy things with their paws and dropping them back into the bins - the trashy mother, quite aware of what was going on. We, and several other customers watched in amazement as the screaming and whining continued... oh, the horror! Get outta here with your stupid kids, BITCH! I couldn't believe it! ...well i could, actually, but it didn't make the events any more acceptable. I just wanted to smack that mother. Savage. It's times like those, that i think that i really don't want kids of my own! Anyway. Most of the stores that we went into carried designer clothes, and there weren't any dresses with a pricetag showing less than $115. No thanks! We eventually made it back to the downtown area, and spent the next 2 hours in the Eaton Centre, where i was able to pick up a couple of shirts. Woo! Life's getting a little to exciting for me. Oh, another thing that was really damn annoying, were the people walking on the sidewalks. Not only were they strolling at an incredibely tiresome pace, but they were walking side by side. If you're going to take your goddamn sweet 'ole time, at least have the courtesy to let fellow civilians pass!! Fuksakes. People really piss me off. Wow...I just began to fume! I think it was the combination of the stupid people, as well as being told to get of the internet. Yes we have dial up. Fucking dial up! Fuck the people trying to call! Right now, i'm really looking forward to 10pm tonight. Why? Because The Practice is on. How sad is that. Oh well. At this point, life doesnt get anymore exciting than that. Oh yeah, so i'll get back to what happened last night. We eventually decided that it was time for dinner and it was time to pick a place to sit down at. I wanted to watch the hockey game, so we went to East Side Mario's again (downtown). The food was mighty bad, although, my margarita was verry yummy. Tequila is a great idea. OH! Another thing i saw at that candy store, was a tequila lolipop, with a REAL worm in it (!?!). Guh! (I picked up some margarita jelly beans -Jelly Belly). Yay! They're not very good. To add to the CRAP i ate all day, i finished up the evening with a visit to the new Cinabon store at Union Train Station. They have these new "cinnamon sticks" - 5 for $2.50. What a ripoff. The minibon's are $2, so i don't think any of that shit's cheap. Oh, the idiot cashier also ripped me off...it's my own fault for not looking at the change when it was first handed to me, but she game me like..80 cents back for a $5.00 bill (the total was 3 something). Fucking idiot. What? You can't speak english either? You're unnecessarily slow and tedious? I've been in line for 3 minutes? There's only one person in front of me? UGHHH!!! EVER HEARD OF CUSTOMER SERVICE?! Pick up the goddamn pace! You're working in a TRAIN STATION! People are on SCHEDULES! HURRY UP, you stupid bitch! Anyway, on that note, i will head to the tv to watch that episode of Buffy i taped 2 weeks ago. I bet someone taped over it. 7:42pm surprise, surprise! I received an unexpected phone call (long distance, of course) from ...Hotstuff!! It was sweet...we talked for quite a while, and i must say... i'm not feeling so full of "angst" hehehe! Hurrah : ) |
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