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| "Any Canadian film is obscure." - Tom McCamus, 2002 |
| Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen (2004) This movie is about a girl, Mary (Lindsay Lohan), who moves from New York to New Jersey with her Mom and two sisters. Mary decides to start a new life because no one knows her, and she wants to become someone - an actress. She decides to change her name to Lola. Mary / Lola is a big fan of Stu Wolfe (Adam Garcia) who she thinks is "the greatest poet since Shakespeare". Stu is the lead singer of the band Sid Arthur. You know how teeny girls get when they have a favourite band or singer? Well, Mary / Lola is no ordinary fan - she's the band's biggest fan ever! This doesn't sound like it's important to the movie, but it is, and it's tiresome. In the course of the film, Mary befriends another Sid Arthur fan, Ella (Alison Pill), and their devoted following of Sid Arthur gets them in a lot of trouble. What is interesting about the movie is how Mary / Lola lies about her life before New Jersey. She tells her friends that her Dad (Tom McCamus) died, just to have the stage for herself. The big news of the movie is that Sid Arthur are going to split up. Sense the feel-good vibe coming up? Not yet? Read on. Mary and Ella decide to go to New York to see the band's last concert. Mary's Dad, who turns out not to be dead after all, has tickets, but Mary thinks it would be "uncool" to go with a parent. She decides that they can bluff their way into the concert instead. Predictably, they can't get in, and it starts to rain while they're all dressed up. Drama! Meanwhile, Mary's very cool Dad is following them around with a huge dog. Ella thinks that he's a stalker. Time for Mary to confess that her Dad isn't really dead after all. Drama! While Mary and Ella are wandering the streets of New York, they come across a very drunk Stu. They feed him coffee and try to make him sober. He's so grateful that he invites them to the Sid Arthur farewell party. Mary and Ella are so happy - they will finally be cool and hip! Of course, Mary's "uncool" Dad is also at the party, and Stu is fascinated by the dog. Mary calls Stu a drunk. All of course ends happily, with a school musical, romance, and events to make the school bitch jealous of Mary. To be honest, I hated the movie. Tom and the dog (Negus in the movie; Zoe in real life) upstaged every other actor in the film. Sure, I'm a huge fan of Tom, and you'd think that I'm saying this because I'm a fan - but it's the truth. When you've seen one teen movie, you've seen them all, and this one is just like any other. - Anita van Schalkwijk |
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