Before we went up there, we met some folks from Chattanooga that were interested in ghost-hunting and they seemed really cool.
Last night, we went to the Kennesaw National Battlefield in Kennessaw, GA and froze our asses off, it is so unseasonably cold in Atlanta. Since I mentioned Atlanta, screw the Braves. They suck and don't deserve to win the world series. After giving up a 1-0 lead in the 8th inning they deserve to lose every other game they play.
Right now, I just finished checking my email and stuff and am totally tired, I have to be up in a few hours, and as sporatic as this entry sounded, right now, I really don't care. good night everyone, as always, I hope for a better tomorrow, even if tomorrow never comes.
All I need is a little indulgence, yet, the hunter just ends up becoming the hunted.
I put so much hope in things, every time I am given a chance, I hope and pray that it is the one I have been waiting for, to no avail. And for you people out there who think I do nothing but feel sorry for myself, fuck you. If you had to live my life, and be subjected to my feelings day after day, you wouldnt feel to good about yourself either. SIGH
Im sorry. What do you do when you dont know what to do? I try so hard to be happy, I look for happiness everywhere, I try so hard, yet it seems that it does about as much good as trying to stop a fire with the moisture from a kiss. A kiss, that is a memory that escapes me.
Anyway, I still try.
And I hear them saying, youll never change things, and no matter what you do its still the same thing, but its not the world that I am changing, I do this so this world will know that it will not change me.
I may get hurt along the way, God knows I have enough tears to prove it, but I'm still here, I guess that counts for something.
I believe that love and mercy still exist, while all the hatreds rage and so many say that love is all but pointless in madness such as this, everyone makes it out to be like wispering a prayer in the fury of a storm.
But I don't think so. As long as one heart still holds on, then hope is never really gone. I do hold on. Though I'm not sure how much longer I can.
No one called tonight, even after I waited, just like yesterday, for the phone to ring. So I'll go to bed, and meet him in my dreams, which may very well be the only place I ever do.
Goodnight.
oh yeah, I guess I got my wish. The Braves lost the world series without winning even one game. Screw the braves.
I have so many problems with everything today, and then I realize that several of the few people that I actually care about, really don't care about me.
Anything else? Must I ask. WHY CANT PEOPLE JUST LEAVE ME ALONE!
I wanna go home. I wanna go somewhere. I don't care where, just away from all of this, but that place doesn't exist. It never exists. sigh. I am gonna go watch a movie, alone. later maybe...
Is there nothing in this world to combat my boredom and lonliness. Lets see what is it he said again "I really want to talk to you..." In one of the three emails I have gotten in the past 4 days during which I havent heard from him. Or anyone else for that matter. I am beginning to wonder if there ever is a point. And if it would be worth it if there was. Screw this "he said, she said" drama. I need a new life. Or an abrubt end. Whichever is easiest. NO, I am not suicidal, it was just a figure of speech. Anyway, back to my lonley reality....
