The "BIG SPIN" Awards

Celebrating Those Who Spin The Truth
And Make People Believe It

Tonight, from deep within the bowels of hell, we give a Lifetime Achievement Award to the one who has been the most creative liar and affected the most people.

The nominating committee had a tough time narrowing the field down to three prospects, but they finally agreed on these individuals listed in no particular order:

The Fib From Outer Space (of Veggie Tales fame)

The Big Bad Wolf (of Little Red Riding Hood fame)

and Satan (of our Boss fame)

The votes have been tallied and we have a winner. May I have the envelope please.

(drum roll - rat a tata tata tata tata tata tata tata tata tat - and so forth . . .)

Alrighty (opening envelope) - coming in at 2nd place is . . .

The Fib From Outer Space!

(Woo hoo - applause and whistles from demon audience. Fib stands and takes a bow.)

And now . . .

the winner . . .

of the "Big Spin" Lifetime Achievement Award goes to . . .

you guessed it . . .

Satan!

(More applause erupts and whistles sing forth in praise. Celebratorial music commences. Audience comes to their feet.)

Now Satan . . . or Lucifer, or Beelzebub, or Prince of Darkness . . . or whatever name he is using at the moment, couldn't make it here to be with us this evening.

(collective "Awww" from audience)

I know, I know (raising hands). But you know him, he's always got the nose to the grindstone and busy with work (collective nodding of heads within audience).

Actually I even called him a workaholic once. He reacted by supernaturally creating a spinning grindstone in front of me. He then pushed my face on it - grinding my nose off.

(Audience laughs)

Yes, he certainly does have a unique sense of humor. And to showcase this great funny bone of his, we have put together a chart detailing his greatest lie ever - "naturalistic evolution".

Below is a chart comparing the contradicting conclusions between naturalistic evolution and creation. As you compare the two, you will see just how humorous it is that people believe something that is the exact opposite of the truth . . .

Naturalistic Evolution

Creation

There is no God	There is a God
Man created God	God created man
There is nothing outside of nature	There is something outside of nature (supernatural)
Universe is self-existing	God created the universe
Matter progresses to greater complexity	Matter is in a state of decay
Life started out simple	Life started out complex
Organs partially developed at some stages	Organs irreducibly complex
Animals evolve from one kind into another	Life created and bounded in kinds
Life progressing towards perfection	Life descending from perfection
We are cosmic accidents	We are designed and created
Humans formed over vast amounts of time	Humans created instantly
Humans just complex animals	Humans separate from animals
We come from the sea	We were created from the dust of the earth
Genetic code formed by random-chance processes	Genetic code programmed by Willful direction
Some people more highly evolved than others	All people created equal
Human behavior dictated by outside stimuli (no free will)	Humans are acting moral agents (free will)
Humans basically good (or born a clean slate) and corrupted by external forces	Humans born with an inner sinful nature
We don't have a soul	We do have a soul
Man makes the moral rules	God makes the moral rules
There is no afterlife (just loss of consciousness)	There is an afterlife (a continuation of consciousness)
There is no absolute judgment or consequences for actions	There is absolute judgment and consequences for actions
There is no ultimate hope	There is ultimate hope
No ultimate meaning to life	God has a special plan for you

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