I Wish I Was A Girl
"For all the things I'm losing, I might as well resign myself
to try and make a change"

If the title "Amy Hit's the Atmosphere" brought up visions of coolness and excitement in my mind, the same cannot be said about this song. I'm sure the reaction was the same for many people when Adam Duritz first revealed the song list for "This Desert Life". "I Wish I Was A Girl" left me scratching my head....

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In the same way that "Speedway" is in a way connected to "Mercury", for more obvious reasons, "IWIWAG" continues the story of Elisabeth from "Goodnight Elisabeth"....only this time she's referred to as "Elizabeth".....but doubters sit down, it has been confirmed that despite the different spellings, they are one and the same person. For those of you not familiar with THIS story (this is getting to be a familiar phrase in all my writings) Elisabeth was Adam Duritz's girlfriend when he went out on tour for "August and Everything After" (I could be wrong...but I'm pretty sure). Anyway, that didn't work out because she couldn't believe that Adam was being faithful to her on the road. She had these ideas in her head that he was just messing around night after night. So to make a long story short...things didn't work out.

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In some ways it's a rather sad song, going on about how many times Elisabeth's dreams were constantly bothered by her insecurities. It's not an easy situation to be in for either party. I mean, what can you say to a person who refuses to believe anything you say? It's not Elisabeth's fault either...I mean, some people really are insecure and need that extra comfort and reassurance. We also can't really 'peg' her down either since we hardly know the 'whole story'.

The real touching part though comes in the chorus when Adam sings "I wish for all the world that i could say hey Elizabeth, you know, I'm doing ok". Elizabeth is doing fine...she's moved on and married. But what about Adam? Through all they put each other through, he still has the desire to make ammends...to make things better between the two of them, or he wouldn't have written this song right?

My favorite part though has got to be the bridge: Adam comes to terms with the fact that they were destined just not to work out, that they were just too different and decisions they made in their lives (he decided to tour, she decided to stay) simply made things impossible to stay together. "In one of these dreams, you forgive me....." And he wishes that she has come to realize the same thing.

Right now however, these things he wishes for just can't come true...that's the real sad part of this whole thing. He still can't say "he's ok" and he's still bothered by the whole thing. But the desire is there, the need to reconcile is there, you can feel it up to the very end where he just bites into you with the way he sings "i can't sleep at night' with so much pain and emotion.

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The song is about trust...gaining one's trust. It really doesn't have any sexual connotation or any desire to 'come out'. It really is such a bold statement made by 'a guy'. His desire to be believed is SO STRONG that he'd do anything, wish for anything...even as drastic as well....being a girl, just so that he can ease Elizabeth's mind, ease her worries, get here forgiveness, it's a very admirable and noble thing to wish for. So the next time you end up cringing at the mention of this title..think of that, makes the song a lot better.

Oh, did I forget to mention that aside from all that, "I Wish I Was A Girl" is a real great song in itself?