MOVIE MOVIE Page!!
R thru Z (if there were any! lol)
Basically, 1 is bad, 5 is good. (Rating system at bottom.)
Quick reference:
Go to A-I or J-P
"RAIDERS OF THE LOST ARK" (PG) Stars: Harrison Ford
I like this movie. It's pretty interesting, has a cool ending (I do usually skip what happens when they open the Lost Ark of the Covenant), and Harrison Ford is Indiana Jones and he looks good! lol I think it's worth seeing, as it's one of the first great action films! (Check out that rolling boulder scene at the beginning!) If you like non-stop action, this is for you. There's some sex and a lot of violence. Rating: ****
"RAT RACE" (PG-13; 2001) Stars: John Cleese, Whoopi Goldberg, Seth Green, Breckin Meyer, Amy Smart, Jon Lovitz
This movie made me laugh harder than anything has in a long time. I wanted to see it pretty much just for Seth Green, because he's always funny, but it does have an incredible cast, and they're all very funny. See it. Rating: ***1/2
"REMEMBER THE TITANS" (PG) Stars: Denzel Washington
People that know me at all know that I am unimpressed by supposed "inspirational movies". This is one of them, and yes, it is a very good movie, as most "the i word" movies are. I love Denzel Washington, although this isn't my favorite character for him. This movie portrays the racial integration of the high schools very well. It's accurate to a point, anyway. The movie focuses more on how that affected a select high school's football team, so I'll give them that (you certain wouldn't be able to tell from this movie how many schools actually just carted in one black student and considered themselves integrated, but that wasn't the point). Obviously, the racial conflict makes for some dramatic content, but this is a pretty clean movie. There is an incident of male/male kissing that's a little odd but not sensual. Rating: *** (if you like the type)
"RETURN TO ME" (PG; 2000) Stars: David Duchovny, Minnie Driver, Carroll O'Connor
THere are some cute things about this movie, but the plotline is pretty thin. Plus, it's one of those movies that you forget immediately after watching. Carroll O'Connor (and his friends) was the best thing about it, and Bonnie Hunt, as always, was great as the best friend. There's some language and very light sensuality, and I guess I can kind of understand some people's attraction to David Duchovny. Rating: ** 1/2
"THE ROAD TO EL DORADO" (PG; 2000) Stars: the voices of Kenneth Branagh, Kevin Kline, Rosie Perez
This movie would have been VERY cute except for this small part that absolutely has no place in the story where the high priest dude uses a potion to make some weird "rock Jaguar" (getting the picture of how STRANGE it was?). The music is good, there's some fun, unpredictable humor that had ME laughing out loud... anyway, it's good, and it moves quickly, but they kind of started loosing it towards the end. Plus, the cartoon-nudity (male bottoms) and a little mild language was NOT necessary.
"ROBIN HOOD: PRINCE OF THIEVES" (PG-13; 1991) Stars: Kevin Costner, Morgan Freeman, Christian Slater
This movie might have all the packaging of a real COOL flick, but frankly, the cartoon is better entertainment. Or check out the much-deserved farce, "Robin Hood: Men in Tights" instead. Kevin Costner is all wrong for the role, first of all, at least in my opinion. And who the heck IS this Azeem (played by Morgan Freeman..okay, so at least he can act) guy? I've seen every version of Robin Hood like ever made and read the book as well and I definitely DON'T recall him in anything. Anyway, there are a lot of loose ends in this movie, and it's a little boring as well. The best thing about it was Sean Connery's cameo (unfortunately, the wedding scene was already cheesy beyond repair)...or, the appropriately disgusting forced-marriage/quick "wedding night" (near rape) scene, the only part of the movie that had a real sense of humor. Rating: **
"ROMANCING THE STONE" (PG) Stars: Michael Douglas, Kathleen Turner, Danny DeVito
This is one of my long- time favorites. My mother just informed me that the woman as she is in the beginning of this movie is too much like what I could become...except I'd have a computer for her typewriter and oh, probably more than one cat. LOL But hey, she doesn't stay that way. She goes off into the jungle on a treasure hunt to save her sister from ruthless kidnappers (my sister in the hands of kidnappers? Hmmm...) and meets a wild man after her money. There's a lot of sex and language and violence as well. Rating: ***
"ROMEO AND JULIET" (PG; 1968 -i know i know, it shouldn't be here!) Stars: Olivia Hussey, Leonardo Whiting
This is an older version of "Romeo & Juliet" but it's really good. There's a little sex, quite a bit of violence. The theme song in this movie is really neat, actually. Hopefully, you know the story. If you're hoping for something a little more than gangs running the modern streets still speaking Elizabethan English (see my review for "William Shakespeare's Romeo + Juliet"), this is the movie for you. Rating: ***
"ROXANNE" (PG) Stars: Steve Martin, Daryl Hannah
Steve Martin is truly great in this movie, and I love the story. I would have given it a PG-13 rating, though, I think, because there's a lot of language and sexual innuendo. It's not really appropriate for family viewing, which is too bad, because it's really funny. Rating: ***
"RUNAWAY BRIDE" (PG; 1999) Stars: Julia Roberts, Richard Gere
I love these two, and especially together! This movie has the same actors and director as were in "PRETTY WOMAN"...but a better rating! lol This was a really sweet movie. A total romance, maybe a little fluff. But I personally thought it had a good lesson in there. Julia Roberts plays a woman who dumps her fiances at the alter...on SEVERAL occasions...and Richard Gere is the journalist who ticks her off by writing about her without all the facts. It's really clean too, except for like one part with sexual references. (Naughty grandmother.) There are some really cute parts, as well as some parts that probably could have been better! See it and enjoy it! Rating: ****
"SABRINA" (PG; 1995) Stars: Harrison Ford, Julia Ormond
This is a neat movie, too. Of course, I'm kind of partial to it because I liked the original "Sabrina" movie with Audrey Hepburn (yes I love oldies too!), but I like this one even better. It's about a daughter of a rich family's chauffeur that falls in love with the wealthy playboy son. Humor, good characters, very little sexual content, and Harrison Ford (even though he doesn't look his best..on purpose..lol)! There is some bad language. Rating: ****
"SANTA WHO?" (TV-PG; 2001) Stars: Leslie Nielsen
Got a new Christmas movie for you! This one is actually better than the average Disney Christmas flick. I think it'll get the lofty distinction of being on our family Christmas list (you know, the list of movies we watch twice a year..in July, and in December). Rating: ** 1/2
"SAY ANYTHING" (PG-13; 1989) Stars: John Cusack, John Mahoney
I was never really into John Cusack's arc of real "chick flicks", but apparently he was pretty big for a time there. Unfortunately, I find most of these movies pretty much follow the same formula, kind of like a string of old Fred & Ginger movies -the story worked, so all they do is change the names and situations a little and they have a whole new blockbuster-apparent. This movie, for instance, is very similar to 1985's The Sure Thing (with Daphne Zuniga bearing a noticeable resemblance to this movie's Ione Skye in personality as well as appearance). But then, I've never had a real strong belief in Cameron Crowe's writing ability. Anyway, this movie isn't bad in that it's a strong love story and there are some interesting themes and one-liners. If you like John Cusack or simple mush-films, go for it. Rating: ***
"SAVE THE LAST DANCE" (PG-13; 2000) Stars: Julia Stiles, Sean Patrick Thomas
Well, I like Julia Stiles, and the story and romance in this movie wasn't bad. I just didn't get really into it is all, I don't know why. It was interesting, but there weren't any really exciting parts. Anyway, it's still a good movie to check out. I admit, most MTV movies are well-thought-out flicks. This one is cool because they don't wind everything up at the end. No, not loose endings, just a statement that life is ongoing. The stories don't just end. That was cool. There's lots of language, gang-type violence as well as the usual variety of the same. Rating: ***
"SCOOBY-DOO" (PG; 2002) Stars: Freddie Prinze Jr., Sarah Michelle Gellar, Linda Cardellini, Matthew Lillard
Worst movie I've had the misfortune of seeing voluntarily. Even as as kids' movie, it stinks: there's a severe lack of decent (or actual) laughs, and it's not at all worth the bad influence. Rating: *
"SEE JANE DATE" (2003) Stars: Charisma Carpenter, Holly Marie Combs
As someone who watched Charisma play Cordy for a few too many years, the first thing I approved of in this movie was her hair. It's brown, and looks *good* again (phew). It's good to see her playing a different part, plus it's actually a decent movie -with the feel of a romantic comedy, but honestly atypical. Then there's Holly Marie Combs, who I always thought had the most promise but was the least appreciated of the sisters on Charmed. Plus there's Antonio Sabato Jr., among other cameos, who is hella cute. This flick is a little better than the average made-for-TV movie. Rating: ***
"SEEMS LIKE OLD TIMES" (PG) Stars: Chevy Chase, Goldie Hawn
This is a really cute movie, that is if you like the borderline-slapstick stuff (and my family does -and slapstick for that matter- so I see a lot of these kinds of movies!). Chevy Chase is almost always that way, and well, Goldie Hawn is...Goldie Hawn. They're good together, though. This is about a female attorney who's ex-husband, who was framed for a bankrobbery, comes to her to ask her to defend him against her current D.A. hubby. The end is great. There's some language and some sexual references as well. Rating: ***
"SERENDIPITY" (PG-13; 2001) Stars: John Cusack, Kate Beckinsale, Molly Shannon, Jeremy Piven
Truth is, I'm really tired of romantic comedies. They're so trite, and this one is the epitome of trite romantic comedies. That doesn't make it bad. If you like the genre, this is a decent one. The supporting characters are fun, always a bonus. Towards the end it even started making me think of Sleepless in Seattle. And hey, I'm slightly partial to the name (we had a cat named Serendipity once). There's a very small amount of badness here. Very little sexual innundo or language, some homosexual innuendo. Rating: ***
"SERVING SARA" (PG-13; 2002) Stars: Matthew Perry, Elizabeth Hurley
The first half of this movie was promising, but the laughs in second half just ended up being uncomfortable. Elizabeth Hurley didn't play off of Matthew Perry (who I love) well at *all* -either that, or she's a terrible actress, but I've never thought that about her before (likely she just can't handle comedy). The resolution was ridiculous and the characters wound up boring. Harsh language, numerous sexual jokes. There's also inappropriate impotent bull humour that went on *way* too long. Rating: **
"SHALLOW HAL" (PG-13; 2002) Stars: Jack Black, Gwyneth Paltrow
This is not a gross-out comedy. Let's just get that said right off. It's also not about lovin' "big ladies". It is cute, and has some sweet thoughts, and the theme is original, so it's automatically a cut above most romantic comedies. I actually like Gwyneth Paltrow in this movie. She should do more of these parts. Jack Black is supposed to be hilarious, but he starts it off annoying, and I wasn't sure I liked him carrying the movie all by himself (well, him and Jason Alexander) for the first 20 minutes. Not life-changing, but it's a good theory. (There's sexual content and language.) Rating: ***
"SHANGHAI NOON" (PG-13) Stars: Jackie Chan, Lucy Lui
Just a warning, there's not a lot of Lucy Lui in this movie. It's not REALLY a romance. It's probably my favorite Jackie Chan movie, though. There were some REALLY funny parts. I even laughed out loud. See it, enjoy it. There's sexual content, violence, language. Rating: ***
"SHE'S ALL THAT" (PG-13) Stars: Freddie Prinze Jr, Rachael Leigh Cook
Very shallow teen High School flick. There's not a whole lot of plot to speak of, not a whole lot of cute parts either, and not even much chemistry between the two leading characters. And if you can't see the beautiful girl underneath the glasses and baggy clothes Rachael's character plays is wearing in the beginning, maybe YOU need the glasses. This flick was mostly a vehicle for launching the career of Freddie Prinze Jr. Just some trivia, this movie was filmed at the high school set used for the TV show Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Sarah Michelle Gellar makes a silent cameo appearance. Rating: **1/2
"SHORT CIRCUIT" (PG) Stars: Steve Guttenberg
If you haven't heard of this movie, I feel sorry for you. Really. lol This movie is about this robot that escapes it's military base and supposedly starts "feeling" emotion after it's hit by lightning. "His" inventor (Guttenberg) is a good guy (though he's been living in a lab too long) too and he tries to help the robot before the more ruthless men he's working with find him and re-program him. This girl on the "outside" is trying to help to, since the robot stumbles into her first. Yeah, it sounds stupid, but it's actually pretty cute. There are some great lines. There's a whole lot of language and some sexual references. Rating: ***
"SHREK" (PG; 2001)
Okay, the hype is right, this is a funny movie. It subtly makes fun of just about everything, it's accessible to all ages, there's good music, even. There are a couple parts I thought were a little TOO bizarre (the bird blows up? and that's funny BECAUSE...?) but nothing too major, I guess. (I admit, for some reason I was comparing it to The Emperor's New Groove in my mind and I would probably prefer The Emperor.. but whatever.) Very worth seeing. Rating: ****
"SIGNS" (PG-13; 2002) Stars: Mel Gibson, Joaquim Phoenix
This was a freaky movie. What was I doing watching it? It was also quite well done. I felt there were a few elements that didn't completely come together, and the Mel Gibson character's big "crisis of faith" seemed very shallow to me (though realistic, unfortunately). Somehow I thought this movie was kind of an intellectual suspense, but it's not -there's actually more action than I expected. The music score, in particular, deserves praise, and I love the credits. It really sets the scene for the movie, and gives it a definite Hitchcock feel. There is language, violence, and don't watch it if you have a bad heart, ok? Rating: ***
"SIMPLY IRRESISTABLE" (PG-13) Stars: Sarah Michelle Gellar
Okay, if you watch this movie, don't stop it after the first 5 minutes, because you'll miss something special. That's just a warning that you will probably start out thinking this movie is totally retarded. I did! It really grew on me though. It was sort of like a fairy tale, only without the cliches. VERY hard to describe. You will either love it or hate it. You have to just take it as a whole and enjoy it. Don't try to analyse! Great movie, and very wholesome. Didn't deserve the PG-13 rating AT ALL. There's only one scene with any sexual references. Rating: **
"SIX DAYS, SEVEN NIGHTS" (PG-13) Stars: Harrison Ford, Anne Heche
Well, yes, I love Harrison Ford! Even though he was cuter in Indiana Jones and Star Wars than now...SORRY Harrison! lol This is a great movie. Harrison Ford plays that scoundrel-like character that we all love him for in this movie, and besides, it's about being stranded on a deserted island! (Isn't that a classic story we all love? AND with Harrison Ford? How can you get any better? lol) Half of this movie is hilarious, and the other half is kinda dramatic, but it never takes itself too seriously. There is some language and a little violence, and a lot of sexual references and implications. Rating: ****
"THE SIXTH SENSE" (PG-13) Stars: Bruce Willis, the kid everybody is so wild about now Haley Joel Osmond (Osmonte? I'll have to look that up...)
Dark, intense movie. Good actors. Yes, it does have a surprise ending unless you've already heard about it by now (I had). If you like paranormal thriller-type movies with "deeper meanings" hidden in the framework, you'll probably enjoy this. Otherwise, ignore the hype and don't bother. Rating: ** 1/2
"THE SKULLS" (PG-13) Stars: Joshua Jackson, Leslie Bibb, Paul Walker
Did you think the ads looked creepy? Well, they told the truth for once. The only thing they were a little misleading about was the level of action adventure in this movie. I'd say it was more of an "intellectual battle" movie, although it did have it's share of fight scenes (with a twist). I can tell you now, if I ever considered joining a "secret sorority" type group at any college, I am now convinced of the error of my ways! lol There's sexual content, violence, language, murder. Rating: **
"SLEEPLESS IN SEATTLE" (PG) Stars: Tom Hanks, Meg Ryan (with long hair!)
Another cool movie! Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan are just..great together. Really. And the music! Rockin' oldies, the kind you don't hear that often! Meg falls in love with a guy she's never met, Tom thinks she lives too far away, his cute little boy has other ideas! Watch it and find out! Rating: **** (I'd tell you not to miss it but you'll either love it or think it's incredibly boring!)
"SLIDING DOORS" (PG-13) Stars: Gwenyeth Paltrow, a couple guys that aren't that cute..lol: John Lynch and John Hannah, Jeanne Tripplehorn
I'd always wanted to see this movie and I finally did and it was SO WEIRD! lol Very different, if that's what you're looking for! It wasn't bad, just very odd. It showed the 2 ways one young woman's life could have gone, depending on if she caught the subway one day or not. You'll just have to see it to know how they manage that and how it turns out! Rating: ***1/2
"SMALL TIME CROOKS" (PG; 2000) Stars: Woody Allen, Tracey Ullman, Hugh Grant
I think I decided to watch this because Hugh Grant (has a small but important part) said something about it at the Golden Globes. How un-Alicia-like is THAT? Yah, well...Woody Allen has his own style, and it is NOT mine, but this movie has some cute parts. Not hilarious, but cute. Plus, the only "bad stuff" in it are brief references to Playboy magazine, topless dancing, divorce, and then the whole crime-as-a-career satire of course. Rating: **
"SNOW DAY" (PG; 2000) Stars: Chris Elliot, Mark Webber ...I dunno, a bunch of Nickelodeon people
The good thing about a Nickelodeon movie is that they like to be unusual. They do have some honest talent working for them. This was a decent, fairly funny, family movie; of course there were the usual "kids against the world" themes. There was some language and light (teen) relationship "banter". Rating: *** (families/kids)
"SOMEONE LIKE YOU" (PG-13; 2001) Stars: Ashley Judd, Greg Kinnear, Hugh Jackman, Marisa Tomei
This is a cute, not-unique movie. I'd have to say it's one of those date movies. It's all about love and learning in Manhattan, basically. There are some moderately funny "cutesy" effects, oh and Hugh Jackman's kinda cute! There's plenty of sexual innuendo, and language. Rating: ***
"SPEED 2" (PG-13) Stars: Sandra Bullock
Well, the best part is the interesting if unrealistic special effects of the boat crashing the village at the end. I think everybody knows that this sequel gave even sequels a bad name. I didn't even see the first "Speed" before I saw this one, so I didn't have any preconceptions about the characters, but anybody can see this movie is pretty shallow. The very beginning is kind of cute, and some of the action sequences might garner a little interest, but otherwise.... Rating: **
"SPIDER-MAN" (PG-13; 2002) Stars: Tobey Maguire, Kirsten Dunst, William Dafoe, James Franco
This was dorkier than I expected, but I think it tried to stay as close to the general attitude of the comics as possible. The action and CGI was less than I expected, as well, but I eventually got into the characters, and there's nothing that's bad about having good characters in this kind of movie. Quite frankly, I'd watch pretty much any superhero movie. Rating: ***1/2
"SPY KIDS" (PG; 2001) Stars: Antonio Banderas
Well, this movie was a bit different than I expected. It's definitely a kid's movie, although I was delighted by a CERTAIN cameo at the end..lol (I'd happily spoil the surprise, because I don't recommend watching it just for that, but I better not, just in case!) The ending was excellent (not just for the cameo, lol). By the way, it was a little better the second time around (even if I had to be forced into watching it), because you're used to the weird style by then. If that helps. lol Rating: **
"SPY KIDS 2" (PG; 2002) Stars: Antonio Banderas
Okay, first off, Antonio Banderas has ruined any appeal he ever had for me (which, okay, isn't a big loss, since he never really had any appeal for me...) but anyway. This movie is worse than the first one. Trust me. Although my little brothers had the opposite opinion. And, the part where they "kick each others butts"? I was *rolling on the floor*. Apparently, retired adult spies... are idiots. Are they sure they want this man in charge? Rating: *
"STEEL MAGNOLIAS" (PG; 1989) Stars: Sally Field, Dolly Parton, Julia Roberts, Dylan McDermott, Daryl Hannah, Shirley MacLaine, Olympia Dukakis, Tom Skeritt
Whew, what a cast, huh? And you know me, I only list the very basic: famous leads when I put my cast up there. I had heard so much about this movie I just had to watch it. It's kinda pointless and tragic, but it's not like it made me cry or anything. There were some really great one-liners, as a matter of fact (duh, look at the cast again...), and if you feel like seeing what the big deal is about, go ahead. I might even watch it again, cause it was kind of fun, but it's not exactly a classic in my mind. There's some language and sexual implications...character death. Rating: ***
"STEPMOM" (PG-13) Stars: Julia Roberts, Susan Sarendon, Ed Harris
As I'm sure you know, this movie was a big hit. I read some of the book based on it before I saw it, which was probably a mistake, but I really didn't like it all that much. Ed Harris, as the Father, isn't a very strong male figure, as he's caught between his ex-wife (they have 2 children, a boy and a girl) and his much younger live-in girl friend (Julia Roberts), who his ex and children hate, and who has a lot to learn about having a family. It ends bittersweet, and perhaps a tad unreal. It's a kind of sweet movie, however, and the kids are really cute! There's some language and the live-in situation but I wouldn't say it deserved the PG-13 rating unless you count the thematic elements (it deals with cancer and divorce) for so much. Rating: **
"STRICTLY BALLROOM" (PG) Stars: well, nobody i know, anyway...
I'm a bit of a fan of Baz Luhrmann, which is why I decided to check this movie out. I can see why it could become a cult classic for some, but it was just bizarre in my opinion. I wouldn't see it again. Rating: *1/2
"STUART LITTLE" (PG) Stars: the voice of Michael J. Fox, Jonathan Lipnicki
This one IS a family film. It's VERY unusual, and even sillier than it sounds (people adopting a mouse??) but it wasn't a big hit for nothing; there are some cute parts. The "evil cats" were the best part if you ask me (but then I'm one of those "bad-boy" gals...) and they were also where the PG rating came from; the "leader" spouted a little mild language. There was also some cartoon- quality violence, although NOBODY got hurt in the movie, not even the "bad guys", which is refreshing. And Jonathan Lipnicki (the kid) wasn't in it as much as I was afraid he was, PTL (I happen to SEVERLY dislike the kid okay). It's a good kids film, but it does kind of drag, and I wouldn't want to sit through it more than once...twice if pushed..and neither would any active kid. Maybe it's a little-girl's-movie. As for the rating, I'm going to stick it in the "animated" category, whether it belongs or not, and NOT rate it. Sorry!
"THE SUM OF ALL FEARS" (PG-13; 2002) Stars: Ben Affleck, Morgan Freeman
I don't like Jack Ryan movies. They tend to be rather boring, overall. There was one element to this movie that was interesting (I won't say what it was because it surprised me), but for the first hour it was easy to call it "retarded" and be annoyed with it. The plot was incredibly flimsy. That could have something to do with the villain change- from Islamic extremists to "Neo-Nazis" (or Russians, or bored millionaires, whatever it was really). I don't believe for a minute that Israel would be that careless, and that's only one plot point that I found utterly unbelieveable. Rating: *
"SWEET HOME ALABAMA" (PG-13; 2002) Stars: Reese Witherspoon, Josh Lucas, Patrick Dempsey, Candice Bergen, Ethan Embry
All romantic comedies are the same, when it comes right down to it. They act like finding love is the most important thing in the whole world and even if they bring up any other important issues they drop them completely when "true love wins out". Whatever version of true love they finally decide on. And it's not so common for one woman to have *two* great men totally in love with her and when she does, she should *appreciate it more*! Okay! So, understanding all that, yes, it's a good movie. Yes, I liked it. If for the song alone, dang it (even Jewel's version). There's some language, and an unnecessary sideplot involving homosexuality. Rating: ***1/2
"SWEET NOVEMBER" (PG-13; 2001) Stars: Keanu Reeves, Charlize Theron
I was far from interested in this movie when it came out. I don't like either of the stars, and the story looked (and is) pretty darn stupid. Hollie watched it just to see Michael Rosenbaum (he's in it for like 5 min), my aunt said she actually liked it, and since it was on, I ended up watching it myself. It was a little better than I expected, but I can definitely understand why a lot of people considered it one of the most forgettable movies of 2001. If you're a fan of Keanu or Charlize, however, have at it. There's fornication, transvestites/homosexuals, language. Rating: **1/2
"TARZAN" (G; 1999) Stars: the voices of Rosie O'Donnell, Minnie Driver, Glenn Close, Tony Goldwyn
Okay, this is an animated!! lol It's a good movie, quite a bit of action, and none of the magical/mystical stuff (or weird religion) that so many of the animated Disney movies have. There was quite a bit of implied violence, actually -- nothing graphic but you could tell what was going on! I loved Jane's character (voiced by Minnie Driver), she was quite well developed, but I think Tarzan was a bit UNDER developed, and as a lead character that doesn't help the movie any. They did push evolution a bit in this movie, and then, well, Tarzan is constantly wearing his loin cloth, not that that is portrayed sensually. I did think this movie lacked in substance matter a bit, but it is a pretty good movie and definitely no less wholesome than the other Disney animated movies! Enjoy it! =)
"10 THINGS I HATE ABOUT YOU" (PG-13) Stars: Julia Stiles, Heath Ledger
I couldn't resist reviewing this movie, it's one of my favorites! It's LOOSELY based on the Shakespeare story "The Taming of the Shrew"; it's about two sisters...one who wants to date, but can't, because her "old maid" sister refuses to, and supposed overprotective dad won't let one date without the other dating. So the guy who wants to date the younger sis, Bianca, hires another guy to date "the shrew", Kat (Kate in the book). Sound confusing? It really isn't. I really like the sister-sister relationship in this movie, as well. Of course, I happen to be able to relate to Kat in this movie....yikes! lol Okay, there is language, sex is discussed frequently and somewhat graphically, there are a few inappropriate images (thanks to one disgusting student), but the worst part is a couple of completely unnecessary scenes with the "Guidance Counselor" (who could use some guidence herself...) in the beginning, who writes porn in her free time. Rating: **** (watch out for all the garbage)
"TEACHING MRS. TINGLE" (PG-13; 1999) Stars: Katie Holmes, Barry Watson, Marissa Coughlan, Helen Mirren
This was a strange movie. It was far from realistic, for one thing, and the only thing it has going for it is the casting. Of course, the adorable Katie Holmes deserves notice, although this was far from her top performance. Marissa Coughlan, in a large supporting role, is very cute herself, and Barry Watson didn't even annoy me. Helen Mirren, as the dreaded teacher, Mrs. Tingle, delivered a flawless, if inscrutable, performance. This movie was about 3 student who threaten a teacher who wants to keep them from succeeding (in school, in their lives...whatever!). They keep her tied up to her bed for several days and she plays them off of each other and it's a big senseless mess, basically. There's a lot of sexual innuendo, as well as one moderately steamy scene and more than enough cleavage. Some violence, language. Rating: *
"THAT THING YOU DO" (PG) Stars: Tom Hanks, Liv Tyler
Cool movie, especially if you like the music of the "great rock-n-roll era". It's more a faux documentary than anything else, but it's kind of fun to watch. And it was like practically a one-man production by Tom Hanks, so you KNOW it's gotta be good, right? Rating: ***
"THE THREE MUSKETEERS" (PG) Stars: Chris O'Donnell, Charlie Sheen, Kiefer Sutherland, Oliver Platt
The like totally best 3 Musketeers version. (Yes I've read that book too and this movie doesn't stick to it any better than you would expect!) It's cute and funny and hey it's got Chris O'Donnell. Rating: ***
"THREE TO TANGO" (PG-13) Stars: Dylan McDermott, Matthew Perry, Neve Campbell
This was a really funny movie, but it has one serious problem: the whole concept is based on homosexuality. Everybody believes this guy (Perry) is gay (his co-worker actually IS gay by the way) and he basically ends up having to pretend that he IS to keep this important job. Unfortunately, he falls in love with his boss's girl friend. There are some great actors but obviously, a lot of sex and language. Rating: ***
"TITANIC" (PG-13; 1997) Stars: Leonardo DiCaprio, Kate Winslet, Billy Zane, Bill Paxton
Okay, I've avoided reviewing this movie because everybody's seen it and has their own view on it ALREADY, but whatever. It's this movie about a big boat that sinks, you know, but mostly it's about free love and "living for the moment", cause you never know when your ship might hit an iceburg and one of you will drown. The dialogue is NOT the best and the visual effects are cool the first couple times but then it's just...well, pick your word: retarded, funny, ridiculous, boring.... Anyway, the best reason to see it is because it's practically a cultural icon. No, it IS a cultural icon. This generation's Romeo & Juliet, practically. Rose & Jack. I hope you know about the nudity, sex, language, violence, etc. Rating: ***
"TITANIC" (PG-13; 1996) Stars: Catherine Zeta-Jones, Peter Gallagher, Tim Curry, Eva Marie Saint
I saw this version of "Titanic", which was on TV as a mini-series, during the same week I saw the more famous version. This one is like it in many ways, yet with a larger cast. Plus, their commentary throughout on God (He deserted them, etc.) practically ruins the entire 3 hour movie. Still, it is a pretty good film, especially for Titanic story fans! There is sexual content, violence, and fairly graphic implications of a rape. Rating: ***
"TO GILLIAN ON HER 37th BIRTHDAY" (PG- 13; 1996) Stars: Peter Gallagher, Michelle Pfeiffer, Claire Danes, Freddie Prinze Jr, very brief cameo by Seth Green
The only reason I wanted to see this movie was because of the amazing cast! No, it's not an ensemble, and they really aren't that exciting in it. Freddie does not look good and he plays a part that has very little real purpose in the movie. And by the way, does the title sound odd and a little boring? It fits. This movie is about a guy who's really hung up over his dead wife (Michelle Pfieffer, no she doesn't appear in only flashback form, she appears to the poor guy on the beach). I pretty much wanted everybody to leave the dude alone, but his daughter (Claire Danes, who might remind you of Meredith Monroe of Dawson's Creek in this movie) wasn't satisfied with that and neither are some old family friends (who's form of help comes with matchmaking and court dates). I thought they were going to make a point about loving someone for your entire life, even after death, but they didn't. It was annoying and pointless, but hey it's fairly clean! Innuendo about an affair that doesn't go anywhere and a little sex talk, maybe some language. A scene with teen drinking. Rating: *
"TOM AND HUCK" (PG) Stars: Jonathan Taylor Thomas, Brad Renfro, Racheal Leigh Cook (yes from "She's All That", but as a kid...she looks almost the same here! lol)
Old movie, yes, it's about Tom Sawyer and Huck Finn. It's actually pretty cute, but there is some amazingly graphic violence concerning a certain death-by- stabbing-in-a- cemetary scene. I wouldn't consider that appropriate for kids at all. The bad or boring probably outweighs the cute here. Rating: **
"TOMORROW NEVER DIES" (1997; PG-13) Stars: Pierce Brosnan (THE best James Bond ever), Teri Hatcher (Lois from LOIS & CLARK!)
Well, all I can say, really, is that the 3 most recent JB movies, all staring adorable Pierce Brosnan, are the best in the series (the rest are kinda boring, actually, if you ask me!). This one fits right in. Action, sex, violence, language. Partial nudity. Murder. All that good stuff. I love this one because there's an actual strong female role! James Bond meets supergirl. Or something like that. lol They make for a very cute motorcycle chase scene, in any case. Rating: **** (Not for kids, the rating is deserved!)
"TOOTHLESS" (PG) Stars: Kirstie Alley
My family kinda loves this movie. It's a lot of fun, and I personally love Kirstie Alley. It's a fantasy (she dies becomes the Tooth Fairy...oops, Tooth PERSON, they're politically correct! lol) and, well, the whole thing is in "limbo" so it's not exactly "spiritually correct"...lol But there are a lot of cute gags and no bad stuff! Rating: **** (For the entire family, but probably not really a film teens would sit around watching by themselves..lol Except maybe me, but since when am I average?)
"TOY STORY 2" (G; 1999) Stars: the voices of Tim Allen, Tom Hanks
What a cute movie! See it, just you, or with any kid you know, and just enjoy it. It's even better than the original. Dig the little nod to Star Wars towards the end...very cute. And praise the Lord, no Pokemon in sight! By the way, if you've been wondering about the scene with the doll singing where EVERYBODY has been crying? It's the cheesiest part in the movie! Really! (Even though I love Sarah McLachlan!) But whatever floats your boat. Oh and yes, the outtakes are adorable!! (I don't get to rate this one, do I. sigh! lol WELL..if I WERE going to rate it, it'd get 5 stars! lol I know, everybody loves a cheater...)
"THE TRUMAN SHOW" (PG-1998) Stars: Jim Carrey (and he's not being very funny!)
This movie was kinda different. I thought it was one of the most original plots that has come out in awhile, and apparently a lot of other people did too, because it's been copied like at least 2 times since it came out. Truman's whole life has been actually broadcast live on TV 24/7 for his whole life without him ever knowing. All the people around him are actors. And then he finds out. It's neat, complex, and asks a lot of good questions about life and God (or more appropriately, PLAYING GOD), but it may be a little difficult to figure out and the plot is basically just centered on Truman. (You know how your mother always told you the whole Universe didn't revolve around you? Truman's does! LOL) But it's pretty interesting! Rating: ***
"TURNER AND HOOCH" (PG; 1989) Stars: Tom Hanks
Oh my gosh, this is a sad movie! I'm sorry to ruin it for you, but it is. It was fun while it lasted, but ugh...Okay, there's a guy who hates dogs (he's incredibly NEAT and I mean that as in CLEAN and TIDY..lol) and he has to live with this dog named Hooch because he witnessed a murder and Turner, a cop, has to watch out for him, ya know? So you do the math and imagine how it ends. Oh and there's some sex and language and this one interesting scene where Tom Hanks runs around in his briefs and a t- shirt. Rating: **1/2 (if you like to cry this is your movie!)
"28 DAYS" (PG-13; 2000) Stars: Sandra Bullock
This is supposed to be a movie about rehab, but it's a little off it's mark. Sandra Bullock is fairly effective as an alcoholic, and some of the other characters are fairly effective in their various supporting roles. People took offense to this movie because it makes light of some situations that are, quite obviously, pretty serious. I didn't really see that big a problem there, but the movie still isn't worth the couple hours, because I practically forgot I'd even seen it by the next day. Rating: **
"TWO WEEKS NOTICE" (PG-13; 2002) Stars: Sandra Bullock, Hugh Grant
"Over. Done. Finished. A comedy about love at last glance." Surprisingly enough, that ad campaign line actually does sum up what I *did* like about this movie and how it is at least a little different from it's genre (the romantic comedy). Despite the fact that those very unique points made the ending feel slightly anticlimactic. It also had some funny moments, and I do like the people in it, though I wouldn't say they were at their absolute best. Look out for sexual implications, language, political badgering. Rating: ***
"UNBREAKABLE" (PG-13; 2000) Stars: Bruce Willis, Samuel L. Jackson, Robin Wright Penn
This is a M. Night Shyamalan film, which means it's original, with a lot of detail, and the camerawork is good. It has dark, suspenseful moments. It has language. It's also really cool. I think a lot of comic book fans will enjoy it. Rating: ***1/2
"VERTICAL LIMIT" (2000; PG-13) Stars: Chris O'Donnell, Bill Paxton, other people I don't want to go look up..
Well, it's fairly exciting and entertaining in an almost IMAX docu-drama sort of way. I could either say it was rather anticlimactic or say it was realistic in that they spread the danger out over the entire journey. Still, I hate movies with false crisis. The characters weren't really well developed, and it was pretty long, although I didn't really notice the time passing in a slow way (more in a "i'm going to regret spending 2 hours of my life this way later" way). Nature and manmade violence, language, light sexual implications. Rating: **
"THE VERY THOUGHT OF YOU" (PG-13) Stars: Joseph Fiennes, Monica Potter
I love this movie. I love the actors in it, too. Joseph Fiennes is so adorable. Anyway, this is a great movie. The only reason it wasn't a big hit is because people are way too used to the bubble-gum type movie (or music I might add) and the only time you can get them out to something unusual is if it's some kind of cult hit (i.e. The Sixth Sense). This is the kind of grown- up romantic comedy where when they use a cheap gag to get a laugh it's not cheap anymore because it's unexpected and handled so well it's realistic. Now, I will say this movie is better the first time around. Some movies are just like that, you know? So don't let anybody give away the plot to you! The movie could have gotten away with a PG except for all the innuendo. There are some great characters but they do talk about trash pretty easily. Rating: ***
"WASHINGTON SQUARE" (PG) Stars: Jennifer Jason Leigh, Albert Finney
I'll say one thing for this movie, it's not predictable. I wasn't sure HOW it was going to turn out - probably because I've never read Henry James, but I'll just tell you flat out I was disappointed. There were some rather cute parts in the middle (if you can ignore the beginning and end I'll recommend it..lol) but mostly it was a story about sad or silly people living hopeless lives, grasping at happiness..but never obtaining it. Doesn't that sound lovely. Rating: * 1/2
"THE WATERBOY" (PG-13) Stars: Adam Sandler
Well, this was my first and I wish only Adam Sander movie. It was incredibly stupid but I'm guessing ALL his are. I wouldn't recommend it to anybody but if you like Adam Sandler I'm sure you'll like this movie. There is a lot of sexual implications, references, some violence, etc. I wouldn't consider it appropriate for kids but that's who I watched it with and they liked it, FYI. Rating: -*
"THE WEDDING PLANNER" (PG-13; 2001) Stars: Jennifer Lopez, Matthew McConaughey
This movie always looked cute, but also like the run-of-the-mill chick-flick/love story. And besides, I don't like Matthew McConaugey (maybe it's just because his name is SO hard to spell!). But I absolutely LOVED the movie. It's funny, it's sweet, it's smart, it's respectful, it's genuine, it's believeable, and it's character-driven (the only complaint I would have on that front is the thing with Massimo..first he's really serious, then he gets her and doesn't care, then he steps out for "the one", then he's immediately ready for American flirting? what's up with that?). This has got to be one of my favorite love story movies. And, yes, chick flicks. I suppose (I wouldn't know) it's an excellent date movie, but it's an even better girl's nite movie! Rating: ****
"WHAT A GIRL WANTS" (PG; 2003) Stars: Amanda Byrnes, Colin Firth, Kelly Preston
In an age where strong father figures are hard to find both in the movies and real life, this movie was "born to stand out". Colin Firth is the most adorable dad ever, and though the ads, the title, and the soundtrack would have me believe this was just another fluff movie, his presence in the cast raised my hopes. The scene with the leather pants alone is worth watching this movie, it turns out, but besides that, I really liked it. So did my family, though I think we would have been more charmed by it if someone besides Amanda Byrnes had the title role. But she's okay. Where in the average teenage-girl movie, the "love interest" story would take center stage, in this movie the father-daughter relationship almost took on the same qualities that former relationship usually attempts (with flat results). I liked that a *lot*. I didn't realize at first that this was a remake of "The Reluctant Debutant" (is there nothing original anymore?) but it also reminds me quite a bit of "The Parent Trap" (the new one), with the British elements (though the England/American comparisons are played up quite a bit more in this) and the parents' divorce bits. Again, this might not have gone over very well with the age group they seemed to be begging for, but it's prime family fare. Rating: ***
"WHAT WOMEN WANT" (PG-13; 2000) Stars: Mel Gibson, Helen Hunt
I don't like Helen Hunt. I just don't see her as a romantic lead. So I think this movie would have been better with somebody else in her part...and yet I can't picture anybody different. I didn't see a whole lot of chemistry between Helen and Mel, but that said, I absolutely loved this movie. Mel Gibson was perfection as the "man's man" who somehow is gifted with the ability to hear womens' thoughts. I didn't think they made movies like this anymore. I mean, the soundtrack is full of Frank Sinatra for goodness sake. Anyway, Mel is probably what made it so good, because they didn't exactly "rise above" in areas where they had the chance. For instance, they had the perfect opportunity to mock the typical teenage girl stereotype with his daughter, and yet they simply followed the pat image (in other words, she was an immature idiot). Still, Mel's character and his eccentric behavior, unrealistic yet somehow common dilemma, and all the laughs of course, all make this movie worth seeing. (I'm even glad I saw it the day it opened and stood in line before rushing in front of a mob to get seats...lol) Rating: *** 1/2
"WHERE THE HEART IS" (PG-13; 2000) Stars: Ashley Judd, Natalie Portman
I kind of expected this one to be another feel-good chick flick, but it really surprised me. It actually seemed to be meant to have some kind of point to it (besides boy-meets-girl) but somehow they never got around to it. I think the goal was to portray life realistically. In any case, they did a pretty good job. The characters are particularly realistic. The plot covers a lot of time and should keep you interested. It has some strange stuff in it; talk of violence and sex, but no serious scenes. Rating: ***
"WHILE YOU WERE SLEEPING" (PG) Stars: Sandra Bullock, Peter Gallagher
This was a really sweet movie, funny, romantic, sensitive. Actually, I always thought it sounded boring but it isn't! I really liked it. There's no language or sex ...some vocal implications. Of course, I like Sandra Bullock a lot too. She's involved with two men in this movie, brothers. She doesn't know either of them until one of those cases of mistaken identity happens that she goes a long with because she's falling in love. It's a really sweet and simple movie and if you're a romantic you will DEFINITELY like it. lol Rating: ****
"WHITE OLEANDER" (PG-13; 2002) Stars: Alison Lohman, Michelle Pfeiffer, Renee Zellweger, Robin Wright Penn, Noah Wyle, Taryn Manning, Cole Hauser
The book is better, but the movie did what a movie could do with a story like this. The ensemble was handled fairly well, but I think they should have gone for a more graphic depiction and an "R" rating. I also think Lena Olin should have been the mother, because that's who I kept seeing in my head when I read the book. But that's just me. Rating: **
"WILD HEARTS CAN'T BE BROKEN" (1991; G) Stars: Gabrielle Anwar, Michael Schoeffling
This was one of my original favorite movies, and I still like it, even though it's kinda sad. Hopeful sad though, not just depressing sad. lol It's about a girl who dives horses. As in...dives them into water...it's very interesting. It takes place during the "great" depression, and it's based on a true story. I liked it because I was into horses, but it's a fairly neat movie. There's some intense moments, oh and I remember as a child I was upset by a couple parts where there was some slapping and yelling, but otherwise it's clean. Rating: ***
"WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE'S ROMEO & JULIET" (PG-13) Stars: Leonardo DiCaprio, Claire Danes
This is one of those VERRRY different movies that just doesn't fit the usual mode. I guess the facts that the movie is set in "modern times" and yet all the characters use Shakespeare's original Elizabethan English should tip you off. But that doesn't even cover the unusual theme you'll find from the beginning to end of this movie! You just have to watch it to understand. Frankly, the movie isn't even that good (although the end is even more tragic - well, at least the first time around you should be moved! lol- than usual) but it's so down- right strange you might want to try it, just for something different. There are some cute scenes and interesting music. A word to the wise: loud, violent, some sensuality, drug use, and obviously, character death. lol Rating: ***
"THE WORLD IS NOT ENOUGH" (PG-13; 1999) Stars: Pierce Brosnan, Denise Richards, a bunch of other Bond girls and M and Q (the last Bond movie with Desmond whatshisname playing Q!)...
Okay, so everybody knows James Bond is a cool dude (sexist, but cute! Especially Pierce Brosnan! Whoo! lol), right? Most people go to his movies for the action, and, well, 'cause he's cool! lol This movie lives up to the status quo. Sex, action, sophistication, cute Pierce....you get the picture. And yes, the much- talked-about waterboat chase scene DOES live up to it's reputation. It's awesome. And the action DOES start right away, as usual. And dig that theme song! Very interesting. Anyway, it's a cool movie. Not for kids. lol Rating: *** 1/2 (but how can I rate 007??)
"X-MEN" (PG-13; 2000) Stars: Patrick Stewart, Hugh Jackman, James Marsden, Halle Berry, Anna Paquin, Rebecca Romijn-Stamos
Okay, I like sci-fi once in awhile, but I was never into X-Men, and I never will be. Especially since evolution and tolerance (the politically correct version, that is) are major premises for this movie. Still, this movie has a full plot. There's a lot here. I THINK it might be perfect for Star Trek geeks (no offense). lol However, I still found it very ...interesting..lol There is no way to describe it. It was different from what I was expecting, and I didn't even HAVE any real expectations! lol Rating: **1/2
"X-MEN 2" (PG-13; 2003) Stars: Patrick Stewart, Hugh Jackman, James Marsden, Halle Berry, Anna Paquin, Rebecca Romijn-Stamos, Famke Janssen, Alan Cumming, Bruce Davison, Kelly Hu, Aaron Stanford, Shawn Ashmore
I do enjoy comic/superhero movies. I really like how the X-Men movies are grounded in a realistic plot: discrimination is a topic that is frequently portrayed very badly, but although the mutant bigotry is an important dramatic element to the plot of these movies, it's not overpowering. The special effects, always important to a movie of this type, were enjoyable.
There were a few plot holes that I assume were meant as cliffhangers; obviously, there will be an X3. The cast is too large to focus on all the characters at once, and I felt Rogue (Paquin) and Scott (Marsden) were underused in this one. Rating: ***
"XXX" (PG-13; 2002) Stars: Vin Diesel
I hate to say it, because Vin Diesel's cool and all, but I don't think he can carry a whole movie by himself. The lack of good dialogue could have had something to do with it, but somehow I can't even picture Vin Diesel pulling off any of the smoothly witty lines that are necessary for a true "secret agent man". Vin Diesel is no James Bond. This movie seemed to be more of an excuse for a heavy-metal soundtrack than anything else, and it made me very uncomfortable to watch (it could have been the company, I admit) because there was no redeeming depth to it. The only good thing you can say about it is that it's non-stop action -although even that, I felt, was far from satisfying because we've seen it all before and most of that more realistically. I like to think of myself as fairly androgynous when it comes to my taste in movies, but perhaps it does take a 'certain type' of guy to appreciate this flick. For example, the one scene with blatant sexual content was beyond unncecessary and went on far too long. The bad guys are really bad, but they're Russians -been there, done that. Also violence, language. Rating: **
"YOU'VE GOT MAIL" (PG-1998) Stars: Tom Hanks, Meg Ryan (with her cute short hair!)
Tom and Meg back together again! If you love e- mail you'll probably like this movie because it's about an Internet romance. Throw in the fact that Meg and Tom's characters hate each other (with good reason) in real life and there you have a great movie, much better than the ones it was based on! Rating: **** (ditto "Sleepless...")
"ZOOLANDER" (PG-13; 2001) Stars: Ben Stiller, Owen Wilson, Will Ferrell, Milla Jovovich
Wacky movie. Probably only for a certain humour type. There's a *lot* of "edgy" sexual content. Rating: **
Go to A-I or J-P
And here's the rating system I'm using:
***** Worth seeing in the theatre. Not that I'll mind if you don't see it in the theatre. I don't see half of the ones worth the money in the theatre myself. I'm so frugal..
**** If you're a movielover or even a movie liker, you'll wanna check out this movie. Plan to get it the day it hits video.
*** Average. (You'll see a lot with this rating.) You might like it, you might not, depends on your taste. If you're bored, need some movies, you shouldn't be too disappointed by one with this rating.
** If you're so sure I don't know what I'm talking about, at least wait 'til it's on a movie channel to see one with this rating.
* If you like crappy movies, don't miss it. (There are more on the page with this rating now that I've started rating them on these guidelines, with the monetary worth in mind..lol)
If you're looking for R rated movies, I did finally start a small page for some R movies I've seen here.
I never put up reviews of movies I've only seen the edited version of, just to be sure I don't recommend something that has really bad stuff I don't know about in it. That does rule out ALL the movies I've seen on TV, so it's a bummer, but I like to be careful. Also, in case you haven't already figured it out, I don't rate animated movies!
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