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Dark Angel Season Two Quotes
Here is my list of the best lines in the show, second season edition. Click here to read my favorite second season bad lines. If you don't see your favorite quote here, or have others you would like me to add, please email me. Thanks!
Click on the links below to go to a certain episode's quotes.
Season Two
[Designate This] [Bag 'Em] [Proof of Purchase] [Radar Love]
[Boo] [Two] [Some Assembly Required] [Gill Girl]
[Medium is the Message] [Brainiac] [The Berrisford Agenda] [Borrowed Time]
[Harbor Lights] [Love In Vein] [Fuhgeddaboudit]
[Exposure] [Hello, Goodbye] [Dawg Day Afternoon]
[She Ain't Heavy] [Love Among the Runes] [Freak Nation]
ORIGINAL CINDY: Sector four? I ain’t goin’ all the way out there. It’s raining.
NORMAL: Is it raining, in Seattle? Stop the presses.
RENFRO: State your designation.
MAX: Kiss my transgenic ass!
X5-494: What the hell was that?!
MAX: The only kind of physical contact you and I are gonna have.
X5-494: Fine. Don’t “freak out” on me. (Max gives him a weird look) I took Common Verbal Usage when I got cleared for my solo missions.
X5-494: Successful copulation between myself and X5-452, ma’am. … Twice.
LYDECKER: You all right?
LOGAN: You shot me!
LYDECKER: I told you to duck.
ALEC: Yeah, I’d stop touching him if I were you. You’re just gonna make it worse.
MAX: What the hell are you talking about?
ALEC: A genetically targeted retrovirus. You’re the carrier. Any intimate contact between you activates the agent. Now, you didn’t kiss him or anything, did you?
SKETCHY: Ooh, mutants on the loose. The genetically superior walk among us.
ALEC: What are you bozos thinking, knocking over a Kwik-E-Mart?
MALE: Why would Manticore try to get rid of us?
ALEC: I want to get rid of you, and I just met you.
ALEC (to the X7): Hey, weird kid. Want some hydrogenated imitation pork product?
MAX: You're the girl that threw up.
ALEC: You could always call her Ralph.
ALEC: Well, when the going gets cute, the tough get going.
WHITE: Having a little family reunion?
MAX: You must be the new bad guy in my life.
WHITE: You know, 452, you're much prettier than in your picture.
MAX: Gee, miss the old bad guys already.
ALEC (passing the truck): They're heading the wrong way. Hey, you're heading the wrong way! Typical.
MAX: The laser show's still going. If you wanna be the hero, you can't be half-assed about it. Let's go.
MAX: Logan found an ex-Manticore tech thinks he can cure the virus.
ORIGINAL CINDY: When you gonna let your face in on the good news?
SKETCHY: If I was making creatures in a lab, I'd make 'em look just like you.
ASHA: Really? That's--that's really sweet.
WHITE: Tell me, 494, have you been in contact with this girl? We know that you were breeding partners back at Manticore.
ALEC: It was just a summer fling.
WHITE: Oh, one more thing. Bring back their barcodes. Proof of purchase.
LOGAN: Don't you people ever knock?
MAX: What are you doing here?
ALEC: Looking for you. The fact is, I should be with my own kind. Was wondering if you hooked up with any of the others.
MAX: You looking to start a support group?
ALEC: We're, uh, looking for someone. Maybe you've seen him around.
SECOND MAN: What's he look like?
MAX: Um...really tall, wears an Army jacket, kind of...uh...
ALEC: ...hairy. Lots of growling, some barking... (The man’s dog barks at him) Like that.
MAX: You Sandeman? You don't look like the father of my country. Name Manticore mean anything to you?
MAN: Honest, lady, I don't know what you want.
MAX: Hey! I asked you a question. You got any kids, any little mutant kids?
MAX (to Alec): Oh, before I forget, thanks so much for not killing me.
TECH: I can disarm it. It'll cost you ten grand.
MAX: That the only number you know?
JOSHUA: Max and Logan, gettin' busy. That's the plan.
MAX: I just want things to be the way they were. You know, when we could hold hands without you keeling over on me.
MAX (to Rafer): Next time you wanna cop a feel, hit me harder and make sure I'm out cold.
NORMAL: Hey, let's go! Bip bip bip! It's called Jam Pony, not Jam Clydesdale.
ORIGINAL CINDY (to Sketchy): Were you born dumb, or do you put in work?
MAX: If this has something to do with me and my furry little friends, then how come all the victims are Chinese? Manticore's always been real big on equal opportunity.
JOSHUA: Yeah, you'll see. This virus bitch going down.
WHITE: Cyril! Action is character. Show me some.
CYRIL: Well, that sounds like a plan. By the weekend, there won't be a transgenic left alive from here to San Diego.
WHITE: Good. Maybe I'll play a round of golf on Sunday.
MAX (smiling): Normal, when it comes to a test of wills, you're gonna win, hands down.
ORIGINAL CINDY: 'Cause you the man.
MAX: But at what price? I mean, you're gonna lose half a day tomorrow easy, just getting the toilet paper off the building.
RAFER'S MOM: You are not what you seem!
MAX: Guess you busted me on my push-up bra.
MAX: What the hell are you doing? Get your ass back here!
SALLY: What do you want me to do? Body's got a mind of its own. Rover doesn't have a prayer. I run like the wind, baby.
SALLY: Right now I'm in a situation, extreme in nature. Get my drift?
KAT: Let me guess. The business part of you's run off again.
WAITRESS: Heart, liver, lung of a sheep, minced with suet, onions, and oatmeal, boiled in the animal's stomach. Comes with French fries or coleslaw.
JOSHUA: Haggis. Yum!
KATARINA: I'll have the haggis.
DIETER: I'll have the haggis.
RAFER: Just water.
MAX: Nothing for me, thanks.
WAITRESS: Haggis, haggis, haggis, one water, one nothing.
NORMAL: I hate cats. Vile creatures. They're always sleeping and licking themselves.
SALLY: Hey, brown sugar, what's cookin'?
ORIGINAL CINDY: Sweet baby Jesus!
LOGAN: Bingo!
MAX: You found something?
LOGAN: No, I got bingo.
MAX: We need to fan out and search the place top to bottom. Joshua, you take the basement.
JOSHUA: Joshua in basement. Always the plan.
ORIGINAL CINDY: What the hell was that?!
MAX: Flashback. Happens all the time.
MAX: Read my lips, pretty boy. Get a life, get a job, and stop sticking your nose into mine. Don't make me kick your ass!
ALEC: You know, this whole tough-chick act thing is really unbecoming. "I'm gonna bounce you on your ass. I'm gonna smack your bitch head." It's so unfeminine.
ORIGINAL CINDY (regarding Alec): He's from Manticore, huh? Say what you want--they sure know how to make 'em pretty.
THIRD STEELHEAD: Uh, Eddie, we're just wondering--what's in the boxes?
EDDIE: Livers and kidneys.
THIRD STEELHEAD: You mean--we've been hefting these things around just so you can make some nasty English pie?
EDDIE (getting in Alec’s face): What's a poofter like you need with five hundred bucks, anyway, eh?
ALEC (in a British accent): Actually, I need it for a ride on your mum.
ALEC: It's just 'cause she's hot, you know.
LOGAN: What is?
ALEC: Everything. Everything she gets away with. You honestly think we'd be down here in this moldy dump looking for God-knows-what if she were ugly?
LOGAN: We're down here to give Max a hand.
ALEC (laughing): You're so whipped.
ORIGINAL CINDY: Tell Max what you told me about those guys that kicked your butt.
SKETCHY: It's been a pretty violent month for the Sketchmeister. Could you be a tad more specific?
MAX: Guess we're just gonna have to get their attention, then.
ALEC: Please tell me you're gonna get naked.
BIRD: Yeah. And she took off with our boy. I saw.
EDDIE: I want him back. He cost me a pretty penny, and...I--I miss him, I do.
SKETCHY: What, are you kidding? Back when he was a Jam Pony hump, this generous man showed me some tight shortcuts through downtown. Helped me shave hours off my workday.
MAX: Giving you extra time to nap and get high.
SKETCHY: Precisely.
ZACK: I always liked Sketchy...I think.
LOGAN: I'm exhausted. She won't take a nap...she won't eat anything I give her...
MAX: Oh, she doesn't like bruschetta with a crisp pre-pulse sauterne?
LOGAN: Look, it's one thing for Manticore to give you a retrovirus tailor-made to kill me, but I seriously doubt that they factored a six-year-old into their evil plan.
ORIGINAL CINDY: Chicken pox? Thought that went out with Starbucks and Madonna.
MAX: Can't you see I'm getting ready for a bath?
ALEC: Funny, women and water. Seems to be the theme of my evening.
ALEC: Okay, now would be a good time to look like we belong here, huh? (Max starts rubbing his head distractedly) Wow, Max. You, uh, you done this before?
MAX: Can we concentrate on coming up with a plan?
ALEC: I'm thinking.
MAX: You're talking.
ALEC: I can do both.
MAX: I doubt that.
ALEC: Well, you just lost your tip.
ALEC: He's not gonna die for anybody. He's going right back into the water. He's gonna swim away and meet a nice flounder somewhere.
MAX: [Did Logan] find White's place?
ALEC: Of course he did. He always does stuff like that.
JOSHUA: Virus bitch going down?
WENDY: Truth is, he doesn’t care much for Eyes Only. Thinks what you people do is...subversive.
ALEC: Look, Josh, you’re a great artist, apparently. But you’re also, to be frank, a dog-boy.
MAX: Bad things happen to bad people too!
RITA: An artist burns bright for an instant, and then extinguishes like a scrape of phosphorus.
ALEC: Well, call it his Blue Period. It’ll be worth a fortune.
ALEC: You know, but just, uh, tell her you lost the papers. Tell her, uh, I don’t know, tell her your dog ate ‘em. Tell her you ate ‘em.
RITA: Yeah. Um, I told your representative you could have the painting back if you’d just ask for it in person.
JOSHUA: Here I am, in person. Give it back!
WHITE: Pain is a phantom of the mind.
ALEC: Okay, question--have you ever pretended to write down a guy's phone number?
BRAIN: Predictions using probability algorithms that are stored in my--Look, are you sure you want to hear this?
ASHA: I'm off to the frozen north. I don't know who to trust. I'm not happy about this, Logan.
LOGAN: Well, I'm not happy about it, either.
ALEC: Well, if she's not happy, and you're not happy, then I'm not happy. Max, are you happy?
ALEC (to Logan): What in the world do they see in you?
MAX: Watch the hands.
BRAIN: I'm just tryin' to hang on here.
MAX: Hang on a little lower. … Not that low.
NORMAL: The gentler sex sure can pack a wallop when she has a mind to.
MAX: Give 'em a chance. From the looks of this place, it probably takes ten minutes just to get from the kitchen to the front door.
LOGAN: Hey, cut Bessie a little slack. Considering the number of times she's been shot up and put back together, I'm lucky she even runs at all.
LOGAN: Ah, the latest adventures of Alec, the lovable X-5 rogue. I can hardly wait.
ORIGINAL CINDY: Men. Dogs. No difference. (bites into a hot dog)
SECOND AGENT: Under the impression there's a romantic interest on her part? ... Do you think she likes you?
ALEC: You can't understand; you weren't there. You ran. You and your little rugrat brothers and sisters. You think life was rough when we were ten? A little schooling, a little brainwashing, some maneuvers outside? You think that was tough? Take it from me. Later on, it got a whole lot worse. But you did what you had to do. Then you tried to forget. And when you couldn't forget, they had ways of making you not care.
ALEC: I don't want your pity. I want your absence.
MAX: I could have killed you over a stupid game of pool.
LOGAN: I thought it was a very satisfying game of pool, actually. Want to get a drink?
MAX: I just want to know I'm not gonna kill the guy if, say, I touch his hand by accident.
ORIGINAL CINDY: Or if, say, you spend a long weekend making hot monkey love to the man...by accident.
MAX: Got word from this fence I know. There's a collector willing to pay top dollar for Star Wars: Episode VII. After the Pulse, they shut down production. Apparently this is the only footage that exists.
ALEC: Is that the one where Captain Kirk dies?
MAX: Hey, people have the right to see this stuff. It shouldn't be locked up in a vault.
ALEC: Oh, of course, yeah. That Murdoch's one evil fiend.
ALEC: Argh! I can't believe this. I've been stuck in this closet for over an hour to facilitate you having sex!
ALEC: Oh yeah, yeah, sure. I can see how the right time might elude you...for a year.
LOGAN: How about a perfect quickie?
ALEC: I mean, why consummate two years of unbridled passion when we can have pasta?
MAX: Can my life suck any harder?
MAX: Come on. Come on. That's right. Nasty-ass mutant son of a ...
ALEC: Not to worry. There is a logical explanation for everything that happened here tonight, all right? Just give me a minute.
MAX: Nice haircut.
LOGAN: Nice gunshot wound.
MAX: If I knew this is all it took to get a visit from Logan Cale, I would’ve gotten my ass shot up a while ago.
OTTO: So what do we do now?
WHITE: Now? Well, now we, uh, go home. We pray really, really hard that she doesn’t expose the massive government conspiracy that we’ve been assigned to cover up.
OTTO: Oh, sarcasm. Very good, sir.
MAX: Hey, doc. Where’s your body condom?
MAX: Question--did you pay your malpractice insurance? ’Cause, you know, I’d prefer a cash settlement to taking your house and car.
MAX: Let me guess. You’re one of White’s breeding-cult psychos. You’d think after ten generations of selective reproduction, you wouldn’t have such a fat ass.
ORIGINAL CINDY (to Logan): I know you saved my girl and all, but couldn’t you have brought her back in better condition than this?
ALEC (to Joshua): A chance for you to get out there, see the world. I thought your kind liked to take walks.
JANIS: Great. We got some buffalo wings coming.
JOSHUA: Buffalo wings?
JANIS: Chicken wings.
JOSHUA: Ah, chicken with buffalo in his cocktail.
LOGAN: But he believed it. They all did...except for Max, and eleven of her brothers and sisters. They wanted out so much they escaped, and they've spent the last eleven years defending their freedom with their lives. That barcode on the back of their necks? That was put there to keep track of them, like a brand. So when she sees someone like you, eager to be a slave, wearing it...it kills her inside.
JOSHUA: I thought they would understand. So I took off my helmet, and they didn't understand, Max. They were just like, "Ahhh! Ohh! Oh my God, dude, look at him! He's got a dog face! He's got a dog face! I'm trippin'! Are you trippin'? I'm trippin'!" "Sorry! Sorry!" "I'm trippin'! Oh my God!"
MIA: That is so exciting. But, Max, you have to be careful. Those guys are dangerous.
MAX: Oh, it's cool. I'm genetically engineered. I can totally kick their asses.
MAX: If I wanted to get reprimanded, you know, I could always go to work.
MAX: So I figured what's more normal than volunteering for his oh-so-urgent, let's-save-the-world-by-Tuesday Eyes Only missions?
MIA: Logan, I think there's something that Alec wants to say to you.
ALEC: Yeah, Logan, I just...wanted to say that I understand why Max admires you so much. Sometimes I wish I had more of a purpose in life.
MIA: Logan, is there something you want to say to Alec?
LOGAN: Well, it's just that...I don't know, sometimes I wish I was more of a free spirit, and...it must be nice to be a happy-go-lucky sociopath. Kinda envy you.
MIA: Awww. Group hug!
MAX: What the hell is going on over there?!
NORMAL: I had this dream about you the other night. You were this, uh, Roman gladiator, and you slew barbarians and Medusa-like women, and I was your tiny little valet. I wiped your sword clean after every sweet victory. I rubbed your tired, beautiful, golden muscles...
ALEC: Hot run! Fourth and Main! (runs away)
DOUGIE: I need a plan, a course of action. Something! It's--it's that Catholic thing. I'm having bad thoughts. I'm having bad thoughts!
MAX: Or...maybe I was in a fight.
LOGAN: Maybe you were in a fight?
MAX: With Mia. … She hit me. Really hard, that bitch!
MIA: So what are you guys up to?
MAX: I was about to ask you the same question.
MIA (sighing): Here we go again.
MAX: No, she fixed the fight so a bunch of mobsters could make a killing on you.
ALEC: You say that like it's a bad thing.
LOGAN: You're about to get dead, Dougie. You were on thin ice with the boss already, and that's before you lost him a lot of money. You go with them, you're gonna end your night in cement shoes.
SECOND GANGSTER: "Cement shoes"? Who talks like that?
MAX: How'd you know I'd win?
MIA: 'Cause girls kick ass. That's what the T-shirt says, right?
ALEC: What are the chances he stumbles across an actual Manticore alum that's stupid enough to let him snap a shot?
SKETCHY: Hey, guys. (Snaps a picture of them on his way out)
MAX (to Alec): You were saying?
MAX: I watch, I learn, I steal sodas.
MAX: What are you doing with Ray?
PRIESTESS: What is necessary.
MAX: Could you be a little more specific? 'Cause I left my copy of Wacky Cult Rituals for Dummies at home.
OTTO: We're looking for one of your messengers. Male, early twenties, long hair, ratty clothes.
NORMAL: Uh, tragically, sir, you've just described every young man in my employ.
BOY: Want me to put you down?
MAX: Depends. If you hold me up here long enough, will your head explode?
SKETCHY: The truth is out there, people. The mutants exist, and I'm gonna prove it. (Leaves)
ALEC: Well, that didn't go as well as I'd hoped.
ORIGINAL CINDY: No, it did not.
ALEC: Of course, the important question is, who gets to tell Max?
LOGAN: You said all of White's cult pals have one?
MAX: Yep. Right here. I saw it when they were saluting their holy snake god, or whatever the hell it was.
LOGAN: I wandered all over the hospital looking for you with the back of my gown open.
ALEC: Logan could use a little canine plasma to loosen him up.
ALEC: Welcome to the world of attention deficit. [re: a rap video]
LOGAN (pouring another drink): So Sandeman is one of White's cult loonies, huh? Woo-hoo.
JOSHUA: Hey, little fella.
MAX: Hey, big fella.
ALEC: I guess that makes me medium fella.
EYES ONLY: Not alive? Not human? Who are you to sit in judgment, Mr. Caldwell? Have you seen that tape? Did you see the look in his eyes? He was scared, cornered. And despite what people like you have been saying about them, transgenics aren’t that different from you and me. They do feel, they do hurt, they are alive. … Take a moment to talk to those you’re condemning. They could tell you what it’s like to be afraid, alone in a hostile world. And it might be more convenient to pretend otherwise, but in the end, who does that say more about - them, or us? This has been a streaming freedom video bulletin. Peace. Out.
WHITE: A hundred thousand years ago, some humpback violates a dolphin, and this is what we get. Makes a pretty good argument for selective breeding, huh? [re: a beluga whale]
MAX: Sketchy? Idiot.
WHITE: Idiot.
NORMAL: You idiot!
LOGAN: I just want you to know...however things may be between us, I always got your back.
MAX: I know. Me too.
ORIGINAL CINDY: Don't even look like him. Doggie-dog is way better-looking than that. [re: the shirt featuring the police sketch of Joshua]
ORIGINAL CINDY (indicating Alec): Does he know he's your new squeeze?
MAX: Hell, no.
WHITE: You really think you could hide from me, 452?
X-453: Oh, God.
WHITE: What, no witty rejoinders today?
MAX: One of these days, White and his men are going to bust through that door, and you're liable to get caught in the crossfire.
ORIGINAL CINDY: I'll kick their asses.
X5-453: It's been ten years since the first time you ruined my life. I'll be damned if I let that happen again.
X5-453: It's no use. I've got ten years of training on you.
MAX: Yeah, well, they didn't teach you to fight dirty.
MAX: The point is, I'm gonna trade your sorry ass for her husband and kid.
WHITE: I don't think so.
MAX (holding up the lead pipe): No? Well, then, I guess we get to find out how high your pain threshold really is.
MAX: I appreciate this.
ALEC: Yeah, no worries. Anything for a friend, or a clone of a friend.
OTTO: Really? Didn't know you were into astronomy.
WHITE: There's a fair number of things you don't know about me, Otto.
ORIGINAL CINDY: Normal, how do we know that's you're not a transgenic that's just running a game so that nobody suspects you?
MAX: What is it with these snakes? It's like Ames White and his Familiars are following me around.
ALEC: "Ames White and his Familiars." Kinda sounds like a rock band, you know?
LOGAN: Huh.
MAX: "Huh" as in, "Strange, but I know exactly what it is, huh," or "Huh, what the hell is going on?"
MAX: I drank a bottle of something that said "Tattoos From Within." Was that wrong?
WHITE: Now, before I kill you and end this little story, I have to ask you about my son. Is he alive?
MAX: No. Yeah. Well, what was the question?
MAX: Two million years of human evolution and this is what we get. You morons.
MOLE: Hey, Max. How'd it go?
MAX: Ever notice how drug dealers have no sense of humor when it comes to money?
SECOND GUY ON TV: Yeah, get out of town, you egg-sucking freaks!
DIX: Well? You heard him, boys. Looks like it's back to Manticore.
ALEC: It's not my birthday.
NORMAL: Yeah, it's right there in black and white on your application form.
ALEC: Oh yeah, yeah. Boy, nothing gets by you, does it, Normal?
OTHER DRIVER: Hey! Punk-ass! Look what you did to my truck!
JOSHUA: Uh-oh.
MOLE: Punk-ass?
JOSHUA: Uh-oh.
MOLE: I'll say one thing for ordinaries--they know when to run.
JOSHUA: Maybe we should run, too.
MOLE: We don't run, we fall back.
ALEC (as Mole pulls him into Jam Pony): Oh, this should be interesting.
NORMAL: Jumpin' George Dubya.
NORMAL: My golden boy's a mutant.
ALEC: We prefer "genetically empowered."
NORMAL: Take me, Jesus.
MOLE: Careful what you wish for.
MAX: What's that?
ALEC: It's a hole in my body made by a bullet.
MAX: Been there, done that.
NORMAL (to Gem): Okay. Okay, you're fully dilated. You're in a late second stage. It's not going to be long now. I want you to breathe from your diaphragm, okay?
ORIGINAL CINDY: And you know this how?
NORMAL: Dad was a dairy farmer. I know my way around the inside of a heifer better than you do.
JOSHUA: He deserves to die! He killed Annie!
MAX: No. He deserves to die, a lot. But if you kill him now, the only thing people will remember about today is how some transgenic killed a human being in cold blood...and then they'll never stop hunting us.
MAX: Bring around your muscle queens anytime. I'll be happy to kick their ass.
WHITE: We are not finished.
MAX: Fe'nos tol, bitch.
LOGAN (to Alec): Just for the record, that chick was kicking your ass.
MAX: Where are we gonna go? I can't stop anyone from leaving, but I'm through running and hiding and being afraid. I'm not gonna live my life like that anymore. Aren't you tired of living in darkness? Don't you want to feel the sun on your face? To have a place of your own where you can walk down the street without being afraid? They made us, and they trained us to be soldiers, to defend this country. It's time for them to face us and take responsibility, instead of trying to sweep us away like garbage. We were made in America and we're not going anywhere. So they call us freaks; who cares? Today I'm proud to be a freak. And today we're gonna make a stand, right here. Who's with me?
REPORTER: Tell us about your captors. What are these creatures like? Is it true you delivered a transgenic baby?
NORMAL: Yes, I did indeed. And a beautiful, bouncing baby girl she is.
REPORTER: So you're saying they're not all monsters, then?
NORMAL: Monsters? No. No more than you and me.