Genealogy at Heartland Helpline

Interviewing a Descendant

A couple of weeks ago, we went on a "field trip" because we found some descendants of my great grand-aunt. The descendants were in a state we never would have thought because none of our other ancestors were in Iowa! This was a gold mine of an opportunity because we couldn't find this family before, nor could any of my cousins for that matter.

After we located the cemetery where the ancestors were buried, we took pictures of the grave markers and recorded the information on tape. This took about 45 minutes. I wanted to make this "field trip" worthwhile. We drove over 200 miles, I wanted to find out more! So we stopped into a local hardware store and borrowed the phone book. Aha! There were two descendants still living in this town. So we went to both residences. No luck with the first one, but luck with the second one.

Do you remember the family group sheets I mentioned last time? It so happened that I shoved those into my carrying bag at the last minute before leaving my house. Good thing I did. I explained to this second cousin - once removed who I was, what we were doing in Iowa, and why I came to her house. As soon as I explained this, I pulled out my family group sheets and showed the cousin that I was who I said I was. I was invited in for a visit!

I pulled out my notebook and asked this cousin if it was okay if I wrote down information while she talked. ALWAYS get permission first. Remember, they don't know you.

I mentioned some names from the cemetery and she was delighted that I did my homework before visiting with her. I zeroed in on her grandmother, my great grand-aunt, and just let the cousin talk. So my next suggestion is - try not to interrupt. Let the person keep talking and ask questions when you need to clarify a name. Try to pay attention to the tone of voice and look the person has on their face while talking about one particular individual. I learned that my great grand-aunt was very highly regarded and much loved by the family.

Then came the pictures. My cousin had a picture of this great grand-aunt and the cousin, herself, when she was a toddler. I found this aunt to be a very beautiful person and stated so. I also commented on the physical traits this aunt had inherited from her mother, my gr-gr-grandmother. This prompted the cousin to pull out even more pictures. One of the pictures she pulled out had the name of a photo studio my great-grandfather and great grand-uncle owned together. Another tiny piece of puzzle fit into the family picture. As exciting as this information can be, know when to stop asking questions. You don't want to wear out the Welcome Mat on the first visit. You can always send follow-up letters or ask for another visit for a later time.

After our interview, which lasted about an hour, the cousin invited us to come and visit her any time. I hope we can sometime drop in and visit with her again as she was such a delight, as well as being family.

The first residence we went to, that was her brother. I left a note for him on his door letting him know we stopped by, who we were, etc. I also let this cousin I visited know that we did this to put her a bit at ease and so she could tell her brother about our visit.

When I got home, I typed up the notes and forwarded them to my aunt and a half-cousin, in addition to keeping a copy for my files. I also sent a follow up letter to this cousin along with a separate sheet of a few questions, along with a self-addressed stamped envelope (SASE). I also included a family tree sheet to help fill in names of other relatives that this family didn't know about.

To sum up the interview process: have your family group sheets for identification; explain to the person who you are and why you are visiting; let the person talk about whomever they wish - but give them a suggested person you want to learn more about; know when to stop the interview; thank the person for the interview; type your notes up and forward to other interested family members; follow the visit up with a thank-you note.

DaraSue's Quick Tip: Let the person see the notes you are taking in case they want to correct something they said or something you wrote down incorrectly. Your notes might also jog their memory of other information they would want you to know.