Disclaimer : The characters of Xena, Gabrielle, Ephiny, Solari, Argo and Joxer belong to the wonderful people at Renaissance Pictures who invented them. I have only borrowed them for my own warped enjoyment and promise not to chip or damage them and to replace any run-down batteries before I give them back. All other characters and events in this piece sprang from fully formed my fevered imagination - Zeus eat your heart out!

Warning : This story is subtextually enriched, and while not overly explicit, the thought of Xena and Gabrielle becoming lovers may offend some fans of the show. If this is describes you, stop now and put your blinkers back on. Oh, and other women besides our heroines look lasciviously at each other from time to time - you have been warned!

For your edification and entertainment, the author, in gratitude to the RenPic people for developing a new subtext which she first detected in the Season Four epsiode "In Sickness and In Health", has presented part of this story in Argovision.

This story takes place between the Season Three episodes "The Bitter Suite" and "One against an Army".

Thanks to lucath not only for her encouragement, but also for offering to clutter up her very cool website with the ramblings of this neophyte bard.

En Fin, En Suite.

Part One

by Cyclops

The Bitterest Day

Ephiny leaned on Solari for support, her broken right arm hanging uselessly at her side. They inched cautiously towards the edge of the cliff, afraid of what they were going to see when they at last looked over it. Behind them, the bay horse whinnied as Hippodamia caught him and began to calm him. He was still spooked by the headlong gallop that raving lunatic had spurred him into, and he was snorting furiously to clear the stench of blood from the battered being she had made him drag behind them.
"Er, guys....maybe they went for a walk?"
Half a dozen pairs of Amazon eyes settled on the hapless Joxer with searing glares that would have melted bronze. Even he fell silent.
Solari looked at Ephiny, and at the blonde woman's nod they leaned forward and looked down. They looked back at each other, puzzlement plain in their faces, and then they looked back down again. The rocks below were bare, the tide was beginning to ebb, but there was nothing and no-one being carried away on it.
Ephiny frowned at her second-in-command.
"They couldn't have survived that fall!" said Solari.
"Unless...." murmured Ephiny.
"A ledge?"
They inched a little nearer again to the edge, leaned out a little more. The cliff face was a sheer drop, and there was nothing to afford a handhold to, let alone break the fall of two adult women. There wasn't even a piece of vegetation to cling to.
"Where could they have gone to?"
"No idea, " said Ephiny through gritted teeth, the pain of her broken arm beginning to register now that the adrenaline was wearing off.
"Look, you go back to the village, you need to have that arm seen to. Send me some more Amazons and I'll organise the search party."
Ephiny managed a tight little smile for her second,ess. I'll fill you in on the plans first thing in the morning," she smiled at him, and earned a nervous grin in return.
"It'll be a matter of watching. For anything the tide might bring back. Sword, chakram...you know."
He gulped hard. "Better get some rest then. Good night Solari."

Afternoon - two days after the Bitterest

Ephiny and Hippodamia, the village blacksmith were deep in consultation near the buckets of water and oats at the edge of the village, as Solari passed them on her way to the clifftop. Even Joxer had taken his turn on watch, and the later ones would be taken by the younger Amazons. Smith and regent waved to the dark-haired woman as she left for her fruitless task.
The grizzled smith took a few steps forward, and the golden mare took several more away from her.
"See what I mean? Argo and I always got on like a hut on fire, but she won't let me near her." Hippodamia folded her arms across her leather apron and snorted in a rather horse-like fashion.
Ephiny suppressed a smile, for she could see that the smith's concern for the beautiful animal was warranted, but Damia's relationship with Argo was a source of great amusement for her sister Amazons. She and Argo had been friends long before the stocky woman had warmed to the warhorse's mistress. Even at this distance, Ephiny could see that the girth must be pinching the mare's belly and the saliva was frothing on her lips from the unrelieved pressure of the bit in her mouth.
"We have to do something Eph, she's such a dream to ride and that will ruin her mouth."
"I know, Damia, I know," agreed Ephiny shifting her arm in the sling a little to ease the ache. "Xena would be frantic if she saw her like this, but what can we do? She's so well-trained she won't let anyone near her if Xena says so, and she obviously did."
"What seems to be the problem, ladies?" asked Joxer in his most gallant manner.
"Argo," said Damia tartly, turning away from him. If it was possible for anyone to have less patience with the Mighty Joxer than Gabrielle, the smith was ahead of the posse.
"She needs a break from her tack," offered Ephiny who had been moved by Joxer's devotion over the last few days.
"Allow me," he said grandiosely, and pushed his way between them. "Argo and I are old friends."
Damia rolled her eyes to heaven and shook her head. This was going to end badly, the gesture seemed to say, as the two Amazons watched him approach the palomino.
Argo had settled down after the two Amazons stopped trying to move closer. She knew them of course, she had a place and a label of her own for each of them in her mind. Her mistress - actually, Argo tended to think of Xena more her own personal goddess, dedicated to tending her needs, than a mistress. At first, Argo remembered, the goddess accepted all these women for the sake of the small, light one who occasionally rode behind her on Argo's back. Recently, she had begun to accept them on her own account, and Argo had relaxed around them as she sensed her goddess' acceptance.
A few days ago all that had changed. All she could sense from her leather-clad goddess was great grief and anger as she raced into the high mountains without the little one. This was bad, for the little one had been good for the goddess. On the way back to this village, Argo had been deliberately skittish and hard to handle, for she hated the awful bloodlust she could sense in her goddess. The mare had forgotten how much she hated when her goddess felt like that, and she had grown to love the small one for the way she had calmed that lust in the goddess. But now she was gone. Her goddess too, leaving her orders to let no-one near her.
Argo had not been jealous when her goddess left on another horse, for the bloodlust had swamped her, and she rode off dragging the light one behind the dumb brute as she whipped it into a gallop. The sadness these old friends felt depressed her. She wondered if the goddess was ever coming back, but until she did, the mare would do as she had been told. So she shied away from them all, even though her belly was chafed and her mouth sore.
She had liked the one that smelt of horse even before the goddess had told her it was all right to let any of them touch her. She didn't mind the quiet one who now had a cloth on one arm either, but there was new threat arriving. She didn't like the smell. She knew it, but had never liked it. The voice grated on her sensitive ears. She jerked her head up and stared hard at him. This had the effect of showing the white of her eyes. "Uh-oh..." murmured the horse-woman.
A big, sweaty, meaty hand was stretched out towards her. It stank of fear. She whickered nervously and shuffled her hind legs. The horse-woman and the cloth-woman muttered to each other, but still, the walking collection of cutlery and kitchen utensils approached. Argo tossed her head and whinnied, she had orders - "Don't let anyone get close enough to grab your reins or saddle, girl, unless I'm here with ya. Ya got that ?"
"See, you've got to have that touch," he said between clanks, and he lunged for the reins.
Argo had had enough, and she reacted instantly. She settled back on her haunches and wheeled towards him, pawing the air with her front hooves, just as the goddess had taught her to do to clear the battlefield around them. She felt her hoof connect with something bony, and there was an almighty clatter of metal which made her rear up to her full height. As she realised that silence had descended, she dropped to the ground and looked about her. There was the heap of tin cans on the ground, still and silent at last, but the smell was as bad as ever. With a toss of her head Argo wheeled away and trotted off to a safer distance.
"Zeus what an idiot!" sighed Damia heavily.
"I'll get Neaera," offered Ephiny.
"She's no use to Argo even if we could catch her!"
"No Hippodamia! For him!"
"Huh?" she snorted as the regent stormed away. She put her boot against Joxer's side and pushed. No response. "Oh I see. Him!"

Three days after the Bitterest

Ago had come trotting back to the village early that morning, driven by the need for easy food. During the day, Hippodamia spent as much time as she could near the mare, but Argo showed no sign of reneging on Xena's orders. The stocky woman's heart ached more and more as the day wore on as she watched the palomino's discomfort grow, for she had loved Argo long before she had begun to like Xena. By the afternoon, she found she had to wipe tears of frustration from her eyes before she could return to the forge to finish up her work. Again she encountered Solari leaving for a trick on watch.
"It's okay Joxer," boomed the second-in-command, slapping him on the back as she passed, a grin on her face. "I'll take this slot for you.""Ow! Ow! Not so loud! Not so hard, please!" he whined, pressing a hand to his bandaged head.
Solari grinned as she waved to Damia, who had clearly appreciated the exchange, for the grumpy smith was chuckling to herself as she fanned her fire. The younger woman's smile faded as her thoughts turned to the task ahead of her.
Nearly four days now - more than enough time for the sea to bring the bodies back. The lookouts were posted at intervals along the cliff, so they wouldn't miss anything that washed in farther along the beach. Of course, that was assuming that Poseidon hadn't decided to intervene. Solari knew of at least two occasions when Xena had thwarted the Sea-God's plans from Gabrielle's tales, and who knew how often the Warrior Princess had trod on his toes before she had met the bard. They certainly would never have heard it from Xena, who could never be accused of being garrulous about her success in pitting her wits against the Gods.
Solari momentarily put these gloomy thoughts out of her mind as she neared the cliff, admiring the tall, lithe figure of the young Amazon on watch, leaning on her bow. She had blossomed from a gangly child into a graceful young woman in the last few years, and was now the best archer in the village. A serious and self-contained girl, Solari had no idea whether she found men or women more attractive, all she knew was that her heart was Laïs' for the asking - and how she wished the archer would ask!
"Another wildly exciting watch then, Laïs?"
The younger woman turned and shook her head glumly, her coppery hair glinting in the sunshine.
"Lots of seagulls and a school of dolphins. They saved my life. Only for them I'd have died of boredom."
"Go get some food, then," smiled Solari. She turned to watch her go, and then she heard an impossible sound. A rushing waterfall. Impossible, for there never had been a waterfall anywhere along these cliffs, and she had lived all her life near them. She hadn't imagined it, for Laïs too, had heard something and turned back, frowning, to join her.
"What the Hades!" they chorussed as they looked down to the beach below. The two Amazons looked on in disbelief as they saw Xena and Gabrielle in the sea near the water's edge embracing each other. Both women rubbed their eyes and looked again. This time they were splashing about in the water.
"Praise Artemis!" said Solari. "Quick, Laïs, run back to the village and tell them the news. Bring horses. And blankets!" she said, her last words being addressed to her companion's retreating form, for lanky, long-legged Laïs was the fastest runner in the village. Whoops of joy alerted her to the arrival of the other lookouts who were now converging on Solari for further orders. The second-in-command punched the air bove her head with her fist, her face split with a huge grin as they neared her. In seconds they were hugging each other, jumping up and down with glee.

"Why in Tartarus d-d-did we do th-th-that?" asked Gabrielle as they trudged up the beach to the very long path to the clifftop, facing into a rather bracing breeze.
"D-d-dunno," stuttered Xena through her chattering teeth. "Just seemed like a good idea at the time.
"Ah! It w-w--as y-y-your id-d-dea then?"
"No, it wa-wa-was yours!" snapped the waterlogged warrior.
"Oh, no!'' wailed Gabrielle.
"What's wrong?"
"I'm starting to ch-ch-hafe now!" The bard was tugging at her top,
inspecting her breasts.
"It's the s-s-salt water, what d-d-did you expect?" muttered Xena, turning away in confusion at the sudden heat that flooded her at the sight of extra bardic cleavage.
"You should have thought of that before you started f-f-flapping around like a seal!" snapped Gabrielle.
Xena took a deep breath and counted to XX, before she replied.
"You haven't lived 'til you've walked a mile or three in wet leather," she growled as he estimated how far it was back to the village, Argo and her spare, dry, leathers.
Gabrielle stopped and whirled round to face the bedraggled warrior. Her wet tunic and boots, along with every other piece of leather on her body looked black. Every square inch of it creaked and squelched as she ground to a halt in front of the bard. Her dark hair was plastered to her head, water still dripped from her chin and trickled into her cleavage. That had to be uncomfortable beyond belief, thought Gabrielle, but Gods how wet hair emphasised those cheekbones. She quickly suppressed the chuckle that was gurgling in the base of her throat as she noticed Xena's eyes narrow dangerously.
"Yeah, you're a sight for sore eyes all right," she commented dryly, adding mentally, that there would also be some pretty sore places on the warrior's body. She wouldn't mind offering to rub some salve on them, and not for humanitarian reasons alone, but she wasn't sure how Xena would receive such a suggestion.
"Ha. Ha."
Xena couldn't manage anything wittier, for Gabrielle wasn't exactly the picture of perfect grooming herself, and she had been thrown by the heat in her blood and the thoughts the wet bard had stirred in her. The cute baby face was made younger and more vulnerable by her slicked back hair. The protective impulses this aroused in Xena were neither maternal nor sisterly. Her reaction to the sodden top moulded to young woman's bust and the dark skirt clinging to her shapely thighs was, quite simply, erotic appreciation verging on lust. Then her blood ran cold, as recent memories surfaced, and she wondered how she would be received by the Amazons whose Queen she had tried to kill.
"Xena?! If you don't move soon you'll rust on the spot!"
"Don't be stupid Gabrielle, bronze doesn't rust!" she snapped, as she struck out for the path at the foot of the cliffs.
"Well what's that green stuff you see on roofs then, huh?"
"Verdigris!" she flung back over her shoulder.
"Xena?"
"WHAT?"
"Will you slow down, I can't keep up with you, my legs aren't as long as yours, you know!"
Xena did know, she had spent enough time - covertly she hoped - admiring the way those sturdy little limbs had firmed and sculpted in the course of their journeys.
"Sorry, I was just thinking," she offered by way of apology as she shortened her long stride.
After a few minutes at the slower pace the bard got her breath back. "Well, what were you thinking then?"
Xena stopped dead on the track, allowing Gabrielle to catch up to her. She stood beside her, looking up into her face. She recognised the subtle signs that told her Xena had been having what she called a conscience conversation, and waited for the dark woman to speak her thoughts.
"I was just thinking, the last they saw of us was me in blind fury, on that horse...with you..." Xena's voice wavered, but she gathered herself. "How can I begin to explain..."
"Mmmmm, I see what you mean," she said. She screwed her face up into what she hoped would pass for a pensive expression for little before putting Xena out of her misery. "Just leave the talking to me, then. It's what I'm best at, right?" Gabrielle offered with a twinkle in her eye.
Xena nodded gratefully, and guiltily. Zeus, would she ever get the hang of explaining herself to anyone other than Gabrielle? Then her eyes widened in surprise as the bard slipped an arm around her clammy, leather-clad waist. "I'd hardly do this if we hadn't worked things out, would I?"
"Nope," agreed Xena, and she gave a lopsided grin as he slipped her own arm around her friend's shoulders, hoping that the hammering of her heart wasn't audible from this distance.
"And they'll be able to see this a mile...."
The hullabaloo at the cliff top drowned out he rest of what she was going to say. The pair looked up and waved to the obviously delighted Amazons who had just arrived to help.
Xena smiled back at Gabrielle. "You got that one right!"
"Looks like we'll make that bath sooner than we thought," she grinned back, and they struck off up the path again to meet the rescue party.

Gabrielle was riding behind Xena, as they had decided during their ascent of the cliff path. It was the most obvious way they had of stating that the rift was healed. The assembled Amazons cheered loudly, and Joxer - poor Joxer - could only scratch his head incomprehendingly. He couldn't figure why Gabrielle would ride behind Xena after all that had happened, especially when there was a spare horse.
Snuggling as close to Xena as the armour would allow was the next best thing to the Elysian Fields right now as far as Gabrielle was concerned. The bard was begining to feel warm again, partly thanks to the blanket she was wrapped in, but mostly, she figured, thanks to Xena's body heat. Best of all, she even had a valid excuse for wrapping her arms around the warrior's waist due to being nervous of this unfamiliar beast.
"You sure you're okay?" she asked softly.
"Yeah, fine."
"But you're still shivering," observed the bard, concerned that the blanket wouldn't stop Xena catching cold. The warrior, though she was not often ill, made a very demanding patient.
"We're facing into the wind, Gabrielle," she replied gruffly to hide her lie. The blanket was warm enough, it was the young woman's arm around her waist was the cause of the shivers.
"Sooner we get you into that bath the better, then."
"Yeah, but I gotta see to Argo first."
A smiling Ephiny came forward to meet them and she soon had Gabrielle clutched in a one-armed hug. From her vantage point on horseback Xena spotted the stocky smith and her little apprentice.
"Damia..."
"She's near enough Xena, just whistle!"
The sound pierced through the hubbub and in a few moments, hearing an excited whinny and the thunder of hooves, Xena launched herself into a somersault off the horse's back to meet Argo. Damia and Syra were right behind her.
"We'll take care of her if you just tell her it's okay Xena," offered the smith. "She wouldn't even let us get the tack off her."
"Yeah I know. I want to check her myself. Here Argo! Good girl!!"
Xena's keen eye swept over her beloved warhorse, and she groaned as she went to take off the bridle and saddle, "I'm so sorry, girl!"
Damia was at last able to slip a halter over Argo's head and the mare was now nuzzling the grey-haired smith as if she'd just recognised who she was. Shaking her head at her apprentice, she reached out to start unfastening Xena's armour as the warrior dumped the saddle on the ground and ran her hands all over the horse's legs, picking up her feet to check them.
"This'll get in a right old state if we don't do something! You get dunked in the sea then?" Damia hated to see good armour plate abused.
"Yup."
It was as well she knew all the tricks for quick release of the bronze plates, as Xena had no intention of stopping to help.
"Here Syra, take these back to the workshop." Damia piled the plates on top of the saddle her apprentice was carrying and Syra staggered off with her load.
"How in Hades did she get that gash??!!" Xena glared at Damia as if the smith had been personally responsible for the wound. A resounding crash interrupted the smith's reply. Both of Argo's admirers turned to look for the source of the noise which was continuing, albeit on a reduced level. Damia looked back at Xena.
"Guess!" she suggested dryly.
Xena's eyebrow rose slowly as she watched the hapless Syra try to survive the asssitance she was being offered.
"Joxer," she stated. "How?"
"He was so cocksure he could catch her when I couldn't. Argo reared up and hit him on the head. Must have caught it on that ridiculous helmet. He was out for several hours I heard," she added cheerfully as she noticed Xena's face darken.
"Several hours?"
Damia nodded, grinning. As she straightened up, Xena's mouth was beginning to twitch. By the time she and Hippodamia led Argo off to the stable, they were both howling uncontrollably.

Now dressed in her Amazon leathers, Gabrielle nodded to Xena - also freshly bathed and dressed and in her spare leathers - who took the seat behind her. They were on a small dais and the whole village had gathered to hear their story. It was the best way to do it - the only way, really - as Gabrielle had concluded after discussion with Ephiny. Xena had agreed.
The warrior knew it would be difficult and painful for them both and she hadn't got the words, but at least she wouldn't be ducking any blame for her crimes. She was never comfortable when Gabrielle told of their adventures in an inn of an evening, but here, there was no escape, for she had to face these Amazons she respected if she wanted to maintain her self-respect.
She found a defence at last - a rather ironic one - while still watching the Amazons to assess their reactions to the story, she tuned out the voice she loved so dearly and let her mind wander where it would.
It would want to go there!
The bath.
Xena had fussed over Argo as long as she possibly could, and was relieved to find Gabrielle already in the tub. One temptation less to deal with, but the remainder was bad enough. Keeping her hands strictly to herself while washing Gabrielle's back, then having to stay relaxed and not react as the bard washed hers. Trying not to slide to the bottom of the tub in a heap as Gabrielle washed her hair, then keeping her mind - and hands again - in the right place as she returned the compliment. Her self-control completely used up after this, Xena was first out of the bath, dried off and dressed in record time. That way, she had managed to avoid seeing Gabrielle naked.
This was going to make personal hygeine a problem for the forseeable future, given their long-standing, companionable habit of bathing together at any and every opportunity. Her feelings for the young bard had long been way beyond friendship, but the day Gabrielle married Perdicus she had at last realised that she was also in love with the very best friend she had ever had in her violent, tumultuous life.
"It was the strangest place I have ever been in."
Gabrielle's awe-struck voice penetrated the erotic haze of her thoughts. Xena stole a glance at the bard's profile.
"You could kill someone - even someone you love very much," and here, Gabrielle looked around at Xena, expecting her to be lost in her dark thoughts as she had been every time until now. Instead she met the warrior's intense blue gaze. "They would be stone dead one moment and the next they'd be alive again," she finished softly and turned back to her audience, for Xena had broken eye contact and dropped her gaze to the floor between her feet, mortally embarassed. Gabrielle took a deep breath and continued her tale.
Ephiny had been watching Xena closely. The warrior's extreme discomfiture was obvious, and the regent had to admit she felt a grudging admiration for her for staying the course, a sitting duck for any Amazon who wanted to spit, shout or hurl anything more substantial than an insult at her. It was costing her dearly, judging by the faraway look in the haunted eyes.
Definitely not a reaction you could expect of Xena, Destroyer of Nations - how much Gabrielle's love had changed her, mused Ephiny.
Xena hoped her shudder hadn't been noticed.
I can't control anything, she thought desperately. I was going to kill her. I would have, only for whatever merciful god or being took us to Illusia. Every bad thing that's ever happened to her has been because of me. I have no idea when I'll lose it again and maybe I will succeed in killing her next time if I do. Oh, gods she thinks we're - I'm - all right again.
And even if I don't injure or kill her, someone else will because she's my friend. And if that doesn't happen, then I'll probably wreck it myself some night. The way I've been feeling about her I'm going to wake up and find her in shock at what body part I'm fondling, or that I'm kissing her like a lover. She's never so much as glanced at another woman that way in the years I've travelled with her. She hasn't even twigged the couples in the village here. And even if she did, why would she want me - the woman responsible for her husband's death.
"A party? Tonight? I don't know...what do you think Xena?"
Gabrielle's question shook her out of her brown study. She met the apprehensive look and raised an eyebrow.
"Party?" she asked to cover her inattentiveness. The story had obviously run its bitter course and reached its bitter-sweet end.
"Yeah, to celebrate....you know?"
"Sure. Why not?"
Xena's answer came through a slow smile. She scanned the cheering Amazons and noted the surprised glance exchanged between Ephiny and Solari. Good, she thought, keep them off balance. A plan was beginning to form, and she stood up to leave the dais.
Gabrielle came over to her, gripped her arm, and asked anxiously,
"Are you really sure about this? I won't mind if there isn't and I know how you..."
"... feel about parties. Yeah," said Xena through her lopsided grin. Then putting her hand on the bard's forearm, she finished her thoughts aloud.
"But this is different. We're here. Together and alive. Let's party."
Gabrielle's face lit up. "I'll just go and see if I can help," she whispered throatily. Then, with her eyes sparkling very brightly, she suddenly stood on tiptoe and planted a kiss on Xena's cheek, and very quickly skipped away to join the bustling Amazons.
"You do that Gabrielle," said Xena thickly to herself, putting her hand to her cheek to cover what she knew must be a bright beacon there - the spot where the woman she loved had kissed her. A party she thought, everyone will eat and drink to excess, sleep late the next day, then with Argo fresh after her enforced rest, she'd be miles away before anyone realised.

Part Two

Eve of Sweetest - A Celebration.

"There you are, Xena! How long have you been lurking in here? Gabrielle's going crazy looking for you. Come on back to the party, food's ready!"
There was a flurry as the warrior put down her quill and tucked some sheets of parchment under a pile of the bard's scrolls.
"She'd really like you back out there with her," cajoled Ephiny.
"Aaah... Ephiny, I'd just be a wet blanket. She'll enjoy it better without me, you know how I am, sitting in a corner wishing I was somewhere else. I'll just put everyone off their food."
"Well, even Warrior Princesses have to eat sometime. You could at least come out and grab a bite to eat, appear sociable, then come back in here and sulk...or whatever." The tension in the older woman's body wasn't lost on the Amazon regent, but the protest Xena was about to make was drowned out by the loud rumble from her stomach.
"See?" grinned Ephiny. "Your stomach agrees with me."
Betrayed by my own gut, Xena's face seemed to say.
"Come on. Stay here much longer and you're going to sound exactly like Gabrielle. When did you last eat for Zeus' sake?"
Feeling her knees wobble as she stood up, Xena realised that the Amazon was right. She hadn't eaten a thing since before Solan died, four days ago, more than that if you included her time in Illusia, and she still wasn't sure how long that had lasted.
"Okay, you win. I'll come willingly. I'm starving as a matter of fact."
"Good," said Ephiny and relieved at not to have to fight this one, she headed for the door.
"Uuuh, Ephiny?"
She turned back to see a rather embarassed Xena, her mouth opening and closing in an effort to form words. Unable to speak out earlier, she was now attempting an apology. Ephiny was touched.
"Just spit it out Xena, you won't offend me. It's what I like best about you - the way I know exactly where I stand wwith you and what you think of me. I like to think that I've always done the same with you."
"I'm really sorry about your arm. I know I was out of control - but that's no excuse and it's not an aplogy. I should know by now that's when I have to stay away from people I care about. I don't know how I can ever make it up to you...."
"Xena. Forget it. If that had been Xenan, not Solan and you'd got in my way..." Ephiny shook her head, momentarily unable to continue. She was touched by the realisation that she was on the list of people that Xena cared about, and moved by receiving an apology from her.
"I think I have an idea how you - and Gabrielle - must have felt. This is only flesh. It'll heal soon enough. Your wounds will take longer." She stood back to survey the taller woman. "It's good to have you back Xena. The real you I mean."
Xena grimaced, wanting to answer but not being able to think of anything to say. At last she settled for a single word as the silence stretched uncomfortably. "Thanks." She followed the blonde woman out of the hut.
She had been unsure for a long time who the real Xena actually was - berserker or rational logician. In the last few hours she was at last starting to accept that she was both. As she had struggled to put her thoughts on paper, she at last realised that the worst part of her was the simply best part's response to her most painful experiences. It was a very uncomfortable place to be, for she was beginning to realise how little control she had over her inner demons, and was now in despair of ever being able to master them fully.
Then she saw Gabrielle smile at her across the bonfire, and she quickly pushed away her dark thoughts and grinned back at the bard, who came round to meet her at a trot.
"Where did you get to? I was beginning to think you'd gone back to Illusia."
"Oh, you know me. Just sitting, thinking."
"Yeah, well you've done enough of that for one night. Especially tonight."
"I know, I know. I did so much thinking I forgot to eat, so now I'm hungry enough to eat you to standstill!" she joked.
"We'll see about that! Come on there's plenty, even for both of us."
Catching Ephiny's eye she left Xena loading her plate and went over to talk to the regent.
"What is it, Ephiny?"
"Does she seem okay to you?"
"Well, yeah, fine for someone who's been through death and resurrection again," she quipped.
"She didn't want to leave the hut, but her belly beat her to it. She'd been writing something and she put it away in a hurry. Seemed pretty jumpy to me."
"Writing?" Gabrielle frowned. Xena wrote brief notes and shorter lists. She wrote as little as possible, as a rule, and her style was the most concise that the bard had ever seen. She looked around and spotted her friend sitting at a table with Joxer and Solari. The warrior was chomping her way steadily through a small mountain of food, so Gabrielle went over to join the trio. She shuffled up on the bench to sit close to Xena, and snatched a tasty morsel from the platter, earning a mock glare from the ice-blue eyes. "Look, Xena, what's the problem? Everyone here is celebrating the fact that you two are back together, so why not give us a song? I'll do harmony with you if you like," offered Joxer.
Xena choked on the mouthful of wine she had just swallowed, and Gabrielle pounded her on the back, grateful that the warrior's armour was in Damia's shop for cleaning. As she did, she noticed telltale inkstains on Xena's fingers and decided that Ephiny's story merited checking out.
"Lay off it Joxer! Will you let Xena eat in peace? She hasn't had a square meal in days," said Solari, elbowing him in the ribs.
"No, really Solari, she's quite good you know, I've heard her and she's almost as good as me. A duet would be pretty cool."
"Joxer!" snapped Gabrielle, her face flushing with temper, as she felt Xena stiffen beside her.
"Yes, Gabrielle?" he answered, grinning, the bandage on his head making him seem even more fatuous than usual. He was ready, willing, but probably not able to do anything for the redhead he worshipped like a goddess.
"Xena sings only when she feels moved to, or for a very important occasion. Singing is not something she does for for show, it means a lot to her."
"Yeah well, I would have thought that this meant..."
Solari grabbed him by the arm. "Joxer, look they're starting to play again. Will you dance with me?" she asked brightly.
"Sure, just a sec. You see this seems like a pretty important..."
"NOW, Joxer!" said Solari, standing up and dragging him to his feet with a clatter of mismatched armour. "I've been hearing all evening about what good a dancer you are."
"Really?" Joxer seemed pleased at this assessment of his terpsichorean skills.
The dark-haired Amazon nodded vigorously at him. "Sorry to take him away from you, ladies...."
"Oh, no problem, enjoy yourselves," smiled Gabrielle.
"Keep him as long as you can stick it," muttered Xena under her breath. "Greater love hath no Amazon for her Queen than she dance with Joxer all night and thereby spare the Warrior Princess' nerves," sighed the bard.
Xena exploded. It was good job there was no-one sitting opposite them now, for they would have been decorated with a mouthful of roast venison. At last the warrior stopped laughing and wiped her eyes. "Thanks for saving me from that."The bard's eyes were twinkling mischievously. "You're a much better singer than he is. And I know what it means to you. I'm fine with it if you don't want to sing. C'mon, Xena, let's join the others."
Picking up her wine, Xena strolled after Gabrielle, and managed to mingle quite successfully, to her own and everyone else's surprise. Joxer was working his way around the Amazons that Solari was recruiting to keep the well-meaning dolt from trampling all over the fresh emotional wounds both women were carrying.
Xena's initial irritation with him turned to amusement as she found herself commiserating with his previous partners, and regaling them with her own store of Joxer stories.
To the bard's delight, her friend seemed to be spending equal portions of time laughing at their tales and making them laugh in return. At Gabrielle's instigation, Ephiny joined them to make sure Xena was kept occupied while she sneaked a little time to herself in the hut to investigate the Amazon's story.
She lit a candle, and sure enough, now pushed under the scrolls were the parchment sheets she had left out on the table earlier. They were folded, and her name was written on the outside one in Xena's neat, compact hand. The inside ones were covered with the warrior's words. She picked it up it and began to read.

I was holding Solan when I closed my eyes. He had just called me mother and told me that he loved me. Words I thought I would never hear. I could have died happy at that moment.
But I didn't.
I opened my eyes, and I was holding you in my arms. We were back in our own world again. You pulled away from me and looked into my face with those searching eyes.
"We're home," you said.
Just two words from my voluble bard on such an occasion, but there was so much in them.
"We."
We hadn't been "we" for so long. Oh, there were moments, but mostly I felt that there was something wrong, and I had no idea what it was, or how to get you to talk about it. Ironic. Not being able to get you to talk.
"We."
A team again, no secrets, no walls. No pretending to myself that you were a little girl who needed to be protected from life. You are so far from the wide-eyed kid who followed me to Amphipolis nearly three years ago. You are a young woman who has learned to deal with grief and suffering and death, and you do that with such dignity. I'm going to try never to forget that.
"Home."
Back in a world, that for all its imperfections and faults, we both understand and can cope with.
"Home."
The haven of peace I've found having you at my side, shining the light of your love into the darkest recesses of my soul. The only home I really want and will ever need.

Gabrielle's knees buckled at these words and she sat down heavily, blinking her tears away furiously.

"We're home," you said so simply and so wisely.
"At last," I said, at a loss for words as usual.
At last, for in the blackest hours of being lost in my grief and rage, my greatest anger, the sharpest pain was losing you. Or rather, losing sight of you, for you were really always there, I was just dazzled by the image I had made of you for myself. I had stopped looking at you to see what you were really feeling.
"At last."
You see what a struggle it is for me to conquer my dark urges, you have inspired me to go on fighting them. It never occurred to me that you had to fight just as hard to be as good as you are. It never occurred to me that sometimes you fail too, because you're tired or you hurt too much. Or because you love too much. Because you love me too much.
"At last," I said, and you flung yourself into my arms again. I could have died happy then, too...

Gabrielle's heart began to pound and her mouth went dry.

...as we splashed about in the water's edge on the seashore.
But I didn't.
I know we'd have had to come back here, even if Ephiny hadn't posted a lookout. To let them know you were alive. For me to get Argo. You did all the talking, as usual. I didn't trust myself to speak in case I blew it all again, saying the wrong things.
They wanted to celebrate our return, even Joxer, who had done his best trying to stop me killing you. They wanted to party. So I smiled and nodded, for I know how you enjoy parties - almost as much as I hate them. After all I've done to you, it's the least I can do for you. Indulge you.
You kept looking at me, shaking your head from time to time in wonder at this new-found conviviality of mine. At last your glances got less frequent, and I decided to slip away and get this over and done with before you'd notice I'd gone. But not without an explanation first. After all that's happened, I can't walk away without a word. But I know I won't be able to say it out loud, so I'm writing it down. Forgive the conceit, I'm illiterate and inarticulate compared to you, but it's the only way I can say it and make sense.
You once told me that friends stick by each other in times of trouble, and by the Gods, you've done that for me more often than anyone should ever have to. More often than I deserve.
I liked to think I was doing the same for you, and you thanked me so often I fooled myself into thinking I was. Now, in the calm I feel after our time together in Illusia, I'm thinking more clearly than I have ever done in my life. Now I see so plainly that all the worst troubles of your young life have been brought on you by me.
You died because I dragged you into a war zone.
Callisto kidnapped you to get at me, and tried to kill you.
To take revenge on me, she went after you again, and killed your beloved Perdicas.
Left to my own devices, I would have got the garrison, myself and you killed by the Horde.
In my blind, bitter hatred of Caesar, I forgot you. Missed out on the danger around you. If I hadn't been so obsessed with me and Caesar, I'd have spotted what Khrafstar was up to, and Dahok would never have gotten his filthy hands on you. You would never have had Hope, and had to suffer for her as you did. So you see, if I'd been looking after you like a true friend should, Solan would be alive.
In my grief I lashed out, not at the evil thing that had killed all my joy, but at the nearest thing - the best and brightest thing left in my stinking life.
You.
You'd think I'd have learned not to do that by now. I think I never will.
That's why I'm bad for you Gabrielle. You're better off without me. So I'm going.
I really think I can make a go of it now, with all I've learned from you. I won't have anyone to tell the tales of what I do, but that's okay. I was never comfortable with the applause you used to win for me. But sometimes, I hope you may hear a traveller tell of how he was helped by a dark, silent woman, and you'll know I'm still able to do good.
I lied to you on your wedding day, Gabrielle. It really would have been goodbye if Perdicas had lived and you'd settled down to have a family. You wouldn't have needed a broken-down warlord hanging round your house like a bad smell.
So, I won't - no, I can't - lie to you any more.
Goodbye Gabrielle.
Goodbye, because I love you too much to stay and hurt you more.

Xena

Her stomach churned at the last lines. She was too upset to cry. How could she think of leaving me? After all we've been through together. After all I've done to Xena.
I betrayed her in Chin to a monstrous tyrant who had executed the woman who had saved Xena's life and healed her crippled limbs.
I denied Xena's uncanny and proven ability to sense evil, and refused to face the the fact that sometimes you have to be cruel to be kind.
We're in this together, both of us, up to our necks in blame. It's the road to Tartarus and I paved it with my good intentions. Xena spilt rivers of blood - on my behalf - to keep me away from this road and Tartarus.
And now that she realises how much - and how - she loves me, she wants to show me by walking away from me. Now I realise how much - and how - I love her, how can I stop her leaving? The bard buried her face in her hands for a while, racking her brains.
"Gabrielle? You okay?"
"Aaah, Ephiny! Yeah, I guess so. It's just... everything.. catching up on me." The bard folded the parchment and stuffed it back under the scrolls. "Did I overreact? Was it something private of hers? I just had this weird feeling about her, I'm sorry if it made you pry on her."
"No it's okay. I would have seen it eventually, it was for me," said the bard quietly.
"She's on a roll with Joxer stories out there, so you'll be okay for a little longer if you need it. She has everyone in stitches. Will I tell her you'll be back soon if she asks?"
At the bard's nod, Ephiny left her and went back outside. The buzz of conversation was a little louder and the musicians were taking a break.
Solari had found the perfect adoring partner for Joxer - Damia's mousy little apprentice who had little experience of men and was clearly impressed by the bandage. The regent appreciated her second-in-command's initiative, but she would have to make sure the dark-haired woman would guide poor Syra a little better in the study of manhood than offering Joxer as a typical example of masculinity.
Ephiny caught sight of Xena grinning broadly into her goblet, as lanky young Laïs doubled up with laughter - no doubt another golden Joxer-saves-the-Warrior-Princess-and-the bard moment, she thought. Her own lips curved in amusement as she recalled her favourite of the evening, the death of Joxer during the day which had repeated endlessly.
"Well, he did make a good suggestion, the day started with the cock crowing, so I killed the cock. But it didn't work. The day went on repeating and I was going insane trying to figure out how to get us all out of this loop,
and then it dawned on me. The first thing that happened was Joxer came into the stable with the damn goose eggs. I was ready the next - no the same morning - for the I dunno, eleventh, the twentieth time. I just wanted it to be the last. So the second he woke me up, I sat up and killed him."
The warrior's droll, deadpan delivery, followed by a satisfied sniff and a slug of wine had them chuckling until someone asked how she had done the deed. In reply she reached for her hip and mimed throwing her chakram. "Ten paces. Couldn't miss 'im. Middle of the chest."
Complete disintegration followed this wry commentary, and over an hour later Ephiny found herself chuckling at the memory. A small voice behind her stopped her.
"Ask her to sing will you? She would for you.""You - all of us - have just spent the evening stopping Joxer plaguing her to sing."
"I know, but that was because I knew she wasn't in the mood to sing something cheerful and she didn't want to spoil the fun for everyone."
"And there I was thinking she was just being Xena," quipped Ephiny, trying to lighten the sombre mood implied by the bard's tone of voice.
"You mean awkward and unco-operative? No, she was actually looking out for me. But you know what? I'd really like to hear her sing, especially if it is sad. It's how I feel right now."
"Of course Gabrielle, if that's what you want," nodded Ephiny, moved to quick agreement by the catch in the bard's voice. "Xena!" she called across the fire.
"Yup?""I know what it means to you, and it would mean a lot to me - to all of us, actually - if you'd sing for us now."
"Ephiny, I don't think I could sing something happy right now, I really don't. I would if I could..."
"Then do it for me, will you Xena? Please?" asked the bard, her eyes glistening in the firelight as she stepped forward from the shadows behind Ephiny.
"Gabrielle...I don't want to spoil the party for you... for everyone."
The crowd had gone silent, listening to this exchange.
"It won't spoil anything for me. I'm feeling very sad right now, and I can't think of anyone who could sing that for me the way you can. Please."
Xena blinked hard and looked over at Ephiny, who nodded her assent. Clearly thrown by this request, the warrior tossed the last of her wine back in a large gulp and wiped her mouth on the back of her hand. She handed the goblet to Laïs, and struggled to compose herself, studying her boots intently for a while. She looked up at last, straight at the bard.
"A few days ago I stood beside another kind of fire. I should have sung for my son, but I had lost so much more along with Solan, I wasn't able to. So tonight, I sing this for Solan, for all that I lost....for all that you lost too, Gabrielle."
She closed her eyes and began to sing. She had reached the end of the first line when she felt the light touch on her arm. Without having to look, she knew it was Gabrielle, and she took the small hand in her own. She could feel the tremors in the younger woman's body, and opening her eyes, she looked directly into the bard's upturned face and sang another verse to her. It took all her self-control to sing the dirge to its bitter end. As she reached the last phrase, she pulled the bard to her and wrapped her in her arms. Gabrielle placed her hands lightly on the broad back, and turning her head away from the Amazons gathered round the fire, rested it on Xena's chest.
She could not only hear, but feel the low note resonate through the contact of hand and cheek. As it died away, she tightened her grip on the warrior's body, and felt Xena's lips pressed to the crown of her head in response. Ephiny shook herself to break the melancholy spell of the mourning song, and looked about to catch Solari's eye. She motioned her second-in-command to start breaking up the party.
Keeping an eye on the warrior and bard, still wrapped in each other's arms and griefs, she added her encouragement to Solari's to clear the party away. In minutes, the Amazons had banked the fire down and had melted into thin air, taking the remains of the celebration with them. As she made her way past the grieving pair, she placed her good hand on Xena's shoulder.
Gabrielle was clearly still crying. "Good night you two, sleep well," she murmured and she went to make sure Joxer would leave them alone.
Xena's tears flowed soundlessy as she memorised the feel of the bard in her arms, for this was the last time she would hold her so. Embers shifted and crackled, spitting sparks as trapped resin caught light. It was a long few minutes before either of them moved. At last there was a loud sniff and Gabrielle stirred in her arms. Reluctantly, just a little, the warrior loosened her grip and lifted her chin from the bard's head.
"Xena?"
"Yeah?"
"The worst part of that night was standing there by myself. Not having you hold me like this. I don't think I could handle that another time. Promise me you'll do everything in your power never to leave me alone like that again?"
Xena went very still, she had pledged to herself not to lie to Gabrielle again, and here she was, caught on the horns of a dilemma. Be truthful and tip her hand about leaving, or play along, and make complete and utter hypocrisy of what she had said and sung just now.
"Xena, I'd rather be dead than travel without you. I won't go back to Poteideia if you leave, I don't fit in there now, even less than I did before I left to follow you. And I'd go to the ends of the earth to find you if you walked out on me now," said the bard as she leaned back in the warrior's arms to look up into the stony face above her.
"You weren't supposed to find that until morning," said Xena hoarsely, staring straight over Gabrielle's head, afraid to look into her eyes in case her resolve weakened. "Doesn't matter, I'm going any way."
"Didn't you hear what I just said?"
"You've read what I wrote. I'm bad for you, Gabrielle, you're better off without me. I've caused you nothing but pain."
"Hey, I'm the one who pushed us both off the cliff, so I'm not exactly blameless here you know. But this isn't a contest to decide who's to blame for what happened. I thought we'd worked that out in Illusia, forgiven each other for what we'd both done to each other, and decided we were going to start with a clean slate. Look at me Xena!" said the bard forcefully, reaching up to put her hands on the warrior's cheeks and tilt her head down.
"You're all the family I'll ever want or need, Xena," she whispered, as she saw the tears standing in the blue eyes spill down the warrior's cheeks.
"I don't think you know what I meant by that Gabrielle," she managed at last.
"Yes, I do. I'm not a little girl any more, you said so yourself in that letter. And if I said so in the morning, Ephiny would hand over her crown to me. I know what can happen between two Amazons. So, do what you did last year before you came back to life. I know you want to, and I want you to as well."
Xena's arms slipped from round the bard's waist and her eyebrow rose as her mouth opened soundlessly. She straightened to her full height and leaned away from her.
"It was you, wasn't it? I thought for the longest time it was just Autolycus taking advantage of the situation, but when I read the letter..." Gabrielle faltered, she had been so sure she'd figured it out, but Xena's non-plussed reaction gave her pause for thought. "You mean it was him kissing me then? It wasn't you? "
The disappointed tone and the way the bard's face fell restored Xena's powers of speech.
"Oh Gods, yes! Yes, it was me. At least at first it was me, but I didn't bargain on that male reflex response thing, I thought I was in control.
Before I could stop him he'd grabbed your butt, and I couldn't think straight. All I could feel was... well, not what I imagined I'd feel when I kissed you for the first time like that... it was as well you broke the kiss before I ... well ...he went any further..."
"Xena?" interrupted Gabrielle, smiling with relief.
"....and did ... what Gabrielle?" She leaned in a little closer and both eyebrows had risen until they had disappeared under her hair."You're babbling." Irony laced this amused comment from voluble bard to taciturn warrior.
"I am? But I really couldn't have stopped him if..."
"Shut up, Xena," she ordered. "I'll know it's really you this time. Kiss me. Now."
Hardly daring to believe her luck, Xena leaned down and claimed the bard's lips, as gently as she had intended when she had had to borrow Autolycus' body. Gabrielle tightened her grip on the warrior's waist and as the kiss deepened, and they devoured each other hungrily, Xena wound her arms back about her beloved bard. They finally had to come up for air, and Gabrielle could feel Xena's body sag against hers as the tension drained out of it.
"C'mon, you're exhausted, and so am I."
"Yeah."
Stumbling over each other's feet, they made their way back to their hut. Xena was so bleary-eyed that Gabrielle had to unlace boots and tunic for her.
"Get into bed."
"No, I hate sleeping against the wall, you know that."
"You are tonight. Get in."
"I'll feel penned in. I'll toss and turn. You won't get a wink of sleep," she said sitting at the edge of the bed in her shift as the bard unlaced her own boots.
"I don't care, you aren't going to go anywhere without me knowing about it the second you move. Get in!"
The bard stood up to her full height and tried to look as intimidating as it was possible for her to be when barefoot.
"I'm not going anywhere without you Gabrielle, and I promise I'll do everything in my power never to leave you alone like you were at our children's funeral again. I swear, on Lyceus' grave."
Gabrielle smiled and went over to kiss her.
"Thank you Xena. But just the same, humour me, get in."
Within minutes of acquiescing to the bard's command, and after exchanging a few sleepy kisses, the exhausted pair were curled up alseep in each other's arms.

The Sweetest Day Begins with Hangovers

Ephiny had checked in on them an hour after breakfast and wasn't surprised to see them still dead to the world after their ordeal. She had relayed this state of affairs to Joxer, who had decided to take to the road again and wanted to say goodbye to them - well to Gabrielle really, he still wasn't too sure what to make of Xena and was less sure what to make of Ephiny. How she could be this sympathetic to someone who had broken her arm and nearly killed her Queen escaped him completely.
Syra was keeping him company, gazing adoringly at him - much to Ephiny's annoyance - as he saddled his nag. She really would have to have a stern talk with the girl, Damia was letting her grow like a weed, with never a care about the child's personal development. Laïs, the rangy runner, was hovering nearby, struggling to suppress her amusement at the apprentice's crush. I should remind her about the summer she had a crush on Hydrophobos the Unwashed, thought Ephiny sourly.
Xena came strolling over to the small group.
"Joxer," she said holding her hand out to him. "Thanks for all you did. You know, trying to stop me killing Gabrielle."
He eyed the hand suspiciously. "Yeah, well I did it for Gabrielle you know, so you really needn't thank me."
"I know you did, but I want to thank you just the same. She means the world to me. You were very brave to try to stop me when I was in that state."
"Yeah. Well if she means so much I'll never understand why you'd try to kill her. I could never do that."
"Joxer!" said Ephiny sharply.
"It's okay, Ephiny. I don't think I'll ever understand why either. Thanks any way, safe journey." Xena held her hand out again, and Joxer still looked askance at it.
"Well, I think I have some idea of what Xena must have gone through, Joxer. Some day when you have a child of your own you might too. But then again maybe not. Maybe it takes another mother to understand what they both went through," said the regent sternly as Xena took her hand back, turned on her heel and walked away.
Looking abashed, Joxer called out after her. "Bye Xena. Take good care of her." He looked sheepishly at Ephiny and held his hand out. The regent kept hers firmly at her side.
"Try to engage your brain before opening your mouth a little more often Joxer, especially around someone whose fighting skills are as lethal as Xena's," with a grin Ephiny held her good hand out and took Joxer's "Like she said, thanks for all your help, and safe travelling."
After bestowing a fatuous grin on the hapless Syra, he mounted the nag and rode off. Ephiny watched with her until he had disappeared over the ridge, then seeing that the girl was on the verge of tears, she decided to give her an occupation.
"Gods, Syra, don't snivel over him! He survives out there in spite of himself, and he'll be back to plague us soon enough! Now go tell Queen Gabrielle I want to talk to her."
Xena needed to embark on another guilt trip like she needed a hole in the head, and she had noticed the set of the older woman's jaw as she had gone stalking off. Concerned, Ephiny sent Laïs to keep an eye on her.

She was still sitting where Laïs said, brooding near the river bank. Her elbows rested on her knees and her face was buried in her hands. Gabrielle knew her approach had been heard. For all she had practised, she could never manage to sneak up on the keen-sensed Warrior Princess. There was no response when she sat down beside her, so she reached out and put a hand on the dark head.
"Joxer's always running off at the mouth when he's way out of his depth. Did you hear what Ephiny said to him?" she asked gently.
As Xena lifted her head and turned to look into her friend's anxious face, the bard's hand slipped down onto the warrior's back. "Yeah, I heard her."
"I understand too, you know that. It's all behind us now."
"I know. It's not that." Xena turned away to gaze across the river, into the distance towards the cliffs.
"What is it Xena. Tell me. If you can't tell me after all we've been through, then you might as well leave me now."
Xena's head snapped back and she met Gabrielle's gaze intently for a few moments before dropping it. "Ming T'ien," she said quietly addressing the grass at her feet.
"He's part of what's behind us. You lied to me about him, but I lied to you too. We're quits. Forget it, let's move on." Gabrielle moved her hand to Xena's shoulder and squeezed it encouragingly.
"I've gotten over the lie part - mostly. What bothers me is what my motives were for killing him - or rather what you might think they were. It wasn't pure revenge or payment of my debt to Lao Ma. At least I don't think it was."
"He was a brutal tyrant, he had Lao Ma executed and so many of her people imprisoned for no good reason. He would have executed you too, no matter what you'd promised. The kingdom of Chin is better off without him.
Sometimes you're right. Some people deserve to die."
"No Gabrielle, it wasn't just that. It wasn't just me deciding this guy was bad and I was going to take him out. I really meant it when I said I was finished with him. If he'd kept his mouth shut he'd still be alive," she looked pleadingly into Gabrielle's face, willing her to believe the truth of this.
"You were so calm and at peace, like I'd never seen you before. What did he say to destroy that?"
"He didn't have her executed. Gabrielle, he told me he killed her himself."
"Oh Gods! His own mother!" The bard's face went pale.
"I didn't want to kill him then, Gabrielle. Not even then. I thought he didn't know, so I told him that she was his mother. I really believed that living with that knowledge would be worse than death for him," said Xena, her voice thick with reliving the emotion of the moment. She couldn't look at her friend any more, and she dropped her gaze to the grass between her feet again. "He sneered at me, then. He told me he had always known she was his mother. He knew she wouldn't hurt him, and that was why he killed her himself, because he knew she would use her powers against anyone else who tried."
As she paused to gather herself to complete her confession, Xena looked back at the bard, who had now moved away a little. The young woman's eyes were closed and she was breathing through her mouth, her fists clenched.
"He gave me a hair brooch she wanted me to have - her last request. I was holding it, remembering how it had looked when I first put it in her hair, the day she healed my legs. He said she was a sentimental fool who went on crying even as he tore her beating heart from her body. I can't remember how I did it. All I could think of was how fiercely she defended that little boy from the scum that I was then. The next thing I knew, the brooch was sticking out of his temple and he was dead. I could hear you scrambling back over the rubble, so I put him on his throne and picked up the book. Then you came back and I lied to you," she finished, in a choked whisper.
Gabrielle jumped up and ran for the riverbank. Xena waited a few minutes before following her, unsure of how any help from her might be received. She stood a few yards away and waited with her heart pounding, until the bard finished rinsing her mouth and stood up unsteadily. She construed the younger woman's horrified expression and pale face as a judgement on herself.
"I can be packed in a few minutes, just stay here and I'll send someone to get you after I've gone."
"I told you, you aren't going anywhere without me, Xena. You just don't get it do you? Even when you were driven out of your mind by the Furies, you were prepared to kill yourself rather than harm your mother. What Ming T'ien did was unnatural, monstrous and way more evil than anything you've done. If I'd known that, I think I'd have wanted to help you."Xena's eyebrow rose, she was too shocked to speak.
"Yeah. After all I've been through, I'm sure I would."
"Oh Gabrielle, what have I done to you? You never wanted to take life before, you probably never would if it wasn't for me," groaned Xena, reaching out to put a hand on the bard's cheek.
"Thanks to you I've never had to lay my life on the line for my principle of not killing. You've been there as often as you could be, watching my back, and killing to protect me if necessary. More blood on your hands, for me and my principles. I don't think I have the right to expect you go on doing that for me. You've opened my eyes to the fact that there's a great deal of evil in the world, that we have to battle it to make life worth living. And sometimes, as much as I'd like not to, I've realised we may have to kill to do that. I think that's called growing up."
Xena's mouth opened and closed soundlessly, rendered speechless by the logic of her friend's reasoning. Gabrielle took her hand between her own.
"Miss the little girl?" she asked gently. "After all you, got a grown-up woman instead of her."
The warrior could only shake her head in reply.
"Given you something to think about, then?"
A nod.
"You do your best thinking on Argo, and I'm sure she could use some exercise. Why don't you go for a gallop? Give me some time to think too."
"You trust me to ride off on Argo?"
The question had ended on an uncharacteristic warrior squeak.
"Yeah, why not?"
"Not afraid I might run off?"
Gabrielle shrugged. "Oh, I think I can offer a little incentive to make you eager to come back." With a grin, she used one hand to pull Xena closer whereupon she hooked a finger of the other one into the bodice of the warrior's tunic and tugged sharply.
To her delight, Xena found her lips assaulted by the bard's mouth, and cheerfully surrendered to the attack. When the shorter woman let go of the leather suddenly, Xena had to grab her to steady herself.
"Guess you won't be going too far then?" chuckled Gabrielle.
"Nope. I'll be back soon. You can count on it!""

Gabrielle sighed to herself as she closed the door behind her. The sound of a snore from the bed stopped her from launching into a long grumble about not getting a minute's peace all day. She had left the river bank an hour or so after Xena, and come back to try to write about their experience in Illusia. With no success.
It felt as if everyone in the village had interrupted her in a blind panic when they noticed Argo had gone. Try as she might she could neither write nor gather her thoughts, and found herself wishing she had gone off with Xena, who at least knew when she needed quiet time to work on her scrolls without her having to put up a sign saying 'bard at work'.
The penultimate intruder nearly had their head bitten off and that had been Xena herself with some food. The warrior had managed to lighten her mood by joking about the attentive Amazons and her own bad reputation among them. She then had the sensitivity to go and chop wood, in plain sight of all in the village, thus ensuring no-one would need to check up on her, and gave the the younger woman the space she had craved all day.
The last intruder she couldn't chastise. It was Xenan, and he wanted to hear some stories. Ephiny apologised profusely, and Gabrielle hadn't the heart to refuse him. It was dark by the time she got back, and here was Xena, sprawled fast asleep on the bed, sweaty and clammy after her evening's work. After ten minutes of wrestling with boots, leathers and muscular warrior limbs, she managed to get her undressed and into bed so she wouldn't catch a chill.
As she sat down to catch her breath, she realised her thoughts had organised themselves in her subconscious, in spite of - or perhaps because of - all the interruptions. She opened a brand new scroll and began to write steadily, soothed and encouraged by an occasional grunt, sigh, mumble and even snore from the bed. She was yawning when she put down the quill, but the story, painful as it was, had been told.
While she waited for the ink to dry, she got undressed and into an old shift, then took out the warrior's letter to read before she turned in. She could read it calmly now that she knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that Xena wasn't going to walk out. The intensity of the older woman's feelings now seemed to leap off the pages at her, and Gabrielle wondered how she could have been so blind to them, especially as she prided herself on being the one person in the world who could read Xena best.
Growing up. She had done a lot of that recently, and that must be what had opened her eyes, and her mind. Ironic that it took a letter - and sweet Aphrodite, a love letter at that - from the taciturn Xena to make the verbose bard see what had been under her nose all along. She started to read it again.
It was dark when Xena woke at the edge of the bed with her arms empty. She prised her tongue from where it was glued to the roof of her mouth and managed to croak out blearily, "Gabrielle?"
There was a rustle of parchment, and the bard plopped down on the edge of the bed beside her. "I'm right here, sleepyhead."
Xena blinked hard and focused on the red-gold nimbus of Gabrielle's hair until her eyes adjusted to the low light.
"Thought I'd grab forty winks when I got back and you weren't here. Miscalculated. Sorry."
"It's okay, you gave me time to catch up on my writing. I went to tell Xenan some stories, and I found I was able to get it out of my system and onto a scroll when I got back."
Xena spotted her letter in the bard's hand. "Haven't you burned that thing yet?" she growled.
"You mean you've changed your mind, you're leaving after all?" asked Gabrielle in a mock-serious tone.
"I'm going nowhere without you, you know that!" said Xena earnestly.
"That's settled then. I get to keep it," smirked Gabrielle, and then, seeing the warrior's frown, she added, "I only burn it if you go, silly."
Xena groaned. Sometimes she could make no sense of Gabrielle whatsoever. She pulled herself up against the pillows and glared at the bard. "Humour me. Explain this in small words for me, please. We warriors can't cope with the big ones."
"Okay. It took you long enough to let me know how you felt about me. Given your usual way with words, you probably aren't going to be announcing how you feel about me at regular intervals. I keep this, so I can refer to it and remind myself."
Xena leaned back and linked her hands behind her head. "Gabrielle, you know I'm much better at action than I am with words," she drawled seductively.
"Hmmmph!" snorted the bard, her eyebrows rising sceptically. "I wouldn't be too sure after reading this. Mind you, if I have to go through all that again to get you to write me a love letter I'm not sure I'll ever want another from you."
"Love letter?! Gabrielle, I was writing to explain why I was leaving!"
"Yeah, and what was the last thing you wrote before you signed it? Will I read it out loud or is your memory up to it?"
Xena shook her head and glared. "Then you only have to keep the last page."
"Ha! Throw away a letter that screams 'I love you, Gabrielle.' off every page? Okay, then get up, get dressed. Go!" she said with mock severity.
"First, I'll burn it. Then I'll make a bonfire of my scrolls and then get someone to hit me over the head in just the right spot to make me forget everything that's happened in the last three years. Because if you go I'd have to try to wipe you out of my life completely," her eyes were sparkling and her tone had become serious again. "So what's it to be, Warrior Princess?" she asked softly. She leaned forward to close the distance between them, and reached an arm across Xena's body to balance herself.
"Keep it," whispered Xena, unnerved by the bard's speech as much as by her proximity.
"You sure of that now?" she wheedled as she leaned even closer.
"Oh, yeah, absolutely," the cornered warrior murmured.
Gabrielle closed the last few inches and claimed Xena's mouth in a tender kiss. At first afraid to move in case she woke up from an impossible dream, Xena at last began to respond hungrily to it. As she moved her hands from behind her head, they both shifterd and lost their balance. The bard ended up sprawled across the warrior's prone body.
"Mmmm, I like this," she purred, worming her way upwards for another kiss.,br> "Hnnnghh!"
"Are you okay?" she asked anxiously levering herself off Xena at this.
"Well, if you like sleeping in a wet bed any better than I do, go ahead."
"No, I guess not," she sighed and sat up.
"Thought not," gasped Xena as she dived off the bed.
Gabrielle took the opportunity to roll up her now-dry scroll and tidy away her writing materials. She retrieved the letter and put it carefully into a small pouch she kept for special keepsakes. The candle in the lantern was a mere stump, so she decided to let it burn out, and straightened from the tidy table to find herself under Xena's intense scrutiny.
"Now what?" she asked, her eyes narrowing at the uncertain expression on the older woman's face.
"Are you sure this is what you want Gabrielle? We can still be best friends. I'm so much older than you and I'm bad to have around, whatever you say about it being your choice. What if you meet some guy you'd like to settle down and have a family with?" she asked very quietly.
"You know that old legend I like so much? About the two-headed four-legged creature that had only one soul?"
If she had a dinar for every time the bard told it, she'd be wealthy. If she had a dinar for every person the bard moved to tears when she told it, she'd be rich as Croesus. Xena nodded and grinned wryly. "It got chopped in half and now the two creatures are looking for each other to feel whole again. Yeah, I know the one you mean."
"I'm never going to meet some guy, or even some body. I've already found the other half of my soul. You have it," the bard said huskily as she moved closer to the warrior.
Xena swallowed and blinked hard. "I must be the rear end of this creature, then," she joked.
"There's no front or back. Just two parts that walk side by side. The way you and I walk the roads together," said Gabrielle as she wound her arms around the warrior's waist.
"Oh Gods, Gabrielle! I've been in love with you for so long, please be sure this is how you feel too, I couldn't bear it if you were only doing this to please me."
"I made that mistake once - with Perdicas. This is as much for me as it is for you. I'm very sure this time."
The bard proved herself a woman of action as well as of words, and presently, a startled Xena had to lift her mouth from a long, wet kiss to ask a very pertinent question.
"Is Autolycus still alive?" she asked straightening to her full six feet to keep her mouth out of the bard's reach.
"Yeah, why?" muttered Gabrielle as, in the absence of warrior lips to assault, she attacked the soft, warm flesh of a conveniently placed breast.
As she nibbled gently at the little scar that had always fascinated her, she breathed in the heady perfume made of leather, Argo and an evening of chopping wood that mingled with Xena's personal scent.
"Uh, then it's really you grabbing my butt?"
'Yeah, got a problem with that?" she asked, as her hand massaged a saddle-hardened buttock under the shift.
"Only one. Where's your other hand?" growled Xena against the red-gold head burrowed into her bosom.
Gabrielle's laughter spluttered against the ample cleavage, and before the bard knew what was happening she had been swept off her feet and carried, squirming, to their bed.
Once there, she wriggled out of Xena's arms onto the floor, then winding her arms about the taller woman's neck, she pulled her down for another kiss.
The warrior was frustrated by the lack of body contact, so she slipped her hands down under the hem of the shift, drawing Gabrielle closer to her as she stroked the shapely backside. Still unsatisfied, Xena's side of the kiss got hungrier and rougher, her tongue thrusting demandingly, her teeth catching lips greedily. The bard seemed to be enjoying this, giving back as good as she got, until the roaming hands started to slide her shift up and over her hips to her waist, whereupon she went very still in her lover's arms.
Xena's heart sank, and feeling sick to her stomach, she broke away from the embrace. The look of consternation on Gabrielle's face was as sobering as a kick to her gut.
"Was that too fast? I'll stop any time, you know that. Completely, even, if you find that this isn't right for you. I know what you said last night, but the reality is often different from what you imagine it to be. If it's not for you then just say the word and this never happened and it won't happen again. Promise." She was babbling again, she knew, and she could feel her knees begin to wobble. She felt her heart was going to burst, her hope dashed.
"No. No. I mean yes! It has happened. Is happening. It's just...."
"Look Gabrielle, I know you thought you'd be okay with this, but you're only realising what's going to happen and you're not so sure. Or maybe you've realised you're not okay with it at all. If you have, I understand. It's no problem, really," said Xena quietly as she sat down on the edge of the bed before her legs gave way. Resting her elbows on her knees, she buried her face in her hands.
"Oh Xena it's not that at all," reassured the bard as she turned to face the older woman. "I just realised I'm...well to me any way, I suppose most people wouldn't think so. I'm a virgin.... again," she grimaced as she said this. Xena lifted her head from her hands and their eyes met.
"Technically a virgin. I've never been with a woman. I guess you probably have. I mean you're older than me, right? So you have more experience of life and all that. You have, haven't you? Been with a woman? Women, even."
"Yeah," sighed Xena hoarsely, inwardly cursing her policy of complete honesty. There could be such a thing as too much honesty she was discovering. Like right now.
"Women? Plural. As in more than one?"
Cornered by her honesty, Xena could only nod. She feared the next question, for she couldn't lie and say that she hadn't loved any of them. That answer wouldn't do anything to bolster Gabrielle's confidence. Nor would a trite reassurance that being with her would be different to the rest. Her once innocent - no ignorant, for she would always be innocent in Xena's eyes - bard had often laughed like a drain with Xena about guys who tried to hit on her using this line.
"Oh. I thought as much."
Gabrielle's face fell and her gaze dropped to her feet. The crestfallen way she had spoken cut Xena to the quick, and her heart squeezed itself bloodless with fear.
What am I so afraid of? she thought.
And as she answered in strict compliance with her code of honesty, what she hoped were the right words came to her.
"Gabrielle, I'm not going to tell you that none of them meant anything to me, because some of them meant a lot. There were a few others that were fun to be with for a while, the rest... Well, you know what I was like. I used them, like I used Borias. Tonight's different, I've never felt like this before, truly." She paused to take a deep breath to steady her shaking voice. Don't patronise her, she's a woman, not a child. Be honest. She willed the bard to look up.
"Gabrielle, you've got to help me out here. I'm nervous too."
Their eyes locked. Gabrielle's were curious, full of hope.
"I've never made love to the person that carried the other half of my soul. I want it to be perfect for her, and I'm not sure this old warlord can handle that. I'm feeling kind of virginal myself," she finished through a lopsided grin. She wasn't sure what made her feel giddier. The notion that Xena, Warrior Princess, mother of Solan, lover of Lao Ma, of Caesar, of Marcus - to name a few - was made to feel like a nervous bride by a young bard barely out of her teens, or the way Gabrielle's face had lit up with a relieved smile.
"No kidding? You too?"
"No kidding," replied Xena as she held her arms out. "C'mere."
The bard complied, and Xena held her close.
"Feel my heart beat," the warrior said as she took an inkstained hand and placed it over her left breast.
"Does the phrase frightened rabbit ring a bell?" grinned Gabrielle.
"Ding-a-ling," came the laconic reply.
The smiling bard bent down to claim the lips she loved.
This time she helped when the shift was imperiously tugged on, and she was quick to demand that Xena lose hers as soon as possible. That proved to be the more problematic of the two, and in the final frantic stages of disrobing the Warrior Princess, they overbalanced and ended up in a happy tangle on the bed.

Part Three

Day after Sweetest.

Xena's eyes narrowed as she stopped in the middle of the village. She put her hands on her hips, her bare, naked arms akimbo, and scanned one last time. No sign of Damia. She was fast losing patience with trying to find the blacksmith.
Earlier, she had been woken from a rather erotic dream by the door of their hut opening and closing. In the lingering clutches of Morpheus, she thought she must have been still dreaming. The reality that her senses filtered into her conscious mind was far more enjoyable than bothering to find out who might have come in.
Her left leg had gone asleep, it was dangling off the side of the bed. Her right arm was similary afflicted, for Gabrielle's head was pillowed on that shoulder. She knew, rather than felt that her fingers were entwined in the red-gold silk of the bard's hair, the scent of which filled her nostrils. Her right leg was immobilised by one of Gabrielle's, and her right side was tantalisingly in contact with the full length of her muscular little torso. Best of all, those inky little fingers were sleepily stroking a warrior breast.
A huge smile spread over Xena's face. She couldn't remember the last time she had felt like this about anyone - man or woman. To tell the truth she never had felt like this, because as she had confessed to Gabrielle last night, she had at last found the missing part of her soul.
"Gabrielle..."
However much she was enjoying herself lying here like this with Gabrielle - her dream come true - nature finally drove Xena to extricate herself. She had been sure that her lover was playing possum, but the younger woman never once stirred, but merely whimpered in protest at the removal of the soft, warm pillow she had been snuggled up to.
When Xena finished dressing, she still felt naked, and spotting Argo's saddle in the corner, she realised why. She hadn't a single item of armour to put on. Even her bracers and gauntlets would be a help. That old fusspot Damia can't keep all of it for ever, she grumbled to herself, and stumped off to the forge to reclaim her gauntlets - minimum.
A very flustered Syra had told her her the smith had just left with all the armour when she called into the forge on her first stop. Still no Damia. Still no armour. She wanted to get back to Gabrielle.
"By Hephaestus, Syra where is your mind!!! Xena chopped a small coppice to matchwood last night and you let the Gods-damned fire go out!!"
The stream of invective that followed was pitched at a lower level, so Xena had difficulty making out just what the smith thought of her apprentice's antecedents. At least she now knew where she was. Odd that, how did I miss her? she frowned.
"'Scuse me...ladies?" she ventured, as she put her head round the door of the smithy.
Syra beamed at Xena, who normally terrified her, for she would have been grateful for an interrruption from Hades himself, now that Hippodmia's temper had caught light. "Morning Xena!" she shrilled, her voice almost an octave higher than usual with anxiety.
"Er, hi again Syra. Uh...hi Damia." With the smith in such a paddy, even Xena felt nervous. She might have been shorter than Gabrielle, but she was as wide across the shoulders as Xena and had spent all her adult life hammering iron and bronze and shoeing horses. Xena had seen her squeeze the life out of the Amazons' enemies with protracted bear hugs.
"Yes, I know! Your armour. I've got it here!" snapped the smith. She picked up the pile of leather and bronze off the work table and thrust it at Xena.
"You'd have had it earlier if you'd been awake!" she winked leerily at the taller woman, and a huge grin lit her face as she watched Xena's face turn cherry-red.
"Syra, get out of my sight, and don't come back 'til your mother has taught you to light and tend a bloody fire!" she turned and bawled at her apprentice. The mousy girl bolted as fast as she could.
"She makes Joxer look like a master craftsman!"
Damia craned her neck round the door to make sure the girl was well clear before addressing the flushed warrior.
"Well, you were going to tell us you two were an item sometime soon, I hope," she smirked. "If you'd only said sooner, I'd have known to leave you two love birds to get on with it."
"Wasn't anything going on before...."
Nice one Xena, blurt it out, why don't you give her a blow by blow account of last night while you're at it.
"Gods, woman, I know she was an innocent abroad when she came here first, but she's our Queen now. She can't have missed the couples here in the village....could she?"
Xena shrugged. "She did at first, but even after she spotted them, it took her a while to figure out that she felt that way about me."
"Whereas she's had you wrapped round her little finger for more than a year now."
"Oh Hades! Was I that obvious?" asked Xena, the armour slipping in her arms at the thought of her crush on the bard being the talk of the village.
Damia winced. "Well I was pretty sure, I mean I remember how I was when I was smitten, and you remind me of myself in that way. It was usually some tall, leggy archer with great breasts. They were more difficult to fit right. I got to make all their breast shields you know. What a job... money for old rope."
Xena's eyebrow rose at the sight of the grouchy smith softening at as she recalled her lovelife.
"Ha, don't mock! My hair used to be black once you know! And I'm not immune to the charms of a tall leggy warrior even now," she smiled lecherously at Xena, sweeping an appreciative glance over her from head to toe. "I bet you're still at the 'can't keep my hands off her stage'...." she paused as Xena shook her head.
"Nope, it's she can't keep her hands off me. Mind you, all she has to do is lay a finger on me..." Xena's voice trailed off contentedly at that thought. The smith chuckled.
"Okay, who else knows?!" snapped Xena.
"Well, Solari's got a bet on with a few people," she admitted. "I'm not sure who though."
"Zeus! It's really new for the both of us, and I think we'd...that is, I'd like to keep it quiet for now. Honestly, I'm afraid I'll wake up tomorrow and find I was just dreaming and she's impervious to my physical charms again."
Damia nodded sympathetically, she was touched by the uncertainty in Xena's face and demeanour. "I expect you'd like a bit of peace and quiet then?"
"Yeah, but we're not ready to leave here yet, I mean it's not just Gabrielle, I could do with a little more time out here myself. It's going to be really hard not to let the cat out of the bag.""I think I have an idea that might help....." grinned Damia.

It had been just the spot indeed, thought Xena as she quietly steered Argo back through the woods towards the village. After such a wonderful day to themselves by the beautiful pool that Damia had told her about, if it was possible to feel any more relaxed and contented, she would simply slide bonelessly off Argo's back.
The sounds of the darkening forest would not allow her to relax completely. She was alert to every small sound, dismissing it only when she had identified it. She had to be, for she was - to her own mind and practical purposes - naked. No armour, no sword, no whip. Just the breast dagger and her chakram, even her gauntlets had been left behind.
There had been an argument about it.
Xena had lost that one.
Then there had been an argument about bringing food.
Gabrielle lost that one.
She relented when Xena pleaded for Argo to have a holiday too. Then Xena recovered some ground, the chakram was insurance against the fish not biting and in any case her breast dagger wasn't open for discussion, as it was already in place in its discreet sheath.
She was glad of them now to protect the precious sleeping bundle in front of her. They were riding bareback, and Xena was using a soft rope halter to guide Argo. She grinned broadly to herself and planted a kiss on the red-gold head lolling against her shoulder. She was enjoying the feel of the warm relaxed weight of the bard in her arms.
The sturdy thighs were pressed against her own, and with each stride the golden mare made, the inkstained bardic hand brushed rhythmically off Xena's thigh. She had one arm wrapped around the young woman's bare waist to keep her on horseback. In the other hand she held her steed's rope reins loosely. Gabrielle had rested her left hand on that forearm just before she dropped off to sleep and Xena was almost using telepathy to steer Argo to avoid having it slip off.
Gabrielle had objected strenuously to riding the palomino bareback before they left the village, but she quickly found that she was able to snuggle so much closer to her love, and had the plausible excuse of fear to explain the death grip she had on the warrior's waist. She hadn't been slow finding more to the plus side of bareback riding as soon as they were out of sight. Xena had had a Tartarus of a time getting them to the pool in one piece. Those wandering bardic hands nearly made Xena lose her seat several times on the way.
She heaved a huge contented sigh and began to hum an old love song softly to herself. She was humming it through a bemused grin. Singing again! Twice - in as many days. Gabrielle had asked her to as they prepared, reluctantly, to go back before the evening air got too cool, to their Amazon friends and restraint after their uninhibited day alone together.
Xena had insisted that Gabrielle ride in front for the trip and had won that argument, though truth to tell the bard was too tired to fight her corner on that one.
"I've only ever heard you sing that funeral song Xena. It's very beautiful, but do you know any other kind?" she asked, as Xena urged Argo into a stately walk.
"Yup."
"Like what? Would today count as an occasion that would move you to sing?"
Gabrielle felt the laugh start in Xena's belly before she heard it erupt from her mouth.
"Oh yeah, you bet! Moves me to do other things besides singing," she said, dropping her voice a half-octave and breathing the words seductively into the bard's ear.
Gabrielle giggled and squirmed. She could hardly believe it was less than a day since they had crossed the line between being best friends and lovers - no, more than that - soul-mates. They had spent the day -
Making love.
Swimming.
Making love.
Fishing.
Making love.
Eating.
Making love.
Hunting.
Making love.
And not always sticking as exclusively to each activity as that list might suggest. She had even found time to write some poems while Xena slept - she had never thought she would find Xena's snores inspirational, but that was only one of many wonders she had discovered today.
She twisted round in her love's arms and looked into her sparkling sapphire eyes.
"Well, prove it! Sing something then!" she commanded.
"Hmmm." Xena's eyebrow rose. "I think I need a little encouragement."
Gabrielle frowned and opened her mouth to ask what kind of encouragement, and her question was answered by a deep, greedy kiss from the warrior.
"Oh," she said faintly, as first, Xena's teeth let go of and then Xena's lips slowly unstuck themselves from hers. "I see. That kind," she murmured, "of encouragement." She provided the encouragement requested as long as her breath lasted.
"I think I'd better start singing. Can't have you encouraging me like that in front of an audience just yet!"
It was a sweet gentle lullaby, and at first Gabrielle leaned back against Xena's arm, watching her sing. Then she felt her eyelids begin to droop and her head begin to nod, so she settled herself back against the warm leather of the warrior's tunic and rested her head against her shoulder. Although she was enjoying the feel of the regular rise and fall of Xena's chest as he sang, she now realised why Xena had been so adamant she ride in front for the trip back. Xena had wrapped an arm round her to steady her and give her confidence, and she liked that - a lot. However, there was hardly any silky warrior skin to run her hands over, she thought disappointedly, except.... She began to stroke the muscular forearm that Xena was holding so carefully away from them so she could steer Argo, and she put her other hand on the hand that rested on her waist. She smiled drowsily to herself at the gooseflesh she could feel under her fingers.
"You cold?" she asked ingenuously.
"Nope," answered Xena tightly now that she had finished her song. The little minx could gauge the effect she had on her to perfection after less than a day of love-making. Future's looking good, she thought cheerily.
"Who taught you that Xena? Cyrene?"
"Yeah. Used to sing it for Lyceus when he was little and she was busy with the tavern. He used to be scared of the dark."
Hearing the catch in Xena's voice, Gabrielle patted her arm sympathetically.
"Thanks, that was beautiful," she whispered sleepily.
"You're welcome. Wanna hear another? There's more where that came from." "Mmmmmsuuure."
Xena grinned lopsidedly at the very slurred sound that had issued from the bard. With luck, she'd sleep all the way to the village and they'd make it back before dark after all.

In the dark, Xena almost tripped over the belt as she came into the hut. She cursed softly to herself and bent to pick it up, hoping she hadn't woken the bard. Just then the moon came out from behind a cloud, and she spotted the skirt and the green top scattered on the floor in a direct line with the chair she was heading for - at some stage while she was gone, Gabrielle had got up and got undressed. She sat down heavily, with the rescued clothes in her lap, to collect her thoughts before getting ready for bed.
Hippodamia had been watching for their return and had met them at the edge of the village. A messenger had ridden in from Thessaly some hours ago, and was waiting to talk to the Warrior Princess. She had deposited the fully dressed, sleeping bard in their bed and raced off to find out what the problem was. There was no use speculating until she got to Thessaly and saw some of the evidence with her own two eyes, but she was sure this could only mean trouble of the highest order.
If what the scout said was true, the Persians were on their way to invade Greece, and he had described tactics that Xena knew to be pure Persian. If the Fates meant to end her life in a fight to the death with the Persians, so be it. She just wished fervently that she could have more time to show Gabrielle by her actions how much she truly loved her, for she knew she was disastrous with words.
Her eyes greedily devoured the sight of her young lover lying facing the wall on the bed before her. She had clearly been tossing and turning, for the sheet was hanging off the bed, halfway to the floor, revealing her naked form. With a huge sigh, the young woman rolled over and turned her face towards the brooding warrior.
Xena carefully committed every feature of that beloved face, even sweeter and more innocent in sleep than when she was awake, to memory. Then she let her gaze travel hungrily down over the milky breasts with their rosy nipples, over the taut belly to the golden fuzz just revealed by the sheet.
"I love you Gabrielle," she whispered to herself. "I swear, if I have to die in the attempt that I will let no harm come to you in this fight. I swear on Lyceus' grave." She buried her face in the soft cloth of the green top and breathing in the scent of her lover, she felt the knot of fear inside her begin to dissolve. She undressed quickly and reached for her shift, then changed her mind. The bard was exhausted - not just from their intense day together, but as much from the events of the past few weeks catching up on her at last - still, it never hurt to be dressed for action just in case, she thought, as she slid in beside Gabrielle.
Hours later, she was still awake, eyes wide open, her mind whirling, hands cradling her head. She was as near the edge of the bed as she could be without falling off so as not to disturb Gabrielle. The bard's soft snores were beginning to grate on her nerves. She would never get to sleep at his rate, and it seemed she wasn't going to get what she really wanted either. She swiped a long leg to one side and pushed.
"Gabrielle...turn on your side," she ordered.
"Hnnngh!"
It worked - after a fashion. The bard rolled over and came to rest with her face mashed up against Xena's side, and a hand thrown on her belly. Sweat began to bead Xena's brow. Her mind was churning with the tension of the anticipated battle with the Persians. This kind of tension always had an effect on her body. It was wound as tightly as a war catapult, and she had no way of releasing the tension. In the past she had often ridden off and dealt with it by herself. She had nowhere to go now, and no erotic fantasy to use, for that particular dream had been realised and lay sleeping peacefully, trustingly beside her.
Xena felt unbearably aroused, lying there breathing in the scent of Gabrielle's body, her hair, hearing the small sounds she made in her sleep, feeling her warm weight pressed against her own body. So great was her need, she was terrified to move in case, in her desperate fear of losing her newly found love she swept the girl into her arms and took her violently and hurt her.
"mmmXeeeena...back...."
Gabrielle woke, lifted her head, brushing her lips past a warm heavy breast as she did.,br> "Hey, you're awake. Thought I'd worn you out!" said Xena lightly, staying completely still only by a supreme effort of will. Her heart hammered painfully as she watched the bard's face colour.
"I woke up a while back, and missed you. Where'd you get to?"
"Talking to Ephiny," she answered shortly.
Gabrielle was only begining to focus, but the tone of Xena's voice, the curtness of the sentence and the guarded expression on her face rang so many alarm bells in her mind that she came wide awake right away. She shifted to prop herself on an elbow and make herself more comfortable for a serious conversation, rather than another amorous session.
"What's wrong?" she asked anxiously, as she heard Xena's sharp intake of breath.
"It can wait 'til later," she rasped, as a small hand slid down her belly and into the tangle of dark curls between her legs.
"You sure? You seem preoccupied, I know it's important."
Swallowing hard, Xena unlocked her hands and reached out with one to stroke the bard's face.
"Oh yeah, it can wait," she replied, some of the tension draining away at the sight of the concern in Gabrielle's eyes and the mere fact that she had known to ask the question. "I need you to do something for me Gabrielle."
"Sure, anything, you know you only have to ask," she smiled.
"Make love to me, please."
Gabrielle laughed - it was a short, embarassed sound. While she had initiated most of their lovemaking bouts that day, Xena had very quickly taken charge of them. After all she was the older, more experienced partner. The bard wasn't planning to have it happen that way all the time, but she felt that she needed a little more experience of Xena's passion before begining to take the lead.
"Me?! You want me to...well....start? I can do that, yeah, I guess I can. But...uuuh...really, I...you....should I mean, I hardly..."
Xena's tension drained completely away at the sight of the flustered face inches from her own, and she beamed at her.
"Sure, why not?" she drawled as her eyes flicked lazily down the length of her body to where Gabrielle had nervously begun to stroke Xena's mound. "You should never start something if you don't mean to finish it, ya know!"
"Oh Hades!" she groaned, and put her head down on Xena's chest.
"Wrong God, Gabrielle! Besides," she purred, as she slid a hand into the bard's hair to lift her head up, "I've decided tonight that I'll be like putty in your hands." As green eyes gazed into hers she took charge of Gabrielle's hand with her other one. "Well, maybe not exactly like putty," she mumbled against the girl's mouth as she guided her hand between her legs.
"Oooooh no, not like putty at all!" exclaimed Gabrielle.

Day of Departure

Gabrielle munched her way pensively through breakfast with Ephiny and Xenan. She had woken just before dawn - for once before Xena. She had lain there, in dreamy contentment, propped on an elbow on her side, admiring the beautiful, powerful, scarred body sprawled beside her. She marvelled at how much softer and younger Xena's face seemed in repose, then became impatient for her to wake so she could gaze into the blue jewels of her eyes. Her wish was soon granted, and they lay quietly talking over whether or not they would say anything about the change in their relationship to Ephiny.
She felt guilty about their decision to say nothing as yet, and hoped the regent would construe her silence as concern for the journey ahead. That was genuine, anyway. Xena was tight-lipped about her thoughts on the matter - which was more than enough to have Gabrielle worried in itself. Ephiny was absorbed in feeding Xenan breakfast.
Solari drifted in and out to report on progress at the forge.
"She doesn't look as if she's going to do backflips over the roof of the smithy any more. She's just pacing up and down and swearing under her breath, now."
"Will you take this and ask her to eat something, please Solari?" asked Gabrielle, handing the dark-haired Amazon a plate and a cup.
"Okay, I just hope she doesn't bite my head off!"
"Gabrielle, what's a backflip?"
"Not now Xenan, Gabrielle has to be ready to go as soon as Argo gets her new shoe," said Ephiny gently to her son.
"Can Argo do backflips like Xena?"
"Look, Xenan, let me show what a backflip is..." Gathering some toothpicks, Gabrielle started to distract the little boy. As she spotted scraps of cloth and fur, she thought she might as well make it as interesting as she could for herself too.
Meanwhile Xena had a trench worn outside the forge.
"You old fusspot, there was at least a week left in that shoe!" she muttered under her breath.
Damia stopped hammering the shoe into shape.
"Huh! The way you ride this beast? I'd give it three days - tops!"
"All right, all right! So in three days time you think I won't be able to find a smithy?"
Damia gave the shoe an extra hard wallop. "In three days time you may be trying to haul that obstinate butt of yours away from the Persians at high speed. Want to do that with three shoes on your horse? And Gabrielle running ahead of you?" she hissed. The blacksmith had been around long enough to have a fair idea who Xena thought was responsible for the attacks in Thessaly. She had also seen enough action in her lifetime to know that if she was right about their identity, the warrior's agitated state was more than justified.
Xena stopped dead in her tracks. "No, of course not," she ground out through her teeth. "But the sooner I get started..."
"Yes, yes I know. Dragging the poor child from her warm bed at the crack of dawn, expecting her to travel on an empty stomach. Very smart. If I didn't kow you better I'd say you were panicking." Damia punctuated her words with hammer blows, and as she finished her last sentence and the shaping of the shoe, she looked up to see Xena scowling darkly at her. "Foot!" she ordered.
The warrior obliged and picked up Argo's near fore.
"That'll do," Damia said in a satisfied tone, then went to cool the shoe before attaching it.
"Xena?"
"What??!"
"Gabrielle sent some breakfast," said Solari as fast as she could.
"Oh, right. Thanks," she had managed to soften her tone somewhat."Go on, eat. You can't do anything more here, and it'll make life easier for Gabrielle if she doesn't have to listen to your rumbling belly in an hour's time or put up with your bad temper for the rest of the day!" groused the smith as she bent to pick up the palomino's hoof.
Solari thought Xena was going to explode, and waited only long enough to see her rip a huge piece from a bread roll as if she wished it were the smith's head she was biting off. She scurried back to where a small group had gathered around the pile of bags that contained the travellers' belongings. Gabrielle was ignoring the performance at the forge and was amusing Xenan with a small figure she had made, explaining to him how Xena worked up momentum before taking off into a flip.
Laïs was watching, fascinated, leaning on her bow. She was hopeless with small children, but was always interested to see how those who were good with them coped with them. A few bits of stick and cloth - reminds me of Xena she thought idly.
"How are they getting on?" asked Ephiny.
"Nearly done," answered Solari, out of puff from her brisk sprint away from Xena's grinding teeth. The three Amazons stood around for a while, watching Gabrielle entertain Xenan, though Solari spent more time watching Laïs than anyone else. At last the tap of hammer on hoof stopped, and the expected call came.
"Gabrielle! Get ready!" Xena yelled, as she spurred Argo into a trot away from the forge.
"Oh, Zeus, my scrolls!" The bard ducked back into the hut.
Xena reined Argo in and jumped down. With an economy of movement and words she had loaded the bags on the mare, and shaken hands all round, even with her tiny half-Centaur namesake, all in the time it took the bard to get her scrolls. As she came rushing out of the hut, her bag already on her shoulder, Laïs spotted her tucking the little stick figure into her cleavage.
"Ready?" Xena asked her lover, trying to put into her eyes what she couldn't say in words, at least not openly right now, conscious of the fact that neither of them might not survive to see this village and these friends again. They had discussed whether or not they would tell the Amazons that their Queen in waiting had a consort, and had decided against it.
Gabrielle's gaze was just as loaded. Neither look was lost on Laïs.
"Yeah, I'm ready as I'll ever be."
Xena nodded curtly and turned to mount Argo. Gabrielle made a last quick round of hugs, and then, waving, went to walk off.
"Hey!"
She turned to see Xena's hand stretched out to offer her a boost. Argo was shifing her hooves restlessly, and snorts rippled from her nostrils. She was picking up on Xena's mood.
"Uh, Xena she doesn't seem to be in the best of form, maybe she needs a break from carrying the both of us."
Xena took a foot out of the stirrup. She meant business. "She's fine, just impatient to get going. Like me. Up. Now."
"Okay."
The bard complied and was barely seated when Xena urged Argo into a brisk trot. Gabrielle had to make a grab for the warrior's waist to keep her seat and ended up waving her farewells with her staff.
Xenan lost patience fast now that his playmate Gabrielle was gone, and dragged his mother away. Laïs and Solari stayed to watch them to the last. The tall rangy archer sighed noisily, and turned to Solari.
"How in Tartarus does she put up with those moods of Xena's?"
"Oh, I'm sure there are....compensations," smiled Solari, arching an eyebrow for further emphasis. Here goes nothing she thought, she grew up in an Amazon village, if she doesn't get it now, there's no hope.
Laïs frowned and leaned her chin on her bow for a few moments, staring into the distance at the diminishing forms of the horse and riders . "You...you don't mean they...they're..." she jerked her head up and looked at the second-in-command, her eyes wide open.
"I don't mean they're what? Lovers?"
Laïs' face flushed.
"Don't tell me you haven't wondered about them? Nearly everyone has. Just wish we knew for sure," sighed Solari.
"I think I might be able to find out," offered Laïs hesitantly.
"How?"
"Damia, of course."
Solari laughed. "Wild horses won't drag it out of her, even if she knows!"
"I think I could get her to tell me, just the same," she paused and swallowed hard. "I need a new breast shield."
Solari's eyes lit up. Damia's penchant for tall archers was the legendary butt of jokes among young Amazons.
"Care to meet me by the river this evening to tell me about it?"
"What if she knows nothing or won't tell me anything?"
"Oh, there's plenty you can learn from what people don't tell you. I can teach you something about that. Besides, I'm sure we can find other things to....talk about too," said Solari, her heart starting to pound. "What do you say. We got a date?"
Laïs nodded, and smiled shyly.
"See you later then!" Solari was sure she was six feet off the ground as she headed back to Ephiny's hut.

Pride Goeth Before A Fall

It was nothing like yesterday. The saddle kept her at a distance, not to mention the armour and the sword, all securely strapped to Xena's tense body. Gabrielle had managed to put an arm around her waist, but this was more from necessity than a pleasure, for it was like hugging a brick wall. Xena was worried and she wasn't going to talk about it, so the bard stayed silent and let her mind run on how to be of more help to the woman she loved.
As Argo's gait slowed to a walk she felt the little stick figure pinch her breasts and her conversation with little Xenan came back to her. In the two and a bit years she had been travelling with Xena her strength and fighting skills had developed and matured. Now if only she could make herself more agile and acrobatic, she too, could add an extra element of surprise to their fights.
It might mean the difference between life and death for them both. Life without Xena had been unthinkable up to a month ago. Briefly, life with her had been unbearable. Now that they were lovers, life without her would be unlivable.

Backflips, backflips, how does she do them. She closed her eyes and started to picture her doing one. It was pleasant - more than pleasant! She forced herself to think anaytically about it. Over and over she replayed the image in her mind until at last she had it - or so she thought. Now, if she was going to learn it she would need a little help. A staff at first to define an axis for turning until she got a feel for judging the height at which to launch....
Argo came to a halt.
"What's up?" she asked anxiously, jolted from her calculations.
"Argo okay, it's not another shoe?"
"Nope, she's fine. I need to hit the bushes. Get down and stretch your legs."
Gabrielle complied, and as Xena loped off, she spotted the perfect pair of trees. With a grin she grabbed her staff and a couple of pieces of rope. By the time Xena came back she was psyching up for her first try.
"What are you doing?" the warrior frowned, her arms akimbo as she stopped in the middle of the road.
"Just watch. I figured something out."
Xena watched with what little patience she could muster - hardly any at all. She grimaced and twitched as Gabrielle revved up and ran at the staff. She flipped a full three hundred and sixty degress and landed safe and sound on both feet.
"Terrific. Now can we head for Thessaly before you hurt yourself?"