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or 2005!
Return to the Dog House!
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Check out the blogs from...
Return to the Dog House! |
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Sunday, May 7, 2006
With exams in 11 hours, I am beginning to get to the end of my rope. I swear that I've found myself every so often pulling out hairs from my head...literally. I used to have a bad habit of rubbing my neck or my forehead really hard when I'm stressed, which turned into running my fingers through my hair, and now, that occasionally leads to a few hairs pulled out. (And interestingly enough, yesterday morning, I found that one of the hairs I pulled out was a bright brownish-orangey colour=S) At this rate...if I haven't pulled out all of my hair by Wednesday, I'll probably have strands of white (or oddly coloured) hair.
But yes...please pray for my sanity these next few days. I've come to realize that even if I manage to mentally, emotionally and psychologically handle 5 exams in 3 days, my hand may not be able to physically handle the excess amount of writing it'll have to do=S AHHHHHHHHHH!!! Need to scream!!!
I was just going through film study tonite...and I realized that there are TWENTY-EIGHT films I need to get straight in my head!!! That's how many films we've watched since our mid-term!!! That exam's on Wednesday (my last one). Unfortunately, I still haven't started to look at architecture (Wednesday morning)...
Okay, okay...no more blogging...must return to studying.
Dying...
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Friday, May 6, 2006
*sigh*...first blog as 19 years of age=P And what do I begin with!?! The song from the Elephant Show of my childhood=D hehe...although I must admit, I don't remember much except for the theme song=P Anyhooey, if you don't know the song, feel free to go here to have a listen. It'll be worth your while=) (note: you'll have to wait a bit, as the song is sung at the last part of the clip...and you'll have to excuse the fact that parts of the song are cut out...hehe...hope you enjoy it though=D)
Anyhooey, I woke up early today, since I had my film study exam review from 10am to 1pm...I know, what a great day AND time to have it...but it was kinda useful, so I won't complain too much=P And now, after having had some lunch, I shall study a bit more before enjoying a more restful evening than my past few.
With exams in 2 days...I'm starting to get that queasy feeling in the stomach whenever I think about them too much...and it still feels like I'm not retaining as much information as I should. Guess I can't do too much about that as I'm studying for 5 courses in 3 days=S *sigh*...just do my best and leave the rest to God, right?
Well, better go and work...
Older and wiser?...
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Thursday, May 4, 2006
Sooo...after two (and a bit) days of pure Fine Art History cramming...I think my brain is fried. And after all this studying...I still don't think I know all that I need to know for the Tuesday exam, nor know why I took this course in the first place. Hmm...if I remember correctly, I think it was cuz I thought I might need to know my art periods and such in relation to architecture...well, THAT didn't work out so well!
Anyhooey...I think the most interesting things I've come across in this course are all the French sayings/phrases that were mentioned. The first one is the phrase found on Marcel Duchamp's tombstone (as quoted above), translating into something like, "Besides, it is always the others that die." An interesting last remark for those who are "left behind"...and reminds me of another quote, said by a man whose name is James S. Stewart, "Let us live as people who are prepared to die, and die as people who are prepared to live." Just something to think about, I guess...and hopefully live out.
The second phrase was also from Duchamp...a painting he did of Mona Lisa with the addition of a moustache and beard, and the letters, L. H. O. O. Q., which (when read quickly in French) sounds like, "She has a hot behind." Yes...hehe...I tried figuring out the actual French phrase, but I believe the specific word here for "behind" is probably one that isn't found in your average French-English dictionary=P
The third one is from The Treachery of Images by René Magritte. It features an oil painting of a pipe on canvas, followed by a caption beneath it, saying, "Ceci n'est pas une pipe." Or simply, "This is not a pipe." And if you think about it, it's true=P hehe...I know...these may not be so funny or entertaining to you as they are for me...but you must realize I just spent the majority of the last 48 hours going through a whole year's worth of Fine Art History...and let me tell you, it doesn't get very intriguing...=S
Unfortunately, seeing that I've only reviewed the year's worth of information, I'll have to sift through images (and memorize names, titles, and dates) tomorrow...since I've gotta write a good essay on some unknown topic with examples and everything on Tuesday=S *gasp*...my head hurts just thinking about it!
Anyhooey, onto more happy matters...I actually got to go out today!!! hehe...I know, it's sad isn't it? But well, I got to endure an hour of rush hour traffic (but there were birthday presents - more to follow), go to Pacific Mall and Market Village (got to satisfy the craving for green tea bubble tea and curry fish balls), and have Korean barbecue to finish off the nite!!! I was soooo full by the end of the meal, it was not funny! But it was sooooo good=D hehe...I guess it's like they say, "No pain, no gain!"
Anyhooey, presents!!! The first ones I've received, and they're great presents, I must say=D From Gung Gung, I received the usual English birthday card with a few short handwritten (easily comprehensible) Chinese birthday wishes in a white envelope with "To: Angela" written in big caps, "Louis" (my grandpa's English name) stamped in the corner, as well as various rainbow-coloured rubber-stamped images, saying, "Happy Birthday!" Inside was a Chinese red envelope, with money that will (of course) be put into paying off my loans=P
The second and third gifts were kind of a "combo" package=P Both were wrapped in the same type of wrapping paper...oddly shaped, and of course, being me, I attempted my best to guess what they were before opening them=P My closest deduction was: "electronics". My parents' present was a Mini iPod kit, with car adaptor, RCA adaptor (for connecting to stereos), firewire (supposed to update your music faster), headphone splitter (so 2 headphones can be plugged in at the same time), and a clear protective plastic case. Cecilia's present was a new pair of headphones=) hehe...seeing that we're going on a road trip from Vancouver to Calgary (and back) during our upcoming B.C. trip, the presents should come in handy=) I just hope I make good use of them! But there's nothing better than the gift of music, right? hehe...
*sigh*...it's past midnite already...oh, me so tired...keep thinking it's Saturday tomorrow...but I guess it'll come soon enough=S Too bad I won't be home for my birthday...Oh well, at least I got to celebrate today=) Okee...time for sleep...
ZZZzzzzz...
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Monday, May 1, 2006
So, realizing that it is past midnite, it's officially May, which means my rare month of more frequent blogging is over. Can you believe it!?! It's already May!!!
Anyhooey, I was skimming my collection of saved lyrics on my computer, when I came across the song (of which the chorus is quoted above) that is sung by Leigh Nash (lead vocalist of Sixpence None the Richer) and Dan Haseltine. The City On a Hill album is great, but this one song stood out for me...a very soothing, awe-inspiring song.
In my opinion, it is one of the rare songs of which I've come across that can be sung truthfully with a heart of worship whether I am happy or sad, or going through an "up" phase or a "down" phase in life. Its mellow sound and gradual build helps the joyful soul to rejoice and remember that all blessings are from God, and for the troubled soul, it helps calm the heart and mind, alleviate the stress, and remind that God is forever loving and faithful.
It is one of those songs that are able to place you in a clearer perspective...reflecting on all the joys and the trials of life: "For all your times of laughter, in every hopeful prayer, when the world weighs on your shoulders, through the sorrow and your despair, with everything, with every breath, praise the Lord..."
How hard it is to remember to do that. One of the lessons that I find hardest to learn, and yet the one that God always consistently and patiently brings me back to time and time again.
My dad asked me last nite what my wish was for my birthday, and I jokingly replied, "To survive exams, and pass first year," but to think about it seriously...I'd have to say, "To learn how to worship God in any and every circumstance in which I find myself. To learn how to love and care for the people He brings into my life each and every day. And to learn how to trust and be vulnerable again."
I've never been one to really put much thought into birthday wishes, and the whole thing about how you're not supposed to tell anyone or it won't come true=P But I guess this one's not so much a wish as a goal of sorts.
*sigh*...and today (or well, "yesterday") was another Sunday morning at MCBC when someone came up to me saying they missed "hearing me sing" on one of the worship teams. I know, you're probably saying, "Isn't that a compliment?" And yeah, I guess, in a way, it is...and most of them mean it as a compliment, but sometimes the way in which they say it, seems like they're subliminally saying either one of the following:
a) "We're short on worship leaders/teams. Come back, join a team, and help serve."
b) "We like your voice, it's pretty...makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside."
I'm not saying that all people who say such things (whether directly or sumbliminally) have hidden intentions...it's just it always causes me to think twice about what is seemingly being communicated.
But the truth is, I miss worshipping in a community, and I miss singing my li'l heart out, while knowing that people all around me are doing likewise to praise God. And I find, more often now than ever, that I am most at peace and real with God when I'm alone singing by myself where and when no one can hear me (except maybe my suitemates next door=S).
I find that whenever I am worshipping as a part of a congregation, I find it awkward and struggle a lot more with finding relevance to the song's content...which I guess is my problem more than the congregation's...but it makes me wonder how many other people feel disconnected when they're standing or sitting, singing or listening, in a congregation before which a worship team leads? I mean the question has crossed my mind before when I was part of a worship team...Is the congregation responding to the songs that are chosen? Are people engaging with the songs (i.e. comtemplating the lyrics while reading, mouthing, singing, or listening to the words)?
But I wonder how much this is determined/influenced by the individual, the worship team, or the community of faith...and each of these categories and their relationship with God. I mean, an individual could feel disconnected in a congregation, because their relationship with God isn't very strong, they're just having a bad day, the worship team is (musically) "bad", or the community of faith is foreign or new to them or is one in which they do not exactly fit. Or well, it could as easily be all of the above, right? So...I guess the question is, "Which of these potential reasons apply to me?" An interesting question to ponder about the next time you find yourself out of place in the crowd.
Busy pondering...
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Check out the blogs from...
2007,
December, November, October, September, August, July, June, May, April, March, February, January,
or 2005!
Return to the Dog House!