Beans

"Beware the Beans in March"
(CyberCaesar, Act III Scene IV, by William Quakespere).

Hi Mom! Heya Sparks! [Dad's an electrician].
Ummm, sorry this is late for your birthday Mum, but I've been a little distracted. Dad, remember how Mom freaked when I pranged the car and got all those stiches down my forehead? Well, you better sit her down and keep reminding her that I still have all my fingers - OK?

You know that new puter and the net access I told you about? Well there's this other thing called IRC, where you use the 'puter to chat with people all over the world. I've been talking with this woman in California, but their time's 17 hours behind us and we can't seem to coordinate 4 chat.

Night B4 last, I'd beenworking all day n didnt feel like cooking -so I just put a csn of beans to heat ina pot of water on the stove - but i was there on chat looking 4 her 'till the wee hours an when I couldn't find her,

... U guessed it - I went to bed an I slept right thru the explosion - it wasnt til yesterday morning I saw the carnage -

its like someone spraypainted the whoile kitchen - in bean! Its gone right thru one side into the breakfast room an out into the lounge - and the laundry's on the utha side - it shotgunned the drying wrack- there's beans all thru my underbunders!

Jus looking at it, u'd never believe such a tiny can could go so far - Ive been scrubbing all day an i still haven't got it off the roof - (I'll NEVER get it out of the exhaust fan) I had the floor an half the walls done b4 I realised I should've started with the ceiling - now, its all gonna flake all over the floorsan I'll have to do them again (sn half it wont come off the WALLS - howl I get it off the ROOF?) the guy I share the house with owns the place - he's visiting rels in queensland so I got til the 31st til he gets back, but I still dunno hw imgunna do it ...

an the pot! Ah MUM~! I cant get the black char off it an now I gotta buy him a new one - I thought I might sneak a nutha one in that looks the same, n not tell him, but he's gotta notice - the whole kitchens a lot darker, n it wont come off! If he tries 2 use the exhaust fan, im ded!

jeez -whatm I gonna dooo !

dont eva mention beans to me again

(its kinda ironic cos the guy Ishare with is a real slob n im always om his case about the mess in the kitchen)

Anyhow, if you're still talking 2 me, i have ben thinking of you, it's just I've been a bit too preoccupied to write. Thanks heaps for listening itsa real help to talk. (and confession does wonders - i think I'll go blow something else up now)

Better go now,
all my love
Oh, and happy birthday,
from "Tommy junya"
X O X O X O X O
P.S. an if you comeupwith anythng better than bleach, mail me will you?

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