Thursday, June 17, 2004

Before I say anything else, yes, I still have the kidney stones. No, I don't know how much longer they're going to be in me. Right now, it doesn't matter to me.

As uncomfortable as they may make me, it's all forgotten when I'm with Molly.

She truly is an amazing girl, beyond anything I've ever dealt with before. So much so, in fact, that I have been constantly caught off guard by the things she's done for me. This is no knock on the other two girls I've dated in my time, but she's already treated me better than I've ever been treated before in my life.

The funny thing? We're not even officially dating. Yet she still is treating me so good that I am at a loss. For the first time I'm going to have to see if I can get some opinions on what I should do in return for the things she's done.

Get this, I got her two roses last week in return for all the text roses she'd been sending me. I came out of work Thursday to find beautiful flowers sitting on my car and her watching me from afar. That went down as the best surprise I had ever had in my life. I had never been given flowers before until she did it.

Tonight, we decided to hang out together even though I'm still feeling the affects of the stones. Before that even went down, she had done nothing but check up on me to make sure I was doing okay. The girl cares. I've never had that happen where I hadn't been doing too well and a girl that I'm not even dating is checking up on me, making sure I'm all right. Granted, Megan's been doing it lately too, but she never did this while we were dating. Molly's doing it within two weeks of knowing me.

All day she kept making sure I was up to seeing her (which I was going to be even if I was dying), giving me the impression that she really wanted to see me. It's amazing to feel wanted by someone again, no matter how you want to look at it.

While we were on the phone at one point, she was asking me all these questions about things. Me, not even realizing that I'm being asked for a reason, didn't give the greatest answers, but I'm not used to a girl doing things for me, such as buying little things that she thinks I'll like. I didn't know she was asking me about my favorite fruit and/or scents because she was buying me a candle. I had no idea.

The cookies, she gave away, but that's been a long-running joke between us, much like the tissue thing that I don't wish to explain. But she got me cookies too. This is one hell of a girl. Believe that.

I get over her house, talk with her mom a little bit, and we decide to run to the airport so she can have something mailed out that she needed to send. Then we went for what was going to be a smoothie and ended up being ice cream instead. Finally, we watched a movie and just enjoyed each other's company.

I noticed her look at me a little bit more tonight than she normally does, partly because she was worried I'd fall asleep, partly because she admitted she liked that I was clean-shaven (which is all I need to know to stay that way), and maybe there was something else too. I'm not going to read too much into it, but it was something.

She also showed me what she got me. She gave me an apple-scented candle, a lavendar scented candle, and a pretty candle holder. There were reasons behind all three. The first one was in response to my favorite fruit (and I do love apples). The second was so if I burned it I'd think of her (like I need the help). The third had a lot of blue in it and represented my favorite color (and hers too).

The girl is amazing.

Now I'm way behind on the surprises and I need to come up with something quick. I feel bad enough that she's done so much for me and I feel like I've done so little, but I have no idea where to begin with her. I've never been in this position where I'm the one being spoiled. It's brand new to me, and while I like it, I have no idea how to respond to this appropriately.

Whatever I do, I want it to be special and meaningful to her. I want her to appreciate what I did for her and know why I did it.

I really want this girl to be my girlfriend now, but I can't rush it. It's hard too because she has been so good to me and seems to like me as much as I like her.

I'm very much aware that this might take as long as a month before I can safely ask her out. I want it to be the right time. I want it to be perfect.

I want her to remember when I did it, how I did it, and how much it meant to her. Not just because she's a beautiful girl with an awesome personality, but because she has treated me so well. She deserves the best.

I intend on giving it to her.

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A few minor notes that I want to make here....Following the Indians this season has been much, much easier thanks to the fact that the rebuilding program actually seems to be working. They're competitive, the offense has been better than expected, and other than bullpen woes early on, the pitching has been decent. This could be an interesting season if they can continue to hang around. Only 5 games out in June, not too bad....I'm curious to see how work goes with the stones in me. Monday wasn't good, but I didn't know I had them and might have done too much that day. Should be interesting to see how tomorrow goes. Same with Saturday unless I pass them soon....With Sunday off along with Molly having Sunday off, I'm hoping to get to spend some good time with her then, but I need to think of something fun for us to do. I think next time I talk to her we'll try and come up with something....Speaking of Molly, I need to remember to ask her if she'd want to go with me bowling when my friend Sarah comes back and decides to go. Sarah had talked to me about it and because she wants to meet Molly, wanted to have me bring Molly around....One more Molly note: it's nice to talk to a girl who isn't talking about her sex life all the time (such as Megan!), partly because Molly isn't like that. She's already made her stance on sex very clear to me, something I respect tremendously about her.

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