MY LIFE - NOVEMBER

Saturday, November 18, 2000

Today was probably the first time that the people at Berea really saw my goofy side, the side that I was known for at the old store. I was making comments on everything and tried to keep the mood light, even when Paul and Linda got into a hissy fit over the lead tech mess that's probably a bigger problem than I want to believe it is.

Anyway, I was making comments and made what was actually a somewhat busy day a little more managable. Darlene and Jean, two techs I worked with today, were constantly saying something to me and involving me in their little escapades. I had a lot of fun, probably the most fun that I've had since transferring over, not to imply that the other days have been bad.

The other days just didn't see me get as weird as I got today. It was a throwback to how I used to act at the old store. But that lead tech mess. I just don't know what to say or do about that. It seems that I'm going to have to get involved in this just to get Linda and Paul to stop snipping at each other for a while. It seems that it's time to remind them that I have seniority over them in terms of experience and company time.

That's an issue I'm going to bring up shortly. I'm getting tired of Linda trumpeting her seniority. I had seniority over a lot of people at my old store, but I never went and used it to try and get what I wanted. That bothers me that she's doing that. She's been at that store longer, but I've been working for the company over three years, which gives me seniority over her.

I need to ask Steve if it transfers over to the store with me, which I think it would since it would be stupid otherwise. If that's the case, then I'm going to point that out to Linda and try to get her to be quiet. I'm also going to mention that to my manager and to my district manager and say "hey, I have more experience than either of these two, I should have a crack at it."

I don't feel like doing that, but if Linda's going to turn this into a contest of seniority, I might as well shut her up. I'm also agitated at Paul for saying loud enough for her to hear that he'd challenge her for lead tech. I wanted to smack him so hard when he did that.

That wasn't necessary. She doesn't need to be provoked and that's exactly what he did in that situation. I wanted to tell both of them to shut up for a while, but I didn't because I'm in no position to do that. I know Elizabeth wanted them to shut up about it for a while. It just wore on us listening to the two of them bicker over it all.

Frankly, if that's how they're going to behave, then neither of them should have it and Steve needs to figure something else out. People don't want to work for Linda and Paul keeps talking about getting a different job. It just won't work with either of them. I doubt it will work with me too. I'm not a leader by any stretch of the imagination.

Other than those two, it was a good day at work.

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I didn't go anywhere once I got home from work. I played Legend of Zelda: Majora's Mask for a while before switching gears to the older Zelda game and I watched a little tv too. I was also online for a while, but there wasn't anything going with that so I signed off and did some other things that aren't worth mentioning here.

I do have to call my grandma though. She left a message yesterday that was pretty long. She let me in on what was going on with my dad. Apparently he's out and living with my grandparents and is on some medication to try and help him, although I don't know if that will help him more than it might harm him. It depends on what he's taking.

Anyway, he's apparently looking for a key to the house in Brunswick to go back to it for some odd reason, a move that would certainly put him in jeopardy again, although I doubt he believes it. It would be in his best interest and sell the house (he does owe over $2,000 in child support), but I doubt he'll do that since he wouldn't do it before. Medication isn't going to change his mind.

I'm disturbed by all this information for the simple fact that I wonder what he's going to do next. Is he going to go back to Brunswick, or will he stay in Cleveland and try and get his life turned around? Will he stay clean, or will he go back to the drugs like before? I also wonder if he'll be at my aunt's for Thanksgiving, although that's not going to change whether I go there this year or not.

I have questions, but I'm not sure if I want to know the answers when it involves him. There's always been uncertainty as to what he might do, but that's amplified by him taking several medications. Yes, it stands a chance of helping him, but it could also do him some major harm as well. I'm hoping for the former to occur, but you can never tell with these things until a month or two passes.

I feel if he goes back to the old house, he'll fall back into his patterns and wind up back in jail, this time without any hope of any kind of leniency. There will be no turning him around if that happens. That house, and all the memories, needs to be sold and torn down. It's not in great shape and it would probably work better if a house was rebuilt on the property.

I don't think that will happen though. My dad's a stubborn person who doesn't really care what you and I might think. I'm hoping that he at least realizes what he needs to do before it's too late.

I don't even care about the child support. Yes the money would be nice, but we don't need it that bad. We just need to be rid of that house and everything left in it. He needs to stay with his parents so that he doesn't risk getting off the medication if it's helping him. If he's there, at least he can be monitored to a degree. That's what's best for him at this point.

However, I don't know what he'll do. I guess that I shouldn't worry about it anyway. He can't bother me anymore, so there's nothing I should say about him. I should just move on.

We'll see what happens though. Things can change in a hurry, like last Thanksgiving.