Dear Tech
Support,
I am writing this letter as a last resort. Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 and
noticed that the new program began unexpected child processing that took up a
lot of space and valuable resources. No mention of this phenomenon was included in
the product brochure. In addition, Wife 1.0 installs itself into all other programs and launches
during system initialization, where it monitors all other system activity.
Applications such as Poker night 10.3,
Drunken Boys Night 2.5 and Saturday Football 5.0
no longer run, crashing the system whenever selected. I cannot seem to
keep Wife 1.0 in the background while attempting to run some of my other
favorite applications. I am thinking about going back to Girlfriend 7.0, but
uninstall does not work on this program. Can you help me, please!!!
Thanks,
Joe
Dear Joe:
This is a very common problem that men complain about, but it is mostly due to
a primary misconception. Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 with the
idea that Wife 1.0 is merely a "UTILITIES &
ENTERTAINMENT" program. Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM
and designed by its creator to run everything. It is unlikely you would
be able to purge Wife1.0 and still convert back to Girlfriend 7.0. Hidden operating
files within your system would cause Girlfriend
7.0 to emulate Wife 1.0 so nothing is
gained. It is impossible to UN-install, delete, or purge the program files from the
system once installed. You cannot go back to Girlfriend 7.0 because Wife 1.0 is not
designed to do this. Some have tried to install Girlfriend 8.0 or Wife 2.0 but end
up with more problems than the original system. Look
in your manual under "Warnings -
Alimony/Child
Support." I recommend you keep Wife 1.0 and just
deal
with the situation. Having Wife 1.0 installed myself, I might also suggest you read the
entire section regarding General
Partnership Faults (GPFs). You must assume
all responsibility for faults and problems that might occur, regardless of their cause.
The best course of action will be to enter the command C:\APOLOGIZE. In
any case avoid excessive use of the "Esc" key because ultimately you will have to give the
APOLOGIZE command before the operating system will return to normal. The
system will run smoothly as long as you take the blame for all the GPFs. Wife1.0 is a great
program, but has very high maintenance. Consider buying additional software to
improve the performance of Wife 1.0. I recommend Flowers
2.1 and Chocolates 5.0. Do not, under any
circumstances, install Secretary with Short
Skirt 3.3. This is not a supported
application for Wife1.0 and is likely to cause irreversible damage to the
operating system.
Best of luck.
Tech Support
Adam Schantz
A Letter To A
Computer Tech Support