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| Episode 10 Gayja: Welcome everyone and welcome back to a all new episode of the Gayja show via internet. (crowd cheers) Gayja: It has been a long time but we are back. And when I say we I mean Bob is also back. Bob: I missed you Gayja. Gayja: I missed you too. So what have you been up too. Bob: Uhh. I waxed my tan lines and I have got a butt implants. Gayja: Butt implants!! I have been thinking of getting that done, how does it feel. Bob: They feel real as yours. Gayja: Really. After the show you need to let me feel. I have to give you credit, you look delicious. Bob: Are you hitting on me? Gayja: No I mean....I am just expanding my vocabulary. Bob: Oh.. Anyways, the only thing bad about this implants are that you get massive cramps. Gayja: Well anyways, I have had a great vacation and saw sum super stars. Bob: Like who? Gayja: I saw Oprah with a donkey. Bob: What's so specail about that? Gayja: Oprah bull ^*%*( more than the donkey. (crowd cheers) Gayja: Anyways, here is my special guest, Pauly Shore. (crowd is confused) Pauly: Awwwwwwwwwwwwwoooooooooooo... What's up Gayja. Gayja: Long time no see. Bob: Literally. Pauly: What do you mean? Gayja: Ok, lets not get off on bad terms. Welcome to the show Pauly. Pauly: I am glad to be here. Bob: It is not like there is nothing better to do. Gayja: So what have you been doing latey? Pauly: I have been taking a break from the movie scene Bob: An 8 year break. Pauly: I have spending all of my time writing music. Gayja: Oh I remember that one song, "Lisa, Lisa" Bob: I just proves that he is an idiot. Pauly: Man, What is with you. I am so mad that everyone is on my back!! Bob: Maybe because you can't act or sing. Gayja: Hey, hey, hey, come down you guys. Pauly: Shut up you stupid gay #@#$. Gayja: Excuse me Mr. Movie Star, you can yell or choke Bob's life out of him but when you call me gay, you have another thing coming. You sick &%*^%. Bob: Oh, that's my dog. Pauly: Well it not like you have a hit show anyway. Gayja: It is not like you ever had a good show either. Bob: True, True Pauly: Well, look at you , you look like a member of the Villiage People. Gayja: Ok, now I know that you did not just dis the Villiage People. Bob: Oh, I think he did. Gayja: You sick &%&%. Bob: Oh snap!! Gayja: Let me tell you something. The villiage people have raised up mens rights to what it is today. While scumbugs like you take advange of everything they give us. Do you think that Bob Dole could have EVER sold those plasure pills without the Villiage People, or did you EVER think that without the Villiage People, Geogre Bush would have never choked on a pesel. Have you. Pauly: Well No. Gayja: Well you should have, you sick #@%%@*#. Bob: No Gayja No that's his Spleen!!! Pauly: OOOHHHH, my $#@%$# spleen. Gayja: Die, Die. Pauly: No, Not the Pan...... Gayja: What have I done!!!! Bob: uuuhhh, nothing. It is not like anyone is going to noitice that he died. Gayja: I feel so alive. (crowd cheers) Gayja: Anyway, Next Week our special guest is going to be none other than Brittany Spears. So, if you no talent or fake boobs tune in next week on the Gayja Show.... |
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| Episodes 10-6 |
| Episode 6 Gayja: Hello folks, welcome to my show!!! Today is a special show. We have the president of the United Stats on your show!!! (Crowd Cheers) Bob: You mean the last president. Gayja: Shut up, who told you that you can speak. What do you think I'm stupid. Bob: Yo mama. Gayja: Wll anyway theres big news in the world today. WWF (World Wrestling Federation) changes their name to WWE. It doesnt' roll off your tonque like WWF huh. Yeah and in other news Hooters changed ther name to the jugs from heaven. That doesn't sound good either. Bob: Nope, it should be called "Are they real". Gayja: Shut up Bob. Your not funny. Bob: Or maybe they should call it "Juicy Melons" Gayja: Ok that wasn't funny either. In other news George Bush was at a school. His wife was teaching the kids how to read while Bush was trying to learn his ABC's. (Crowd laughs) Bob: And you say that I'm not funny. Gayja: Lets bring him out, the LAST president of the United States Bill Clincon!!!. (Crowd cheers) Bill: hello fellow Americans. Gayja: Hi, Bill your my hero. Bill: Well thanx, I tried my hardest to put up this company. Bob: You say hard. Bill: Oh... yeah I did. hahahaha. Gayja: Bob shut and get out of the interview. Bill: Hey I got one too....Hooters should be called Tits'R'us. Bob: (lol) Dude you are the bomb. Bill: Only I, can raise the roof. Gayja: Lets get back to the interview please. Bill: Ok, I am sorry. Let's do it. Gayja: I here that you are writing a book. And they are paying you 4 million dollars to write the book. Bob: Yeah and it is called 1,000 sexual postions. Gayja: Get the *#&^ out of here!!! (Bill is laughing) Bill: That was a good one. Gayja: So, how are you and your wife doing? Bill: I don't know, I haven't seen her in a while. (Bob and Bill laugh) Gayja: So I hear that you are going to have your own Talk Show. Bill: Yes and my first guests are going to be Pamala Anderson, Jenffer love Hawitt, and Sarah Michele Galer. Bob: What About Monica. Bill: I swear I didn't have sexual relations with that woman. Gayja: Forget it. I give up. Just call it The Bob Show. Bob: That would be cool. Bill: You said Wood. Bob: No Gayja, I am sorry. I can't let you leave. We.....We are buds. Bill: You said WEWE!!! Bob: I am coming out and saying it. Bill: What? Bob: Your my best friend, and I love you man. Gayja: I love you to man. (They hug and the auidence is in tears) Bob: But do you want to call it the Bob and Gayja show. Gayja: Shut up you Jackass. Bill: You called him a Donkey. Gayja: Well we are out of time but next time we are going to have our Season Finale. Bob: What??? Gayja: Yeah During the summer the Gayja show and crew will be on break. So next time see our special guest |
| Episode 7 Gayja: Welcome to my special show. We are back from the long summer vaction and we are having a costume party!!! (Crowd Cheers) Bob: This is so cool, I can try out my now costume I just bought. Gayja: What the heck are you suppose to be a human gas rag? Bob: No, I am a poodle. I cute, cluddly, overgrown poodle. And what are suppose to be my Fairy GodMother? Gayja: Well actully I am a Fairy. I am that Fairy from Peter Pan. Bob: That stupid fairy that tries to get Peter Pan in Wendy's Room. If you now what I mean. Gayja: No I don't know what you mean, well shut up. Bob: Roof!! Gayja: Stupid Dog. You make me look bad. Just go over there and go lick yourself. Bob: Maybe I will. Gayja: Well anyway, here is my guest, a moviestar slash singer. J-Lo. J-Lo: Hey. Gayja: Hey J-Lo. How is everything. J-Lo: Good, I can see that you are having fun with your fairy costume. Gayja: Yes, I bought it from this wonderful guy. I think you know him. He goes by the name of Slim Shaddy. J-Lo: (laughing) really? Gayja: Yea, I loved this one the best. The other ones, the toto's and whatever there called are to small. He is a skinny guy. J-Lo: I didn't know that you guys were a thing. Gayja: What!!! I am not Ga y if that is what you are asking. He might be but I am surely not!! J-Lo: Sorry about that. It is just that you look ga y in that fairy costume. Gayja: Yea, What do you know. All you do is sleep your way to the top. You walk around with that big fat butt and get anything you want J-Lo: Excuss me? Gayja: I am sorry, truely. I am just tried of people thinking I am ga y. J-Lo: I am sorry too. Gayja: Group hug. (Crowd awwws) J-Lo: Are you cring? Gayja: No, no, it is just the Mascarah. J-Lo: What the $#@$. What the heck are you doing. Bob: What? I am sniffing your butt. What? J-Lo: You sick freak. Gayja: What the heck Bob, Get your half bald @$@ out of here. Bob: It is just something that would never happen during your dog years. I had to do it. My wolf pack was counting on me. And I did it. Gayja: Get out of here. You ugly humping dog. J-Lo: The nerve of that guy. Gayja: I am so sorry. Group Hug? J-Lo: No, This show is stupid I am leaving. This show has no management or meaning whatsoever. Gayja: That isn't true. Your creator's Magnificent. J-Lo: No he isn't, he is probally a poor, ugly, little guy. With no good taste of style. That watchs wrestling and plays video games all day. Gayja: D ang, you nailed it perfertly. Bob: Hey Jennifer, what is your best assest. J-Lo: I'm out of here. Bob: Make sure to book two trips. One for you and one for those juciy, shakin-bacon buns. Gayja: You ruined my show once again, Bob!! Bob: I'm sorry, what can I say, I'm a dog. Gayja: I need another summer vaction. (Crowd cheers) Gayja: Anyways, next week we are going to go deep down to the heart of Texas, to meet Stone Cold Steve Austin. Bob: Oh, Maybe I should shut up next show. Or I might be dogfood. |
| Episode 8 Gayja: Welcome to my beautiful show everyone. Today I pumped up and really to meet by favorite WWE star Stone Cold Steven Austin (Crowd Cheers) Bob: What? Gayja: Don't start the chant Bob: What? Gayja: Well speaking of WWE did you see Chuck and Billy getting married. I was so happy for them that I even dressed up to watch it. Bob: You put on a women's What? Gayja: It is not like I am ga y or something I was just getting in the mood. By the way those leopeod thongs are a just little uncomfurtable. Bob: What? Don't make me think what your hairy butt would look like in a thong. Gayja: Shut Up, by the way I shave my butt so don't call my butt hairy. You can call it the Kurt Angle butt. Oh and that is a nice shirt your wearing. Bob: Thanks. Gayja: Where did you buy it at the 99 cent store. Bob: That wasn't funny. Gayja: Well here is the legend himself the Rattle Snake Stone Cold Steve Austin. (Crowd Cheers song playing is Bob George) Steve: Hey, What the h ell is this, this isn't my song. Gayja: Sorry, we didn't have the money to pay the WWE. Bob: I told you he wanted the Backstreet boys. Gayja: Anyways, everyone is wondering why did you leave the WWE? Steve: Well, this is a hard question. I left mostly because I am not happy with the story lines on the show. They s uck. Gayja: I think you left because you are not the big thing anymore. Bob mummbles: What big thing, oh that. I think you nedd vibagra Steve: What? If you have something to say you say it to my face, jac kass. Bob mummbles: I think he left because he's ga y. Gayja: Coming back to the questions. Did you have problems with Vince? Steve: Of course, he is going in the wrong direction with things. I look like a fool when I fight people like Ric Flair for a match. He doesn't even belong in the ring with me. Bob: Maybe he wanted to be the one my Chuck's side and not Billy. Steve: You son of a.. Bob: I see the way you lick your lips when you see him saying: "Hey Chuck, do you want a big sip of my Stevewiser?" Steve: Shut up because I open up a can of whopa ss. Bob:......... Steve: What are you deaf? Well I been known to know a little bit of sign language so here's to ya. Gayja: Settle down, settle down. Bob: It is my fault he loves to touch people in local places. When he wrestles Chuck, Steve is saying, "Now suplex me sexy" "Pin me down you big guy." Steve: Up yours. Gayja: Ok whatever, you guys need to calm down. Steve: Tell him to shut up. i need a drink!!! Bob: Stevewiser's taste like pee. Gayja: There was news that you beat up your wife is that true. Steve: Yes, I was drinking and I couldn't control my temper and I am better now. Gayja: What do you mean, you su ck, you can't do that to your wife. Bob: it is just that didn't have his daily Action from Chuck. Gayja: Or maybe he got kicked out of a ga y bar for not wearing shoes. Bob: That joke sucked Gayja. Steve: I can't take this. let's go Randy. Bob: Randy??? Gayja: Oh, well next week we are going to have Emienm. Bob: I hope we have enough Censors. |
| Episode 9 Gayja: Welcome everyone to the show. I am your host Gayja and next to the flying peinguin is my sidekick Bob!! (Crowd Cheers) Bob: Hello eveyone. Gayja: Well we had a little break but don't worry the Gayja Show is back. Bob: Heck yeah! Gayja: Well Bob, have you heard of the sniper lately. That little *^%*^*^ been shotting people for no reason. Bob: I heard that his lover is his sniper gun. He lost his viginalled and shot off his manhood at the same time. Gayja: Well at least, he was born with both things because now he can just go as a girl. Bob: Hey and they haven't even caught your lover Bin Laden. Gayja: What are you talking about. It was only a one time thing. No just kidding. Bob: You sick freak. What the heck does Bin Laden want anyways? Gayja: Your mama. Bob: Hey you leave my mama out of this. Gayja: Well anyways here is my special guest Slim Shaddy. (Crowd Cheers) Slim: yo homes. Gayja: wasssssssssuuuuuuupppppppp. Bob: waaaaaaaaasssssssssssuuuuuuuuuupppppppppp. Gayja: wwwwwwaaaaaaasssssuuuuuuuupppppppppp. Slim: What the hell are you guys doing? Bob: What are you the only white person that can act black. Slim: I don't try to act black *(*^%^* Gayja: Hey, Hey, Hey clam down. Just clam down. Slim: He started it. Gayja: Ok lets get started with the questions. Slim: Okay, No problem shot. (The Crowd Ducks) Gayja: You are staring in a new movie. Now, how could you get us to go see the movie? Slim: I Could scream and yell at you and cuss you out on my next album. You son of a #@%#. You better see my movie or I will kill you... Gayja: No, I mean tell us what it is about so we can deside to see the movie. Slim: Oh, why didn't you say so. Well it is about a man that grew up in the gangster paradise that finds out that his life is full of @%$$ and that he finds music can help him though it. Bob: That kinda sounds like Britany's Crossroads to me. Slim: You shut your @$##@& mouth before I shut it for you. Bob: Your movie still sucks either way. Gayja: Next question, why the anger. Slim: What are you taling about. I don't have a @#$#@# attatude. Bob: You make fun of everyone, Moby, Chirstina, ICP... Slim: Well Moby is a bald freak. Chirstina is a #$#@. And ICP just sucks. Bob: Well we all knew that ICP sucks. Gayja: So you came out with this new single that to me reveals the truth. Slim: yes it is about my #@$#@# life. Bob: So it is true, you are gay. Slim: What are you talking about I am not gay. Bob: I should have known that when you talk about gays in your songs, sing with Elton John, and now sing a song called Coming out of the Closet. Slim: I am not #@$#@@ gay you @!#$@! @!#$!#!. Gayja: For the first time in a long time, I agree with Bob on this one. Slim: You guying are @#$#@@$ I am leaving. Bob: We he crying? Gayja: I think he was. Bob: Well look at the bright side, at least we will become more famous when he sings about us on his new song, "The Day I became Gay". (Crowd Cheers) Gayja: Well everyone this is the end. Next Week it is going to be the tenth episode. I am very exited. So stay tuned and see you later. |
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| This is a funny character I made up so me and my friends can laugh. The names and companys I mention is used so I can make my Friends laugh and I am sorry if i offend you because this is my sense of humor. |
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