| ARTICLES |
| Blockbuster Video: The Things They Don't Want You To Know Includes description of enemies, revelations of secrets, and all-out insanity. |
| Mr. T's Job Hunt The story of his fall from fame to welfare |
| Hepatitis Taco Crisis or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Eat Band-Aids The true story of when a taco fights back. |
| Alf's Guide to Depression Feeling sad? Let Alf give you that mental Band-Aid you desperately need. |
| Random Crap Movie Productions: The World Premiere Introduction to the best independent film studio in the world and descriptions of two of the former network's greatest movies |