macking
looking for a date; 1995, Knight-Ridder News Service
Mae West
1: -n- [chiefly mil] an inflatable life vest
2: -n- a parachute entangled in its drogue lines so as to form two small,
ineffectual cups; compare
roman candle
mashed
1: -adj- muscular; He's really mashed.
masturbation, euphemisms for
audition the finger puppets; backstroke roulette; bash the candle; be a
virtuoso of the skin flute; beat off, ~ the bishop, ~ the dummy,
~ the meat,
~ the stick, ~ up your date; beef stroke-it-off; bleed the weed; blow your
load; bludgen the beef steak; bop the banana, ~ the balogna;
box the
bald champ, ~ clown, ~ jesuit and get cockroaches;
buff the banana, ~ the
bannister, ~ the muffin; burp the baby, ~ the worm;
bust a nut; butter the
corn cob; choke Kojak; choke the chicken,
~ sherriff and wait for the
posse to come; clamp your pipe; clean your rifle; climb Mount Baldy;
closet frisbee; cold air fuck; come into your own; cook the cream of
cock; corral the tadpoles; couch hockey for one; crank the chank; crimp
the wire; crown the king; cuff the carrot; diddle; do
a hand job,
~ battle with the purple-helmeted warrior of love, ~ handiwork,
~ the janitor
thing; drain the monster; engage in safe sex; fist [He likes to fist
himself.]; fist fuck, ~ your mister; five knuckle shuffle;
flog the dog,
~ dong, ~ hog, ~ mule; fondle the fig, ~ the Pope; friggit;
gallup the
antelope; genitalic stimulation via phallengetic motion;
get a date with Fisty Palmer, ~ Handrea and Palmela,
~ Mother Thumb and her four daughters, ~ Rosy Palm (and her five sisters),
~ Rosie Hancock, ~ Slick Mittens; get the German soldier marching;
get to know yourself; give it
a tug; go a couple rounds with ol' Josh; grease the pipe; hack the hog;
have a conversation with the one-eyed trouser snake,
~ a J. Arthur [British rhyming slang -- J. Arthur Rank, rhymes with
wank, Brit. for masturbate], ~ it off,
~ sex with someone you love; hitchhike to heaven,
~ under the big top [reference to masturbation under bedcovers];
high-five Yul Brenner;
hold the sausage hostage;
hug the dog; hump your hose; jack hammer, ~ off;
jazz yourself; jerk off;
jerkin' the Gherkin; juggling the coullions [French for testicles];
knuckle shuffle on the old piss pump; lope the mule;
make instant pudding, ~ the bald man puke;
making love alone; mangle the midget; manipulate the
mango; manual override; master bacon; meet Rosie Hancock [or any of the
other under get a date with];
milk the cow, ~ lizard; mount a corporal
and four; nerk your throbber; null the void; oil the catcher's mitt;
onan's olympics; pack your palm; paddle the pickle;
paint the ceiling, ~ pickle;
pat the bunny, ~ puppy;
peel the banana, ~ some chiles; perform
diagnostics on your man tool;
play a little five-on-one, ~ in a one-man show,
~ five against one, ~ pocket pinball, ~ pocket pool, ~ tug of war with the
cyclops, ~ Uno; please your pisser; plunk your twanger;
polish the banister, ~ family jewels, ~ rocket,
~ sword; polish Percy in your palm;
pound off, ~ the bald-headed mouse,
~/ing the mound, ~ the pud, ~your flounder;
pull off, ~ rank, ~ the carrot, ~ the cord,
~ the five-knuckle shuffle, ~ the goalie, ~ the pole, ~ your prick,
~ your taffy, ~ the python;
punching the munchkin; ram the ham; ride the great white knuckler; roll
your own;
rope the pony, ~ pope;
rub off, ~ one out; run off a batch by
hand; sacrifice sperm to the god of lonely nights; scour the tower of
power; self abuse; self-induced penile regurgitation; shag;
shake hands with the unemployed, ~ your John Thomas,
~ your wife's best friend; shemp
the hog; shift gears;
shine the helmet, ~ your pole;
shoot putty at the moon, ~ skeet, ~ the moon;
slaking bacon; slam the ham, ~ spam; slamming the
salmon; slap high fives with Yul Brynner;
slap the carrot, ~ clown, ~ donkey, ~ pud, ~ salami;
slapping pappy; sling the jelly; snap the monkey,
~ rubber, ~ whip; solo sex; spank the frank, ~ monkey,
~ salami; squeeze the cheese, ~ juice;
stinky pinky; stir the yogurt; stoke it; stroke it, ~ off,
~ your poker; stroke the one-eyed burping gecko, ~ dog,
~ satin-headed serpent; take matters into your own hands,
~ the monster for a one-armed ride, ~ part in population control;
tease the weenie; tenderize the tube steak;
test the testicles, ~ your batteries; the art of unisex;
tickle my fancy, ~ the pickle;
toss off, ~ the turkey; twang the wire; thump the
pump; tweak your twinkie; varnish the flagpole; visit SAC headquarters
under Mount Baldy; whack off; whack the dog,
~ one-eyed worm, ~ plank, ~ weasel, ~ willie; wank;
wax the carrot, ~ dolphin; wax your surfboard;
whip off, ~ up some sour cream, ~ your dipper;
whip the dubby, ~ wire;
whizzing jism; wixen; wonk your conker; work off; wrestle the eel; wring
out your rope; wrist aerobics;
yank off, ~ the crank, ~ your plank, ~ the yoyo
Note: practically all the euphemisms for masturbation
are considered at least mildly offensive by most people,
and often all references to sexual anatomy are considered
very offensive and should not be uttered in mixed company;
see sex
meatspace
the physical world, as opposed to the virtual;
also carbon community;
compare F2F
megaboss
a whole lot [alt.folklore.urban Jul 96]
melvin
a wedgie [heard on Comedy Central's The A-List
from Jenine Garofalo, about 1994]
MFWIC
[Mother Fucker What's
In Charge] the boss; see miffwick
miffwick
[from MFWIC, Mother Fucker What's
In Charge] the boss
Military
| All Services | big chicken dinner, blanket party, BOHICA, FIGMO, FNG, ROAD, SLUF |
| Army | chief, gun bunny |
| Marines | boot, gunner, rhino |
| Navy | bluenose, boot, crabfat, elephant's ass, geedunk hoover pig boat, shellback, turkey wog, |
| Air Force | air force gloves, bone, boner, canned, doolie, guppy, habu hog jeep, lead sled, pickled, rainbow, roach, shirt, viper, warthog, wingnut, zoomie |
miller time
quitting time at work; finishing up a project or class;
compare bail
[from an advertising campaign for Miller Beer]
mondegreen
When someone mishears lyrics as another, more or less coherent,
phrase. For example, I know someone who thought that the refrain in the
poem The Charge of the Light Brigade went "Haffley Gaffley Gonward" --
which he thought was something of relevance to the British Army --
rather than "Half a league, half a league onward."
The term "Mondegreen" itself is a mondegreen. It comes from an old
poem about how a young hero was killed
in battle and "the Lady Mondegreen." Or so the person who heard the
poem spoken thought the phrase went. It was actually "they laid him on
the green." [Bill Warren, 13 Oct 95, FIDO Film conference]
There's a book on this subject called
I Led the Pigeons to the Flag
monkey suit
any formal dress, probably fm the organ-grinder's custom of dressing his
performing monkey in an ornate suit [best guess from the WORDS echo
crowd]
moral majoritarian
a member of the Moral Majority [Elizabeth H. Penrose, FIDO Science
Fiction conference, Nov 95]
Moscow
The adjectival form of Moskva, in Russian, is Moskovskij. Given
the German and Polish tradition of writing our v sound with w, it's
not surprising that it came to us in the form Moscow (or perhaps
Moscowa); thereafter, it was just a matter of vocalizing according to
English usage of the letters, and dropping the terminal a if it was
present. (Why the adjectival form? Perhaps in a critical first dispatch,
a diplomat or traveler wrote about "the Moscowa nobility," or something
like that. Since we have noun-noun modification in English, the
recipient might easily take it for the name of the city.) [Dick H.
Fredrickson, 3 Oct 95, FIDO Words conference]
mouse potato
the on-line generation's answer to the
couch potato [from e-mail, Aug 97]
Mr. Blue
nitrous oxide, from the color of tank medically pure NO2 is stored in
[alt.folklore.urban July 95]
muff
1: -vt- to make a mistake; I muffed that job.
2: -n- euphemism for a woman's crotch;
see vagina
multiplice
plural of multiplex, a complex of movie theatres
my bad my mistake; possibly from bad on him; his mistake [heard widely in the USAF from 1992]