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 [Oekaki Central]
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soldiers!

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Age: 17
deviantART: KG-in-the-Cloud
fanfiction.net: kogekusai_gohan




Credits

All images and words on this site are mine except where there're obviously not. The table html came from Sanctuary. Thanks to Aim for setting up everything for me. And the rest is all Gohan. Yo.
If some of the code on this site isn't working for you, grab internet explorer and conform, you mozilla hippies! or whoever it is what can't understand plain english!





Cool Things

Click to enlarge where aplicable.

I think my cat might have a disease of some sort...

shoulda seen this coming

omfg!

The TRUTH

HP4: the Parody

That Froody Web Page

Well here, may I present the Magnificent Kogekusai Gohan's Webpage yo! (Keep in mind she is slightly insane.)
-----------------------------
Is this page not froody? Crazy. Words. Here you will find (in order)...
The Whenever I Feel Like It Non-Blog, my Dolls, my fiction story: FFY, short stories, frood of the month, quotes, Fan Listings, Gifts, credits, and a nifty little marquee.

Whatever

2/8/07 -- Um, happy new year? It's the last chapter of FFY!!!

10/16/06 -- OMG! Could it be?! Three whole new FFY chapters?! It's too good to be true! And that's because it's not! One of them is a total fake! O_o

6/30/06 -- Check it out! New FFY chapter. Had to find something to do with my FF7 2nd disk continuing to be broken... Feel free to bother me about typos.

6/20/06 -- These bushes will be the death of me

5/27/06 -- It was totally worth it to go to the midnight showing of X-men 3, to here the reaction of everyone who knew about a certain video when the Juggernaut said "I'm the Juggernaut, bitch!" Or maybe it's something he said in the comics, or ther people who made the video had some insight. I think he said it like a catch phrase... Anyway, bleeding hilarious, british dude!

5/5/06 -- NOTHING kicks more butt than KH:CoM manga. Technically, the same author does the manga for all three games, but he takes so much more license with CoM. And, he kicks ass. Sora&Co running into a wall in an attempt to pull off an inpromptu Trinity Limit? GOLD! Picasso Axel? ULTIMATE-ROFL! And now Amazon.com has acknowledged its existance! Woompah!

4/23/06 -- Almost a month later... and I'm still all about the KH2. Just wanted to note... Sora fires cannons bad-ass. Sticks his foot up there while pirates are trying to jump him from all sides and BLAMMO! He is shooting something explosive, it's going to be devastating, and he might not know why he's doing it but it sure as hell aint for your benefit! XD
Oh, and I made a t-shirt...
nobodies = teh suck.


3/29/06 -- For your constant perusal, should you feel the need, here is the potty-mouth pinnacle of Roxas-Hater poetry/music. If I had a mike, I might just sing a little mp3, but I don't and so the world turns. This is called "Eat Shit and Die, Roxas":
Eat shit and die, Roxas.
Eat shit and die.
You're a loony jerk,
And you try to steal the show,
But you're just a loony jerk,
And you should
Eat shit and diiiiie, Roxaaaaas!

3/22/06 -- Mr. Barham revealed one of the most calmly hilarious contests (there's always the myriad of contests such as those seen on Bonzai that normal people won't compete in) ever to us in SenAdvEng today. That was 2nd hr. This is 3rd hr. In which I screw around on the comp. And I'm clever enough to be able to update my site from ANYWHERE! BWAHAHAHAHAHA! But anyway, this contest originated at some college I don't remember, and it's to make the Worst First Sentence of a Novel EVER. Most of the winners he showed us didn't sound like beginning sentences at all, which I hold against them. One could argue that a beginning sentence that doesn't sound like a beginning sentence is a really good bad one, but that defeats the purpose, I think. Here's mine: "Far from the Illuminated Fate," said the cloaked and daggered man, who was bleeding, "there was a hut of glorious bad taste (like really old cheesecake), and maybe some heady smoke was forthwith protruding from so, and in this miniscule mansion was... a man with a hat!" Here's Garth Nix's (not specifically made for this contest, but I know that's what he was trying to do): "High above the dusty plains, an eagle whose wings stretched from side to side soared and soared and... soared." I dare you to post yours in the forum, I mean the Tag Board...

3/6/06 -- Another update in under a month! Alright! Might see another FFY chapter someday... Updated the TRUTH a bit, still waiting for Aislin to draw Sora whacking Riku with a 2x4 (TOTALLY DESERVES IT!). And Added my HP4 movie parody. Both are in the cool Things section.

2/25/06 -- Oh shit, since when was it the new year? Three days till March, eh? Puts you in mind of KH2, right? Heard about the consternation surrounding KH2's rating, or lack thereof? Here's the TRUTH.

11/3/05 -- I stockpile quotes and then release them in expensive limited-edition packages. I mean, free. I haven't been doing ANY final fantasy y, because I have been extremely busy. Not to say that I will never have the time for it ever again. I also updated the Links section, because I love the internet.

10/1/05 -- Because the Saturday night schedual on Cartoon Network has changed yet again, the Bo-in-the-plural show is now that thing that comes on after Naruto and before Adult Swim, so I actually saw it. My conclusion after the first episode (I guess) is that... BO IS A PICKLE RACIST! Although, were I ever confronted with a talking pickle, I would probably stomp it to death straight off... Also, I'm never going to watch it again. I'll TURN OFF the tv at that time.
And the satelite guide's description for this week's episode of Inuyasha ADMITTED that the he-she from the band of seven was indeed a woman. So there!

9/19/05 -- HAPPY TALK LIKE A PIRATE DAY, YE WEEVIL EATIN' BILGE MONKEYS!

9/11/05 -- Chapter 22 is up for FFY. I have some more quotes and dolls but they're all half done. Also, my layout is back to the theme I used when I first made the three columns into two (big thing). Hitchhiker's Guide is coming out on video in 2 days!!! Party!

8/12/05 -- Well, I'm actually doing stuff lately! Two new dolls. One's me sporting my new haircut and new fav clothes, the other is completely random, done as a representaion of its name. Drink and be merry, or something.

8/10/05 -- New story and... ANOTHER CHAPTER IN FFY!!! Aren't you just estatic? Okay, so I figured that giving a story a title like MPatMPoD might make someone expect a Harry Potter parody, so I went back and made one.

7/5/05 -- New Cool Thing (new things at bottom), also the Frood of the Month, and I have added more fun-filled quotes (new things at top). I like my Gaara chibi-fied, not dead.

6/2/05 -- Okeee, the shots are down, and a frood of the month is up. Also, new Chapter 2. Remeber, beware the high ground!

5/20/05 -- Hey, for a limited time you can snag some great Naruto screenshots by clicking here or clicking the "click it" in the cool things section. I am actually running low on webspace because I don't pay squat, this is just a way to enjoy the anime without taking up major gigs on the harddrive. Bwarp.

5/11/05 -- Been very busy, lots of tests, etc, etc. Also, Hughes is camera shy. BUT! I finally have the Frood of the Month up for May, it's Mayes Hughes! R.I.P. Hughes, we love you!!!

4/23/05 -- We got a new vacuum today. Lots of other things happened in the immediate past as well, but this is important. Our old vacuum cleaner was breaking down before I was born, and in the past few years has picked up a rather nasty smell that engulfs the user anytime they turn it on. Also, pieces were breaking off. HOWEVER! As far as I know, the belt never broke. Enter new vacuum. Beautiful, light weight, tech-looking, bagless yellow bunch of niftiness. We could SEE that it was picking up enough dog hair to feed an elephant, if it were hay. Then, not 10 minutes into use, the belt brakes (not without reason, mind you, but still very sad). I hadn't even gotten to clean off the cat's chair yet (very, very sad). The end.

4/17/05 -- LOTS of new quotes, so that I can load my page at school and start laughing in the middle of class.

4/9/05 -- Took the ACT today. Let's just say that I didn't like it. Let me reiterate that I took it TODAY (well actually it's pretty close to tomorrow now) so if anyone asks me how I did, I obviously don't know and I'll smack the questioner soundly with my Stat book, which seems to follow me around like a lost puppy these days. I have this to say about the test, though: English section's a joke, so's Math if you're at all competent, Science would be a joke if it weren't for that creeping time limit. Well, I was all for getting out of that testing room a.s.a.p., at least we didn't get the room with the noisy aquarium...

3/30/05 -- 'Nother Frood of the Month, and for the record I have every intention of buying every english volume of Naruto as they become available, so there. And another doll, who was supposed to have some chains draped artfully over his poor soul but it didn't work out. And I've discovered that D&D rocks my socks, I think I'd make a hilarious Dungeon Master.

3/24/05 -- Now that it's spring the ants have arrived, crawling innocently across my computer screen to get at my cat's food. It's so sad- OMG! There's another one! *BLAM BLAM* ARG! One's on my arm! *SMASH! tinkle* Ow my arm... At least the ladybugs stay around the window. *BLAM BLAM BLAM!*

3/2/05 -- Because it makes me so happy, I'm going to post the dialogue for an unfinished project in art class:
Girl: Fish food!!!
Nov: Where are my slippers?
Ec: You'll have no slippers and like it!
Ec: No, right enough.
Guy: Wait! How could your cheese do this to me?
Ec: Just for a dollar, too!
Nov: Mmmm, cheesy slippers..

2/25/05 -- Got some cool things up in another new section, also two new dolls, both of which are kinda fanart. And before I go, I want y'all to think about this: Humans are the superior race because, unlike cylons, they can walk up and down stairs without falling.

2/19/05 -- Got a short story up! Interior decoration is not a very scary phrase...

2/14/05 -- Against common sense I signed up at Kings of Chaos. If you're a nice person you'll give me soldiers! Nuthin' to it, and no killer bees! Just click the link, click the number, and I'm on my way to self-made tyrant! Oh, and feel free to do it once a day, like the pill!

2/13/05 -- Took a quiz today, because I miss school (ha ha). I was very close to wrath...
Sloth
Which deadly sin do you represent? (Angel Sanctuary Pics)
brought to you by Quizilla

I'm gonna get eaten by snakes ^^

2/11/05 -- Added Frood of the Month section, because it seemed like a good idea. Right now it's looking pretty lame but the bell rang at school and I had to leave. *sarcastic crying at having to leave school*

2/7/05 -- Lookit me! I'm lazy! At least now I have someplace to point to when people never ask "Where's FFY?" Speaking of which, I have edited the first chapter so it's ten times as funny. ha ha.

Dolls (froody)

This is the stuff I do instead of homework. Dont steal, but if you copy them and say that I, kg, did it, I will feel like I kick that much more butt.



Fuah! Twin swords! Eat it! it's an inside joke between me, myself, and my cat best. pants. ever. There's something about bowler hats...
|Base by Aislin|
tako still owes me a toaster... there's a story behind this, but it is long and uninteresting yo. me on a good day Wanna let it burn, let it burn, let it burn. the plauge on TMR the mad scientist gets a job... woot for scrubs!
I do all sorts of things...
a game: guess where these people are from!
Actually, it's Tazuna from Naruto, but what's the dif? He was the one who started the scarf-belt trend! Ah-hahahaha! He will smite us all, smite us good, I say! Be careful when bulldozing a forest, one of those plants might have a gun... shades of black are such a pain -_-
|Bases by 2Pixel|

Final Fantasy Y (The X broke so it's Y now)

Kingdom Farts (better name pending)

Another parody in almost the exact same format as FFY, only there will be no player's guide because I don't have one. Right now, it's just the prologue, in which I make some fun of the Organization.

Table of Contents!
0 A Prologue

Short Stories-ish

Mostly they come from dreams...
Napoleon: You get to vote! For real this time! There will be bowler hats!

Majora Potter and the Meat Puppets of Doom: They say your dreams are supposed to be your brain sorting the information of the day...

Majora Potter and the Meat Puppets of Doom, The Parody: Seriously this time. I don't dream anything this normal.

Frood of the Month

August 2005
Tako Tako Tako
I hope you are having a great afterlife, Aim.


July 2005
BOOGA!
I LOVE Diana Wynne Jones, I mean I would be a lesbian time traveler if I could. THE best writer I have ever know, and she's from Britain, too, so no surprise. Her stories are insanely creative and the characters are something else. I am still in love with Howl, which has its own problems because he doesn't exist...


June 2005
Insanely curious about this...
Unfortunately, anyone's appreciation of this movie must have been drowned out by StarWars3 anticipation, but irregardless, the Hitchhiker Trilogy was a beautiful, beautiful thing. Douglas Adams should have a statue built in his honor, 20 stories tall, solid ultraplatinum. Let's all go hug our copies of the Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy.


May 2005
We love you! Come back soon... as a zombie or homonculus or something...
YES! Mayes Hughes r0x0rs my s0x0rs. He is, of course, from Fullmetal Alchemist, the show where Munich and London are really the same place, and you can find a replacement metal arm in any universe you happen to find yourself in, but don't expect much from any place that doesn't believe in alchemy! Sweet, sweet, Hughes, we shall avenge you, and by avenge I mean hunt down the FMA writers and slap them silly with my bo. You heard me! I'm coming for you, you great bastards!


April 2005
OMG! A kamikaze bird!
Gaara rocks, Naruto rocks, evil-Sasuke can walk off a cliff, long live crazy ninj4 powers and eccentric fasion. Woot for Naruto! And Masashi Kishimoto who writes/draws it.


March 2005
I bet pete was just dying to start this story arc...
Sluggy Freelance, written and drawn mostly by Pete Abrams, has a comic EVERYDAY, and they're nifty, funny comics; no crap machine here!


February 2005
sexy lab, woot for mad scientists!
Dracula (Richard Roxburgh) from Van Helsing the movie. That guy is such a frood. It's the way he yells at people, I think.

Words to Live By

I think that's fairly self explanatory...

kg: i think it's pretty ridiculous that harry can firgure out what dobby was trying to tell him about Tom's diary from some crappy miming and yet didnt realize that Snape knew exactly where harry had learned that dark curse and had pointedly asked about his potions book
Aim: I don't think anyone has ever accused Harry of being exceptionally bright.
kg: but the miming! i would never guess. i would think dobby was pantomiming what he would like to do to his master
kg: and snape was so painfully obvious
Aim: Maybe Harry speaks mime. A sideeffect of Dobby trying to kill him.

Giles: *swinging* Come on, put your back into it. A Watcher scoffs at gravity.
--Buffy

This is a stick up! And this is a stick down, on your stupid head.
--kg

in every one of my dreams i always avoid random violence toward walls, unless i get thrown through one and that's not my fault
--kg

there is a national block party or something tonight! i'm going to be an ass and paint a bunch of cardboard boxes like alphabet blocks, then throw them at people
--kg

Librarian: Whatcha lookin for?
Vold: MY SOOOUL!!!
Librarian: *nods sagely* I know what ya mean, man.
--kg, refering to HP6

H: A voice? Saying what?
T: I don't know that it was saying anything. It was... whooping.
H: Whooping?
T: Gleefully.
H: Was it male or female?
T: I would hazard a guess at male.
H: And it sounded happy?
T: Very happy.
H: As though it was celebrating?
T: Most definitely.
H: And then--?
T: And then I called out 'Who's there?'
H: You couldn't have found out who it was without asking?
T: The Inner Eye was fixed upon matters well outside the mundane realms of whooping voices.
H: Right.
--Harry the Horcrux (HAhahahaha) and Trelawny, HP6

And Harry Potter's now having an argument with his Keeper. I don't think that'll help him find the Snitch, but maybe it's a clever ruse...
--Luna (NOT the moon, damnit!), HP6

Zoidberg: Wakka wakka wakka wakka!
Leala: Oh no! He ate Fry! Fry is dead!
Fry: No I'm not! I had another guy!
All: Hooray!
--futurama, anthology of interest TWO!

No space-squids were hurt in the making of this comic. Maybe a couple of regular squids... but none from space. We couldn't find any, and we looked. Really hard. Twice.
--Zap!

-Don't eat! It's people! It's people! Maybe not the chicken part, but who knows?! Who knows!
-What abot the cherry pie?
--BuffytheVampSlayer

I've got some interesting stories to tell you, too.
Did you die?
No...
I'm gonna win.
--Buffy

Listen, you disgusting creature, I've got one thing to say to you.
Against me you've got no chance to survive so you better make your freaking time!
--elgoonishshive

I think Oasis'll be fine. This isn't the first time she's been blown up by a self-destruct mechanism in an evil lair before my eyes.
What a nerd-boy.
Hey, What's up with me and evil lairs?
--sluggy

Torg: Well, um, the clone had us all for dead, but then she... uh... fell down the stairs!
Aylee: ...Um... yeah! Hit a doorknob too!
Torg: And stubbed her little pinky toe on a coffee table!
Aylee: And after that she just lost the will to live!
--sluggy

Well, theoretically, no one would get hurt. But I was working under the theory that Cloney's new form would be identical to Steve from Blue's Clues.
--Schlock, sluggy freelance

It just feels wrong! I'm getting this image in my head of a little soybean running around screaming 'PEOPLE! Tofu is made out of PEOPLE!' OH, THE BEANMANITY!
--Torg, sluggy

Bert: I'm moving out!
Torg: What? Why?
Bert: You guys are too weird!
Torg: We got you a new hat!
Bert: My crotch salutes you! Adios, 'bah'-chachos!
--sluggy

Zoe: Where's Riff?
Torg: Inside. He's in a cast. Broken leg. He's all depressed over Sasha leaving. Or maybe he's still bummed over me shooting him.
Zoe: Sasha left? And... you shot Riff?
Torg: Just a little! I didn't mean to! Really!
Zoe: 'A little' was enough to break his leg?
Torg: No, Aylee snapped it in half while trying to kill us all.
Zoe: Aylee tried to kill you all?!
Aylee: Not me!
Torg: It wasn't the real Aylee! It was a brainwashed clone!
Zoe: Maybe we should start with something a little more innocuous. Ahem. Gwynn, I like the new haircut!
Gwynn: I hate it but a lot of my hair got scorched when Riff's truck exploded.
--sluggy
A powerful guy needs a powerful wedgie
--Torg, Sluggy Freelance: TPatSN

I refuse to work for ugly people. . .guess what. . . your ugly
-aislin

We all know pi r square, but today pie are justice.
-simpsons, Pieman episode

He can't hold his ale!
I can't hold me ale!
--Brothers Grimm movie

Good people of-- Owww... that was a long ride.
--Brothers Grimm movie

Aislin: you know, eating stuff that is pink is a lot better than wearing stuff that is pink

Maybe that's just what elven warp gates look like?
Nah... They're elves. Their warpgates would be like, gigantic, with glowing symbols and crystal crap, trimmed in gold, and basically say, 'Our form of instantaneous global travel is better than your form of instantaneous global travel.'
--errant story

All hail our future-overlords! Concede!... CONCEDE!
--deviantart

A TREASURE CHEST - Damn! How did THAT get by me?
--cap'n slappy, talklikeapirate.com

"Is it just me, or are all these rooms starting to look the same?"
"Damn! He's on to us, kupo!"
--Sora in Chain of Memories, and my imaginary kupo-buddy

Dear diary, today I was pompous and my sister was crazy.
Dear diary, today we got kidnapped by hillfolk, never to be seen again. It was the best day ever.
--Jayne, Firefly show

kg: i need to find a floppy disk...
Lix: oh?
kg: to burn the project to
kg: that is... not burn it
kg: you dont burn floppys... you magnetize them, yup
kg: *lights it on fire*
kg: i need to find another floppy disk...

I vastly prefer the term "Pascallesque." As in "This triangle of numbers related by a common equation is really great, but couldn't we put it in space to make it more Pascallesque?"
--Ian Jay, Zap! forums

Using stale french bread as a weapon, interesting... Who threw the loaf?!
--bobobobo... bobobobo, give or take a bo

kg: It's pizza from the future!!! O_o
Aislin: Really? Were? *looks about*
thothonegan: There! *points*
kg: the lunch ladys have actually gotten ahead with the food. it's not week-old, it's day-young!
thothonegan: yay for patented FFT(Food From Tomorrow) technology.

You bought the rumor you simpleminded diletant!
--I don't know, do you?

Avoid the noid, he ruins pizzas!
--simpsons

1 America has people from everywhere in the world.
2 American has british people.
3 American people will likewise be in Britain.
4 If Americans will cross a friggin' ocean to get to Britain, French people will surely cross a Chunnle (hell, they might even commute).
Thus there are French people in Britain and if JKRowling wants to be racist, then fine, there won't be a new French professor named Bertrand.
--kg

Whoa... My chi is so out of whack, I overlooked a giant snake!
--Sasuke, Naruto

Oh... Me? My name is Hatake Kakashi. I'm the kind of person who doesn't feel like talking about his likes and dislikes! My dreams for the future are none of your business... but anyway I have lots of hobbies...
--Naruto

The Chuunin Exams have begun... with a written test! Yes, brace yourself for a full volume of white-hot test-taking action!
--Naruto

Are we on comms?!
Yes, you are both on comms.
--Alias

It's rare for all of you to treat me... Is it going to snow?! Or are you schemeing something? Nope, you aren't. *BAMPF! Attack of the Giant Boxing Glove!*
--Kakashi, Naruto (anime)

OMG! It's... YOU! whoever you are....
--kg

I'll destroy you, girl... and your little Sasuke, too!
--Zaku the Otonin, Naruto

Challenge Vader again? Chromosome?
--http://www.sithsense.com/flash.htm (someone explain this to me)

Person: OMG! Is that a LIVE Ferret around your neck
Me: Why, yes, yes it is. Do you like it ? *pets ferret*
Person: . . .
--Aislin

If we can make a really high-pitched loud noise, then she'll... she'll know there's someone stuck in her jaw... That's probably not going to help, is it?
--Arthur, Drowned Wednesday, Garth Nix

Aim: And my icon is Malfoy
kg: why is his ear glowing?
Aim: New kind of spell
kg: for ears?
Aim: Yea
kg: fasinating

kg: ah, well, i guess SHE can be the navigator, and i'll drive...
kg: you can man the torpedos
Aislin: wooop
Aislin: best job ever
kg: because when we took my car in for a tune up, the guy offered to attach torpedos to the underside of my car at a discount, and I said "HELL YEAH!"

You better keep your nose clean.
That'll be easy, I never wear the damn thing.
--Futurama

What's the point in living if I can't be beautiful?
--Howl, Howl's Moving Castle(movie)

kg: oh no, there is cat hair all inside the printer...
Aislin: how does that happen. . .
kg: well, there is cat hair everywhere else...

That question is less stupid, though you said it in a profoundly stupid way.
--Futurama

-It came from somewhere else.
-What do you mean, like Europe?
-No, Robbie, not like Europe!
--War of the Worlds (movie)

-That Punch and Judy show started at eight thiry and went on till nine fifteen. I know because there was a clock just over you. They say I declared war at nine o'clock last night. Did either of you notice me declaring war?
-No. Though, I was being beaten to death at the time and I might not have noticed.
--Magicians of Caprona, Diana Wynne Jones

I'm gonna beat you down for talking so weird... fancy-pants!
--megasXLR

-This is why you're always gonna be the size of a bean!
-A bean?!
-Yeah, a bean!
--Winry + Ed, fma

-I am Valentinez Alkalinella Xifax Sicidabohertz... Gumbigobilla Blue Stradivari Talentrent Pierre Andrt Charton-Haymoss Ivanovicci Baldeus George Doitzel Kaisser. Don't hesitate to call.
-What are you talking about, Mr. Vash the Stampede?
-Oh! I hate it when you call me by my full name!
--Trigun

Staring: there's just no explanation for it.
--commercial

If Al is nothing more than a soul attached to that metal, does that mean that he can also double as a stone and a storage container of food?
SPOILER ALERT! Yes.
--adultswim bump

Metal arms! Get your metal arms here! Perfect for fighting huge armored opponents. Guaranteed to be defect-free the first 2000 miles, or you're screwed.
--adultswim (concerning FMA)

-Dog, huh? ... I love dogs!
-You really mean it?
-Of course! Dogs embody loyalty; they follow their master's commands above all else! Be a jerk to them and they don't complain, and they never once beg for a paycheck! Trust me, Ferry, they're the great servants of man! Boyo, canine, how we salute thee!
--FMA

You could've killed me, John! You chose a higher path! Look how well you're doing!
--Gab, Constantine

Judge: Baliff, place the mayor under arrest.
Sideshow Bob: what? Oh, yes, all that stuff I did.
--Simpsons

I am the cursed farmer, I mean armor...
-- Al, fullmetal alchemist

I dance, I dance, I dance; around the mexican hat. I dance, I dance, I dance; and that's the end of that; Or is it I guess I'll keep singing, my phone it appears to be ringing-
--Simpsons

I was tortured once. I didn't like it.
--once upon a time in mexico

What's that, daddy?
Why that's Mercury, the planet closest to the sun. What it's doing on the warf I haven't the foggiest...
--Family Guy

Oh my god, is that Kenny?
Hi, my name is Kenny.
Yes, it's Kenny.
--Scrubs

-So that means, when I'm completely plastered I'm as smart as you...
-Smarter!
--Monk

Krunka lunka dunk-ady darmguards--
Shutup!
--Futurama

The earth is in danger of exploding!
(what? again?)
--dbgt

My name is... Vash the Stampede-ah! Ladies and gentlemen, sorry for the lack of warning but it's time for my daily massacre! And if you don't believe I'm the real thing, take a long look at me and start freaking out! Observe: my red coat, my lovely blonde locks, and if you're still having doubt check out my 100% accurate gunmanship!
--Trigun

You're always trying to give me potatos, what is it with you?
I just think they're neat.
--simpsons

In Bastok, chocobo rides YOU!
-- 8-Bit Theater

Sergeant Ferry, during your physical examination a few days ago malignant athlete's foot was found and is affecting your brain.
-FMA

Tomato + Potato = Pomato
--FMA

Are you saying I'm crazy?
No, no. No one's saying that. But I'm certainly thinking it loudly.
--Futurama

It's a Tuesday, an you know what that means: UFOs!
--JtHM

-Is it on? I can't hear it.
-It's high pitched only animals can pick it up.
-I knew that, I was testing you.
--2 scientists, Cowboy Bebop, Stray Dog Strut

Is Dr. Pepper a real doctor? I'm getting suspicious, I dont think he's qualified to be a soft drink.
--Sauron, Legendary Frog

I would like to meet a sticky end. Like, death by bubble gum; or caramel...
--kg

Is this a good hospital?
Depends on what you mean by good. These chairs are nice.
-- House (tv show)

Students = cans of soup
--Kaplan

I like some of you half as much as I know half of you three fourths of a large number of you seem to be a fraction of who you are!
-- Lord of the Things

Now everyone: who can tell me what Ghenghiz did wrong?
Didn't say please?
Whut?
No.
Didn't say thank you?
Whut?
No.
Hit the man over the head with a melon and thumped him into the strawberries and kicked him in the nuts and set fire to his stall and stole all the money?
Whut?
Correct! Ghenghiz, you were doing *so* well up to then.
-- Interesting Times, Terry Pratchett

And when were you ever in Ephebe?
Went bounty hunting there once.
Who for?
You, I think.
Hah! Did you find me?
Dunno. Nod your head and see if it falls off.
-- Interesting Times, Terry Prachett

Now pie that Brownie, fruitcake!
-- Mr. Burns, Simpsons

A simple technique to hold to ball to your head with intense suction! Try this at home, kids!
-- Vash, Trigun

Daniel: *frowning* This tastes like chicken.
Carter: So what's wrong with it?
Daniel: It's maccaroni and cheese.
-- Stargate SG-1

-Hurry, Macen- whatever!
-Macentire!
-- Ed's dad and his assistant, Cowboy Bebop

So that's what things would be like if I'd invented the fing-longer.
-- Professor, Futurama

Zim: I put the fires out.
Leader guy: You made them worse.
Zim: Worse, or better? *nods*
-- Invader Zim

Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons for you are crispy and taste good with ketchup.
--Dilbert, apparently...

When you find yourself in the company of a halfling and an ill-tempered Dragon, remember, you do not have to outrun the Dragon... ...you just have to outrun the halfling.
--Thinkgeek.com

We're from Canada.
-- Sliders

Oh my God, the Golden Gate Bridge... It's blue!
-- Sliders

kg: sounds as fun as a cake on fire
Aim: that does sound fun
kg: not if it's your b-day cake that you were gonna eat
kg: or if it's your b-day cake and you already ate it

Aim: It’s casual dining. We are not casual. We’re disgusting.

I understand why they do this, but after 80 episodes of Pokemon, even I wonder why Team Rocket doesn't just kill themselves and end the misery.
--author, A Modest Destiny

If you were to beat forty gongs and a hundred tin tea trays with spades and axes, while ringing ten templefuls of bells and throwing a thousand cartloads of bricks and a similar number of sauce pans down from the Observatory tower, you might have some notion of the noise.
--Year of the Griffin, Diana Wynne Jones

???: Shall we continue?
O'Neil: By all means. To Hell with us.
--Stargate SG-1

-Then we’re going to Bermuda.
-Bermuda? But, Bermuda kinda sucks.
-We know, we’re gonna bomb it.
-- Sealab 2021

Oh dear! Such is life in a big city. Welsh rarebits, huh? Fine dish. Not!!! Oof! I think I'll get up. I can't sleep. Nope! I'm done for. Oh! Oh!
--Early Works III, McCay

It'll take two weeks to get the parts?! I dont know. I'm feeling awfully forgetful these days. What would happen if I couldn't remember my spells? Why, it might take me a couple of weeks to relearn those spells, and by then it'd be too late to save your village. What a travesty. What an easily avoidable travesty.
--White Mage, 8-Bit Theater

We believe that the dementors are currently taking direction from Lord... Thingy.
-- Fudge, Harry Potter and the Something-or-Other

Ron: Oh, I'm gonna have to chop it off!
Hermione: No you're not, Pomfrey cant fix that-
Ron: It's too late, I'm gonna have to chop it off!
--Prisoner of Azkaban movie

Odion: All right master Malik, now what do we do?
Malik: Now you get to go and do all of the things that I taught you.
Odion: You mean how to look pretty without a shirt?
Malik: Everything except that.
Odion: God damnit!
--Malik for a Day, Tsuni Kanesagawa, fanfiction.net

Norway?
Population: Crab
Export: Trees
If kenya was able to physically urinate all over norway as well as metaphorically then the orange dotted line on the right would indacate the most probable trajectory to ensure a good coverage.
HOLY CRAP. LIONS! TOURS
KENYA. BELIEVE IT! Free snorkal with every visit.
-- A Weebl thing

Oh, no! the robot's in a loop and Fry is an idiot!
--Futurama

Oh, yeah, it's just a harmless little bunny rabbit.
--Ted, Monty Python and the Holy Grail

The box! You took the box! Now let's see what's IN the box! ...Nothing! Absolutely nothing! Stupid! You're so STUPID!
--Kuni, UHF

Ever wish that Spike would go after Vash?
We do!
$$60,000,000,000 is a lot of money.
I wonder what that's worth in woolongs?
Probably some Coke and some nachos.
Mmmm nachos...
--Adult Swim Bump

Seth: I would like to buy-- what are you doing?
Shop keeper: Dancing
Seth: I see....
--Secret of Mana Theater

Salad? Are you kidding? I want a steak. Rare. I want it to moo when i fork it.
--A Modest Destiny

Wolfwood: You mean we can't kill THEM?! [them is giant hungry worms]
Vash: No, we can't kill them!
--Trigun

This is the kind of castle King Arthur would have lived in, if he were a fiddler crab.
--Fry, Futurama

CITIZEN SNIIIPS!
--Roosevelt's head, Futurama

kg: you know, not knowing Modest Mouse should be considered a crime
Aim: not having see the Rain Man should be
kg: well, it's settled, then, we are all violating the law and should go to jail
Aim: they'll never take me alive
kg: what if they use tranquilizers?
Aim: but the whole pt of not taking me alive, is not taking me alive
kg: but that doesnt mean they dont have other ideas
kg: if they just went along with everything you said, they wouldn't be after you in the first place
kg: ... unless that's what you wanted...
Aim: right

Futhermore, dementors can fly now. I think the purpose of granting them flight was to emphisize their resemblence to B-2 Bombers...
--kg

well, i considered that, but then i consulted with the pink people of the moon and they say that's just not true, their socks are all called Murphy, and the matresses are all Zen and they eat school macaroni&cheese
--kg

Aim: I see... it all makes sense now.
kg: Don't lose any sleep over it.
Aim: I'll try, but seeing as how the door affects you...
kg: Well, that's different.
Aim: Uh huh
kg: The door is full of malice and evil intent
Aim: Because it's a door...
kg: That it is

Anyone who is capable of getting themselves made President should on no account be allowed to do the job.
--one of those hitchhiker books, Douglas Adams

Human beings, who are almost unique in having the ability to learn from the experience of others, are also remarkable for their apparent disinclination to do so.
--same as above

POPULATION: None. It is known that there are an infinite number of worlds, simply because there is an infinite amount of space for them to be in. However, not every one of them is inhabited. Therefore, there must be a finite number of inhabited worlds. Any finite number divided by infinity is as near to nothing as makes no odds, so the average population of all the planets in the universe can be said to be zero. From this it follows that the population of the whole universe is also zero, and that any people you may meet from time to time are merely the products of a deranged imagination.
--and again

I don't think I've ever been critical of the money Douglas Adams makes, especially since, as has been tactfully pointed out, I myself have had to change banks having filled the first one up.
--Terry Pratchett

Life is anything that dies when you stomp on it.
--Dave Barry

Hey, guess what, everyone! I have formed a solution to the problem-you-didn’t-know-existed! And if you did, then whatever!
--kg

Aim: so you are going to pay them
kg: mebe
kg: from my swiss bank account
Aim: uh huh
kg: because everyone has an account in switzerland
kg: even the ones who dont

kg: really, he didnt win in the matrix
Aim: yes he did
kg: defend that claim
kg: but with no b.s.
Aim: smith always wins
Aim: he is everywhere
kg: there, that is b.s.

kg: some ninjas are hippies who live in the wild
Aim: like robin hood
kg: er
kg: he's not ninja
Aim: but he's a hippie who live in the wild therefore he must be a ninja
kg: er
kg: that's not neccesarily true
kg: i said that some ninjas were hippies in the woods
Aim: look a square is a square and a rectangle is a rectangle
kg: that does not mean that all hippies in the woods are ninjas
Aim: and people are people and men are men
kg: niether does it mean that all ninjas are hippies in the woods
kg: or that if they live in the woods and are a ninja then they must be hippie
Aim: so men must be squares and people must be rectangles
Aim: it is all very simple once you look at it objectivly
Aim: robin hood is a hippie who lives in the wild so therefore he must be a ninja
kg: furthermore, most ninjas arent rectangles OR squares
kg: but are still men AND people
Aim: but squares are rectangles
Aim: and men are people
Aim: and men are squares
kg: the same goes for about half the population of the world
kg: squares are indeed rectangles
kg: but rectangles are not always squares
Aim: look look look, you are getting it all wrong
kg: no
Aim: yes
kg: i don think so

Gifts for Me

Click on the image to see who gave it.

a good sign to stick in your yard proof that no one really knows what color my hair is ^^ It's like superman: puts glasses on- where the hell did superman go? Oh, hello, Clark. OMG! it's him!

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