In modern society, many fail to make eye contact with passersby, and hesitate to smile or offer a greeting.  Particularly if from a large urban area, we are encouraged by our parents, schools, peers, and law enforcement personnel not to be "too friendly".  In mid-Victorian America, where politeness was next to godliness and a sense of community was far stronger, strangers felt more compelled to acknowledge one another, and men often felt duty-bound to help a lady. This is not to say that everyone behaved so, but to read the diaries and letters of many women who worked in or visited camps, we are inclined to believe that men and women did interact in military situations in a "courtly" manner. But, as many women were there to render aid and comfort to the sick and wounded, the natural demeanor of the ladies and soldiers would naturally be one of kindness.

While re-enacting, whether working in a civilian camp or gaining entrance to a military camp, a lady should be pleasant and a gentleman, courteous. It is never appropriate for a lady to visit a camp unescorted or without appropriate passes from an officer. Not only does military protocol dictate that - and the lady stand in risk of not being admitted to the camp - but mid-Victorian etiquette also dictated it.

During the War, women gained entrance to military camps for many reasons. For example, some came on business with the US Sanitary Commission; some with the Christian Commission; others as nurses; some searched for their dead or wounded loved ones and friends; or some came as volunteer soldiers’ aid. No matter how good or altruistic a cause brought them there, though, women would not have gained passage through the lines to an encampment without at least one pass, and often a multiple number of passes.

Some women came to help entertain the soldiers in hospitals or, on occasion, the camps, by singing, recitation, dramatic readings, and tableaux. For the most part, those sorts of entertainments were conducted by lady volunteers. For those who were laundresses, camp followers, or prostitutes, they were either there with appropriate permission of a commander, or were brought in illegally by the soldiers. Civilian camps as we know them are a concoction of the 20th century re-enactor, and did not exist. As they do exist for us out of necessity in modern encampments, it would seem best to attempt and follow period etiquette in interacting with men or strangers entering camp. In 1861, a lady's place in the War was at home, in the hospital, or at the rear (assisting the wounded and relief agencies), but never in camp unescorted.

Women whose behavior had earned them a demotion from "lady" to "harlot", "trollop", "whore", or "hooker" (although that sobriquet was not created until the War, as a result of the camp followers that seemed to be so conspicuous and prevalent around General Joseph Hooker’s army) were able to insinuate themselves into or around military camps or hospitals. The vast majority of such women were poor, and quite often were addicted to alcohol or drugs such as laudanum (a combination of alcohol and opium) and opium. Many became ill with sexually transmitted diseases; Confederate General A.P. Hill was debilitated at a critical point in the War due to a venereal disease contracted in his younger days. However, they did not always comport themselves around the camps or hospitals as the corset-and-chemise-only clad strumpets that we see all too often at re-enactments, or in badly researched movies about the period.

Prostitutes found in the camps were normally dressed when not actively earning their keep. Their clothing, rather than being the fanciful feather boas and scarlet red ostrich plumes, was far more apt to be plain and simple, and in a condition that reflected their own relative state of poverty, which meant that they were often dirty as well. They were generally unlikely to be adorned with elaborate or heavy makeup. No different from today, many went into the trade of prostitution because of their poverty, ignorance, lack of skills, desire for "easy money", addiction, or abuse; and some simply because it appealed to them, at least at first.

While they would have been either ill-used or ignored by the general populace, there are many instances in diaries, journals, and letters in which relatively kind or benevolent treatment was meted out to such women by the soldiers - at least in the daytime.  Treating them as ladies does them no harm, nor does it depreciate the value of a gentleman's upbringing.