Stages in the Development of Erotic Power Exchange ~ Poems ~ Agreement of Service ~ Back to the Dungeon Entrance ~ E-mail ~ Art Gallery ~ BDSM Basics ~ A Checklist for Submissives ~ Suggestions for Dominants ~ Rules for Submissives ~ A Beginners Guide to Dominance and Submission ~ Safety Rules for First Meetings ~ BDSM Jokes ~ BDSM Physical Safety Tips ~ Sensual Spanking ~ The Nine Levels of Submission ~ Advice for Dominants ~ Back to Page Two ~
If you're a dom and you think that a "crop" is this autumn's wheat harvest...You ain't.
If you're a dom and you think a sub needs lettuce, tomato and pickles...You ain't.
If you're a dom and you think your sub can stay underwater for weeks...You ain't.
If you're a sub whose idea of punishment is taking a bath before sex...honey...You AIN'T!
If you're a sub who thinks the "power exchange" is where you pay your electric bill...You ain't.
If you're a dom who thinks that "edge play" is spitting over the side of a bridge...You ain't.
If you're a sub and you think "taking it to the limit" is an Eagles' song...You ain't.
If you're a sub who thinks that "sub space" is a Star Trek communications mode...not only are you NOT...but you're a geek!
If you're a dom and you think "topping" is what Dairy Queen puts on your banana split...You ain't.
If you're a sub who thinks "bottoming" is what happens when your car shocks break...You ain't.
If you're a domme who thinks that "surrender" is what happens when the Vice Squad breaks down your door for pandering...You ain't.
If you're a dom and you think "nipple clamps" are plumber's tools...You ain't!!
If you're a sub who tries to buy "clitty litter"...You ain't.
If you're a dom and you think "orgasm" is the art of Japanese paper folding...You ain't.
If you're a dom who thinks that handcuffs come in only two styles: fur-lined and miniature keychain...You ain't!
If you're a dom who thinks that "blindfolding" is packing away your duck blind at the end of hunting season...Forget it...You ain't.
If you're a D/s couple and you think "a scene" is having an argument in front of company...You ain't.
If you're a sub who thinks that a "G-spot" is a one-thousand dollar bill...You ain't.
If you're a D/s couple that thinks that "role playing" is something that you do at the craps table...You ain't.
If you're a sub and you think "release" is how your dom got out of jail...Then you definitely ain't.
If you're a sub who thinks that "scarification" is something you get after a boob job...You ain't.
If you're a sub and you head for the barn when told to put on the harness...baby, you ain't.
If you're a dom whose idea of the "perfect scene" is a Bud Lite commercial at half-time...You ain't.
If you're a sub whose idea of "service" is what you get at a filling station...You ain't.
If you're a sub and you think that "submission" is something that requires annual renewal...You ain't.
If you're a sub and your idea of oral sex is telling someone to "F off"...Then you ain't.
If you're a dom who thinks that a "red bottom" is one of them there "foreign" beers...You ain't.
If you're a dom who thinks that "a paddling" is something you do when the trolling motor on your bass boat runs out of gas...You ain't.
If you're a sub whose idea of "breast bondage" is having to wear an underwire bra...You ain't.
If you're a dom who thinks that a "slave contract" is a right you lost in the War of Northern Aggression...You ain't.
If you're a domme and you think a "cock ring" is a place for fighting chickens...You ain't.
If you're a domme who thinks that "boot worship" is one of those New-Age religions...You ain't.
If you're a sub and you think a "foot fetish" is an obsession with 12 inches...You ain't.
If you're a dom and you think "suspension" is something that holds up your pants...Then you ain't.
If you're a dom and you think a "cat o' nine tails" is what your pet will give birth to if you live near a nuclear power plant...Then you ain't
If you're a domme who thinks a "pillory" is something used to remove unsightly hair growth...then baby, you ain't.
If you're a dom who thinks "bondage" is a series of spy movies...Then you definitely ain't.
If you're a sub and you think you think a "spreader" is something used to fertilize your lawn..Then you ain't.
If you're a sub and you think a "hood" is where you live..Then you ain't
If you're a sub who thinks that a "gag" is the end result of oral sex...You ain't.
If you're a dom and you think a "ball gag" is a joke about sports...Then, honey, you ain't
If you're a dom who thinks that a "rack" is a place to store your rifles...You ain't.
If you're a sub who thinks that a "dildo" is a really dumb extinct bird...You ain't.
If you're a dom who thinks that "stocks" are something rich people invest in...You ain't.
If you're a sub and you sewed up your split-crotch panties...Then you ain't.
If you're a dom who thinks that a "yoke" is something you dip your toast into each morning...You ain't.
If you're a sub and you think your G-String goes on a guitar...Then you ain't.
If you're a dom who thinks that "spermicide" is a mass whale-beaching...You ain't.
If you're a domme who thinks that "AstroGlide" is your telephone psychic...You ain't.
If you're a sub and you think "BDSM" is an new oldies radio station...Then you ain't.
If you're a dom who thinks that "fetish" is some kind of goat cheese...You ain't.
If you're a sub who thinks "K-Y Jelly" goes on toast...Then you ain't.
If you're a sub who thinks that "bustier" is what you become after a boob job...You ain't.
If you're a domme who thinks that "C&BT" is a place where you'd like to open a savings account...You ain't.
If you're a sub who thinks that "24/7" is an all-night convenience store...You ain't.
Stages in the Development of Erotic Power Exchange ~ Poems ~ Agreement of Service ~ Back to the Dungeon Entrance ~ E-mail ~ Art Gallery ~ BDSM Basics ~ A Checklist for Submissives ~ Suggestions for Dominants ~ Rules for Submissives ~ A Beginners Guide to Dominance and Submission ~ Safety Rules for First Meetings ~ BDSM Jokes ~ BDSM Physical Safety Tips ~ Sensual Spanking ~ The Nine Levels of Submission ~ Advice for Dominants ~ Back to Page Two ~