"The 24-hour hyperactive klepto with the ability to play notes on his saxamaphone for three consecutive weeks."
--John

"Did you get that on sale, Jeff?" "Yeah, five finger discount."
--Chris

"Holy shit! Hide the chocolate. If it weren't for the shock therapy the band bought for his birthday, the kid would never sit still."
--Brett

"Someone get the tranquilizers."
--Rich

"One woman at a time Jeff!!You really have to get over your desire for a lesbian in the band, it's not gonna happen!! Sorry!"
--Jodi

"Give me back my name damnit, I had it first. Anyways, you spelt it wrong."
--Geoff

"Can you say, take a chill pill?"
--Brian