Van der See gloated over the sight of the MercVerk city under seige by 100,000 crack(ed) Roder and Boda troops. Surrounded on all sides, it was time that MerkVerk learned that he wasn't a puny opportunist who loved horses more than sheep (but which came a close second).
"I say, Woger - is wain expected?"
"Wayne, your Equineness?"
"Not him! That cloud over there, and muffled thunder. Is there wain expected?"
"No, your Splayship. It could be more reinforcements arriving for our seige. I shall send
Captain Gel Ding of the Rangers to enquire". A horseman wode off.
"Woger - it is more twoops! I can hear them singing..."
Now we're inside and that's where we're gonna stay,
Bringing lots of messy, bloody death to the Roder,
Swinging our swords and twanging our bows,
Bringing lots of messy, bloody death to the Roder,
We look cool (look cool), we're a hit (a hit)
(Look cool, a hit) and the Roder's in the shit!"
"Hmmm - that doesn't sound wight. Where's that wetched wanger person?"
Right on cue, a medium seige engine delivered the unfortunate Captain mere
metres from Woger, a wed wuin of a Woder.
Starting to feel nervous, Van der See flicked strawberry jam off his jade and vermilion jodhpurs (with satin trim and diamante spurs). He peered at the approaching horde, "Hmmm, whose twoops wear black and silver? Look at that banner, Woger - it's got a white chicken on it! Who could that be?"
"Err, white chicken, milady? I don't think so, not with those talons and beak...perhaps a duck?"
"Mmmm, no, looks more like a silver eagle"
"Or...hawc, perhaps?" They looked at each other "Oh, shit". The bwave Roder leadership called for thier favourite mares, decided there wasn't time, and called for thier escape chariots instead.
The arrow storm that followed cleared a way through the backs of the hapless and ill-led Roder "elite" (muffled chuckles and bemused head-shaking).After slicing through the enemy, the Merc Verk army entered the city to the sound of cheering and the uncorking of a nice chilled bottle of LaToose '56. The seige was broken.
And in a totally unrelated incident in the skies above, a hawk swooped and broke its unsuspecting prey's neck.....
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