Scooby Doo (The Show... I like the dog, and especially Shaggy, the rest of the cast and the fact that Cartoon Network reruns the show all night long can go cram large shards of glass in their colons)
Saddam Hussein
MTV
Traditions
Fishing
Loud People Who Think They're Funny
Beastie Boys
Car Commercials
Baseball
Insecurity
Chocolate Bunnies
Dharma and Greg
Steamed Vegetables
Extremely Sunny Days
Warm Weather
9 Volt Batteries
Tube Socks
Oversized Magazines
Anxiety
Bare-Assed Monkeys
Bees That Are Attracted To Me
Phone Calls From Important People
Boring News
Getting Hit In The Nuts
Yellow Lights That Look Green
Organ Music
Papercuts
Forwarded Joke Emails
Gravity
Mushrooms
Headaches
Shaving
Gold Thumb Tacks
Stamp Collections
Cold Sandwiches
Skim Milk
Computer-phobic People
Things That Rhyme With Kloppyright Trotection
Jokes That I Don't Get Within 5 Seconds
50 Degree Temperature Drops While I'm Asleep With The Fucking Window Open And A Fan On
People Who Hand Out Raisins on Halloween
Little Geocities Corner Boxes
CD Drives That Sound Like Jets
Spiraling Plastic Slides Supercharged With Static
That Fucking Baby In The Sun On The Teletubbies
Scratch And Sniff Stickers That Don't Smell At All
Donuts That Look Cream Filled But Aren't
Must See TV
Popup Ads With False Close Buttons
Non-Mint Toothpicks
Post-"Salute Your Shorts" Nickelodeon
Papayas
Non-Clever Custom License Plates
The Dewy Decimal System
Zoos
Grizzly Bears
Mensa
Large Quantities of Hard Candy
Multiple Forks For One Meal
The Fact That No Juke Boxes Have Wumpscut In Them
Red White And Blue Basketballs
Multi-CD Games
Christmas Lights That Don't Do Anything Special
Small Fish Tanks
People That Put Animal Heads On Their Walls
Satanists
"No Fear"
Stupid Poodle Haircuts
People That Think They're Weird Cuz They're Stupid And Loud
When My Shoulder Makes Sounds Like A Turkey Being Ripped Apart
Silk
A Fucking Ball Dropping That Represents A New Year
Big Ants With Wings
BBQ Flavored Chips
Tin Cans Full of Shitty Cookies
The Guy That Talks On Those Hip Hop Compilation CD Ads
The sound of a fan hitting a finger.
The feeling of a fan hitting my finger.
Teachers that think green chalk looks any different than standard chalk to me.
That some people seem to be living in a Saved By The Bell universe.
Jesus Christ rain is coming through my window.
Men that base their manhood on their vehicles.
Women that base their manhood on their vehicles.
Batteries not included.
Misplaced waste products.
Sand paper across the top of my fingernails.
The fear that my Xbox may one day bring me impotence due to a tragic accident with the CD tray.
Stains that don't, at least, look interesting.
Good service on an airplane when I WANT TO SLEEP!
Diving boards that don't award possums to the 100th customer.
Big red question-marks on my tests (Or, as I call them, WTF-marks).
Rappers that say the year in their songs. (I don't feel very cool when the song I'm listening to goes "Ohh yeahhhh... 1992")
