The Adventures of UltraMuffin and Burrito #1

Is this what deformed brains think like?

Classroom Seating Patterns

It takes a keen eye to notice such social atrocities.

Janet Jackson

The missing link to life's end.

Vision Resolution

Oooooo, bitmapped nipples!

The Power of Knowledge

Step by step instructions to achieve perfection.

Pink Spheres of Expanding Happiness

This one gets a bit gritty. Be strong and be careful!

Nocturnal Scanline Parallelism

A little thing inspired by my odd sleeping patterns.

The Firecracker Incident

Something I posted on a Digital Paganism message board... obviously in search of attention.

Dirty Twinkies

Nothing has ever been as clear to me as this subtle revelation that was made some time ago. Those nasty twinkies!

Koala Bears

Just another random blurb that I probably should not have let escape my mind. What does it mean!

Citric Apocalypse

My one and only recipe.

A Cocoa Puff High

How to feel high as a kite by using nothing but Cocoa Puffs!

Napster Mind Screw #1

An interesting conversation between me and someone downloading music off of me. Where did it all go wrong?

Napster Mind Screw #2

Oh God there's more? Yes there is! This was my second installment of the Napster screwage, I may have tried a little too hard.

Spiritual Rituals

My small list of ultra spiritual rituals. I would like to remind everyone not to believe a thing I say... just don't look at me like I'm a complete freak.