( Kesemua cerita ni adalah hasil dari kiriman email yang diterima dan tidak diketahui siapa penulis asalnya... jadi kepada sesiapa yang nak duit royalti tu... mintak maaf jer lah... roti aku ada laaa... ekekekekekek)
The Rooster Joke
This farmer has about 200 hens, but no rooster, and he wants chicks. So, he goes down the road to the next farmer and asks if he has a rooster that he would sell. The other farmer says, "Yeah, I've got this great rooster, named Kenny. He'll service every chicken you got, no problem." Well, Kenny the rooster costs a lot of money, but the farmer decides he'd be worth it. So, he buys Kenny. The farmer takes Kenny home and sets him down in the barnyard, first, giving the rooster a pep talk. I want you to pace yourself now. You've got a lot of chickens to service here, and you cost me a lot of money. Consequently, I'll need you to do a good job. So, take your time and have some fun," the farmer said, with a chuckle. Kenny seemed to understand, so the farmer pointed toward the Hen house and Kenny took off like a shot. WHAM!- Kenny nails every hen in the hen house - three or four times, and the farmer is really shocked. After that the farmer hears a commotion in the duck pen, sure enough, Kenny is in there. Later, the farmer sees Kenny after a flock of geese, down by the lake. Once again - WHAM! He gets all the geese.
By sunset he sees Kenny out in the fields chasing quail and pheasants. The farmer is distraught and worried that his expensive rooster won't even last 24 hours. Sure enough, the farmer wakens the next morning only to find Kenny on his back, stone cold in the middle of the yard. Buzzards are circling overhead.
The farmer, saddened by the loss of such a colorful and expensive animal, shakes his head and says, "Oh, Kenny, I told you to pace yourself. I tried to get you to slow down, now look what you've done to yourself." Kenny opens one eye, nods toward the buzzards circling in the sky and says, "Shhh, they're getting closer".
Story 24;
This Is The Real Life !!!!
If a barber makes a mistake,It's a new style...
If a driver makes a mistake,It is an accident...
If a doctor makes a mistake,It's an operation...
If a engineer makes a mistake,It is a new venture...
If parents makes a mistake,It is a new generation...
If a politician makes a mistake,It is a new law...
If a scientist makes a mistake,It is a new invention...
If a tailor makes a mistake,It is a new fashion...
If a teacher makes a mistake ,It is a new theory...
If our boss makes a mistake,It is our mistake......
If an employee makes a mistake,It is a "MISTAKE"
Story 25;
My Little Girl's Invoice
My little girl came into the kitchen this evening while I was fixing supper. And he handed me a piece of paper she'd been writing on. So, after wiping my hands on my apron, I read it,and this is what it said:
For mowing the grass, $5.
For making my own bed this week, $1.
For going to the store $.50.
For playing with baby brother while you went shopping, $.25.
For taking out the trash, $1.
For getting a good report card, $5.
And for raking the yard, $2.
Well, I looked at her standing there expectantly, and a thousand memories flashed through my mind. So, I picked up the paper, and turning it over, this is what I wrote:
For the nine months I carried you, growing inside me, No Charge.
For the nights I sat up with you, doctored you prayed for you, No charge.
For the time and the tears, and the cost through the years, No Charge.
For the nights filled with dread, and the worries ahead, No Charge.
For advice and the knowledge, and the cost of your college, No Charge.
For the toys, food and clothes, and for wiping your nose, No Charge.
So, when you add it all up, the full cost of my love is No Charge.
Well, when she finished reading, she had great big tears in his eyes. And she looked up at me and he said, "Mama, I sure do love you." Then she took the pen and in great big letters she wrote:PAID IN FULL.