| Pseudonym: | Zim Zum Impersonator | |
| Real Name: | Michael Linton Impersonator | |
| Age: | Twenty-four | |
| Birthplace: | Hollywood | |
| Instrument: | Guitar(?) | Hobbies: | Meeting fans, gabbing, playing with cats, thinking about cats, talking to fans about cats, talking to cats about fans, mugging for cameras. |
| Quotes: | (To fan) "My cat did the cutest thing today!" | |
| (To cats) "The fans did the cutest thing backstage today!" | ||
| "Whatever you say is fine with me!" | ||
| Influences: | His cats. | |
| Background: | After Daisy Berkowitz Impersonator walked out on the band, M.M.I. was frantic to find a replacement guitarist. Grabbing the first fan to walk by, M.M.I. demanded to know if the unwitting soul could play guitar. The fan, visibly confused, stuttered out what sounded like an affirmative response. "Perfect!", said M.M.I. "You're our new guitarist!" The fan, renamed Zim Zum Impersonator, underwent a baptism of fire over the next few weeks. Though he only had two days to learn the band's entire musical catalogue, he eagerly accepted the challenge, quickly endearing himself both to his new bandmates and fans alike. Throughout Z.Z.I.'s tenure as the guitarist for Marilyn Manson Impersonator's Lonely Hearts Club Band, he consistently brought a radiant glow to every performance, leaving all concert attendants with a warm, fuzzy feeling inside. Despite his disarming manner and the innocent charm he exuded, there seemed to be something lacking from Z.Z.I., though. It took his bandmates nearly a year and a half to pinpoint it, but they finally figured it out: Z.Z.I. could not play the guitar. It wasn't that he played it poorly or occasionally messed up while playing live; he simply didn't play at all. When confronted about it, Z.Z.I. confessed that he had never touched a guitar in his life before being accosted by M.M.I. that first fateful evening. He had been so flustered by M.M.I.'s query that he inadvertantly lied, knowing full well that he had absolutely no musical ability. Prior to that evening, Z.Z.I. had been an introverted young man who worked in the stock room at Hot Topic and lived alone with his four cats (Inky, Blinky, Pinky, and Sue.) His only contact with the outside world was the string of local music shows that he attended. When M.M.I. asked him to join the band, he had seen it as the chance of a lifetime and immediately agreed. The consequent fame and privileges were trivial to Z.Z.I. when compared to his newfound ability to connect with hudreds of people simply due to his position. So, despite his glaringly obvious inability to play the guitar, Z.Z.I. was not completely ejected from Marilyn Manson Impersonator's Lonely Hearts Club Band. The rest of the band took pity on him and decided to allow him to run the fan club, which he does to this day. Though many fans mourn the loss of Z.Z.I. as the band's guitarist, those who actually appreciate music have been more than satisfied with the semi-recent addition of the John 5 Impersonator. Zim Zum Impersonator now lives in an apartment in Canada with his girlfriend, Cassie Klatka. |
Zim Zum Impersonator with an exuberant fan.
Zim Zum Impersonator with the real Zim Zum.
| G.F.I. | M.M.I. | M.W.G.I. | T.R.I. | J.5.I. |
| D.B.I. | G.G.I. | S.L.L.I. | Z.Z.I. |