Jonathan
and Jordan Knight
THE
OPRAH SHOW
March
1, 2001
When Panic Attacks Control
Your Life
Former New Kid on the Block describes the terror that drove him from the stage.
Learn the symptoms and hear the stories of a condition that affects 19 million
Americans.
Former
New Kid On The Block Jonathan Knight describes the terror that drove him from
the stage.
"You get shaky.
Your heart starts pounding."
— Jonathan Knight
Learn the symptoms, hear the
stories, and begin to understand the condition that affects 19 million
Americans.
When panic controls your life.
Jonathan
and Jordan Knight
The former New Kids On The Block members reveal how
Jonathan's
Story
On the outside, New Kids on the Block star Jonathan Knight appeared to have it
all. On the inside, he was struggling to hold himself together. Here, he shares
how panic attacks have controlled his life.
Big
Stardom, Big Problems
"The whole New Kids thing was crazy. The more it grew, the more I felt like
I was trapped. I always had this feeling inside me of being nervous and afraid
of situations."
How
Does a Panic Attack Feel?
"You get shaky. Your heart starts pounding. You get dry mouth. [It's like]
when somebody jumps out at you and screams; adrenaline goes through your
body."
Leaving
The New Kids
At age 23, Jonathan left the band. He moved to a farm in the country and became
a recluse.
"We were in Spain and it just really hit me: This situation is causing me so much stress and so much anxiety. I don't
want to be here. I want to be home. From 1994 to 1997, I did nothing. I
slept and slept and slept. If I was awake, I had to deal with things. To avoid
that, I would stay in bed."
Reaching
Out For Help
"A lot of times, you feel ashamed. You go through the whole thing of 'I'm
weird, I'm strange.' It makes your whole self shrink down even more, and that
makes it worse. It wasn't until 1997 that I realized, 'Something is wrong here.
I have to go talk to a doctor'."
Jordan's
Story
Jonathan wasn't alone with his anxiety problems. Jordan, his younger brother and
lead singer for New Kids on the Block, battled anxiety that almost ended his
singing career.
Under
Pressure
"There was a lot of criticism over whether we were talented. I had to prove
to people that we were really good."
Performance
Anxiety
"During performances, I wanted to run and get out. My heart would be
pounding, my voice would tremble... sometimes it was hard to breathe."
Peace
Through Meditation
"I bought books about how to get over anxiety. Some of the tips were to go
in a meditative state to face your fears. Doing [meditation] daily puts you in
the moment. The best thing to do is to try to be in the moment, to breathe, to
take it all in. I wasn't able to do that before."
A
Family Affair
"I recently learned that my father had panic attacks. I never knew that. It
was through me talking to him about it that I found out it runs in the
family."
Jordan
continues to deal with anxiety, but he has developed the confidence to pursue a
rewarding solo career.
READ WORD FOR WORD TRANSCRIPT OF THE SHOW HERE
