Union of Coca-Cola Supremacy and the Roman Empire

We are a group of people completely devoted to the cause of promoting Coca-Cola (r), the true American soft drink, and ensuring the glorious triumph of Coca-Cola over her enemies. We also take an active part in breaking Pepsi's monopoly in Chugiak and Eagle River. Pepsi is a corrupt company that strains the backs of its workers and consumers. Pepsi practices slanderous, mud-slinging, advertising tactics and survives only by stealing the inventions of Coca-Cola and reselling them. In the Communist Manifesto, Marx prophesizes that a great revolution will occur which will bring power and equality to the proliterate and abolish the tyranny of capitalism forever. Such a revolution shall soon begin, with the soda drinkers of the world declaring in one united voice, "Freedom, liberty, and Coca-Cola!". So rise up workers, unite! You have nothing to lose but your chains! We shall march forth with our legions of Coca-Cola patriots and rule the world! We also believe in the liberation of Northern Ireland and the return of that fine land to the Republic. The Roman Empire is just really cool.

*Coca-Cola is a registered trademark of the Coca-Cola comapny

Union of Coca-Cola Supremacy and the Roman Empire