The Crushes-Who-Are-Too-Old-For-Me

I have a question. but before I ask it, I'd like to lay down first the history/summary of my crushes-who-are-too-old-for-me:

1. Neil Gaiman - the crush of all crushes. Ever since I read the short story Snow, Glass, Apples, I've been an avid fan. And aside from that kick-ass-i-wonder-where-he-gets-his-ideas-from-brain, he's also very very nice person, not to mention very funny--or maybe witty is the better term. Currently in his late forties, married with three children and soooo cute with his british accent and curly hair.

2. Hugh Laurie - he caught my eye when he played Mr. Palmer in Sense and Sensibility. Though he was barely even a supporting character, he was just sooo sarcastic (and don't we just love him sarcastic) and funny and again, british, that it's no wonder I developed a crush on him, especially now with his great character in House M.D. also, he plays the piano. married with three children.

3. Jon Stewart - there are some people whose intelligence is just so obvious and jon stewart is one of those people. his political satiric show "The Daily Show" is just so funny and smart (again, I think witty is the proper term,) I enjoy watching it even when I don't really usually like anything that's related to politics. married with two children.

4. Gary Oldman - loved him in his role as Beethoven (the composer, not the dog) in Immortal, Beloved. And he looks sooo cool in that new cellphone commercial (was it Nokia?) about the world being a stage. He's just got this incredibly beautiful and dreamy speaking voice and he's such a wonderful actor. At 48, he's the oldest of my too-old-for-me crushes. Divorced thrice, with three children. For those of you who don't know him, he plays Sirius Black in the Harry Potter movies.

5. And now for my latest crush. At first I thought he was just uber-cute (gotta love those cheekbones...those collarbones...those abs...those deep deep eyes...) and yes, the most I've seen of him, he was talking with a very true-sounding fake british accent in a deep, deep, spine-tingling voice which more or less bumped him up from just plain old eye-candy level to the british-eye-candy level (where he can't displace Orlando Bloom from the number one spot because, well, technically he's not british and so is therefore in the not-really-british-but-can-pass-off-as-british-eye-candy level)

but then I find out he's got an extremely high IQ. (well, those are so far rumors but nevertheless it bumped him to the not-really-british-but-can-pass-off-as-british-eye-candy-yet-highly-intelligent level)

and then I find out he sings, plays the guitar and writes his own songs. (which bumped him to the not-really-british-but-can-pass-off-as-british-eye-candy-yet-highly-intelligent-can-also-sing level)

And then I find out he's very well read and that he loves shakespeare and the lord of the rings films. (which bumped him to the not-really-british-but-can-pass-off-as-british-eye-candy-yet-highly-intelligent-can-also-sing-and-loves-the-things-i-love level.)

And then, best of all things...he's single! Divorced though (but who isn't divorced or heading for divorce in the biz?) and so...single! So now, I've made a new level for him: the not-really-british-but-can-pass-off-as-british-eye-candy-yet-highly-intelligent-can-also-sing-and-loves-the-things-i-love-and-did-I-mention-he's-hot-and-still-single? level. (not that there's anything I can do about his singleness. it's not as if i can fly to LA and sweep him off his feet...but a girl likes to dream, you know.)

And then I found out, he's 44-years-old. Huwat? Not since I found out Wentworth Miller is in his late 30s was I this surprised (and Wentworth would be in this list too if he was over 40) Honestly...does this look like a 44-year-old man to you?

okay, granted...this was taken just when his Buffy days were ending...which would make him about 39-40 years old. gosh. and I pegged him to be in his late twenties. He's James Marsters, by the way, for those non-Buffy fans. and so now, I reluctanly put him in the crushes-who-are-too-old-for-me level or, in other words, the oh-gosh-won't-he-be-perfect-if-he-just-wasn't-old-enough-to-be-my-father? level.

And so...if it isn't too much to ask...my question is...where have all the real, cute, intelligent, musically-inclined, book-loving, and hopefully british guys in their twenties gone? Where? Where? Where?

Recent Ravings
Music: And you would come across the sea and give me kisses that would speak of the seven lonely oceans. / Who are you to smile and hide at the same time? / I really like your issues./ The way you look at me I can tell what your kiss brings. / You make me want to be bad... "Bad" by James Marsters from his album Civilized Man.
Book: "The Bloody Chamber" by Angela Carter. Beautifully dark fairy tales. Definitely not for the faint-hearted.
TV/Film: Joss Whedon rocks!!! I never really got to appreciate "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" until I watched it from start to finish. It's funny, sad, terrifying, romantic, hot and cool...everything that a show should be. And so is his other TV Series "Firefly," which was unfortunately cut and was so definitely bitin so it's a good thing they continued it in the film "Serenity."

Bittergrace is still bored and jobless on Oct.31.06 at 9:15pm.

This Is Why I Love Neil Gaiman To Death

"You know how it is when you love someone? And the hard part, the bad part, the Jerry Springer Show part is that you never stop loving someone. There's always a piece of them in your heart."
from Bonnie's Mother, a short story within a short story called Strange Little Girls, collected in Fragile Things by Neil Gaiman.

I would post more, but I'm not sure if copyright laws would allow me too. haha.

Recent Ravings
Music: An old fairy tale told me... "The Frog Prince" by Keane from their album Under the Iron Sea.
Book: "Fables" by Bill Willingham. A graphic novel about how characters in Fairy Tales and Fables are coping with living in present day Manhattan after being forced out of their worlds. In issues 1-5, Rose Red, Snow White's sister has gone missing and the only one who can solve the mystery is the Fabletown Sheriff, Mr. Bigby Wolf.
TV/Film: "Grey's Anatomy" House will ever be my favorite but this is amusing enough and with a killer, killer soundtrack.

Bittergrace is still bored and jobless on Oct.16.06 at 7:45am.

Over My Head

Dear Jobstreet,

I stumbled upon a seemingly perfect-for-me job in your website. But how can I apply for said seemingly perfect-for-me job when you constantly cannot find your server?

Tsk. Tsk. Tsk.

Respectfully,
A Bored and Now Only Slightly Jobless Girl

Recent Ravings
Music: I'm losing you and its effortless. "Over My Head (Cable Car)" by The Fray from their album How to Save a Life. Also featured in Grey's Anatomy
Book: "Fragile Things" by Neil Gaiman. Oh wow, I haven't written his name here in a long time. It's the new collection of short stories and poems by my favorite author and famous person in the whole world. I especially love 'Locks' and the Tarot Card stories [forgot the title.]
TV/Film: "Bones" Just finished the first season and can I just say that I love it that David Boreanaz is back on the TV screen. Now all I need is a comeback from Spike [aka James Marsters), Smallville not counted because that was too bittersweet-ingly short.

Bittergrace is still bored and jobless on Oct.08.06 at 6:19pm.

Things To Do While The Lights Are Out

1. Try to read all those books you've bought but haven't read yet (like Susanna Clarke's Jonathan Strange and Mr. Norell.) get bored and stare at the ceiling. start rereading old romance novels instead. read until too dark to read. then light a candle and read again. try not to worry too much about your hair catching flame. give up when you realize that the candle flame is too flickery and trying to read makes you dizzy. stare at the ceiling.
2. Play all the songs you've composed in the piano. when done, play the song you're trying to compose in the piano. finish composing the song. get bored and start pressing random piano keys. browse through the numerous Chopin sheet music you bought in Austria. try to play the ones that look easy. stop trying to play the ones that look easy because you realize that they're really not easy at all. (not to mention that once again, the candlelight is too flickering too much.) try random key bashing again. get bored and reach for your guitar. Play all the songs you know on the guitar. when done, start random string plucking. stop random string plucking when you realize you're not really any good at it and all you're doing is making noise. put down guitar and stare at the ceiling.
3. Stare at the candle flame. wonder how people in the movies put out the candle flame with their fingers. think about possible consequences if you try to put the flame out with your fingers. decide not to try to do it and pour candle wax on your hands instead. Try to make a candle wax sculpture. give up trying to make candle wax sculptures when all you're really doing is making candle wax blobs. get rid of candle wax blobs. stare at the ceiling.
4. Go out. or better yet, go shopping. rejoice when you realize that everything is on sale. Walk into stores you don't normally walk into and try on clothes you have not intention of buying. stop trying on clothes you don't have any intention of buying when you realize you're starting to get allergic reactions. walk into a shoe store you don't normally walk into. gaze longingly at a beautiful leather boot. on impulse, put it on because, for once, it's exactly your size. ask the saleslady to bring you the other pair. put it on. walk around the store and admire how the boots look at your feet. feel a flutter inside when the saleslady comments that they're the last pair. sit down and take boots off. look at the price. rejoice when you see it's 40 percent off. buy them. go home and stare at your beautiful pair of leather boots.
5. Plan out the first chapter of the rewrite of the novel you're always rewriting. stop trying to plan the first chapter when you just can't make up your mind whether to kill so-and-so character now or later and worry whether your surprise plot point is too obvious. stop worrying because worrying makes your head ache. doodle. draw. plan out the lives of your sims characters instead. stop planning out your sims lives because you realize you can never predict if they have boy or girl children. stare at the ceiling.
6. Try to go to sleep, never mind that it's too hot and you're never able to sleep without an electric fan. close your eyes and dream that you're somewhere airconditioned. stop pretending you're elsewhere because pretending never really works. try not to get spooked when you hear various unknown noises from somewhere in the dark, empty house. try to forget about the ghost in the kitchen that your friend swears is there. close your eyes and try not to imagine things that only make you more scared. realize that trying to fall asleep doesn't actually make you fall asleep. stare at the ceiling.
7. rejoice when finally, after four days, the lights come back. jump around. scream. put out all the candles while singing "happy birthday to me..." put on your electric fan, lie down in bed and stare at the ceiling.

Recent Ravings
Music: Sentimental circumstance disguised / As fate with wild romance / Fools me into thinking you're the water for my thirst / Not knowing what you're feeling for me only makes it worse / I don't want to fall in love with the idea of / I don't want to fall in love with love. "I Don't Want to Fall in Love" by Sam Phillips from the album The Indescribable Wow.
Book: The Bridgerton Series by Julia Quinn. includes "The Duke and I," "The Viscount Who Loved Me," "An Offer from a Gentleman," "Romancing Mr. Bridgerton," "To Sir Philip, With Love," "When He Was Wicked," "It's In HIs Kiss," and "On the Way to the Wedding." I think that Julia Quinn is the best Regency Novelist ever. All her books have the right combination of romance, laughter and heartache that you just have to fall in love with her too.
TV/Film: "Gilmore Girls" I especially love it when Luke and Lorelai finally get together. haaay. just want to watch that kiss over and over and over again.

Bittergrace is still bored and jobless on Oct.02.06 at 10:40am.

News!

Fully Booked will open in SM North! and so will Mango. Which means we'll no longer have to travel to Makati to go to our favorite stores. Well, maybe for Rustan's. But an Ayala mall will open someday, right in front of SM North so maybe one day we won't have to go to Makati for Rustan's either.

Angelina Jolie will star as Dagny Taggart in an upcoming film adaptation of Ayn Rand's Atlas Shrugged! she's saying its her dream role (and that she's also an objectivist) and I think she'll pull it off well (except I never saw Dagny as that pretty...) Brad Pitt is in line for John Galt. What is it with him trying to get roles that don't suit him. (Please give up the role of Henry in The Time Traveler's Wife and hand it over to someone else. Preferably Billy Crudup [Stage Beauty]) But then again, he's surprised me in films like Fight Club and 12 Monkeys. And he can look like John Galt, but like Angelina, maybe a little too pretty to remain mysterious (not to mention invisible) throughout 2/3s of the film. No word on who's directing yet. But will probably come out in 2008 (at least the first part, there are plans to make it a trilogy so that the scope of the novel won't be lost. anyway, the book's divided into three parts so making it a trilogy won't compromise anything but will probably make it better. not to mention the suspense.) can't hardly wait. in the meantime, even though I don't have any power over anything, I would just like to say who should play who:

Dagny Taggart - Angelina Jolie. Since she's already cast. But I do think her prettiness might become distracting. But she also has strong masculine qualities so I think it'll work out. Cate Blanchett would be physically perfect (with darker hair, of course) so will Hilary Swank (but somehow she's a bit too macho for me.)
John Galt - Christopher Eccleston. It's a little hard to cast John Galt because he's described as "a face that bore no mark of pain or fear or guilt." Chris can look a bit tortured, but other times, he looks so beautiful...haaay...(am currently lost for words...)
Hank Rearden - Ralph Fiennes. Since he plays intense, tortured souls so well.
Francisco d'Anconia - Johnny Depp. he'll be perfect as an Americanized Latin "Playboy" Aristocrat.
Ragnar Danneskjold - Brad Pitt. He's really pretty and can pass for a Scandinavian. or Josh Holloway from Lost.
Eddie Willers - Christian Bale or John Barrowman [Doctor Who, Torchwood].
James Taggart - Edward Norton. I think he plays bad guys very well and he'll certainly capture the character's whininess well. And I miss seeing Edward Norton on screen.
Ellis Wyatt - Gary Oldman or Hugh Laurie. hay. my crushes-who-are-too-old-for-me. i really just want to see either of them in this film.
Kay Ludlow - Nicole Kidman. Since the role is of the best actress in their world, might as well cast who I think is the best actress in our world. (Though, it's a very small role, more like a cameo.) I can also see Charlize Theron play her.
Mrs. Rearden - Meryl Streep. She clearly knows the best way to play a devil. haha. now all I need is a role to give to Julianne Moore and this film will be perfect.

Recent Ravings
Music: Cryptic words meander / Now there is a song beneath the song / One day you'll learn / You'll soon discern its true meaning / An interesting detachment / A listless poem of love sincere / Desire, despair / Overlapping melodies / And it's not a love, it's not a love / It's not a love, it's not a love song. "Song Beneath the Song" by Maria Taylor from the original soundtrack of Grey's Anatomy.
Book: Since I've been talking about it throughout this post, "Atlas Shrugged" by Ayn Rand. It's a heavy read but it left me breathless at the end. Who is John Galt? Dagny Taggart wants to know. And why is he determined to destroy the Railroad Line her family built?
TV/Film: "The Daily Show with John Stewart" So funny. and so smart. and I think John Stewart is cute. He joins my other crushes-who-are-too-old-for-me.

Bittergrace is still bored and jobless on Sept.22.06 at 4:40pm.

When The Going Gets Boring, The Bored Go Shopping...?!

okay...so those of you who know me know that I absolutely hate shopping. And I don't know what happened between then and now but suddenly, I have the weirdest compulsion to shop. Really, I wake up in the morning, itching to go shopping. And not just for books. But for clothes...yes clothes. And shoes, believe it or not. All of my life, I've never consciously went shopping for my own clothes (not with my very own shopaholic-of-a-sister who happily does it for me.) It's not that I hate fashion. It's just that I hate shopping. I hate the whole process of trying on clothes (well, mainly because somehow, the constant changing of clothes makes me sneeze. don't ask me why, I don't know why.) It seems I'm making up for lost time.

In the meantime, I'm slowly (emphasis on slowly) trying to rewrite firemaster (I know, it must be the nth time but this time, I think I've got it right) and finishing the last poem in my Self-Portraits series which hopefully, will be done in a week so that I can finally submit it...well...somewhere. And Part 2 of my unscandalous adventures in Europe are coming really, really soon. Honestly, I've written half of it already. The link to Part 1 is found in the Archives section. Also look out for The Library, which I'll probably upload to the literary site next month.

Recent Ravings
Music: If only they could see, if only they had been here, they would understand, how someone could have chosen to go the legnth I've gone, to spend just one day riding. Holding on to you. I never thought it would be this clear. "Cayman Islands" from the album Riot on an Empty Street by Kings of Convenience.
Book: "The Time-Traveler's Wife" by Audrey Niffenneger. Beautifully written and heart-breakingly romantic, this is the story of Henry, a man with the genetic [dis]ability to time travel, and his wife Clare, who always waits for him to come home. Soon to be a movie, hopefully not starring Brad Pitt, who is so totally wrong for Henry but so totally right for a supporting character named Gomez. Jen Aniston was supposed to play Clare but that was before the divorce,
TV/Film: "Distraction." Wacky, wild British game show where anything can happen. And I mean anything. like whoever breaks a bottle over his/her opponent's head first gets to answer the question. or whoever pees into the toilet bowl first gets to answer the question. And the host is really witty and irreverent. Don't you just love the British sense of humor?

Bittergrace is still bored and jobless on Sept.12.06 at 11:56am.