April's Stupid Site

Section 331 of the Canadian Criminal Code states that it is illegal to send a telegram or letter threatening a bird.

No one in Canada may watch or listen to an encrypted broadcast which is not licensed by the Canadian government. This means using US satellite systems such as "DirecTV" is illegal.

It is illegal to kill a sick person by frightening them.

It is illegal to pretend to practice witchcraft.

Every fifth song on Canadian radio must be by a Canadian born citizen.

30% of a radio stations content must be "Canadian Content".

You may not pay for a fifty-cent item with only pennies.

Citizens may not publicly remove bandages.

It is illegal for clear or non-dark sodas to contain caffeine.

Alberta

It is illegal for farmers to sell their grain on the open market.

Businesses must provide rails for tying up horses.

Wooden logs may not be painted.

  If you are released from prison, it is required that you are given a handgun with bullets and a horse, so you can ride out of town.

BC

In Steveston (Richmond) it is illegal to ride your horse down Moncton Street after 6pm.

The best place in Canada to be imprisoned - if you're a bankrupt drunk - is B.C. A law there requires jailers to bring convicted debtors a pint of beer on demand

It is illegal to kill a sasquatch.

Balloon animals are not permitted in public in Victoria BC.

Quebec

It is illegal to turn right on a red light at any time. (Repealed with the exception of Montreal)

Margarine producers can't make their margarine yellow.

All business signs in the province of Quebec must be in French. If the business operator wishes to have English on the sign, the French must be at least twice as large as the English is. There are no laws governing the usage of other languages on signs. -Bill 101 (Passed 1976)

No language other than French is permitted to be shown out doors.

City Laws - Beaconsfield

It is considered an offense to have more than two colors of paint on your house.

You may not own a log cabin.

City Laws - Montréal

The Queen Elizabeth Hotel must feed your horse freely when you rent a room. (Repealed 1998)

You may not wash your car in the street.

You may not park a car in such a way that it is blocking your own driveway.

"For Sale" signs are not permitted in the windows of moving vehicles.

Cars parked in public places must be locked, and their windows must be down to less than the width of a hand.

One's rear license plate may not be protected by glass or plastic.

You may not swear in French.

Citizens may not relieve themselves or spit on the street. Punishable by a fine of over 100 Canadian dollars.

City Laws - Outremont

Not only do all exterior painting jobs require a permit (for color) but, for instance, the City went to Appeals Court over the exact type of division inside a window frame.

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