Seinfeld Sounds
Seinfeld Sound Gallery

The sounds are in mp3 format. If you don't have a mp3 player get one here.

Season 2

Lord.mp3 - George:"I just threw away a lifetime of guiltfree sex, and floor seats, for every sporting event in madisson square garden. So please, a little respect, for I am Costanza, Lord of the idiots."

Idiot.mp3 - George:"No one's a bigger idiot than me".

Surgery.mp3 - Kramer warns George about the routine surgery.

Somewhere.mp3 - Jerry :"Well now we're getting somewhere!"

Details.mp3 - "You're not in the mood, well you get in the mood!"

Ego.mp3 - George: "Where are you living? Are you here? Are you on this planet?"

Season 3

Mental.mp3 - George: "I driven women to lesbianism before, but never to a mental institution."

Stella.mp3 - Elaine :"Stella! Stella!"

Society.mp3 - "Look at you, why don't you do something with your life?"

Loveyou.mp3 - Kramer :"I love you, I love you."

Cantstandya.mp3 - George :"Instead of Costenza he said Cantstanya."

Wedgie.mp3 - George :"A grown man, getting a wedgie."

IQ.mp3 - George: "You know, people think I'm smart but I'm not smart."

Badman.mp3 - Babu: "You bad man, you very very bad man!"

Stink2.mp3 - Kramer: "It stinks. Can you smell that? You stink!"

Filmstar.mp3 - Kramer:"wer'e talking to Elaine Benes, adult film star".

Miror.mp3 - Kramer: "Look at what you become, look in the miror, cause you need help."

Pretzels.mp3 - "This pretzels, are making me thirsty!"

Reserv.mp3 - Jerry: "You know how to take the reservation, you just don't know how to hold the reservation."

Insure.mp3 - Jerry needs the insurence.

Scotch.mp3 - Kramer's Scotch commercial.

Breakup.mp3 - George surprises his girlfriend by using the preemptive break up.

Igothand.mp3 - George: "You can't break up with me, I've got hand."

Inlove.mp3 - Kramer thinks Jerry and Elaine are in love with each other.

Spit1.mp3 - Jerry: "Unfortunately the immutable laws of physics contradict the all premise of your account."

Spit2.mp3 - Jerry: "That is one magic loogie."

Latex.mp3 - "I'm gonna hire you as my latex salesman?"

Explorers.mp3 - Jerry and George talk about their favorite explorers.

Looking.mp3 - Jerry: "You shouldn't say "god bless you", you should say "your'e so good looking"."

Cantpark.mp3 -George explaines to Elaine why he cant park in a garage.

Waste.mp3 - Kramer thinks George is wasting his life.

Season 4

Salsa.mp3 - It most be impossible for a spanish man to order salsa.

Nothing.mp3 - George is summing up the show.

Vienna.mp3 - Jerry: "You need a team, a team of psychiatrists working around the clock, thinking about you, having conferences."

Bubble.mp3 - A bubble boy ? Yes, A bubble boy !

Opera.mp3 - Kramer's singing the opera.

Virgin.mp3 - Jerry: "She's a virgin, she just told me." Elaine: "Well I didn't know." Jerry: "Well it's not like spotting a toupee."

Caught.mp3 - George: "My mother caught me."

Contest.mp3 - Kramer wants to join the contest.

Lifestyle.mp3 - "It's easier for a woman not to do it".

Please.mp3 - Kramer: "This is a beautiful woman walking around naked and you wanta tell her to stop ? That's the dumbest thing I've ever heard."

Domain.mp3 - Jerry's finding out if he had won the contest.

Littleman.mp3 - Kramer: "Now what does the little man inside you say?"

Nipple.mp3 - Elaine finds her nipple in a christmess card.

Nipple2.mp3 - Jery sees a little more of Elaine in the card she sent him.

Pick.mp3 - Jerry denies the pick.

Fantasy.mp3 - George: "Kramer goes to a fantasy camp. His all life is a fantasy camp."

Sadjerry.mp3 - Jerry tries to be serious.

Mickey.mp3 - Kramer: "I punched Mickey Mental, my idol. It was eating me up inside".

Youstink.mp3 - "How is this for critisicm, hmm, you stink."

Divorce.mp3 - George talks about divorce.

Cleavage.mp3 - Looking at clevage is like looking at the sun.

Anything.mp3 - Jerry denies being gay. Not that there is anything wrong with that.

Gay.mp3 - Jerry: "We're not gay. Not that there's anything wrong with that."

Imout.mp3 - George is out of the relationship.

Success.mp3 - George: "What kind of a person are you?" Jerry: "I think I'm preety much like you, only successful."

Legman.mp3 - Jerry:"Why would I be a legman? I don't need legs, I have legs."

LA.mp3 - Jerry:"I do kinda wonder what fake breasts feel like." Kramer: "I know what they feel like."

Doubledip.mp3 - "Did you just doubledipped that chip?"

Silicon.mp3 - Elaine claimes Sidra (Terri Hatcher) is a silicon vally.

Spectec.mp3 - Sidra: "They're real and they're spectecular".

Homealone.mp3 - Jerry: "You're crying from Home Alone?"

Fatbaster.mp3 - Jerry agrees to watch the operation.

Mint.mp3 - Well whose gonna turn down a Junior Mint ?

Refreshing.mp3 - It's very refreshing.

Later.mp3 - Kramer tries to find out Mulva's real name.

Doloris.mp3 - Jerry :"Oh, oh, Doloris!"

Lesbian.mp3 - I drive them to lesbianism, he brings them back."

Season 5

Equator.mp3 - George: "I've never realy felt confident in one particular aspect".

Fakes.mp3 - Elaine:"Fake, Fake, Fake Fake".

Fruit.mp3 - Kramer: "It's impossible, they don't have a decent peace of fruit at the supermarket".

Friendship.mp3 - Elaine: "Jerry, We have to have sex to save the friendship."

Hands.mp3 - Kramer is impressed by George's hands.

Pirate.mp3 - Jerry : "But I don't wanta be a pirate".

Pigman.mp3 - Kramer found a pigman in the hospital.

Itsme.mp3 - George: "I invented "it's not you, it's me". Nobody tells me it's them not me."

Info.mp3 - Newman :"When you control the mail, you control information!"

Sogood.mp3 - Jerry : "This is so f---in good !!".

Worst.mp3 - Jerry and George discuss George's "show up" plan.

Massage.mp3 - Kramer talks about the massage he got from Jerry's girlfriend.

Dislike.mp3 - "She just dislikes me so much, it's irresistible."

Indian.mp3 - Vinona: "You mean an Indian giver?" Jerry: "I'm sorry, I'm not familiar with that term."

Dangerous.mp3 - Kramer: "I'm dangerous Jerry, I'm very very dangerous."

Lovehim.mp3 - Kramer: "I think that you're in love with him."

Blew.mp3 - Kramer :"Am Im ? or am I so sane that you just blew your mind."

Cinnamon.mp3 - Jerry talks with Elaine about cinnamon.

Havefun.mp3 - Kramer :"Who wants to have some fun?"

Golf.mp3 - Kramer describes a game of golf on the beach.

Finished.mp3 - George: "I'm telling you right now, if you're kidding around I'm not gonna be able to be your friend anymore."

Biologist.mp3 - George: "At that moment, I was a marine biologist."

Sea.mp3 - George: "The sea was angry that day my friends..."

Tears.mp3 - George: "It was at that moment that I decided to tell her that I was not a marine biologist."

Itout.mp3 - Elaine: "He took it out."

Healthy.mp3 - "Did you ever hear of holding it in?"

Bus1.mp3 - Kramer :"the bus is out of control.

Bus2.mp3 - Kramer tells Jerry and George about his "Speed" experience.

Gottasee.mp3 - Elaine :"you gotta see the baby."

Yoyoma.mp3 - Kramer and jerry's reactions after seeing george's girlfrind topless.

Instinct.mp3 - George: "My life is the complete opposite of everything i want it to be."

Unemploy.mp3 - "My name is George. I'm unemployed and I live with my parents."

Tough.mp3 - George yells at a couple of people in the movie theater.

Whoareu.mp3 - George: "I'm the opposite of every guy you've ever met."

Religion.mp3 - George: "This is no longer just some crazy notion. Elaine, Jerry, this is my religion."

Imgeorge.mp3 - Elaine: "It's true! I'm George! I'm George!"

Season 6

Shame.mp3 - Jerry: "That's a shame."

Bigsalad.mp3 - George: "You know, If it was a regular salad, I wouldn't have said anything. But you had to have the big salad."

Outhere.mp3 - Kramer :"I'm out there Jerry, and I'm lovin every minute of it."

Jungle.mp3 - Jerry: "Knowing you is like going in the jungle. I never know what I'm gonna find next, and I'm real scared."

Notorun.mp3 - Jerry : "I choose not to run."

Meeting.mp3 - George and Jerry meet each other after 20 years.

Meeting2.mp3 - George asks Jerry about his carrer.

Roomate.mp3 - Jerry:"They didn't have roomates in the middle ages."

Theplan.mp3 - Jerry is impressed by George's idea for the switch.

Menage.ra - George's perfect plan for the "switch".

Plutonium.mp3 - George:"This is like discovering plutonium by accident!"

Getdown.mp3 - Do you ever get down on your knees and thank God you know me.

Pain.mp3 - Kramer doesn't want to talk about his childhood.

Buzzer.mp3 - Jerry invites George upstairs.

Imcosmo.mp3 - Kramer decides to become Cosmo.

Switzerland.mp3 - Jerry:"But I don't wanta be Switzerland."

Risk.mp3 - A game of world domination, being played by two guys who can barely run their own lives.

Reguifter.mp3 - Elaine : "He's a reguifter!"

Handsome.mp3 - George doesn't want to admit a man is handsome.

Oldself.mp3 - George feels like his old self after Elaine threw his rug.

Talent.mp3 - Elaine poses as a girlfriend for homosexuals.

Polygraph.mp3 - Jerry is being questioned about watching Melrose Place.

Kisshelo.mp3 - Jerry doesn't see the point to friendly kisses.

Kisshelo2.mp3 - (Maybe if touching breasts is part of it.)

Hooters.mp3 - Kramer :"these were real hooters".

Thebro.mp3 - A bra is for ladies. Meet the Bro.

Chunky.mp3 - Jerry knows the chunky that left those chunkies.

Assman.mp3 - I'm Cosmo Kramer, the AssMan.

Monkey.mp3 - Kramer: "I stopped to look at the monkeys, when all of a sudden, I am hit in the face with a banana peel..."

Feelings.mp3 - Kramer: "What about my feelings? Don't my feelings count for anything?"

Stink.mp3 - Jerry :"I didn't like the show, I didn't like you".

Broadway.mp3 - Kramer shows is loyalty to Bette Midler by yelling on Jerry's girlfriend.

Season 7

Chess.mp3 - George breaks up with his girlfriend when she beats him at chess.

Marriage.mp3 - Jerry tells Kramer about his "pact" with George.

Turnmein.mp3 - Jerry: "Hey Kramer, If I killed somebody, would you turn me in?" Kramer: "Definitely!"

Suffer.mp3 - George: "That's why I'm different. I can sense the slidest human suffering."

Sweeden.mp3 - Kramer: "It's like Sweeden man, Sweeeeeeden!"

Nosoup.mp3 - Soup nazi: "No soup for you".

Adios.mp3 - Soup nazi: "Adios, muchacho!".

Soupnazi.mp3 - Soup nazi: "come back, one year!".

Shmoopie.mp3 - Jerry and his girlfriend calling each other "shmoopie".

Jimb.mp3 - Newman : "Jimbalaya!"

Code.mp3 - Kramer guesses George's secret code.

Collide.mp3 - Kramer: "If Susan comes into contact with this world, his worlds collide."

Worlds.mp3 - George: "Right now I have relationship George, but there is also independent George."

Independent.mp3 - "You're killing independent George!"

Frankmsg.mp3 - Frank:"George is dead, call me back".

Candybar.mp3 - Kramer: "Oh I see. Little Miss. Candy bar paid a visit, didn't she?"

Season 8

Crazytime.mp3 - Jerry and Kramer have problems with their relationship.

Badboy.mp3 - George: "I'm the bad boy. I've never been the bad boy."

Hell.mp3 - Frank :"What the hell does that mean!?"

Piece.mp3 - Frank: "You sain' you want a piece of me?"

Stressed.mp3 - Jerry: "Oh, I'm stressed."

Likeyou.mp3 - George: "Ever since he moved into that apartment he's too much, like you. Kramer: "That's a shame."

Hideous.mp3 - Jerry: "Your teeth are all brown." Kramer: "Look away, I'm, I'm hideous."

Stories.mp3 - George's greatest moments.

Home.mp3 - Jerry wants Newman to go to Hawai.

Convict.mp3 - Geoerge explaines why he enjoyes dating a convict.

Jerryjr.mp3 - Kramer thinks big Jerry hates little Jerry.

Jerk.mp3 - George's reply to "The ocean called, they're running out of shrimps".

Machine.mp3 - George's answering machine in mp3 format.

Dominicans.mp3 - Kramer: "I'm a little worried. When there's no work and the people get restless, who do you think they come after? El Presidente!"

Yada.mp3 - Yada, Yada Yada.

Yada2.mp3 - Elaine has yada yadad sex.

Wattly.mp3 - Wattly tells Jerry jewish jokes.

Phone3.mp3 - Jerry hangs up the phone.

Father.mp3 - Jerry visits the church.

Dentite.mp3 - Kramer thinks Jerry is an anti-dentite.

Nowords.mp3 - "Hey, it's George, I've got nothing to say".

Season 9

Hello1.mp3 - Hellllloooooo.
Hello2.mp3 - Elaine: "Hellllloooooo!"
Hello3.mp3 - Jerry: "Hellllloooooo!"
Hola.mp3 - Jerry: "Hola, Hellllloooooo!"
Lalala.mp3 - Jerry :"La la la".
Serenity.mp3 - Frank: "Serenity Now!".

Newbit.mp3 - Jerry: "But I get upset. I've yelld, you heard me yell." George: "Not realy. Your voice kind of raises to this comidic pitch."

Icare.mp3 - Jerry:"This is horrible, I care".

Iloveu.mp3 -Jerry: "I'm so lucky to have a friend like you George. Ever tell you how much I love you?"

Done.mp3 - Jerry:"Are we finished?" Kramer:"Done!".

Passions.mp3 - George: "Food and sex. Those are my two passions. It's only natural to combine them."
Show.mp3 - Kramer has his own talk-show.

Jiggy.mp3 - Jerry : "I got jiggy wit it !".
Highfive.mp3 - Jerry is annoyed by Puddy's "High five" offers.
Itsme.mp3 - Jerry: "Hi sophie. It's me."

Jackass.mp3 - Jerry : "Solong, jackass !".

Shut.mp3 - Jerry screams at Elaine in the last episode.


Getout.mp3 - Elaine: "Get-Out!".

Giddyup.mp3 - Kramer: "Giddy-Up!".

Hn.mp3 - Jerry: "Hello Newman".


Intro.mid - The famous Seinfeld theme.

Intro2.mid - Another midi version of the show's theme.

Superman.mid - The Superman theme.

Timeof.mid - Time of your life.(from the last episode)

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