Buddy 3/17/96 - 4/18/00

Well, It's been over 2 years since Buddy died and it doesn't hurt any less. I still cry myself to sleep some nights. I'm still crying as I type this.

I always hear people say that it's the little things we miss most...and it's absolutely true. I miss the way Buddy's whole body wagged when he was happy. I miss the way he and Xator played in the mornings. I miss the way he'd rest his head on the bed and stare at me until I'd invite him up. I miss his big, sad, brown eyes. I miss him sleeping under the computer desk and keeping my feet warm while I was online. I miss the way he'd bark at the ceiling fan. There are so many things I miss, but most of all I miss the way his fur felt under my fingers. There's still nothing in world softer than his ears. I'd give anything to touch him one more time.

Buddy was just so incredibly special. I can't begin to find words worthy of describing him. Everyone who met him loved him. He even managed to turn my 'plastic on every piece of furniture - sweeps three times a day' mother into a dog person. She was one of those people that always believed that a dogs place was in a yard, and that they existed solely to protect home and property. Three months after meeting Buddy, she was cooing at him, and even replaced his chair when his old one broke. My mother now shares her home with a kitten, 9 parakeets...and a 7 month old puppy.

I got Buddy before I knew anything about dog lineage, bark yard breeders, and all the things people looking for a dog are supposed to be knowledgeable about. I bought him from a couple that had placed an ad in the paper. Buddy was 8 1/2 months old at the time, and the couple seemed eager to dispose of him. He had a terrible coat - single and sparse instead of the thick double coat typical of a lab [but oh so soft and silky], bad hips, the pedigree of a pet shop (which is, in turn a puppy mill) puppy, and was constantly ailed by one thing or another. I'm almost certain that if Buddy hadn't been taken from me when he was, his background alone would have bought him to an untimely demise. But I'd still give anything to have him back. His temperment was all wrong too...perfect, but all wrong for a lab. He was bouncy and friendly enough with those I accepted, but TRULY protective when I (not he) was uneasy about someone. [Living in NYC it happened more times than I care to remember.] He was so in tune with my emotions. Buddy always knew how to act under all sorts of circumstances. He was so calm and mellow. From visiting the comes of friends and family to long car rides & flights, he took everything in stride.

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Buddy died in my arms at 3:00 in the morning while we were in the Dominican Republic. It had been his second visit to the country. All animal hospitals were closed due to a holiday. A veterinarian friend of the family was on the phone with me throughout most of the ordeal. I had called him several times that evening asking him questions when I noted a change in Buddy's behavior. He was supposed to come early the following morning to look him over...but Buddy didn't make it through the night.

Everything just happened so fast. He was fine all day, then suddenly became more and more lethargic as the evening proggressed. The vet kept assuring me that it was nothing. He said Buddy was probably just a little anemic due to something or other and would be fine, but he would come early the next day to make sure. I finally decided to go to bed at around 1:30am. I turned the lights off and tucked us both in. Just moments later I put my arms around Buddy and my heart dropped when I felt something wet. I immidiately turned the lamp back on and saw the sheets drenched in blood. I called the vet. He asked me to check Buddy's gums (again) and this time they were nearly white. He told me I needed to try to get Buddy hydrated. I ran downstairs and prepared a sugar/water solution he told me to make, grabbed a syringe and tried to get Buddy to drink it. At this point Buddy was too week to swallow. I think that's about when I lost it completely. Shortly after he began to struggle to breathe. Then he just stopped.

The vet thinks he was poisoned. If that was the case, I don't know if it was a malicious act on someone's part (a fairly common practice in Dominican Republic) or if he just got into something without me knowing it. But I just don't see how either could have happened. He spent every waking moment by my side. The suddeness of it all and lack of closure may never allow me to be at peace with Buddy's death.

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*Some Information on Anticoagulant Rodent Poison: Anticoagulant rat and mouse poisons are the most commonly used household poisons. These products account for a large number of accidental poisonings in dogs and cats. Anticoagulants exert their effect by blocking the synthesis of vitamin K, essential for normal clotting. Vitamin K deficiency results in spontaneous bleeding.

*Signs that your pet has ingested Rodent Poison: Observable signs of poinsoning do not occur until several days after exposure. The dog may become weak and pale from blood loss, have nose bleeds, vomit blood, experience rectal bleeding, develop hematomas and bruises beneath the skin or have hemorrhages beneath the gums. The dog may be found dead from bleeding into the chest or abdomen.

*Above info gathered from Dog Owner's Home Veterinary Handbook (A MUST have for dog owners, available at most book stores.) If you EVER suspect your dog has ingested any form of poison, rush to the vet! If possible take the container of poison with you.

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