August 26, 2000

Irony of crime prevention

I call it irony, but i dont know whether it is funny or not. I've seen news stories on TV about how there are cities that held protests and rallies to help stop and prevent crime within these low class, run down ghetto cities. But as i look closer at the people in the protest, i see them wearing expensive ghetto-like cloths (sagging below their knees of course).  These people are the ones who live within that city too.  I mean, i thought this city was poor and full of crime?  But if it is a poor city, then how the hell are these people getting all the expensive goods? Could it be that these people who are protesting are the problems?  I think so...i mean, a welfare check doesnt come with a pair of $96 FUBU pants.

If you listen to the interview, you'll clearly understand what i'm talking about.  These people who are supposely trying to stop crime seems to be the ones who are commiting the crimes and themelves...

interview guy: What kinds of things do you want changed from this city?

ghetto dude (in ghetto voice): uhhhh...yea....i sell..i mean, i be seeing people sellin' drugs and shit all day and it dats hella bad fo the liddle kids cause they be the ones that buy the most.  Yea, i wanna stop the drug selling amd stuff cause people be stealin my...i mean, they be stealin drugs and commiting crimes to buy their drugs...yeah.
 

The idiots with brights

There's always a few idiots out there who just never get it. Is it that hard to fucking turn off their brights when they see another car coming?  I mean, i would forgive him if i knew the dude was getting a massive blow job or something while he's driving, but in most cases that's not the issue so there's really no excuse.  Usually when i see a car approach me with their brights on and no intention to turn it off, i fucking turn mines on too...that'll show the fucking bastard and teach him a thing or two.  I dont care what the drivers handbook tells me.... "look to the far bottom right of you...".  Shit...bottom right my ass.

Japanese food

A few weeks ago, i went out to this Japanese restuarant with one of my brothers. I've never experieced japanese food before and so i thought to myself, "ahh what the hell, how bad can raw fish be?"  Ok, so we sat down at this sushi bar thing and besides from the guy yelling weird japanese words everytime someone enters the door, it was quite pleasant.  Not bad so far, everything looks semi ok. So then we start picking out food.  My brother, having traveled a lot have tried and aquired a taste for these type of foods, he recommended that i try the salmon. Keep in mind that this shit is raw...that means not cooked.  So i picked up the fish with my fingers and dipped it in this soy sauce type sauce with some green paste mixed in it, placed it in my mouth and chewed. Oh god, you dont know how much i wanted to spit that piece of shit out. I choked it down though because i didnt want my brother to feel bad or anything. I'm glad i have a strong stomach.

That was just the fish, i tried a number of different things and for some damn reason all their food have this same distinct smell to it that i just cant stand.  And that green paste that looks like something from your ass is so fucking horrible, i cant explain the feeling, it just goes up your nose and fucking makes me wanna poop in my pant right there. Needless to say, this was my first time eating Japanese food and will be my last.

July 4, 2000

Made in China

How many times have you fired up a nice game of Q3 and have it constantly crash on you even after you brought the clock speed down a bit?  The other day i was planning on enjoying a nice peaceful game but eventually found myself doing everything but enjoying the game because it kept freezing after 2 minutes. This went on for about a half an hour and i finally open my case and discovered that my video card fan has just met up with Death and the heatsink was practically smokin (ok, not really). I looked at the fan and guess what i saw?  "Made in China" What a disgrace.

Getting a parking ticket

Ok, so what if i parked at a meter for 4 and a half hours without paying!  Didnt the cop see the straw that i shoved in the coin slot? It was jammed, how the hell can i put money in there?! You know something?  I think cops are getting paid on commision with the tickets they hand out. Because i dont see cops getting any thinner and i dont see ticket numbers falling and there's always patrol cars parked in front of the donut shop....there's a connection here.

April 14, 2000

Having to piss really bad

Why is it that everytime i play Q3 or something i have to fucking piss hella bad during the most inconvient times. Ok, the score is tied at 19 with the limite set at 20, I'm in the middle of a heated battle and dieing would mean that i lose and losing sucks monkey balls, all of a sudden my bladder decides to be full and starts tell my brain that it needs to empty...then next thing i know, i'm in the middle of 2 battles, go piss, lose the game and suck monkey balls, or dont go piss and risk having bladder problems but win the game.  Though choices, but i always chose the second one...i dont wanna suck no monkey balls.

Damn baggers at Albertson's (is this name gay or what?)

Couple weeks ago i had a sudden craving (guys get these too) for a snickers bar and some doritos.  So i went to my local Albertson's store and was going to stock up for a long day of Quakin'.  I got my stuff and got in line fast hoping to get out as quick as possible, the fat security gaurd was eyeballing me funny. Anyway, at the check out stand, i paid for the stuff and the bagger dude first put my chips in the bag and then this homo literally threw my snickers bar in the bag also, i can even hear my chips crushing and crunching. I looked at the son noova monkey's arse right in the eyes and thought that i'd teach him a thing or two so i said, "...can you double bag that."  I showed his ass...

DVD cases

I recently got The Matrix on DVD for my computer, now the movie is cool and all but what pisses my of is that why the hell are the DVD cases bigger than CD cases even though CDs and DVDs are the same size. This is hella retarded, i can imagine some damn engineers sitting on their arses designing these cases.

Retard engineer 1: Dude, lets make DVD cases bigger than CD cases just to piss people off, espcially webmasters that have no life. 

Retard engineer 2: Whoa, hell yeah.  Then maybe we can get a raise or something and be even more richer than normal people...espeically webmasters that have no life.

Loud computer

It's not so much from the fans that i have in my computer, it's probably the fucking power supply that came with my case. This shit is loud as fuck man, i can even hear my computer from downstairs if i listen closely, and imagine sitting here for hours and hours a day and sleeping with this humming sound on....it's something that can drive a guy crazy.  It almost made me turn gay, almost. I'm not though, i swaer.

March 4, 2000

Magazine insert thingies

I hate these shit! And i dont understand why each magazines gotta have like 20 of these in them...most of em are just subscribtion forms.  I can just imagine that turd who came up with these things:

turd dude: "hmmm, i bet if we stuck little cards in our magazines and annoy the hell out of our readers we can get more money. Let's go ahead and spend 2 million dollars to make these cards so that out of all our readers who throw them away, a whole .5 % of the suckers...errr...readers might even notice what's on them."

CEO dude: "...dude...i've got a better idea, let's put in like 20 of em and better our chances of the suckers...err...readers at seeing em.  It's only 10 million dollars that they'll be throwning away..."

Those kind that fucking falls out of the mags sucks even worst cause then you've gotta pick em up and shit.  What i should do is mail all the card i get in the magazines w/ false addresses and info just to drain their paid postage thing.

Chicks with dangerous breath

Ever spot a girl from across a room or something that just makes your mojo boil and you wanna do some serious shaggin'?  Let me warn you though, better be carful the next time you approch one cause some of em got some serious dental problems or something.  Bad breath is like Mountain Dew man, it'll kill your little swimmers...trust me on this.

A ticking time bomb

A few weeks ago i went backpacking for a weekend and let one of my partners be in charge of the food.  Well, the weekend's food was ok and all except for one meal that we had which was this dehydrated chille with rice pack. If you're not familiar with backpacking dehydrated foods, it's these packs of food that are like freezed dried meals that you just have to add water to.  Most of em beats eating ramen, i'll tell ya that. Anyway, the chilli went down ok, tasted decent....but then, 3-4 hours later i farted out more gas than JoeBob's mom. I kid you not, this farting lasted the whole damn weekend! All though the rest of saturday and sunday, the same smell, horrible. These arent the even those noisy farts that are fun, they were the silent-but-deadly kind that just knocks a person dead...  The smell just stuck itself to my cloths and stayed with me everwhere i went man. Well, al least i wasnt the only one.

I forgot what brand it was, but just never buy dehydrated chilli.  Although, if you ever want to go in an elevator and mess around or something with the people inside it...this is the stuff to get.

January 28, 2000

Japanese Anime crap

Have i talked about this before? Oh well, if i did i'll talk about it again cause these shitty animations just keep popping up everywhere i go. You know, all those Pokemon shit and other stuff that i cant remember the names to.  WTF is up with this?  I can't believe there's crazy homos out that acutually like this, i mean these are just cartoons of asian people except they have blond hair. Oh, and dont get me started on those little Pokemon animals/monsters/furry thingies...or what ever they are.  Everytime i wanna spend some quality time indoors and watch some TV, i flip the channel and see these shit. Their cartoons makes no fucking sense and their mouths dont even move in synch with their voices.  I cant believe the government even allows this crap to be aired here in the US.  If i was president i would probably bomb Japan again just for introducing these shit into this country.

Oh and Japanese anime in video games suck also, no matter how much blood there is in the game.

Having only 4 IDE connectors

Shit this has always sucked. Is it really that hard to add another one or two IDE connectors to motherboards?  I mean, with my 2 HD, DVD and Zip drive i dont have room for anything else. If i wanna use something i'll have sacrafice wither my DVD or Zip drive and connect the other device in and use those, this fucking sucks! I plan on getting another cd-rom and a burner so that mean i'll have to fucking share 4 devices on 2 IDE controllers, what a pain in the ass.  It's always the shitty Japanese imports that screw you up, have you noticed that.

And i thought the Japanese were bad....

Just when things were starting to get better for Indian people...I ran into a 7-11 to get my extra large cherry slurpee and i almost shitted in my tighty-whities as soon as i stepped thought the door.  The Indian dude was playing some damn loud ass Indian music though the whole fucking store. What the hell is the matter with this country, man? As if listening to this crap at home from the damn neighbors accross the street at 8AM every weekend isnt enough. Now they're playing it in 7-11....a family store...a place where young children go to experience their first slupee and a place where teens buy their first pack of condoms....What has this world come to....think about the children!

Is it really necessary to play those....sounds (i dont wanna call it music, i hear no music what so ever) at 10,000 decipals?

 

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