Blackadder Haiku

Contributed by you, the web consumer...
(updated 17 January 2002)
though in sometimes quite non-haiku format. Surplus syllables fly at a fast 'n' furious pace here at Sup's Haiku Hut (where the elite meet to repeat the haiku beat). Hmmmm. Please do feel free to write to some of these insane contributors... that's the price they have to pay for submitting their haiku! And please be patient... I'm training Balders to do HTML, so the page is quite phenomenally slow in its updates!

Death drives the big Push
Sans Edmund who goes "Bibble"
'Nam Vets mutter "Damn!"

Ms Lisette Baxter (

The Black Adder
(not a haiku, but...)
When your world goes dark
And your cold in the park
Just look for me in the "ark"
Beware of the "shark" out to find you
In the heat of the night I'll be there
To watch over you
Don't stay off the track
I put you back on
When your days go black
I'll be back.

A poem By Gon Attar

Lord Percy-Percy
Kisses dungball in a dress
Beware of the germs

Poppie Davie

Boom, boom, boom, boom, boom
Boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom,
Boom, boom, boom, boom, boom

"The German Guns", by Private S. Baldrick
With help from Ulrich Schreitmueller

not the least bit daft
he's slightly queer fore and aft
our dear blackadder

Alexandria the Great (

Think butler Edmund
Ever called Prince George "Mr.
Wooster" by mistake?

Leighanne "Still Afraid of Senor Wencas' Puppets" Mazure

Captain Blackadder
leaps from the trench, guns ablaze.
No cunning plans, alas.

Ted Graham (

Baldrick could be king
If his poor thingy wasn't
shaped like a turnip

The Slug Balancer (

Blackadder's invites
Must be tough, Baldrick helps out
With his little prick

Shawna E. Leonard (

BlackAdders Pretty Cunning
But a Fox of cunningness
Couldn't get him out

Poet Loris (

Queenie and Melchett
Having a small argument
She asks who is queen

Ulrich Schreitmueller (

A plan so cunning
you could put a tail on it
and call it weazel.

Marcel de Vries (

George, the Prince Regent
Thicker than a whale omelet
Says socks are like sex

Tanaquil Furrfoot (

Blackadder is great
Entertainment on TV
A laugh a minute

Stephen Berryman (

Looking in his face
Edmund has a woman's beard
So the captain says

Ulrich Schreitmueller (

daft captain cries out
you have a woman's bottom!
annoys daft queenie

Jeremy Jacobs (

it's amazing how
with each new generation
Baldrick gets dumber

Jeremy Jacobs (

"bastard" was the charge
but Edmund's accusations
quickly turned on him

Jeremy Jacobs (

George is a bit thick
but he'll make it back in time
for tea and medals

Jeremy Jacobs (

Blackadder, my cat,
He is very very fat.
Must be the turnips...

Vivienne (

Baldrick's writing skills
are not very impressive:
"I am a sausage"

Merete Bye (

Baldrick's wildest dream,
a turnip in the country,
costs Blackadder much

Merete Bye (

Being Bean, tis a sham
Lord, I have a cunning plan...
Be Black Adder once again

Annie (

Lord Flasheart, Lord Flasheart
What a man
Hey girls,
Look at my machinery

Lady Filippa Flasheart (

The Pinhead of Wales
Toffey, crappy, Butler weed
Blackadder hurts him

A.N. Actor (

A Haiku poem
about Edmund Blackadder:
He is my hero!

Merete Boeye (

Edmund Blackadder!
What a splendid chap he is!

Merete Boeye (

Second-Rate Percy
Not a Sea-Faring Person
More of a Wet Fish

Sir Anthony Cecil Hogmany Melchett (

Baldrick the turnip
Feel more comfy in a dress?
Smoke a potato?

Jonathan Sweetman (

Captain Kev. Dahling
what a fun evening ahead
Look... the paper clips

Sir Anthony Cecil Hogmany Melchett (

reer reer reer reer reer
baldric the sopwith camel
shut up you moron

Rhythm (

Baldrick, a turnip
All joy found in the garden
Stunning as a hat

Paul Andrews (

My good, manly, friend
Bob. Such jolly boys are we
For rumpy-pumpy

Robert (

Anything is good
In Scarlet Pimpernel sauce
Hurrah, Mrs. M

Count de Fru-fru (

There are amoeba
on Saturn who can cook a
better egg than you Baldrick

Akiro Kurasawa (

I am Blackadder
Inherent trait: problems solved
My line shall sustain

Mark Dallas (

True, Edmund is a bastard.
He is very vile. Hey you
Do not drink the wine

Finvola (

Edmund Blackadder
One Hell of a sneaky guy
Caught in his own trap

Sioux Wolf (

Parapets at night
What fate Edmund's midnight tryst
Dog bites on the neck

Shane Tourtellotte (

Prince Edmund proclaims
Henceforth I shall be known as -
The black... vegetable

Merete (

Hey nonny nonny
Hear the Morris Dancers sing
on saint Leonards day

Merete (

Baldrick and the king
trying to start a fire
with the new Webster

Tesser Rafferty (

Melchett's prized pigeon,
Speckled Jim, thankf'ly tasted
As good as he looked.

Sup (

A Haiku you say!
Aunts Ladies and Gentleman,
And wicked old crows.

Jonathan Horner (

I, little Baldrick
Just a small, little, g-nome
Dirty and Filthy

Joseph Frederick Kille (

Fish float belly up
In the Thames, this evening
Baldric took a swim.

Ryan McNabb (

Edmund, lord of adders black,

Said the witches three
Looks not like Henry Tudor

Finvola (

Dandruff, saliva
Mix it with a spadge of mud
Shaken, not stirred

Bendik Vollebaek

Mr Blackudder
I am Mitch Buchannon, me
Mentally deranged

Mikkel Storm Glomstein (

A frightful menu,
Coffee milky, Rat au Van,
Baldrick cooks sickeningly

Michael A. Marunchak (

Long live the Adder-Black
Who shows us of history
And how it ought to be

WildKard (

Mr. Bean and Black Adder
Are all played by one *great* man

WildKard (

once upon a time
there was a lovely sausage
live ever after

Scott Abbott (

Life filled with dazzling beauties,
immense wealth and servitude
and a good friend with a turnip obession.

Febe Ramirez (

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