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Only In America

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Only in America...can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance...

Only in America...are there handicap parking places in front of a skating rink...

Only in America...do we award someone $3,000,000 for spilling hot coffee in their own lap...

Only in America...do we have labels on baby strollers to remind people to remove the baby before folding up the stroller...

Only in America...do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of  the store to get their prescriptions....

Only in America...do people order double cheese burgers, large fries, and a diet coke...

Only in America...do banks leave all the doors open and then chain the pens to the counters...

Only in America...do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and leave useless junk in the garage...

Only in America...do we use answering machines to screen calls & then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place...

Only in America...do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight...

Only in America...do we use the word "politics" to  describe the process so well: "Poli" in Latin meaning "many" and "tics" meaning "bloodsucking creatures"...

Only in America do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering!

Only in America...does a woman who decides to chop her husbands male body organ off can plead insanity and get away with it...

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