"Cool
Quotes" Archive
Life is a waste of time, time is a
waste of life, so get wasted all of the time and have the time of your life.
The reason husbands and wives do
not understand each other is because they belong to different sexes.
There are a number of mechanical
devices that increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is the
Mercedes- Benz 380SL convertible.
And if you get the chance, get him
right in the family jewels. That little doozy's been a Simpson trademark for generations.
The most wasted day of all is that
on which we have not laughed.
- Sebastien-Roch Nicholas Chamfort
(1741-1794) French writer
Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls. Contrary to what you've just seen, war is neither
glamorous nor fun. There are no winners, only losers. There are no good wars, with the
following exceptions: The American Revolution, World War II, and the Star Wars Trilogy. If
you'd like to learn more about war, there's lots of books in your local library, many of
them with cool, gory pictures.
A woman's appetite is twice that
of a man's; her sexual desire, four times; her intelligence, eight times.
There is no distinctly American
criminal class - except Congress.
I'd rather have a bottle in front
of me, than a frontal lobotomy.
Based on what you know about him
in history books, what do you think Abraham Lincoln would be doing if he were alive today?
1. Writing his memoirs of the Civil War. 2. Advising the President. 3. Desperately clawing
at the inside of his coffin.
Cool
Quotes Archive Index
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