Everybody probably knows by now how gay this school really is, but there's always more to it.  Here are some of the things that will make your experience at Tech truly unique:

• Only at Tech do they cut the grass 3 times a week during the summer and have people blowing leaves left and right every single day. How much does grass grow in 2 days? If these services were cut, your cost of attendance would definitely fall from $21,000 a year to somewhere around $13,358.
   

• RATS - No, I'm not talking about Recently Acquired Tech Students, I'm talking about the real fuckin' deal.  Have you ever seen a Tech rat?  Those bitches are huge...so watch out.  Common warning signs:  Squirrels hop, rats run. If you see something run across your path so fast that all you saw was a blurred black mass, it was a rat, not a squirrel. Also, squirrels eat nuts and do not run up to you and attempt to do something like this to your legs:
  
                             
   

• The Squirrel Mafia - when they're not busy fornicating on the branch of the tree outside your dorm window, they are trying to see how many people they can hit with their chewed up acorn mucus. They actually take bets to see who hits more people.
   

• Picture this: It's 3 am....you're sleeping....and you wake up to the sound of 2 inch plastic wheels grinding on concrete, followed by the imminent thud.  Skateboarders, go to hell.
   

• The people here are just amazing.  Among the coolest are:
          Anybody who jams out to the Star Wars soundtrack.
          Anyone with any shade of blue, green, purple, or pink in their hair.
          Anybody who has facial hair that can be measured in inches.
          People whose favorite color is tie-dye.
   

• Want some ass?  We got ya covered.  Click here.
                                      -Courtesy of the Focker
   

• "Whenever someone brings a girl into a dorm, people magically appear who you've never seen before, but apparently near you."
                                      -lost name of contributor due to the emaaail tragedy
   

• Tech Goggles - Yeah, they put them in that bag you got when you came to FASET.  You're probably wearing them right now.  Worse than beer goggles, Tech goggles bring out the best in the ugliest of the ugly.  They work better and better every year.  You know you've been hit when that girl in your Health class that looked kinda good at the beginning of the semester starts to look "fuckin' hot" after a while.  Tech goggles can change a girl's hair color, make her lose drastic amounts of weight, make her glasses invisible, and change the clothes she is wearing, among other things.  Below are a few examples:
  
   

• After 1 year:
   
   

• After 2 years:
  
   

• 3 years and beyond:
  

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