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What makes me attractive? Just look around guys. Who are the guys with all the chicks, and what do they have that you don't? It may take you long time to realize this, but dating is a skill that those guys have learned. They realized that women instinctively want certain types of guys. So what are the qualities? CONGRUENCE "Just be yourself." OMG, the worst advice EVER! How can you NOT be yourself? I'll tell you that there are going to be many times when you are trying to change yourself to become a better person, and you will come off as incongruent. Don't worry, just try harder to match what you are doing with who you want to be and who you want to be with who you are now. If you want to be confident, and you say a confident line, act self-confident. The best way to get over the periods of incongruency is to believe that you are a different person. This is a powerful method in acting. I once had to act nervous for a play, so I believed that I was nervous, and I almost puked every rehersal and performance - no joke. Other methods include hypnosis and brain washing - I don't suggest those because they are not perpetuating or permanent. Congruence may not be the most important part of getting a girl, but it is hella important. It ties all these other qualities together into a securer character. Once you start acting like a better person, you will start becoming a better person. You will rub off on yourself. "See your lines, be an actor." CONFIDENCE In fact, you might need overconfidence - it's the key ingredient in seduction. Brush off the bad comments, and take in the good comments. Don't rush things, but be relaxed and smooth, like you control time. If you don't think you are going to win, then don't try. Right? WRONG! Be competetive. Make it seem like you are a hot shot, but still be honest and follow through with what you say because liers are unattractive. Girls know that a confident guy is naturally either the biproduct or precursor of success, and success is still sexy... SUCCESS "Success breeds confidence." Oh yes, this is very important especially if you are still a young guy. It may be immature to brag, but you don't need to brag. Tell stories that include things about your honor role, new job, soccer game, or something. Or simply mention your dreams and motives somewhere. A determined guy is much more attractive to women than a guy with no motives. If a girl ever asks what you do, this is the perfect opertunity to explain how your dreams as a kid got you to where you are now on the journey to becoming a successful whatever. [EX: I always liked making things and drawing things, and now that is exactly what I do with CAD - I design stuff. It's awesome when it all makes sense...] Don't make money an issue. Girls want to feel comfortable, and success, to them, means security. TALENT If you have a talent, show that off too. Why do you think guys in a rock band get the good looking girls? Talent is hot. If you can cook, cook; if you can play guitar, play guitar; if you can play pool, play pool; and if you can pick up girls, pick 'em up, dude. And dancing is very hot. Don't waste your talent - it's a chick magnet. I should know - I played bass one time at an open mic and got like three proposals! FUNNY Yeah, there ain't much you can do if your not funny. Hang around some funny people until it rubs off, I guess. Study how comedians get the crowd going. It isn't so much how funny a joke is, but how you funny you present a joke. If a girl who doesn't laugh a lot laughs at your dumb jokes, she probably digs you. Girls are all about feeling, and laughing gives them a good feeling. One very good method of displaying your charisma during humour is to make big motions during their reactions. People that see this, associate you with higher social status. MANLINESS If you got the muscle, let it show, man. Don't wear baggy shirts or pants unless you want to hide something. If you like girls, it might help to check out a few when she is looking at you, or instead make a comment about her sexy style. Don't tell your feelings at first because it's awkward - later it's cute. Find some cologne or aftershave you like and wear a little, not so much that it is repulsive... CLEANLINESS Shave. Wash. Deoderize. And often. You ever wonder why girls squeel when they see a group of guys dressed in suits waiting for them? They don't want slobs! They hate when guys fart, pick their nose, or fix their crotch in public. And bad breath is such a turn off. They would rather kiss a minty mouth than a mouth that tastes like a dead rat. Oh, speaking of dead rat...you might want to clean out your car and make it smell nice too. POLITENESS Hasn't your mother ever told you to mind your manners? They are very important! Everything your mother and father told you about being polite really pays off in the long run. Lay off on the vulgarity when you are around her. Not only do manners show you care, but it also shows social status. The higher your social status is, the more women respect you... DOMINATION Another great way to show your social level is to dominate. Girls want someone they can surrender to. If she ain't digging you, flirt with another girl, ignore her, tease her - once you have her looking up to you, she will want you. You are the master, not the servant - this is your game. If a girl is making fun of you say, "Be nice," or "Respect." Never ever ask a girl what she is doing that night, but instead, tell her when the next meeting is and exactly what you will be doing with or without her. If she can't make it, she'll tell you. If she doesn't want to go, she won't go. She will go if you hold her interest... ADVENTURE Has a girl ever told you that you were random, kinda wierd, or interesting? That's cool if she has because interesting is good. The whole thing with conversation is to keep the other person interested. If the topic has gone on too long, spice it up and do something really random. For instance, if she asks about your job, play around the topic, and tell her you are a gigalo or a part time superhero - catch her off guard...although, don't be a dick and never tell her the story of how your dreams turned into reality. Give her a random hug; make a random comment; sniff her hair; or tell a random story. Use the cliffhanger - tell her you think something is interesting, but don't say what it is. Girls love a spontanious guy, and they love someone who takes risks. INDEPENDENCE It is the opposite of clingy, and girls hate clingy. Be seperate from the rest of the group. Be original and fun. Let her know that you don't need anyone - that you can rule the world all by yourself, thank you very much. A way to show independence that I commonly see is to act like a rebel and look like a rebel. It seems that girls commonly mistake some goths and punks for adventurous, independent guys, when in reality, those guys could be insecure and stupid. ROMANCE What's with all those sappy movies and songs? They like romance, duh. So, when the time is right, give them a little romance. Whisper some romantic things in their ear..."you are so ________." Bring out the candles. Slow dance. Kiss her cheek or neck. Girls love to cuddle. You'll figure it out. Just don't rush the romance - let it build. And if she resists, take the romance away until she re-initiates it or you think the time is right again. This technique of two steps foward, one step back is key in pick up and seduction. LOOKS It helps to be beautiful - you get checked out more. Take care of yourself, and show some style, dude. Long hair or short hair - doesn't matter as long as it looks good. Get a nice accesory; dress a little nicer; find some nice shoes; clean your nails; and get rid of the grease! It will pay off in more ways than one; I can guarantee it. VIRTUE Yes, virtue is sexy. Wierd, huh? What good is it for a girl to get a guy that isn't faithful to her? Even though it seems that a lot of jerks get all the good-looking girls, they don't ever keep them all. Show consistency and honesty, and be trustworthy. Maybe it ain't sexy at first, but it will be in time. CHALLENGING Make her want you. Girls like to chase guys around, and I couldn't figure out why for a long time. It is so simple. What you can't have, you want more. That's why it takes a shy guy so long to get over a girl, and that is why girls go back to their old boyfriends too. So play around, and don't give her all the attention. FRIENDLY The "cute guy" is the guy with a great personality and boyish charm. Girls love to be around him because he is a people person, and people like to be around him because he is honest, friendly, outgoing, etc. People don't scare him and neither do hot girls scare him. For some reason, I got extra attention from a girl that "used to like me" because I had talked to the other guy that got his date on the dance floor the night of the dinner cruise. In the two minutes we talked, I had found out his motives and his style. When she heard that, she said, "That's so cool!" and slapped my knee like fifteen times as we talked. Just goes to show you that studs are social people. They can spark up a conversation with anyone in less than ten seconds. Sometimes it won't matter if you are openly friendly or not, as long as your girl knows that you have a solid group of friends all to yourself. SECURITY Comfort is good. Thus, uncomfort is bad and insecurity sucks. I see relationships go wrong because the man was too jealous, too protective, too possessive, too clingy, too sad, etc.. Just get a grip. Security=comfort. Girls want to feel good. Whatever you do, make sure she feels comfortable with you. PROTECTION This character trait is a mesh of some of the other qualities. I was actually debating whether or not to list this, but under certain circumstances, if you didn't know to be protective, then you would seriously hurt your chances with the girl you choose. This character trait is tricky because you can't have too little or too much. You need to be challenging first, and protective second. Only be protective when there is an actual threat. Overprotection would be jumping to conclusions, and that makes you look insecure. If you aren't protective when she needs you to be, you risk the chance of losing her because you made her realize that you aren't reliable. PRE-SELECTED Enhance yourself by amplifying the qualities above to levels which suit the type of girls you go after. After awhile, you will start attract girls and their female friends. I thought this was strange, but it often happens this way. When you attract one woman, other women notice and atomatically think you are more attractive. Some guys will wear girl's perfume or put a lipstick kiss mark on their neck in order to make it look as if they were with another woman. A good technique to show you are pre-selected is to tell the group with the girl in it a semi-heroic story in which you had a hot ex-girlfriend. You would tell it to the group instead of her because it is the kind of story that if you told it directly to her, it would be considered bragging. Personality is very important to girls, and if you want to apply those qualities, you will need to learn how to use your body language to communicate your amazing personality to all the ladies who want you, but don't know it yet.