What Is Stress?
Stress can be defined as the pressure you feel
when your body reacts to a threat or challenge. Starting a new job, giving a
speech, and taking a test are some things that may cause stress. Balancing work,
relationships, family, and friends can prove to be extremely overwhelming for
some people.
Stress can affect a person’s physical, emotional
or mental health. People who are stressed may have difficulty sleeping, have
high blood pressure or ulcers, feel tired, or suffer with headaches. They may
also feel angry, irritable, have mood swings, be forgetful, or have a difficult
time concentrating. It is important to understand though that not all stress is
bad. Sometimes stress can add to your life, make your life exciting, help you
perform, or give you the physical and mental strength needed to survive a
serious incident. Many people do their best work when they are under stress, and
once the stressful situation is gone, they can appreciate the feelings of
accomplishment and relaxation that will follow.
Without stress, we would not be human. The
important thing to look at is how stress affects you personally, and how you
deal with your stress. Stress does not have to control you, take over, or be a
negative force in your life! You can learn to manage your stress in a
positive way.
One
of the most significant problems human beings face is how to handle stress. You
may not always be able to make stress disappear, but you can manage it with some
very simple techniques.
Talk! Don't hold all your feelings within! Discuss your stressful feelings
with someone you trust who will listen without being judgmental or pressuring
you to their own point of view. Even if you can't change the immediate
situation, talking about it helps alleviate some of the tension you may be
feeling. Supplement the verbalizing with something physical: write it out,
exercise or hit a pillow.
ACT! Be willing to take risk and make change, no matter how small. Try to
change the stressful situation, or at least some part of it. Moving forward in
small ways helps you feel empowered and in control. Put one foot in front of the
other to move in a positive direction. Soon, the stress will lessen.
LISTEN TO YOUR BODY! If you learn about how your body reacts to stress, you
can also learn how to counter that stress. Learn to listen to your body's
signals and find ways to reduce your stress, even if it's just "taking five" to
clear your mind. Relaxation exercises (E.g. Yoga, meditation, physical exercise)
help, too.
BE IN CHARGE! Discover what you need to feel good about yourself and get
your needs met. Another way to reduce your stress is to find an interest, hobby
or activity where you feel in charge and call the shots. If you really feel out
of control, don't stay silent and alone! Seek guidance from someone who is
qualified to help you get through the obstacles, and move forward again. If you
can't find someone qualified in your neighborhood or you don't feel as though
you can talk to someone "in person" try a qualified internet counselor.
DON'T OVERWHELM YOURSELF: If you are stressed and overwhelmed, perhaps you
are trying to handle too much. Rid yourself of extra duties that aren't
necessary or important. Learn how to delegate and how to say "no" without
feeling guilty. Ask for help if you need it.
GET AWAY: Sometimes a change, however small, can do wonders for your spirit.
Forget it all for a while--escape! Go somewhere new for a few hours, or a few
days if you can afford to. If not, it may be helpful just to "get away" to a
warm bath for a little while!
PRIORITIZE: You may not be able to avoid all the responsibilities
obligations you currently have, but you can learn how to complete them without
resentment and consciously choose how you will handle them.
EXTEND YOURSELF: Make your own life better by making someone else's life
better. Give of yourself. Volunteer! You will feel empowered, positive,
important.
Hope, Inc. offers volunteer opportunities for
individuals and groups. Volunteer positions are
available in all of our programs and we offer
training to our Volunteers. However, volunteering at a domestic violence
shelter requires time, empathy and knowledge about
the issue of violence in the home.
If you would like to volunteer but would prefer to check out other volunteer
options, visit
http://www.volunteermatch.com and choose an organization that you feel is
right for you!
MAKE SUCCESS HAPPEN! If you can't change the world, change yourself! Learn
how to love yourself as you are, while you work towards your goals. Then, make a
commitment to yourself to start improving the things about yourself and your
life that (you believe) need it. Instead of immediate, dramatic change, learn to
enjoy the journey of lifelong self-improvement. You are always a work in
progress.
SOCIALIZE: Spend time with family and friends for love and support. Don't be
afraid to enjoy yourself! Appreciate friendship and let others know you care
about them, too. Love may not conquer all, but it's a great start!
LEARN HOW TO BE HAPPY: One thing all of life's winners have in common is a
sense of well-being, a positive attitude, and realistic goals. Focus on the good
things about yourself, and in your life. Nobody's perfect. Learn to enjoy the
"little things" that make you happy. Count your blessings. Every day, write down
on a slip of paper one thing you are grateful for, even if it's just a sunny
day, a friend's phone call, your cat's happy purr. Put this "blessing" in a jar
along with a dollar or more. Do this for one month. At the end of the month read
all those slips of paper and you will realize that life is better than you
think! Use the money to do something really special for yourself, or donate it
to charity.
Negative Ways Some People Deal with Stress
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They use drugs
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They use alcohol
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They smoke
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They become physically or verbally abusive
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They isolate themselves
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They become depressed or suicidal
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They ignore the stressful feelings
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They cry uncontrollably
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They lash out at others (yell, start fights, or
use sarcasm)
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Focused Attention.
You cannot be interrupted during the activity.
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You truly must like
the activity and find it pleasant.
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You can practice it on a
regular basis without undue cost or complicated equipment.
Some Activities that Promote Relaxation are:
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Gardening
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Meditation
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Yoga
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Visualization
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Listening to Music
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Deep breathing
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Swimming
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Tai Chi
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Walking
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Laughter
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Massage
What to Expect from Practicing Relaxation on a Regular Basis
Classes are
Available
Classes and therapists that specialize in relaxation are
available through local community centers, hospitals, adult education programs,
or ask your healthcare provider for a referral. Even before you have a teacher
start taking time-out, practice breathing deeply, and slow down!
What is Involved and How You Can Get Started
There may be an initial cost
to learn the techniques. Once you become trained it will be up to you to set up
a regular practice time each day. Doing this schedule will be good practice for
time management in other parts of your life. Even when you feel you are
progressing and are less reactive to stressful situations you still need to keep
a daily schedule to keep your mind, body, and spirit charged with optimism and
positive thoughts Managing your time more effectively or seeking counseling to
resolve more chronic stress related problems will assist greatly with a
relaxation response on a daily basis.
Learning to take "time-out"
takes practice on this busy world but illness, fatigue, agitation, and
heightened conflict are all less attractive alternatives.
If you feel you are stressed or that you handle
your stress in an unhealthy way, try one or more of the following techniques to
help manage your stress in a more positive way.
Deep Breathing:
Inhale through your nose slowly, counting
silently to five, then exhale through your mouth slowly, counting silently to
five.
Positive Affirmations:
Say positive messages out loud to yourself.
Positive affirmations could include: “Everything will work out”, “I will get a
new job”, “I will pass this test”, “I know I can do it”.
Stretching:
Stretch the area where you feel tension, holding
for about 30 seconds, relax, and repeat 35 times.
Progressive Muscle Relaxation:
Tense a muscle (like making a fist) and hold it
for a slow, silent count of 30 seconds , then release the muscle for a slow,
silent count of 30 seconds.
Visualization:
Find a quiet space, get comfortable, close your eyes, and try to imagine
yourself in a calm, enjoyable, relaxing, tranquil setting. Think about the
details of your tranquil setting. Who is with you? Is it warm? How does the sun
feel? Is there a fragrance in the air? This is a way to take a mini-vacation.
Clearing Your Mind:
Find a quiet space, get comfortable, close your eyes, and begin breathing
deeply. As you do this, focus on one thought or image only. Try this for at
least 10 minutes a day.
Talk To Someone:
Find a friend, family member or best of all, a
counselor to talk to. A counselor can help you with the above techniques,
assist you with managing your time more effectively, help you to express your
fears and concerns, and work with you on building your self esteem and
confidence.
Stressors in Your Life
Go through the following list and ask yourself,
“Does this cause me stress?” If so, you may want to see a counselor to discuss
the best ways for you to handle your stress in a positive way!
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Looking for a job
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Starting a new job
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People at work
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Money problems
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Your children
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Getting a divorce
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Moving to a new home
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The sickness or death of a loved one
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Your siblings
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Your current living conditions
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Your friends
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Your spouse
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Your parents
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Attending social events
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Traffic or commuting
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Meeting new people
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Legal issues
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Giving a speech or presentation