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					waiting by lela kaunitz http://xenafiction.net/scrolls/lela_kaunitz_w.hts SYNOPSIS: UberGabrielle and UberXena meet for a drink. Sort of. NANCY: More like "almost". EWOK: Well, this is the kind of romantic, life-affirming sweetness we've come to expect from uberfiction, isn't it? The disclaimer recommends "mature readers", and perhaps - as a mere sidekick - I don't fit into this category but ... *snicker* It looks like the bard got bored halfway in, chopped off a few loose ends with all the finesse of Gabrielle making sushi with a chakram, and came up with this. NANCY: Well, I happen to like sushi, and as for tying off loose ends, at least she BOTHERS! I found this story to be really sharp (like most of this bard's writing), and it doesn't fall into those goddamn boring "we're-going-to-have-the-best-sex-in-the-universe-right-now-even-though-we-just-met" traps! EWOK: Who are you to begrudge them good sex? NANCY: Every goddamn time? I mean, sooner or later somebody has to be just not in the mood, don't they? Now I like this story, blacker than black with a touch of ironic humour. Ahhhhh. That hits the spot. And it doesn't run for 100 plus pages so it's like a short, gasping breath of fresh air. EWOK: An excessive fondness for adjectives, not to mention a bad habit of leaving vital pieces of sentences OUT, seems to be characteristic of Lela's style. My grammar checker was going berserk with "fragment" warnings. NANCY: Ewok, the last time I checked, this was fiction, not some goddamn doctoral thesis. You could put Lord of the Rings through your grammar checker and it would go berserk. Besides, I bet your grammar checker is in Word, right? Its grammar checker goes off when you run a check through its own HELP file! So please, spare me. EWOK: I happen to put these reviews through the Word grammar checker, thanks Nancy, and they come up just fine. Someone was in need of a good editor, methinks. NANCY: NO spelling errors, MINIMAL grammar problems (despite your obviously schizophrenic grammar checker) and a tightly woven, fast hitting storyline. You are damn well hard to please. EWOK: Nancy, why the hell did you put this in your top five? NANCY: Because I CAN. EWOK: 6 out of 10, since someone's drinking bourbon. Yummo. NANCY: Fans of Conqueror stories should love this - picture making Evil-Xena wait for anything and transfer the same viciousness over to an Uber Gabby character. My senses are still ringing from imagining her eyes. 9 big ones, count them Ewok, *9*! EWOK: I can count. Who did your taxes this year?