Send email to:  TastyJoyRecords@popstar.com or visit this year's email at this year's "I'd like to add..." page.

Message Board 2000:
Want to see more messages? Select a year:	2000. 2001. 2002.
12/23/00 Greg, a Former Guest, Nashville, TN.	Hi. Just wanted to say Merry Christmas to you and yours and have a safe, happy, and warm holiday season. Sincerely, Greg LCR©: Right back at ya!
12/21/00 Michael R., Former Guest Clifton, Cincinnati, OH.	While shopping at the local Target just two days ago I noticed a rather familiar looking chunky filipino guy. At first I thought maybe it's the tennis shoes and the warm-up suit on a filipino, just in general, that seemed so familiar. But upon close inspection of his surgically scarred ears, I concluded that this was in fact the legendary Zykie. He responded to my gaze with a "who are you? look" and I walked away. Has any one else had a close encounter? Could the kind folks at TJRC and LCR forward this and wish the old Guests appropriate holiday tidings on this day of the solstice? LCR©: Yeah, whatever. Your interest in the past is interesting in a clinical sort of way. Tell you what--you see a doctor and we'll forward your message.
12/17/00 Bob M., Former Guest Knoxville, TN.	Bob and Pam have added a girl to their line up, as Mary Grace Mader was born on December 15th. I may have to alter my plans of having a boy band and maybe go for the Knoxville Sound Machine featuring Mary Grace. Just a thought. LCR©: Or, you could follow the wholesome example of the Osmonds. Have a boy band until daughter is old enough to have a variety show with her second-youngest-or-so brother. Just be aware of the LaToya syndrome while the cure is still prophylaxis.
9/28/00 Chris, a Former Guest, Norwood, OH.	Thank you for your response regarding old TUG lyrics, and YVONNE YVONNE in particular. I checked out the LYRICS server, and of course there are no TUG lyrics there. I guess TUG is just too non-mainstream (i.e. Avant Garde.) Perhaps you will consider a lyrics section to the TUG website. Might I also request that you include lyrics to songs that never got finished, for example, Larry wrote some words that were real cutting edge for the early 80's, a song he calls "My Rock Collection". Please post "Rock Collection" by Larry. It's Deep. Also good were Bob's words to a song called "Life Is A Puzzle" : Life Is A Puzzle/And I'm Doin' The Edges First. And who could forget "Zoom". Looking forward to the upcoming Lyrics portion of the site. LCR©: When the Tasty Joy© webmaster forwarded your message to us at Love Chocolate Records© some one blurted out "Does he think we pay tribute to this band for a living?" The point being that we don't do this for a living. You do something nice, build a little tribute, and all you get are comments like "build a tribute to me too," "put up more pictures of me," and "write more about me." We really have no time to sit around typing out those old lyrics, however amusing they may very well be. Volunteer some time and maybe we can work something out.
9/26/00 Chris, a Former Guest, Norwood, OH.	GIRLS too? Outasite! LCR©: Word on the street is only the finest LADIES will be there. Don't stop keepin' it real man!
9/25/00 Mikey W. , Former Guest, New York, NY	I think for the 2004 "Up Where We Belong" Conference (what the hell), we should locate and invite past TUG fans, so TUGers how 'bout it? Names, email addresses, phone numbers. Let's make this a real TUG Summit. LCR©: The Tasty Joy© mainframe has recently been upgraded to accommodate mass emailing. While before maybe a dozen messages could have been sent simultaneously, now we are ready to push the two dozen envelope. We are committed to making "Up Where We Belong 2004" as much of a success as possible.
9/6/00 Susan, witness NY, NY	You see what happens when a person doesn't drink and has too much time on their hands? VERY thorough, however, and VERY funny. How I fondly remember those Tuesdays at the Plaza where Mikey and I were the only ones who drank the free TUG supply of Hudy! I have some old flyers if you want them to put on the site - including, I think, the one where some high school fans around 1987-88 made their own "Chicken From Hell" picture by tracing their hand-- kindergarten-thanksgiving turkey-style. My vote for the best band name: Steve! U.K. LCR©: All the old-timers at Love Chocolate Records© would love to see the flyers. The "Chicken From Hell" flyers were thought lost or destroyed long ago. Thank you for your vigilance in preserving our Uninvited history.
9/5/00 Chris, a Former Guest, Norwood, OH.	Here is Doc's new email address. Send him lots of porn, and pictures of rock singers from the '80s. Doc really likes Duran Duran, Human League and Trevor Horn from The Buggles: pacingcage@hotmail.com LCR©: Neither The Tasty Joy Recording Company© nor Love Chocolate Records© condone Chris's casual attitude toward pornography and spam. We do, however, encourage you to keep in touch.
8/29/00 Chris, a Former Guest, Norwood, OH.	Have you considered posting the lyrics to YVONNE YVONNE on the website? You know, Dylan's website, The Doors website, all the great rock poets, their websites all have lyrics posted and, well, the words to YVONNE YVONNE are some of Michael's best. Please consider doing this, not for Michael, and not for the band, but FOR THE PEOPLE. Also, some people are having trouble with the French. LCR©: No, we haven't considered posting the lyrics. You might, however, check the lyric server to see if they are posted there.
8/28/00 Michael R., Former Guest, Clifton, Cincinnati	I was just taking a look at the tribute site and I just wanted to say thanks for adding the memorial. By the way, I thought the newest mainframe technology used human fetal tissue to clone disembodied super-brains. LCR©: The memorial is just a small thing. Thanks for looking. About the mainframe, we've said all we are allowed to say.
8/23/00 Mikey W. , Former Guest, New York, NY	What's a mainframe? LCR©: For all the non-techies out there, a mainframe is the cutting edge of "computer technology." Mainframes tend to be very large, often filling entire rooms and needing vast amounts of "electricity" to cool the huge collection of glowing red-hot "vacuum tubes" that constitute the computer's "brain". These mainframes can perform complicated mathematical calculations involving numbers even as large as a thousand. Futurists have speculated that someday humans may be enhanced with the implantation of several of these "vacuum tubes" directly into the body. This dream awaits only the invention of a small, implantable nuclear device, the "heart," if you will, (or is it the "stomach?") to power this enhanced human hybrid of the future.
8/23/00 Bob M., Former Guest Knoxville, TN.	What's a Gooch? Just an update... 3 year old Solomon's new favorite song is "Yamaica" by T.U.G. 5 year old Devanta's new favorite song is the new AM radio friendly version of "Nuclear Summer" which includes the new lyrics "Oh my GOSH it must be a freak" and "My surfboard's on fire, boy does that STINK." He is always pleading to hear the mystery song after "Hearts and Roses" on the TUG "Paprika" LP. Hopefully by the time the 2004 TUG reunion roles around, my boys will have formed their own boy band (tentatively named 'The N*tug Boys on the Block featuring Gootch as Grandpa Gootch). THIS JUST IN!!! ... The Uninvited Guests no longer qualify for the Lightest Band in the world. Seems Mikey has been eating the Lucky Charms instead of casting them to the masses. So are we going to sue Napster the first time one of our songs is traded? 10 days 'til kick off...GO VOLS!(for you Chris) LCR©: We understand why AM radio has no room for God but replacing a perfectly good English word with "stink" is going too far! This country is going to heck! Who the F-U-double-toothpicks decided this? Concerning "What is a Gooch?," Check out links to other obscure Gooches: Gooch 1, Gooch 2, Gooch 3, Gooch 4, and Gooch 5.
8/22/00 Dave L., Former Guest Lindenwald, Hamilton!, OH.	Didn't someone pirate that Brian Brain show where TUG & BB collaborated on Space Age Clambake? No, wait, pirate night was another gig altogether. LCR©: If anyone did happen to record the show, we'd like to know about it. Love Chocolate Records© believes that protecting property rights promotes the highest possible good in any society. Only with these protections can free enterprise flourish. Anyway, let us know if anyone claims to have it so we can start legal proceedings against them as soon as possible. Keep in mind, the threat of litigation prevents America from getting fat and lazy!
8/17/00 Bob M., Former Guest Knoxville, TN.	Napster vs TUG: Ive heard T.U.G. songs are some of the hottest MP3's being traded on Napster. Are we losing money here? Oh wait... I made that up. But I do have a nifty mp3 of Hearts and Roses if you want to post it on the site. LCR©: When Tasty Joy Radio© is functioning we'll put that up along with Space Age Clambake. Space Age Clambake is reported to be one of the most requsted titles in Napster but, at least up to now, no one has been able to find it. At Love Chocolate Records© we always say "give the people what they want, even if we don't understand what that thing they seem to want is."
8/15/00 Mike B.(now C.B.), Former Guest Price Hill, Cincinnati, OH.	This is frightening. LCR©: You bet!
7/21/00 Dave L., Former Guest Lindenwald, Hamilton!, OH.	I still like "Steve! UK." LCR©: Is that your final answer? Would you really put Steve! UK above Chris Comer's Official Uninvited Guest All-Star Revival Featuring Chris Comer as "The Gooch"?
7/14/00 Mike B.(now C.B.), Former Guest Price Hill, Cincinnati, OH.	I seem to remember the Guests stealing a page from the Young Ones [Britcom] and considering becoming the Hurdy Gurdy Mushroom Men. Was this merely a toxin-induced pseudomemory I developed whilst shacking with a groupie, or is it true? LCR©: Keep in mind, in the mid- to late-80s the Uninvited Guests were in the forefront of radical experimentation in mind expansion. This type of experimentation was in vogue for a few blissfully innocent years and has since fallen out of fashion. Coffee binges, sugar highs, and sleep deprivation all took their toll and scarred some former TUGers. Bob, for instance, spent time in detox to kick his dangerous addiction to caffeine and Canada mints. To this day, it is rumored, he cannot drink soda-pop. But who could resist the temptation of the pepto-bismol-like confection known as the Canada mint? The Hurdy Gurdy Mushroom Men would most probably have taken hold as TUG's new moniker had the sugar-caffeine delirium taken a permanent hold.
6/14/00 Rusty Somewhere in New Jersey	I remember seeing TUG once in the early days when they were still playing wedding gigs (Gressler-Rose). What an impact they made. "Surfin' the Dead Sea" was second only to the service itself in moving the congregation. The impact is still felt today -- what other contemporaries have their own websites? Scimitar? Armageddon? The Six Pack of Jazz? -- I don't think so! Rusty, Recovering TUG fan LCR©: Do you think Scimitar, Armageddon, or Six Pack of Jazz should have tribute web sites? Do you think they should have tribute sites before Quest has a tribute web site? We promise to link up if you find an official site for any of these. If you can only find sites run by fans, we promise to consider linking up.
5/23/00 Former Fan Whereabouts unknown.	I am a former fan of TUG. .. well, but really mainly because I was dragged to every performance because my friend's boyfriend was in the band .... oh anyway ... loved the website, what a masterpiece ... What hair some of you guys (Bob) used to have WOW! Wonder what Redmath looks like now? LCR©: It has been rumored that what appears to have been Bob's hair was really an expensive wig. If this rumor is true, it was apparently money well spent.
5/23/00 Bob, Former Guest, Knoxville, TN.	For a very short period of time the band agreed on the name DVI which they drew from a hat as the new band name. DVI of course stood for Deep Vaginal Itch, and it took the boys a good hour or so to realize they couldn't tell their mom's the name of the band, or they would be kicked out of the basement. Another name that was in the hat however was "Sulu Loves Spock" which went on to gain more notoriety then the aforementioned DVI. The name DVI was never copyrighted so don't be surprised to see "Gooch and the DVI" at your local pub. LCR©: It's a good thing the band did not use the moniker DVI. It has come to the attention of Love Chocolate Records© that there is a over-the-counter medication, at the time advertising on television, that would have eradicated the band. Call it luck or call it fate. By the way, we updated the 3/22/00 list below.
5/16/00 "Ray", Millville, OH.	Hello TUG Web site: Although I loved TUG I never knew TUG. Here's a little story: One summer evening, I was in the Fairfield Taco Bell and saw a young man in his pajamas who I was later told was a Guest. This was my own personal brush with greatness. Seeing a member of TUG in Taco Bell and meeting Joe Nuxhall at his batting cages, Wow! Who says Butler County doesn't have stars. Side note: What ever happened to Zantigo? I remember liking their food much more than Taco Bell. Regardless, much to my chagrin, I was fortunate enough to see the mighty TUG play only one time, but it was an eye-opening experience, like trying rush for the first time or even fingernail polish remover but without the headache. Here's the scene: It was a battle of the bands night put on by the generous and charitable souls at Bogart's. TUG featured an unkempt man with dirty, bare feet throwing cereal to the crowd. I immediately recognized this figure as a Christ-like person casting bread (cereal) upon the water (crowd). Although as the night wore on, most in the crowd wished a troop of bloodthirsty Romans would come nail this man's hide to a tree, I was enchanted. The band also featured unintelligible vocals and a muddy sound. Remember, this was at Bogart's. The bass player was a whip thin wisp of a lad dwarfed by his Fender Precision, while the guitarist was manic, crazed and brilliant as he wrestled every sound from a baby coo to a machine gun burst out of his rig. The drummer, who showed all night he understood just what the hell rock-n-roll was all about by keeping the groove flowing and the hearts thumping, ended the night by coming to the front of the stage and insulting Bogart's after the club cut the PA in the middle of a song. Well done boys! The band did not advance in the battle of the bands. Mostly because the audience was stuck in the '80s while TUG was timeless. Although I took only one ride on the TUG train, my ticket is still punched. You may post this on your web site if you are so desperate. LCR©: Thank you for your kind validation. We'd like to encourage our fans to check out http://www.cincinnatlas.com/chrisandrob/.
5/13/00 Jim, New Orleans, LA.	Dear T.U.G., I remember well the Bogart's show in the mid-80s - I was one of the 50 or so people in attendance. One of the defining moments of my late-adolescent period was watching the guests perform "Chicken From Hell" and thinking, "If they can do this in public, then I can accomplish anything." I am now a successful physician in New Orleans and without Larry and the rest of the Uninvited Guests I don't think any of that would have happened. Thanks! LCR©: We are glad the music of The Uninvited Guests had such a profound and lasting effect on you. This is one of the major reasons why Tasty Joy Records© and Love Chocolate Records© have started searching pizza restaurants across the entire southwestern portion of Ohio in search of the cast for The Uninvited Guests: The Next Generation. During the summers T.U.G.T.N.G will be the house band at an Uninvited Guest boot camp in Hamilton, Ohio (still being planned) and during the winters tour southwestern Ohio's many facilities for disturbed youth.
5/12/00 Larry, Former Guest, Glendale, OH.	I believe we missed "Gengis Generic and the Day Old Breads" as one of the many "original" band names. LCR©: We seem to recall a lyric from Gengis Generic as well: "There she goes walking away from me in her 1957 Chevy." By the way, we added this to the list below.
5/10/00 Dave L, Former Guest Lindenwald, Hamilton!, OH.	From the "'Scuse me while I kiss this guy file." Often misinterpreted lyrics: "Late night in the engine room, they're passing the meat" [Sulu loves Spock] and "I labor in my leisure suit" [The Yellow Rose]. LCR©: So those weren't really the lyrics? Are you sure?
5/8/00 Michael R., Former Guest Clifton, Cincinnati, OH.	Hey, I just wanted to say thanks for making it sound like I could neither play nor tune the guitar. LCR©: And could you play or tune the guitar? We've heard the tapes. Just keep practicing!
5/6/00 Greg, a Former Guest, Nashville, TN.	Remember Doug saying "man, that's red"? LCR©: Do you remember when Mike C. called to pick up his Big Muff in Zykie's basement and Bob told him Doug had been using it as an ashtray? Mike C. replied "Heh heh heh heh heh heh. No really, where's my Big Muff?"
5/6/00 Greg, a Former Guest, Nashville, TN.	I know I have some things to add like great live pictures from Bogart's with the rubber chicken (what was his name, Clarence maybe?) and maybe a basement rehearsal tape or "Chicken..." being written and performed for the very first time! It seems I remember hearing myself laughing into the mic while trying to do the chicken noises with my talkbox. I remember that little kid telling me his friend or whomever had a six foot Peavey amp because I had my really big Peavey Musician Mark IV at that gig (was it for troubled kids or something, in a school gym?) and it was fairly large; piggy back head and big 4 x 12 cab. When I run across this stuff I'll contact you. LCR©: The chicken's name was "Clemmons" and he went "bok-bok." Wasn't Larry late for the Blanchester Children's Home gig because he had been detained by the police? And wasn't "Chicken From Hell" sometimes performed as "Chicken From Blanchester" and "Chicken From Blue Ball(?)," after a small town in south eastern Indiana, shortly thereafter? LCR© needs to know these things! Drop us a line!
5/1/00 Friend of Chris, Cincinnati, OH.	I was looking at SuperStats for Marvel and found that someone got to the site from here. http://www.oocities.org/tastyjoy/tug/tug_1999.html The pics of Gooch are scary. What the hell is it? LCR©: It is what it is. Nothing more but often less.
4/26/00 Chris, a Former Guest, Norwood, OH.	Nice tribute website to the seminal Uninvited Guests, however one oversight must be noted. It is clear from historical documentation that "Chris" had a much more profound influence on the band than is currently reflected on the site. Of particular note, notice his picture is NOT included on the MEET TUG '83-'89 section despite the fact he was the most important and popular (except for Larry) member of the group from the standpoint of musicianship, attitude, creativity, marketing, public relations, artistic vision, charm and boyish good looks. There is no mention of Chris' superior musical and artistic direction, which was limited only by his own imagination. For example, Chris' attempt to score a string quartet arrangement for "The Velvet Shine", or his atonal free-jazz free-meter approach to "Revolt Of The Foolish Molar" where he pushed the other members' musical concepts to their limits. Also no mention of Chris' skill as business manager is made. Credit is given to Zykie for booking shows at insane asylums while no mention is given of Chris' success at booking not one but two big shows at one of Cincinnati's largest venues, BOGART'S as well as the band's first major public performance at Cincinnati Convention Center. Also overlooked is the jealousy harbored by all the other band members towards Chris (except for maybe Larry who never cared much anyway). With all the condescending spite and jealousy directed towards him, Chris should be applauded for his strength and courage as well as his superior talents. One suggestion to rectify this gross oversight might be to post a section of the site specifically in tribute to and thanking Chris for his dedication, his blood, sweat and tears, and his unswerving dedication to lift the rest of the Guests out of the vile New Wave muck they had been wallowing in before he arrived upon the scene to bring credibility to the group. LCR©: This was a gross oversight on our part. Steps are being taken to rectify this injustice. A bronze bust of Chris has been commissioned and will be installed in the Tasty Joy Recording Company's© world headquarters. It promises to be a near lifelike image which has been specially designed with thousands of pinholes which will slowly emit running water to capture Chris' trademark perspiration.
3/25/00 Fan, Hamilton!, OH.	I'm a single lady and I'd like a man to help me raise my baby. Could I have Chris' phone number? Traci LCR©: We'll try to hook you up. Would you describe yourself as "avant-garde"?
3/22/00 Unidentified Fan, Cincinnati, OH.	Have I ever seen your band? Weren't you Carload of Sheep at one time? LCR©: No, but The Uninvited Guests did play a gig with Carload of Sheep. The Uninvited Guests played under the following names: 1) The Quarryguys, 2) The Silver Uninvited Guests, 3) The Guitar Guy Band, 4) Gengis Generic and the Day Old Bread Band, 5) DVI, 6) The Uninvited Guests, 7) Those Zany Nixons, 8) Modo de Memoria, 9) MdM, 10) The All-New Uninvited Guests, 11) Steve! U.K., 12) TUG, 13) The Jelly Babies, 14) Love Chocolate, 15) The Uninvited Guest All-Stars, 16) Chris Comer's Official Uninvited Guest Band, and 17) Chris Comer's Official Uninvited Guest All-Star Revival Featuring Chris Comer as "The Gooch," but not in that order. Sound familiar? Did I forget one? Former members of the Uninvited Guests have appeared in the following projects: 1) Umclunk (Chris "the Gooch"), 2) The Marvel Bornamens (Chris "the Gooch"), 3) The Brady Seals (Greg), 4) The Aesthetics (Chris "the Gooch"), 5) Prostitution (Chris "the Gooch," Doc, Michael R.), 6) Quest (Larry), 7) The Damn Yankee's Orchestra (Chris "the Gooch"), 8) The Monkey Biscuits (Dave L.) 9) Sarcoptic Mange (Mike B.), 11) The Clete Frances Band (Mike B.), 12) The Bees (Mike B.) and too many more to mention. Do know of more that should be mentioned here?
3/21/00 Mike W., Former Guest, New York, NY	Great job on the discography, that must've taken you days. Do you think it was worth it? LCR©: Worth it? What are you talking about? Of course it wasn't worth it.
	In early 2000 this whole mess started when The Uninvited Guests' tribute site went public with the following message:
	Dear dlenehan@cincinnatiequitable.com, my3kidzdad@aol.com, mikew@jup.com, christianbudd@fuse.net, rosemi@nku.edu, geograph@eos.net, CornPhedd@aol.com, and ThePup66@aol.com, Who was your favorite band in high school? If you were like most normal people, your favorite band was certainly the Uninvited Guests. Yes, it has been a long time since we've heard the happy techno sounds of the Uninvited Guests but you can relive those days again on the World Wide Web -- for FREE! That's right. No Credit Card or subscription needed. Maybe you can't relive your first date or your first kiss but you can relive the first time you ever heard the Uninvited Guests! Loads of fun from the early days of the "Quarryguys" to recent incarnations such as "Chris Comer's Official Uninvited Guest All-Star Revival Band Featuring Chris Comer as 'The Gooch.'" Please stop by and visit the Uninvited Guests online at: http://www.oocities.org/tastyjoy/tug Relive memories such as "The Big Muff incident," "Chris' Jammin' Cap," "Music Palace talent hunts," "Male Fantasy Night," and "T.U.G. Convention '99 Mayhem." It's all there and much, much less! Do it for yourself! Make today a tasty day! This is a form letter generated by the mainframe computer at the Tasty Joy Recording Company© world headquarters. The Tasty Joy Recording Company© New York | Chicago | Cincinnati