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The Road To Life (or to work) Classic Bumper Stickers |
- 100,000 sperm and YOU were the fastest?
- A cubicle is just a padded cell without a door.
- A hard on doesn't count as personal growth.
- All men are animals, some just make better pets.
- Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else.
- And which dwarf are you?
- Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.
- Boldly going nowhere.
- Cat. The other white meat.
- Caution: Driver just doesn't give a shit anymore.
- Confused as a baby in a strip club
- Consciousness: that annoying time between naps.
- Constipated people don't give a crap.
- Cover Me, I'm Changing Lanes.
- Did the aliens forget to remove your anal probe?
- Do they ever shut up on your planet?
- Don't bother me. I'm living happily ever after.
- Don't like my driving? Then quit watching me.
- Don't piss me off! I'm running out of places to hide the bodies.
- Dont Steal! The government doesn't like competition
- Don't take life too seriously, you won't get out alive.
- Earth is full. Go home.
- Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?
- Everyone has a photographic memory, some just don't have film.
- Fight Crime: Shoot Back!
- For a small town this one sure has a lot of assholes.
- God must love stupid people, he made so many.
- Hang up and drive.
- He who dies with the most toys still dies
- He who hesitates is not only lost but miles from the next exit.
- Honk if anything falls off.
- Horn broken…watch for finger!
- how many roads must a man travel before he admits he is lost?
- I do whatever my Rice Krispies tell me to.
- I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it.
- I know what you're thinking, and you should be ashamed of yourself.
- I like cats, too. Let's exchange recipes.
- I Love Cats ....they taste like chicken
- I miss my wife, but my aim is getting better.
- I plead contemporary insanity.
- I pretend to work. They pretend to pay me.
- I started out with nothing & still have most of it left.
- I thought I wanted a career, turns out I just wanted paychecks.
- I took an IQ test and the results were negative.
- I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.
- I work hard because millions on welfare depend on me.
- If I throw a stick, will you leave?
- If I want to hear the pitter patter of little feet, I'll put shoes
on my cat.
- If it was raining whores, I'd be the one to get hit with the queer.
- If men are idiots, you married their King
- If that phone was up your rear, maybe you could drive better.
- If you can read this I've lost my trailer.
- If you can read this, I can slam on my brakes and sue you!
- If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, riddle them with bullets.
- If you drink, don't park. Accidents cause people.
- I'm not a complete idiot, some parts are missing.
- I'm not tense, just terribly, terribly alert.
- I'm not your type. I'm not inflatable.
- I'm out of bed and dressed. What more do you want?
- I'm trying to imagine you with a personality.
- IRS - we've got what it takes to take what you've got
- It IS as BAD as you think, and they ARE out to get you.
- It's lonely at the top, but you eat better.
- Jesus loves you. Everybody else thinks you're an ass.
- Keep honking while I reload.
- My hockey mom can beat up your soccer mom.
- My inner child is a mean little shit.
- My kid beat up your honor student.
- Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.
- Pardon my driving, I'm reloading.
- Pass with caution, driver chewing tobacco.
- Please tell your pants it's not polite to point.
- So many pedestrians, so little time.
- So you're a feminist. Isn't that precious.
- Some people are alive only because it's illegal to kill them.
- Some people just don't know how to drive.
- Stress is when you wake up screaming & you realize you haven't
fallen asleep yet.
- Suburbia: where they tear out the trees & then name streets
after them.
- Teens, leave home now while you still know everything.
- The gene pool could use a little chlorine.
- This would be really funny if it weren't happening to me.
- Try not to let your mind wander. It is too small to be out by
itself.
- Very funny, Scotty. Now beam up my clothes.
- We are born naked, wet and hungry. Then things get worse.
- Well, this day was a total waste of makeup.
- You say I'm a bitch like it's a bad thing.
- You! Off my planet!
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