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| wardc.live.com.au |
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| Feeling a little bit ... NAUGHTY ?? (nudge nudge) ... then |
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| Y2K + 2 |
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| MORE NEWS |
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| Y2K + 3 |
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| Mar |
| Saturday March 1, Y2K + 3 |
| AUTUMN RESEARCH SEMEN-AHHH #1 An exciting night was had by all who attended the first research semen-ahhh of WARD "C"s Autumn campaign @ the LASS O'GOWRIE CLINIC. The list of auditory suppositories comprised: Vaseline Dream The Crystal Mat cybersex_69 Her Royale Thighness Bowling Club Sluts No Good For Love Chernobyl Cheryl Mammary Focus If I Had a Sackful of cats I'd See You in San Francisco During the semen-ahhh those recently favoured by THE WISE ONES were awarded their HIGH DICSTINCTIONS: MICHELLE CUSSAN of UTURN and STREAMER THE BEAGLE form 2RRR. WARD "C" were particularly honoured by Streamer's presence as she travelled many miles northerly up the dangerous Route of Haste to achieve visual access. Although not strictly a review, you can peruse Streamer's thoughts on the affair by reading the entry for March 3 in her online diary which is easily accessible on her acclaimed website @ http://streamerthe beagle.cjb.net MATRON X selected a VERY NAUGHTY MEMBER of the audience and duly instructed the naughty individual in Naughty Chair Procedure. KIERAN WICKS was MOST conspiuous by his absence and it is believed he is AFRAID of The Naughty Chair ... WARD "C" would like to thank BIRDBATH and poet Ashley Baker for supporting us and to those who attended the clinic and also the Post Semen-ahhh Bash back at The Asylum. |
| Monday March 3, Y2K + 3 |
| Tuesday March 4, Y2K + 3 |
| DOCTOR APOLLO contacts celebrated Newcastle photographer Linsey Gosper about bringing the long-anticipated photo shoot to fruition. Locations, props and classified information are discussed during this preliminary phase. |
| Wednesday March 5, Y2K + 3 |
| Friday March 7, Y2K + 3 |
| Monday March 10, Y2K + 3 |
| Tuesday March 11, Y2K + 3 |
| DOCTOR APOLLO organises a second semen-ahh @ the LASS O'GOWRIE clinic on the first Saturday in May ... |
| Thursday March 13, Y2K + 3 |
| Friday March 14, Y2K + 3 |
| WARD "C"@ THE KABARET ... A departure from (ab)normal semen-ahhh routine results in reduced auditory suppositories for audience members and more interaudio experimentation. The highlight for many, and particularly PSYCKO SURGEON, was when THE FIREMAN assisted DOCTOR APOLLO in a hazardous bovine cardiac synthetic neonatal extraction. Wrapped in membranes befitting composition, the small creature was successfully extricated and carefully stored for PSYCKO SURGEON's later manipulations. Suppositories supplied: Vaseline Dream The Crystal Mat Her Royale Thighness No Good For Love Mammary Focus WARD "C" would like to thank all the artists who appeared on the KABARET clinic bill with them - Fingers De Main, John Campbell, Prince Valiant and Evolluop |
| Monday March 17, Y2K + 3 |
| Kieran Wicks plays Bowling Club Sluts on his 2NUR FM program "Wet Cement" after promoting the upcumming clinic organised for the ALBION HOTEL this Saturday. The Ladies are overjoyed by this unexpected surge of attention and take full advantage of their unexpected spin, vibrating the otic cilia of all creatures attuned to the appropriate frequency of 103.7 MHz. |
| Sunday March 16, Y2K + 3 |
| PSYCKO SURGEON deteriorates to the extent of Triple Flatline whilst cancelling his appearance at today's scheduled photo shoot. DOCTOR APOLLO visits Linsey who obligingly agrees to reschedule in seven revolutions. |
| Kieran Wicks plays Date From Uranus second-up on his 2NUR FM program "Wet Cement" . |
Experiment Omega-5 Meeting #2 Y2K + 3. Classified information. |
| Experiment 2K3R12. First auditory experimentation outside The Fire Station. Classified Sanatorian information. |
| WARD "C"s appearance at THE KABARET, to be held at the ROYALE EXCHANGE clinic tomorrow night, is transmitted on ABC RADIO 2NC 1233 AM. The NEWCASTLE HERALD also cover The Sanatorians KABARET Semen-ahhh with a brief mention in the "what's on" section. |
| NURSE NASTY organises a tentative booking at The Lucky Country clinic for Sat 12 April. More details will be made available as they cum to hand. |
| WARD "C" receive the following communication in their databank: THE WISE ONES decree that STREAMER THE BEAGLE from 2RRR FM in Gladesville is hereby and forthwith awarded a HIGH DICSTINCTION for: LISTING WARD "C" on the AMRAP WEBSITE |
| Upon investigation, the AMRAP site displays Fourth Cumming as Streamer's NUMBER ONE recommended listening. WARD "C" feel very privileged to be honoured in this way. |
| NURSE NASTY negotiates a fourth March research semen-ahhh in Newcastle for WARD "C" at the: Albion Hotel, 72 Hannell St. WICKHAM + Jaime & Paco TIME: support act commences @ 9:30 pm CONTACT: Albion Hotel on (02) 4962 2411 |
| AUTUMN RESEARCH SEMEN-AHHH #2 An entertaining night was had by those who attended WARD "C"s second Autumn research semen-ahhh @ the LUCKY COUNTRY CLINIC. Sonic research revealed: Vaseline Dream The Crystal Mat cybersex_69 Her Royale Thighness Bowling Club Sluts No Good For Love Chernobyl Cheryl Mammary Focus This Song Has Only Got One Note If I Had a Sackful of cats I'd See You in San Francisco Despite The Sluts dislodging the backdrop and tampering with DOCTOR APOLLO's audio enhancer the performance was received well by the largely reclining clinic crowd. WARD "C" would like to thank both RUBIX CUBA and PUCKO & the GUNNIES for helping to make the night the success it was. "ROCK 'N' ROLL incident" after semen-ahhh creates wide discussion ... |
| GIG ANNOUNCED! |
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| taken from UTURN, issue #24, March 12 |
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| KABARET promotional material created by DEAN WINTER. photo (c) 2001 Linsey Gosper |
| 2nd LASS CLINIC CONFIRMED !! RESEARCH RESULTS will be again available for the appraisal of Earth natives and other cosmic meanderers at the: Lass O'Gowrie Hotel, 14 Railway St. WICKHAM SATURDAY MAY 3 + TBA TIME: support act commences @ 9:30 pm CONTACT: Lass O'Gowrie Hotel on (02) 4962 1248 |
| GIG ANNOUNCED! |
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| Monday March 31, Y2K + 3 |
| PULSE FM LIVE-TO-AIR INTERVIEW CD DELIVERY A copy of WARD "C"s February 3 live-to-air interview on "Boulevard" with Cat & Bella from PULSE FM arrives safely on The Snail. DOCTOR APOLLO and MATRON X are intrigued and most amused when they listen to the digital antics. MATRON X is a big fan of digital antics. |
| Friday March 28, Y2K + 3 |
| UNEXPECTED TURRAMURRA ENCOUNTER ... In a bizarre chance encounter, our favourite Space Beagle Streamer smells MATRON X in Sydney suburbia over the stench of land bound conveyances quenching their unleaded thirst. (Perhaps not unsurprisingly, since MATRON X had recently had an unpleasant encounter with some particularly reprehensible sluts, one of whom unwisely dared place her pungent experienced fingers on the Sanatorian Superstar). MATRON X played with Streamer and another RRR celebrity, Pawl EJ for a while before they departed, allowing her a distraction and at least some respite from the annoyingly persistent Slut Residue ... THE WISE ONES of course had organised this rendezvous. |
| Wednesday March 26, Y2K + 3 |
| Thursday March 27, Y2K + 3 |
| DATA TRANSFER EXCEEDED !! UNPRECEDENTED NAUGHTY CHAIR FRENZY ... THE WISE ONES are forced to close the WARD "C" website when site resources are exceeded by rampant Naughty Chair activity. Although this allows Naughties to escape their fate, they are most concerned about the appearance of The Chair's surface and how to deodourise the fabric. Electron extremists? Not this time. An email is received in the databank from Streamer the Beagle, claiming responsibility for the recent abundance of Chair activity. |
| Tuesday March 25, Y2K + 3 |
| Sunday March 23, Y2K + 3 |
| The disappearance of THE FIREMAN results in the much anticipated photo shoot again being postponed. Photographer Linsey Gosper is again sympathetic, with Sunday May 11 tentatively suggested as the new date, subject to the reappearance of the missing Sanatorian. |
| Saturday March 22, Y2K + 3 |
| ALBION HOTEL RESEARCH SEMEN-AHHH CANCELLED Due to the absence of THE FIREMAN and the associated Asylum panic, WARD "C" regret to announce that the Semen-ahhh planned for the Albion Hotel Clinic this evening has been cancelled. WARD "C" apologise for any inconvenience caused to any intergalactic trippers who had hoped for a bit of Semen-ahh stimulation and also to Jaime & Paco who were to appear as the support act. |
| Friday March 21, Y2K + 3 |
| FIREMAN KIDNAPPED ! In an alarming incident, THE FIREMAN is seen by a WARD "C" informant at an Identity Checkpoint, seemingly in the clutches of Electron Extremists. Upon searching The Asylum, NURSE NASTY discovers THE FIREMAN's Security ID in The Slut's Glory Box. THE WISE ONES are reluctant to comment on this misadventure, much to the chagrin of the Experiment omega-5 researchers . |
| Mandi the Wicked Fairy plays The Crystal Mat on her 5CST FM program "Sound Cage". |
| Streamer the Beagle plays If I Had a Sackful of Cats I'd See You in San Fransisco on her 2RRR FM program "Streamer Never Sleeps". |
| His absence is concerning and NURSE NASTY volunteers to search for him. Following the approval of THE WISE ONES, s/he is authorised to leave The Asylum. |
| WARD "C" receive the following communication in their databank: THE WISE ONES decree that STREAMER THE BEAGLE from 2RRR FM in Gladesville is hereby and forthwith awarded a DICSTINCTION for: WEBSITE TRAFFIC OVERLOAD |
