Table of Contents
Page 28 - Alternate Resurrection
Page 35 - "The Book of Chances"
Page 42 - The Evolutionary Classifieds
Page 49 - The "Official Church Leaders" Page
Page 56 - Letters to the Editor
Page 77 - Contact the fools - How you ca contact the us
Frank B. Finite
A "True" Atheist
Frank's brain:
Well, we may as well get started off on the right foot. I believe myself to be a "true" atheist, unlike most self-proclaiming atheists.
And what is a "true" atheist you ask? Let's just say by the end of this article you will have some understanding, hopefully.
You see, I am on a mission . . . a mission to educate atheists on atheism, and to correct the heresies that have crept into our system of knowledge. That is going to be the goal of all the articles that I provide for each issue of this publication.
So with that being said, let's get started with this month's topic . . .
First of all, do not ever address me as "Frank." Address me as "Frank's brain." Keep reading, you will understand.
Second, do not call me a "free-thinker," for there is no such thing. And you would be well advised to stop referring to yourself as a free-thinker as well. Using "atheist" is the proper designation.
I know I am going to get some negative reaction from "atheists" for what I am about to say, but that doesn't matter because they are not true atheists anyway and I am.
What it all boils down to is whether we have a "mind" or not, and if we do have one, "where" is it?
From the evidence I have seen, we do not have a mind. Now let me clarify.
A mind is usually referred to something within us which is at our command (our supposed "will"), and this so-called mind is supposed to control our brain which in turn controls our bodily actions.
This is all poppycock! There is absolutely no evidence for a mind (or will) at all! And all the scientifically observable evidence is for the reverse.
Now for those who disagree, tell me where this "mind" is located?
Maybe you will tell me that it is something that science hasn't discovered yet? That's fine and may be true, but it doesn't support your argument that one exists. My thoughts are based on what I can observe. Therefore, no evidence equals no substance.
Maybe you will tell me it is something that is invisible and can't be observed. Well you might as well go to church and call yourself a fundie. That is the same sorry argument they use for God, spirits, souls, angels, etc. - which is laughable!
I would hope that you would never use that argument in public - it would give us true atheists a bad name (and we would be forced to revoke your membership card and all privileges thereof).
You might say that you know from your own personal experience that you know that you have a mind, and that I should know that too. Again, you might as well back a dump truck up to the church door and unload all your possessions to them. That is the same thing the fundies proclaim, the same personal subjective experience that they know-that they know-that they know. Puh-lease!
Or you might say that "results" attest to the fact of this invisible mind. It secretly wills something to happen, and then it happens. Well, you might as well sell yourself into slavery of the church by becoming a preacher. Again, that is what they say, (wind, gravity, energy, etc. is the same as an invisible God making things happen), and we are supposed to be much smarter than that.
And if science ever DID discover where this mind is, that would merely substantiate the fact that it is just a part of our body and would prove that I know what our supposed "mind" really is.
"Okay smarty pants," you might say, "tell us what it really is!"
And I shall do just that.
You see, it is really very simple. We are stimulus response organisms. Every part of our body is merely a stimulus response entity.
Now, we know that the beginning of the universe happened, for whatever reason, by chance.
Then, for some strange reason,
life formed when certain atoms randomly mixed together.
And then, for even stranger unknown reasons, this life, which
accidentally formed, evolves more complex due to what spontaneously
happens to go on round it.
There are three known facts:
1) nature outside of us
2) our brains
3) our bodies
Now, something randomly happens
in nature which we, by chance, happen to observe.
This random "stimulus" causes chemical reactions in
our brains.
These chemical reactions cause "thoughts" to form and/or cause our body parts to do something.
And the process is repeated in one fashion or another.
This is the meaning of life, it is just chemical reactions and other natural laws randomly happening - nothing more.
So when you think that that you are "doing' something, you really are not "doing." Your brain is merely reacting to random stimuli and causing your flesh-bag of chemicals (your body) to do something.
And all of this is "scientific." It is observable, which is more than I can say for all of the pro-mind arguments. For more evidence, I point you to the stories of Pavlov's dog and Phineas Gage.
And this is why I said earlier to address me as "Frank's brain." Because there really is no Frank, or "me," or "my will," and certainly no "mind."
And this is also why I call myself a "true" atheist.
I know that this is going to be hard for many of my fellow atheists to swallow. But I am consistent! I do not pick and choose those parts of atheism which make me feel warm and fuzzy.
It's the whole enchilada, or nothing at all.
Now, if your brain is functioning properly, it will have noticed something. It will have noticed that my brain, throughout this whole article, has referred to itself as "I".
This is because my brain is highly evolved and knows that other, lesser-evolved, brains will have negative reactions to it's saying, "Frank's brain knows," instead of, "I know."
So, when my brain uses "I" in all of the articles that follow, it really means "Frank's brain."
You might say, "You have formed thoughts and opinions throughout this whole paper. And what about all of the world's great thinkers? Didn't they come up with new ideas?"
The thoughts and opinions that I have formed are, again, byproducts of stimuli and past experiences (which are stored in my brain as chemicals).
As for all of the great "thinkers" throughout history, it is exactly the same with them. They just got lucky because of their own experiences and, by chance, the "right" chemicals mixed in their brains causing these new thoughts. It is very simple.
Once you accept this, you will be free from bondage - the bondage of guilt. You are not responsible for your actions because there really is no "you". Your actions are merely reactions to random stimuli.
The key to true freedom is realizing that we are mere puppets to the brain.
P.S. - If anyone figures out the church leader password, let me know. I know they are up to something!