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Household Tips

Here are some little handy helpful household tips you will probably never hear on T.V....

  • If you are choking on an ice cube, don't panic. Simply pour a cup of boiling water down your throat and presto! The blockage will be almost instantly removed.
     
  • Clumsy? Avoid cutting yourself while slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold them while you chop away.
     
  • Don't buy expensive 'ribbed' condoms, just buy an ordinary one and slip a handful of frozen peas inside it before you put it on.
     
  • Putting just the right amount of gin in your goldfish bowl makes the fishes' eyes bulge and causes them to swim in an amusing manner.
     
  • An empty aluminum cigar tube filled with angry wasps makes a wonderful inexpensive vibrator.
     
  • Avoid arguments with the missus about lifting the toilet seat by simply peeing in the sink.
     
  • High blood pressure sufferers: simply cut yourself and bleed for a while, thus reducing the pressure in your veins.
     
  • A mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm clock, will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep when you hit the snooze button.
     
  • If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives, then you will be afraid to cough.
     
   Jokes (Pg1)

> Blonde Jokes
> Chainmail
> Choc. Lovers
> Chili Tasting
> Coloured
> Cybersex
> Drunk
> Farmer& wife
> Missing Wife
> Stupid Quotes
> What's Yours?
> R U a Redneck?
> Chicken Soup
> 20 Lashes
> Girls Diary
> Hangovers
> Computing Poem
> Barbies Letter
> Vaseline
> Household Tips
> Ignoranus
Pg 2 >>