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Evel Knievel (1970)


Cast:

George Hamilton is EVEL KNIEVEL!!!!
Sue "Lolita from the Kubrick version of the movie" Lyons is Linda
Dub "HUBBA-BUBBA guy!!!" Taylor is Turquoise Smith


What the box says:

An action-packed biography of one of the world's most famous daredevils, portrayed by George Hamiliton. Many of the wild stunts were performed by Evel Knievel himself.


Plot:

On a California speedway, a biker is on the track. We can hear the cheers without an audience. A line of bikers precede a limo. The chauffer lets out Evel. He is going to jump 19 cars. We learn about his personal philosophy that nothing is impossible. He doesn’t know fear and starts the bike.

The credits roll to on of the most hideous 70s folk rock songs ever. How Bradford Craig’s “I Do What I Please” isn’t ranked up with Sammy John’s “Chevy Van”?

Evel’s narration begins. He was raised in Butte, Montana. An area riddled with abandoned mines, young Evel is walking along the road when a car passes him. Suddenly, the road gives way and the car falls down an obviously bottomless pit. Young Evel drops a rock down and waits to hear it hit bottom. This incident apparently greatly influenced Evel.

At a daredevil, when Evel was 12, the guy blew up. His mother tried to keep him from seeing the aftermath. However, the crowd starts laughing at the guy. This also drew Evel.

Years later, Evel had to be enterprising. In a bar, he gets everyone interested in something big that will happen soon. It will be big, very big. He leaves the bar with everyone following him like the Pied Piper of Hamlin.

Walking to the nearby gas station, he climbs on the roof and lets him in an open window. Opens the front door, claiming the place is being robbed. Setting the door alarm off, the cops arrive. The townsfolk are all carrying sticks. The sheriff calls for the robber to turn themselves in. Evel volunteers to go in if given a gun.

He storms in the station and opens fire and claims the robber got away. Sheriff chases after the non-existent robber. Evel hands the cash out to the townsfolk?

Later, Evel inspects the ramp over the cars. At his first professional jump, Evel talks the rodeo operator, Turquoise Smith, into hiring him. Evel befriends one of the rodeo stars. After a batch of stock rodeo footage, the rodeo guy dies.

Years, later, his wife is asking about the jump, 19 car jump. Evel still has the jump to make.

Cut back to the first jump, the crowd mocks Charlie, unaware he’s dead. Turquoise claims Charlie will be fine and introduces Evel before the 2 truck jump. Evel comes out and makes a little speech before.


"I want to sing a little ditty I call Eye of the Tiger..."
He warms up before speeding up the ramp through the air over the trucks. The crowd cheers.

Early footage of Evel Knievel with 70s folk rock ensues.

Evel and Linda are frolicking when his doctor walks in on them. He checks Evel’s leg and is sure Evel will break it. Apparently, 150,000 fans will be watching. Evel has this fear the fans will trample him to death.

The Caesar’s Palace jump was where he broke most of his bones. Stock footage of the jump and agony of defeat or crashing ensues. An ambulance takes him away.

Evel is taken to the hospital where his doctor inspects the chart.

Surgery fu begins.

In the hospital room, Evel wants to get out soon. A couple of groupies are brought in for a visit. Doctor is sure that Evil will never walk again.

The groupies sneak Evel out and get him on his bike.


Bicycle built for 2 is for wimps, real men have bicycles built for 4..
Evel rides around the parking lot.

Flashback to how Evel met Linda. She knows him from his reputation of being in jail and is considered crazy. He puts the moves on her and convinces her to go for a bike ride.


Leader of the pack, the one man tougher than the Arthur Fonzerelli...
They get chased by the cops. Evel lets her off and keeps being chased by the cops. Wacky hi-jinks ensue. Evel breaks his arm in the crash after one of his jumps. He is given a stay in the grey bar hotel.

Linda goes on a date. Evel follows her stealthily. He doesn’t need a girl, got a bike.

Back to the current, Evel is his jumpsuit and readies for his jump. Linda wants them to go somewhere quiet. Evel wants to jump the Grand Canyon. Touching couple talk ensues.

Flashback to coeds on ice. Linda’s girlfriends can’t stand Evel. He talks her into a drive. Later, steamed windows are seen on the car. It must have been quite a bit of heated discussion.

Later, Linda tells Evel she’s going to college. Evel will drop in on her sometime.

Present, they mention something about Evel robbing a bank. Flashback, Evel can’t get a loan. He offers to split the tax money in city hall with the loan officer?

Night, a hole is blown in a wall. Unfortunately, it is the wrong wall. No one suspects that Evel was involved. He gets the right wall.

Present day, the spectators are starting to arrive at the speedway. Evel is interviewed.

We get a flashback to how Evel kidnapped Linda from college. The dorm mother won’t let Evel in.


"Hello, yes,my refrigerator is running...I need to catch it? "
He rides his into the house almost like in Animal House. Linda hops on the bike, and they’re off.

The next day, she calls her parents who have reported her as kidnapped. She tells them she married Evel.

Back to the present, Evel is warming up before the Star-Spangled Banner is played. He will jump 19 cars. It is a good jump and everyone cheers.

In the desert, Evel does another bit of his narration about how celebrities provide meaning to others. He must keep going. They don’t have a choice in life but death. The camera pans over the Grand Canyon. Evel’s death will be glorious…


What I say:

As the bottom feature on a 2 movie disc, I wasn't planning on covering it at first. The main feature will be posted sooner than later, and will truly show the gory, I mean, glory of the 80s. Evel Knievel wouldn't play on my DVD player at first. Then, if my chance or some omen, it did. The fact it was playing finally sealed the deal..If William Shatner could play Alexander the Great in a movie, head over to Agony Booth to endure that movie. Somehow, the idea of George Hamiliton as Evel Knievel is something every B-movie fan should rejoice. It makes more sense than John Wayne as Ghengis Khan in the Conqueror.

I've been trying to figure out if this is a TV-movie or a theatrical release. It seems almost as cheap a budget as many of the TV-movies from the early 70s. However, there are a couple of color metaphors (according to Spock) that definitely wouldn't be put into a TV-movie. IMDB lists a rating of GP which is the same thing as PG. So, I'm think this was a fairly tamed down version of Evel Knievel's life up to early 70s. Seen a few references, that claim Evel Knievel to be a drive-in movie which seems tame enough to a be a kid friendly version the daredevil's life.

I must admit I was born later in the 70s so never really know much more about Evel Knievel than him being a guy who jumped stuff on a motorcycle. In college in the late 90s, I did catch a couple of his son's Robbie's specials. Looking up some stuff, I finally saw some of the details that shows how a lot of people would want to pay to see him jump. Most of the movie explains why people watch Evel: is for him to hopefully crash. That does sound pretty mean spirited even for me. Scenes show people rush to get a close look at the crashed daredevil or laughing at the rodeo star and unaware of him dying.

I'm not sure if this movie understood the hypocrisy it portrayed. We see how people are drawn to daredevil shows and rodeos not to see the stunts but hope they crash, get throw or gored. Evel seems to thrive on the rush of the danger and the crowds. It seem more of the audiences weren't hoping for him to have a sucess jump but to wipe out. I'm not going to claim that people are better or more enlightened. Ever hear of a wrestling fan hoping for a wrestler to break his neck?

Most of the scenes that try to portray Evel as some sort of hellraiser fall flat. If he kept his library books overdue, that would make him more of a punk than what is in the movie. The scene with him breaking into the gas station claiming to go after a robber is insane. I know Evel is supposed to be the hero. Though, I'm not sure which is worse, the sheriff believing such a lame story or the townsfolk rejoicing when Evel hands them the cash from the station. The city hall robbery is about as logical. He offers to break in and steal the tax money and share it with a bank's loan officer. Why did he need the money? Evel Knievel isn't some sort of Robin Hood. Maybe the details would have explained these incidents better.

Ever read any bad self-insertion fan-fiction? Well, that would be like Shakepeare's Romeo and Juliet compared to Evel trying to woo Linda, his future wife. I am sure this movie would make a good volume on dating if you just did the opposite of Evel. Apparently, stalking is the secret to a woman's heart. If that isn't good enough add a smidge of kidnapping, too to seal the deal.

George Hamiliton playing Evel from a teenager up is hard to believe. Imagine a 50 year Henry Winkler acting like the Fonz, that is a good description of when George Hamiliton is riding around on his motorcycle. He is just too old. I'm sure getting another actor for a teen Evel wouldn't have cost that much. Director probably wanted to ring every bit of screen time for George Hamiliton.

Evel is portrayed as a daredevil, egomaniac, and on the edge of a nervous breakdown. It is awfully hard to root for him with a mood swing bound to happen in the next 30 seconds. Do we really want to watch a movie where the main character is so wishy-washy? I'm not expecting a rugged hero who is always right, etc.. I do think a likeable character isn't asking for too much. Just when Evel seems to be likeable, he does something mind-blowingly stupid to negate it.

Why didn't they just do the standard biography? Just go from childhood up besides all this jumping around, it may be tried and true at least not confusing. Evel Knievel has had a far more interesting life than this movie gives credit for. A lot of the details are glossed over. The cuts between times are a bit distracting to say the least. Going from the gas station to his first jump and bouncing between when he met his first wife and attempting to rob city hall? I did some research to try and geta better idea of the timeline. Thought, a lot of things seem to have been taken out of context like the city hall robbery. The gaps in the story are so wide Evel Knievel couldn't jump them...



2 NINJAS

Quotable Dialogue

"It truly is an honor to risk my life for you today."
"Braggin' don't look good on a young man."
"I can get sterile!!!"
"I'm a master of all sports."
"There's a man in the house."
"I am the last gladiator in the New Rome. I go into the arena and I compete against destruction and I win! And next week I go out there and I do it again."


Morals of the Story

Roads spontaneously give way under the weight of ccars.
George Hamiliton is friend to all midgets that buy him drinks.
Women are not fond of being paddled by fly swatters.
No one is worried about explosions in the middle of the night.
Bathing women aren't disturbed by bikers riding by them.