Journal September 18, 97 September 30, 97 October 15,97 October 20, 97 February 3, 98 June 20, 98 July 16, 98 August 14, 98 August 22, 98August 31, 98 September 4, 98 September 22, 98 September 25, 98 September 27, 98 October 3, 98 October 11, 98 November 1, 98 January 2, 99 May 10, 99 June 17, 99 July 7, 99 July 14, 99 July 20, 99 August 5, 99 August 17, 99 August 24 99 November 1 99 December 27, 99

August 14, 98      I re-reed all this book, this journal I've made in the pass years. I had only one regret, is to still be alive, everyone is pissing me off these days. I mean only my family is getting on my nerves. My parents want me to move from the house, just because I smoke in my bedroom window. I wish I could move but where? And how? There's no place for me to go. My friends, she is living everything I lived. I try to help her and all because I love her. But how can I help someone when I can't even help my self. I tell her not to act stupid and do what I did and that she wants to live, she is worth in this world but if I tell her that it wouldn't be the same for me. I'm telling her what to do, but I can't take care of my self, I can't get my own answers to work for myself. I know they are smart but it's something I will have to do before I tell others.