Hourglass 2 Outpost

Eden 2
Outpost

I was born in Solum near by Skien in Telemark, Norway - March 6. 1951. I grew up in my grandparents house, where my mother and father had a small apartment on the 1. floor. To get money to build our own house, my father started out as a sailor, and he was doing this most of my childhood. Leaving me and my sister to my mother's care until I was around 15 years old. This was really a tragedy, since my relationship to my father was totally ruined during these years. First of all because I didn't see him - and then because of all the stories about him I heard from friends and family. They had become Jehovah's Witnesses, and my father didn't want to be a witness. The result - he was a no good person.

Early Childhood As I said, I grew up together with my mother and my grandparents, and my 3 year younger sister. While I was just a kid, too small to remember anything of it, my grandparents became involved with the Jehovah's Witnesses. And naturally, my mother followed them into the sect. This made problems between my father and mother, since he was not interested in this religion at all. He wasn't much interested in religion all together, as a matter of fact, and he wanted to live a normal life. But - that should turn out to be impossible. Just to mention an example of the problems he faced. Our family went to Sweeden to visit a convention. My father had been out on the sea for many years, and just when we were in Sweden, his ship came there. But my mother refused to visit him, and we couldn't see him. All because she would rather be on the convention!

Problems with medical questions The Jehovah's Witnesses have always been weird in medical questions, and these things made problems for me as for everyone else. As a child I had plenty of problems with my tonsils, and the doctors wanted to remove them. But my mother denied them to do that. For some reason she was told by the Watchtower that "Jehovah had given us the tonsils - and it was obvious Jehovah had given us the tonsils because he intended them to be there!" Also, it was said, people became less intelligent when they had their tonsils removed. They would have problems in school, because their consentration would be less effective. So, I had to go through my childhood with huge problems. Always trouble with infections and stuff.

Also, when I started in school, every child had to be vaccinated, and THAT wasn't easy. The Watchtower had for years screamed about how awful this was, and that vaccination was disrespect of the laws of God. Also, it was absolutely useless, and "pumping animal blood into our veins would only cause damage". So, it was quite a fuzz about this. But, even if some of the elders felt this couldn't be done, the Watchtower had changed God's view on this question, and I got my vaccines in the end. I was lucky - since I wasn't born a few years earlier. Then I would probably had marks burned with acid to "pretend" having been vaccinated - as was common among JWs. A cute little custom that originated in the USA.

We moved to Skien As long as we lived in my grandparents house, in Pollen outside Skien, there was no big problems for me. This was a little place, and the few kids my age and I were great friends. Also, I was just a kid then. We lived here until I was 9 years old. Then my father had made enough money to build a house, and we moved to Skien. That's when the problems really started to be serious.

From I was old enough to walk, I had been dragged out in the "field service". So called "witnessing" from door to door. I was afraid to meet my friends, naturally, since they then would make fun of me when they met me again. As example in school, where they naturally made fun of me because of this. But when I lived in Pollen that was not this big problem, since we normally went some miles away, and then we met people I didn't know anyway. There should be a law against using young kids like walking message-boards, like I had to be all my youth. When we sisited conventions, i had a "standard outfit", a big message board I had to carry. I had to walk around like a clown, in "funny" cloths, and huge signs telling people about the End or what ever was the "Big Truths" of the convention.

When we moved, all this changed. We started to go to a bigger congregation, and it was a pressure on me to spend more time witnessing, being a good student at the "Theocratic Ministry School" (The Watchtowers Sales School), and to get baptized. The JWs claim not to baptize children, but they do. Children 6 years old is just that - children. I don't remember exactly when I baptized. I was not that much interested in this, but it was an enormous pressure to do just that. I believe I was about 14 years or so.

The only times we ever went anywhere, was when the Jehovah's Witnesses had a convention. And then we had to sit absolutely scilent at every meeting, the whole day. If we did not, it was out on some toilet to get some spanking. The "mature elders" was kind to my mother, and even offered to "help her" discipline me if necessary. Always we had to wear shields saying we were Jehovah's Witnesses. Always go dressed like nobody else our age, always be "special". Parents forcing their children to do things like this, should loose child custody for ever!

The problem was that I in fact believed these things. I saw with my own eyes that the relationship between my parents was bad, and I started hating him. All the people I knew - and my grandmother and the elders were especially eager to talk dirty about him - told me he was to blame. And I blamed him. This made our relationship totally in ruins, but ironically that might be the reason I came out of the Watchtower grip after all.

Today I know better. Now I know more about the reasons, the things that really happened. My father didn't give my mother more money than she absolutely needed, because he knew that when he gave her more - she gave the rest to the Watchtower anyway! He didn't want to spend years out in the sea just to feed the Watchtower, and I can understand that. We didn't have any more money to spend no matter what my mother did have. If she had anything to spare, she gave it to the Watchtower. Or to their traveling representatives, that claims they never get such presents. The only word for that is tax fraud!

When we were on a convention in Stockholm, Sweden, my father's ship was there. But my mother, strongly advised by the elders, didn't even go to see him. Why should she? He had just been more than a year in the sea to make money for us to live - and there was a convention going on! I have to admit that the elders responsible for this, people like Asbjoern Wikstroem, Sverre Johnsen, Bjoern Andreassen and others, really deserves my disrespect for what they did. All the lies these people told me about my father is really disgusting. But, I didn't know that then. That was something I learned about many, many years later - when my father was an old man - and we didn't have many years left to get to know each other.

An eager guy I was really "eager" in the "truth". It was some kind of self defence. In school it was really badt. I couldn't participate in anything, since absolutely everything was sin, and against Watchtower regulations. Against "the laws of Jehovah", they called it. Naturally nobody did understand nothing about this. Growing up like a JW is an advanced for of child abuse! My "friends" in school did pick on me, and I was naturally never accepted as "one of the boys". Always an outsider. That was not strange. I had to dress differently, could not participate in anything - and had to run around with shields telling anyone I was a JW.

So, to compensate for this (and that's naturally the reason for this practice in the first place), I was a really good JW kid. Running around on meetings, talking to the congregation-gods, the elders, and was trying to get as many speeches as possible in the Ministry School. Also I naturally tried to be as much as possible out in the "field" with "mature brothers". People I then looked upon as Gods, but as I today respect less than the stuff the dogs drop on the sidewalk!

Many, many times I was out in the field with the first Branch Overseer in Norway, Marwin Anderson. He was sent here from Brooklyn, to build the Norwegian Branch. Later I used to go out in the field with all the traveling overseers, as often as I could.

Thor Samuelsen taught me to cheat So. What made an eager guy like me start wondering what was going on? I never even DREAMED of cheating on the "Field - reports". Every JW has to deliver a field-report every month, stating how many hours she/he has been knocking doors - how much literature delivered, etc. The Big-Boss of today, The Branch Coordinator Thor Samuelsen, was the one who taught me how to cheat on these reports. And I was surprised when he told me that "everyone" at Bethel did the same thing. And how was this done:

A Jehovah's Witness shall report the time used witnessing. From the first door knocked, until he stops knocking doors. So, what was the trick that the traveling overseers used to get THEIR hours? Just like this:

We should meet a place about an hour driving from where Thor Samuelsen picked me up. The first thing we did, was knock on a door, and stuff a few magazines down the throat of the person living there. THEN we started driving for an hour. Spent some time with the others before THEY started witnessing, and we went out together with them. The difference was that we had 1,5 hours to report already. If we visited another door at the return, we had 2,5 hours to report without doing anything. The trick was to visit the person we started out with again. That was a "return visit" - and counted real good in the book.

Small details I started noticing minor details like this. Started noticing that the most famous hobby in the congregation was slandering. Started to discover that many people used tranquilizers like sugar, and that some of the brothers was drinking heavily. I did not at that time see anything wrong with the religion.

An old man in the Congregation, one of the so called anointed, became my friend. His name was Ragnvald Westlie. He told me lots of things about the Watchtower and their changing doctrines. He did not even respect the leaders in the Watchtower Society at the time, since they had distorted the truths taught by Russell. Ragnvald was really a Russellite, and he really despised Rutherford and his lot.

As a results of these talks, he gave me lots of literature. As a matter of fact - the library of Skien Congregation has got most of their old material from me! AND THIS WAS INTERESTING READING. I discovered that the Watchtower - just as Ragnvald told me - lied about their history. They cheated. Russell did say something quite different from what the Society SAID he said, etc. All by all I started to loose interest in Jehovah's Witnesses as such, and I did not go out in the field service that much any more. Also I started skipping meetings.

BUT. I still believed their teachings about doom and Armageddon!

Starting to "flip out" I discovered there was other things in life than going to meetings and knocking doors. I met a girl, and she became my fiancée. Naturally that ended with the two of us in bed - which gave me great problems with the congregation. I did believe this was terribly wrong, and I had extremely bad conscience - which is the sign of a good JW. The worse conscience - the better JW. So, I turned myself in to the "elders" in the congregation.

Well, there was a judgmental committee, and they wanted to know everything about everything. The only question I was not asked was my shoe-number.

I was not disfellowshipped, but I was "marked". In the congregation someone did tell everyone that I was on trial, and that they had to beware. I was a dangerous guy, naturally. The only thing I had done wrong was sleeping with my fiancée, 17 year old I was at the time.

Well, I was mad as a hatter. I didn't see no reason for being "marked", and I did not look at myself as a bad person at all. Nobody wanted to have anything to do with me anymore, since I was "bad association". So - why should I stay home at all? I was finished with meetings, finished with knocking doors, and since nobody of the congregation-members wanted to have anything to do with me, I was finished with them too.

Moved out So, I got myself an apartment, and I did not forget to tell the congregation elders that I had slept with another girl too. I just wouldn't have them visiting me, I just wanted to get rid of them for ever. Naturally I was disfellowshipped - which was the reason for me to tell them this in the first place. Now I was free of the meetings, the endless repetitions of the Watchtower's homemade idiocy. Free of getting idiotic answers to even more idiotic questions. Free from holding speeches, and going from door to door.

But what I WAS NOT free of, was the fear.

The sheer terror of knowing I had only 6 years left to live!! I knew - I believed - that the world was to end in 1975. I did believe in the Watchtower teachings - and I was scared to death. Naturally, I wouldn't admit that to a living soul - but I was.

I won't die not having tried everything possible I soon decided one rule for life from then on. It was OK to die, but when I did I should have tried everything. All the things I never was allowed to - and all the things nobody even dared think of! It was OK going to the bottom - but with the flag on top, and on 1. class!

So, I started out as a traveling salesman, selling books. And I was good. Very good - and I had better training than anybody else. The Watchtowers sales school was better than the rest, so I did a lot of money. Within a few months I was a team-boss, and had 5 - 10 other youngsters working for me. As early as 1970, I did about 800 US dollars a week after tax! And I didn't misuse my money. I spent every dime on girls, girls, girls, vine and singing. In the beginning. Later it was drugs, the more the merrier. Normally I drank a bottle of Whisky, 2-3 bottles of wine, and around 10 pints of beer - every day - if it was not a party going on. And it was at least three times a week. Drugs came as extras.

I had especially fun checking up girls that were Jehovah's Witnesses. When ever I spotted some of them on a restaurant, I SHOULD get to bed with them. I couldn't eat or rest before I managed that - and I was never hungry. The JWs are obsessed with sex. They don't think of much else - and most JWs marry extremely young. AND - they "all" get a child born one month early. Strange.

I won't spend too much time telling about my rather wild life, but I have tried most things - and I'm not the most easy man to surprise or shock. I've been there, done that. And maybe that's the reason I am not that quick to condemn others. Maybe that's the reason I can understand peoples pain - understand and accept that they can do totally idiotic things - and still be there for them.

I came back One should believe that I now would be finished with the Watchtower. After 1975 came and went, and the world was still there. But it didn't. In between I had married twice, had a few children, and wanted to relax a bit. Some day a JW knocked at my door, and we started a "bible-study".

To make a long story short - it ended with me returning to the Jehovah's Witnesses.

Now all kinds of things started to happen. My marriage started to crank up. Elders came home to me, and found that the reason had to be my records. I had lots of them, and some were "demon-possessed", I was told. So out they went. But these "demons" wasn't gone, obviously.

So we moved. To Rjukan in Telemark (We had been living in Kristiansand, where I was in Vaagsbygd Congregation). Here I started working on a factory. After a while there was articles in the Watchtower about organ-transplants. That this was cannibalism. That a human didn't use the brain for thinking - but the heart. That it was a "hole" inside the head, a traveling overseer told us, where "something" had been removed by Jehovah, and that this would be filled in paradise.

I started to wonder what the Hell I was doing, so I started looking in my literature. I did have (and still has) a huge collection of Watchtower literature, and I found that the history was totally different that the Watchtower said.

Lies, lies, and lunacy I discovered that the Watchtower today lie about their history. That they had changed their teachings back and forth. Not once, but time after time. That their medical record is a record of lunacy. That they had made hundreds of prophecies - and had an unbeatable record: 100% MISS!!!

So, I started to loose interest. I liked best to go out in the field by myself, because then I didn't go out in the field at all. I could be where I should be - and went out together with the others. But as soon as I was alone, I went into the forest, laid down to read a book or something - and returned when I should.

Or - I simply was back home, listening to Pink Floyd, and reported 3 hours for nothing. And I really didn't care. The presiding overseer in Rjukan swindled the insurance company by deselecting the speedometer. He drove to fast, and a lot of small things like that. Others were fixing their taxpapers. One JW came frequently to our home to take a cigarette, since my wife smoked. I simply started to see the hypocrisy in it all.

Divorced again So, my wife managed to get pregnant, and off she was. I moved back to Skien, and didn't want to see her any more. She even returned, asking for good weather - which interested me as much as getting back into the Watchtower. This was, naturally, reported to the elders, that was awfully mad. As a Christian I couldn't do that, they said. I on my side, said that was my business - not theirs - and they didn't enjoy that.

Bits and pieces from this "confidential" talk leaked out to all members of the congregation (Skotfoss congregation), and I asked the elders what the #$%&/( they meant by telling everyone what I had told them. No answers. Just that I had to watch out if I didn't want trouble.

So, I decided I wanted to take no more crap. I had no place to live, so I stayed with a "friend", a JW. In the neighborhood there was a married JW "sister", living apart from her husband at the moment. I was a lot by her, and even slept with her. This I did tell to the elders myself - since I couldn't care less what they did about it. The girl was furious - since she felt this was none of the elders business. But the result was that nobody was disfellowshipped - even though I was given a warning. Nothing happened to the girl at all - and I guess she said I was to blame for it all. Said what they wanted to hear - because she didn't even get a warning!

I left Well, they didn't disfellowship me, strange enough. So I simply left. I told the elders they could ask me to their committee meetings as much as they wanted - but I wouldn't come. And - I wouldn't answer.

Since this I have NEVER heard one word from them. They have NEVER given me a message I'm disfellowshipped, and I have NEVER sent a letter of resignation.

My wife of today also did leave the congregation at that time. She was called to an eldermeeting too, and refused to come. She got a letter stating "they found it most correct to disfellowship her because she didn't show up when it was demanded of her".

Today, we are both happy. We're free of the Watchtower, even though our former "friends" are spreading lies about us all over the place. But that be it. We're happy - and I couldn't care less what they say about me....

Today I'm a journalist and an editor of a small Business Magazine in Telemark Norway.

• The Watchtower Observer
• My Story