Check out the blogs from...
2005,
December, November, October, September,
August, July, June, May,
April, March, February, January,
or 2003!
Return to the Dog House!
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Check out the blogs from...
Return to the Dog House! |
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Wednesday, February 25, 2004
Fear - it's hard not to let it take control of your life. Fear of the unknown...of the things you can't control. Fear of the future...of making wrong choices that may affect the rest of your life. Fear of showing others that you get scared too...that you're not always as strong as you seem. Fear of vulnerability...of putting yourself in a position where you could get hurt.
But if one were to live in fear every single day of his life, it's not much of a life then, is it?
I've been trying to let these fears go...I nailed them to that cross just 3 days ago...yet I find myself already trying to take those things back down. I know they are no good to me...that God wants me to give them to Him and trust Him with them...but they're so familiar to me - even when they cause me pain...they feel familiar and secure.
I've found it hard to concentrate on my school work lately...There's just so many things running through my head right now and I can't process it all. Math has been mental drills everyday, French has been grammar and oral presentations, physics is wearing me down and enduring Christensen's chem classes is killing me.
...yet somehow...I know He'll pull me through. That along the way, He'll have His angels on guard and ready to keep me going and help me along.
For when I am weak,
He is strong,
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Thursday, February 19, 2004
Yup! After 2-1/2 years of high school, I've finally come to realise that there's no need worrying about the results of a test, exam or presentation after you've completed it...There's nothing you can do to make it any better or any worse - so why worry about it, right?
And it's a good thing I've come to realize this near the beginning of this semester seeing all the tests, exams and presentations I'll be doing for school...plus I have a tendency of worrying about other non-school-related things as well.
Life's life and there's nothing we can do, but live it the best we can. hehe...There's a quote that says: "Only some of us can learn by other people's mistakes. The rest of us have to be the other people." And, well - if you don't know already - hate to break it to you, but no matter how perfect you are or how perfect you seem to be, there's bound to be times when you've gotta be "the other people"=P Tough lesson to learn...even tougher to actually experience...God has His ways of breaking it to each of us in His own gentle and loving way=)
God is good. ALL the time.
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Wednesday, February 18, 2004
ARGH! I wanted to get that chemistry test over with today!!! But what happens!?! Christensen didn't "have time" to write it! *sigh* and teacher's always expect students to do our work whenever it's due! *sigh*...Sorry, I know you can't do anything about it...and neither can I, but...yeah...me not writing that test today just threw off my homework plans for tonite=(
For the first time this semester, I managed to complete my math in class, my French at lunch - and hoping that chem was the test, and, therefore, no homework - I was gonna concentrate on getting the physics of parabolic motion straight in my head. But...yeah...now there's an extra section to study for chem and 15 other practice problems to do (I doubt Christensen will check it, but I guess I might as well do them as a bit of review=P)
Anyhoo...looking back at the past few weeks (maybe even months), I've realized that God has, once again, been faithful and has carried me through. I've been helping out with Sunbeam (the preschool/kindergarten kids) at church. I helped out last June to August and this term (December to February) and, to be honest, it started out as a total drag! I help out with the 3-1/2 to 4-1/2 year olds and, man, are they hyper!?!
But this past Sunday, being the 3rd last class of the term, I realized how much I've gotten to know them. I give them piggy back rides, they wave and say "hi" to me when they see me in the hallways, when they're feeling sick or tired, they use me as a cushion and try to nap...awww...I'm gonna miss them=( I'm wondering if I should go help out this following term (March to June), too, cuz they're always short on people...and I most likely won't be able to help out the term after that (June to August)=S
Anyhoo...I had a really tough 1st semester - not so much school-wise, but family and relationships, spiritually, stress...and well, everything else that goes into being a 16-year-old Chinese female high school student=P This semester looks a li'l tough on the academic side, but in terms of family and all the other stuff, it looks, well, maybe not better, but more manageable or bearable=)
So...I've gotta go now...physics and chem awaits me...I think I can hear my textbooks calling me (uh oh...I'm hearing voices - that can't be a good thing, can it?)=S
Going crazy?...you never know...
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Saturday, February 14, 2004
Isn't that the sweetest quote ever? hehe...my sister bought me a "Le Petit Prince" agenda a month or so ago and yeah...this was one of the quotes it had. I really want to buy that book - the French version...and maybe the Englsh version, too. It's sooo cool, cuz it's the first French novel/book I've ever read (other than Petit Nicolas in gr. 9, but we never actually finished it).
Today, my Chinese school teacher was away, so we watched "Hero" (a Chinese movie) in class. Unfortunately, the remote to the DVD player was missing, so we watched it in Mandarin...so no one really understood what was happening. And since the movie didn't take up the entire class, we ended up sitting around for the last 40 minutes of class doing nothing.
I'm really tired from yesterday. I was out the whole day and didn't get home 'til about 12:30am and didn't go to bed until 1:15-1:30am. I had school, then chamber choir (we're singing songs from "The Lord of the Rings"...sooo cool - only I don't understand what exactly we're singing cuz most of it is Elvish=P), hung out at Hubert's with Jen, went to church (Jen and Celine had Bible Study prep), then to Swiss Chalet (Jeff, Hubert and I had to talk about WAY worship...and it took forever for dinner. The place was sooo busy), then back to church for the actual Bible study and then until 12am practicing for worship. Yup...that was my Friday. I was so out of it by the end of the nite that when I realized I could hardly read the poem I was supposed to recite for Chinese school today, I didn't really care and just went to sleep=P
Well, it's lunch time! I've gotta go...and then I'll have to clean Poopie's cage (haven't done so in a while...the poor thing's gonna die if I don't do it today=S) and then...you guessed it!...HOMEWORK!!!...hehe
Hungry and tired...
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Thursday, February 12, 2004
Man...It's been almost a week since I last blogged!
WARNING: EXTREMELY LONG BLOG UP AHEAD! UPDATE ON PAST WEEK. (Now that I've warned you - please read only if you've got no more homework to finish...or nothing better to do...)
Anyhooey, school has been tough since the last time I updated this - actually, life, in general, has gotten tougher.
This past Monday, I had a half day, but I was soooo tired from Sunday (having gone to bed at 2am - I couldn't sleep) that I just sat around (trying to work with no success) when I got home. Piano killed me, but my teacher saw that I had been having a tough week and had the decency of not yelling at me, but just sounded kinda disappointed in me (which in many ways is worse than her yelling at me).
Tuesday was a split day (half semester 1 schedule and half semester 2 schedule) and I got my semester 1 report card. Not bad - other than my French mark which dropped.
Yesterday was Celine's 17th birthday!!! (Happy Birthday, Celine!) I didn't do much other than go to prayer meeting (I went with Cecilia - she skipped her film class, cuz they were gonna watch Bowling for Columbine and she already watched it before...PLUS my dad didn't want to drive me) When I got home, I fell asleep doing my homework, but, luckily, I had already completed everything that was due today=P
Tonite is probably the nite I was assigned the most homework these first 2 weeks of semester 2...but, somehow, having done quite a bit of homework from each subject at school (and on the bus ride home), I managed to finish pretty early, catch up a bit with my chemistry notes and take a nice relaxing shower. God is good.
It's a good thing I have a relatively empty schedule this weekend, cuz, today, I found out that I have a 3-minute French presentation and a math test on Monday, a physics test on Tuesday, and a chemistry test on Wednesday.
hehe...there's was an article in the Talon Times (school newspaper) about how you know you'll be spending Valentine's Day alone...hehe...one of them was: you've got homework. Yup, sadly enough, that's gonna be me=P hehe...
And that's just my school life. As if I'm not drowning in work already, balancing everything else in my life (i.e. church, spiritual life, family, friends, health, rest and relaxation...) is wearing me out. Life just gets easier and easier, doesn't it? hehe...Yeah. Right.
Especially with family. With my aunt here, there's been a lot of additional tension in the house and a lot of other adjustments we've had to make to accommadate her. I've realized how much effort it takes to not step on people's toes - even when you really want to - and how hard it is to not let other people get me agitated when they accidentally or intentionally step on my toes.
My only condolence is this: "No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it." - 1 Corinthians 10:13
I've come to realize and really know that everyone has their own story, problems and situations to deal with. You're reading this...and you probably have your problems and worries (in some ways, mine may seem bigger than yours, but in many other ways, yours are bigger than mine). But be glad to know that God will always provide a way out. I'm struggling to believe and to trust in it - but God promised us that He would - and if God won't keep His promises, who will?
I stumble, I fall,
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Friday, February 6, 2004
Just got home from school! Man, the first week of semester 2 is finally over! Not too much homework over the weekend, but with Chinese school (eeps! Gotta finish that homework....) and WAY committee meeting tomorrow, and church, ground-breaking ceremony and WAY Winter Retreat worship practice on Sunday, little homework is good=)
I've been keeping up with my physics and chem notes (I've been reading the text and taking notes as well, so I don't have to do as much work when studying for tests/exams later, but man...it takes quite a bit of work to review and write notes every other day - if not every day=S).
Chem has been kinda boring so far. It's basically go home, read the textbook on your own time and pray that you understand the content. Gr. 12 French has mainly been "getting-to-know-your-fellow-classmates" kinda phase. Physics has been the most educational - a lot of helpful review and we've done 2 simple labs. And last, but not least, math has been work, work and more work - not very hard, just a LOT of it=P
Anyways, I've gotta go eat and do my Chinese school stuff. Catch ya later! Hope you all had a great week!
Luv,
-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~- Quote of the Blog:
Sunday, February 1, 2004
Hey people! How's everyone's semester? I've got a full academic semester, consisting of: chem., gr. 12 French, physics and math. I'll miss my first semester...it was fun for the most part...having been more hands-on work than writte assignments. hehe...here's a pic that Julie took of the townhouse complex we built in construction.
If I remember correctly, going clockwise from the lower right-hand corner, it's Jamie's, Julie's, Justin's and mine...weird...all their names start with a "J", except for mine=P Unfortunately, my aunt was a bit careless in bringing my house down to the basement and then decided to put one of my large stuffed animals on top of it...so, the porch is in need of some repair...nothing a li'l bit of time, hot glue and burnt fingers can't fix!
Anyways, you're probably curious as to why I chose the quote I did today=) And well, this li'l Thai boy, named Waithaya, is the reason! Pretty cute, eh? hehe...He's only 6 years old and his nickname's Mee. I'm sponsoring him with a friend=) If you're not already sponsoring a child (or even if you are) and you would like to sponsor a (or another) child, check out the World Vision website! And, if you're "poor" like me, hook up with a friend and pitch in together!
Yeah...I mean, how can it not break your heart knowing that 27,000 children day every day due to hunger and preventable causes? And sometime last week, when we were eating dinner, my sister mentioned the homeless people...and I just felt so bad, cuz there we were, eating a nice meal in a well-heated home, while there's people a 30-minute drive away, freezing outside in the snowstorm with nothing, but the clothes on their back and with hardly a bite to eat! Yet statistics say that if everyone eats just what they need, there is sufficient food for everyone! It's crazy! But, yeah, we're sooo blessed to be alive in a well-developped country in this day and age. Sometimes it so hard to imagine, but sometimes all you need to do is take a walk through downtown Toronto.
Hope you're all doing well! I'd write some more, but it's already 10:30pm and I think I'm gonna go blind if I spend anymore time on the computer=P hehe...I'll save it for tomorrow=) Have yourselves a great week!
Is everything blurry, or is it just me?
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Check out the blogs from...
2005,
December, November, October, September, August, July, June, May, April, March, February, January,
or 2003!
Return to the Dog House!
